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Author Topic: You can't make this shit up...  (Read 171363 times)
koro
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Reply #140 on: February 02, 2013, 04:04:15 PM

My neighbor's attic is filled with a couple thousand bats thanks to their house being the only one on the block with improper sealing of their attic vent covers. When I first moved here I'd sit on the porch just after sundown and watch them as they spent the next hour flying out to go about their business.

I honestly do not understand how they can live with the noise, and I imagine the smell of guano is horrendous.
Furiously
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Reply #141 on: February 02, 2013, 05:37:40 PM

Meth lab smell probably hides it well.

IainC
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Reply #142 on: February 02, 2013, 06:33:21 PM

In a lot of places, bat habitats are extremely protected. If bats take up residence then many places don't let you demolish, rebuild or otherwise disturb the habitat.

- And in stranger Iains, even Death may die -

SerialForeigner Photography.
Lantyssa
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Reply #143 on: February 03, 2013, 09:20:26 AM

As kids we used to 'play' with the bats around our house.  We'd throw frisbees up in the air at twilight and they'd swoop around them.  Awesome animals. 
We'd throw up tennis balls.  They'd fly up and down with them.

Hahahaha!  I'm really good at this!
kaid
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Reply #144 on: February 04, 2013, 07:17:22 AM

Hehe when we were young and stupid me and my brother used to throw choke cherries up to the bats they seemed to really like them but it was kinda funny watching a bat chewing on one as those things are so tart lots of lip licking and head shaking but the lil guys would finish them off.
shiznitz
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the plural of mangina


Reply #145 on: February 04, 2013, 01:37:24 PM

In my teenage years, we used to dry cast fly rods in the evening when we saw bats.  A bat can take a lot of line before it splashes down.  Yes, most of them drowned before we got them to sure.  Kids are cruel yadda yadda.

I have never played WoW.
Sheepherder
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Reply #146 on: February 04, 2013, 02:26:12 PM

A cigarette isn't hot enough to ignite fuel vapors, however the lighter flame to light the cigarette will do so easily.

It actually is, but the ash acts as an insulator to external flammables while inside the ash where the heat is there is also little oxygen due to sustained combustion.
Der Helm
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Reply #147 on: February 14, 2013, 11:52:51 AM

So, yesterday I met a person (at work) who managed to annoy me enough that I almost punched him in the face.

"I've been done enough around here..."- Signe
Draegan
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Reply #148 on: February 15, 2013, 06:33:33 AM

So, yesterday I met a person (at work) who managed to annoy me enough that I almost punched him in the face.

Good story.
Der Helm
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Reply #149 on: February 15, 2013, 09:47:11 AM

So, yesterday I met a person (at work) who managed to annoy me enough that I almost punched him in the face.

Good story.
I had 2 beers when I posted this, but I am pretty sure my original post was a bit longer than that. Looks like I accidentally the most of it. Lets see if I muster enough outrage to retype it.

"I've been done enough around here..."- Signe
Cadaverine
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Reply #150 on: February 15, 2013, 04:25:50 PM

Looks like I accidentally the most of it.

Looks like the beer's still working.  Oh ho ho ho. Reallllly?

Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin to slit throats.
Jimbo
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Reply #151 on: February 16, 2013, 11:12:20 AM


Ya Bath Salt Story Time!

1st: Had a guy come in middle 40's, not acting right, two of the nurses went to get him off the drive, they came in wheeling him in, worried he looked like a big heart attack in progress. I took a look and something just wasn't right about him. He was moaning really loud, sweating up a storm, had a "crazy look" in his eyes and about him. It was the middle of winter and he had no shirt on, just a pair of shorts. We kept trying to talk to him, he would grab his chest, was all over the bed--couldn't sit still, was withering all over the place, sweat is pouring off him. We finally get him still long enough for an EKG, it is sinus tach about 140's (not good, but not a heart attack), get an IV started. There are 3 RN's, 1 Police/security, 1 ER Doc, so we are trying to keep him in the bed and get somethings on him going. The doc and the other 2 girls (RN's) go to get some meds, I've come in with more supplies, and the pt jumps up out of bed, stands at the sink, howls, then growls, grabs a paper towel and eats it. I'm like what the fuck, this isn't cardiac at all. Security and I manage to get him back in the bed, one of the other RN's was talking to the wife and she says, "he has been doing K-2 and bath salts like everyday and using a lot of them, he did like 6 packets of bath salts before he came in here." We all are like, no shit, he is off his rocker now. Then the guy like foams at the mouth, his eyes roll into the back of his head, and starts having full blown tonic-clonic seizures. Off course he pulled out the 1st IV, so now it is wrestle time, as all 4 of us RN's, the security guard, a tech from upstairs, and the ER Doc, are trying to get restraints on him, get an IV, and get some meds into him to stop his seizure and calm him down. In that process he was like a sweaty hulk, throwing the staff around every now and then, thank goodness none of us got hurt and the pt stayed on the cot. The bad thing, even after getting an IV, we started hitting him with our meds and he was not stopiping for anything. We had our sedation drip running wide open, we had given the first 3 line of anti seizure meds, had him intubated, restrained, and pumping anti-convulsants into this guy like crazy. Finally after like an hour and half of hitting him with enough drugs to sedate an elephant did he calm down. Of course we didn't have a Neurologist so we had to send him to Indianapolis. So if you ever want to hulk out, go into seizures that won't stop, and dang near have your heart beat so fast it explodes, get a hold of some bath salts :)

2nd: We got a call out that the half-way house for drug addicts and alcoholics was sending us a resident who had a seizure and passed out. He comes in, EMS says he is pretty out of it and won't respond, we get him moved over and me and Megan were trying to get him to talk to us. He looks at me with those crazy eyes and growls. Okay...not a good sign, Megan goes, "you ready for another rodeo?" and grins. All the pt does is growl at me and her. I step out to get something, and get yelled for another issue for the charge nurse, so I tell Megan to get some more help and I'll be back. I go over and start talking to a pt and pt's family when we start hearing howling and growling and stuff being thrown, and another RN is running around shutting all the doors. The family I was talking to suddenly realizes maybe their complaint isn't that big a deal, and I thank them and tell them I'll be back. I come out and see 4 police on the patient, 2 RN's, and 2 tech's, all trying to keep him in bed, he is growling still, sweating up a storm, and pretty much out of control. So we get him restrained, then get him sedated, but once again it took a ton of drugs to get him calmed down. We never found out for sure what had happened, we do know that the day before he had gone on a pass out of the facility and came back. The bath salts don't show up in our drug screen we have, but how he acted and how he had a seizure, and had tachycardia w/HTN, and an altered mental status, sure make you think he did that. We kept him at our facility and he went to ICU where they kept him pretty sedated till the next day. The police that helped us were great, they were in for some people getting DUI testing and came to help. One officer got urinated on, another made the comment, "no wonder they shot the guy in Florida who was eating that guy."

I'll have to write some more later, have 2 more bath salts to go.
Selby
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Reply #152 on: February 16, 2013, 02:13:01 PM

I'll have to write some more later, have 2 more bath salts to go.
You know, why the fuck does anyone do these things?  I've never seen or read ANYthing positive about the experience.
schild
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Reply #153 on: February 16, 2013, 02:22:20 PM

Some people legitimately don't deserve help - medicallly or otherwise.
Rendakor
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Reply #154 on: February 16, 2013, 09:52:36 PM

pt = patient?

"i can't be a star citizen. they won't even give me a star green card"
Segoris
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Reply #155 on: February 17, 2013, 07:58:31 AM

Crazy shit dude

And yeah, usually in the notes I have to read pt = patient and ct = client
kaid
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Reply #156 on: February 18, 2013, 02:02:23 PM

Yup bathsalts are up there with PCP for making insane rage monsters for people abusing them. The really nasty thing is it tends to overheat them so most will be wearing little/no clothing and sweating up a storm and having super rage strength and feeling 0 pain makes them really hard to gain control over to subdue so you can even start to try and help them.
Nebu
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Reply #157 on: February 22, 2013, 07:08:30 AM

pt = patient?

Yes.

This is what people do when they hate their life.  They escape it in any way possible.  Some use coke, some meth, some LSD... this guy was bath salts.

I expect to see this more and more as the wealth gap widens.  People see themselves trapped in a shitty life with no way out and start resorting to some serious escapism. 

"Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other."

-  Mark Twain
K9
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Reply #158 on: February 22, 2013, 08:36:57 AM

Sheet.

I've said it before, but you really need to write a book about all this Jimbo.

I love the smell of facepalm in the morning
Merusk
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Reply #159 on: February 22, 2013, 09:39:15 AM

I expect to see this more and more as the wealth gap widens.  People see themselves trapped in a shitty life with no way out and start resorting to some serious escapism. 

Hippie. If people aren't resourceful or cunning enough to drag themselves up to the level of HUMAN then we need to cull them from the herd somehow.  Social Darwinisim is best Darwinisim!   why so serious?

The past cannot be changed. The future is yet within your power.
Jimbo
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Reply #160 on: February 24, 2013, 02:22:04 PM

Sorry I get to typing and forget that I'm using lingo from my work.

Pt=patient
perp=perpetrator (usually someone under arrest for something that they bring in for clearance)
y.o.=year old (age of pt)

I think those are my main one's I use and forget to spell out. We are getting away from abbreviations, but I may right "sinus tach" instead of sinus tachycardia, or some others, but then it can be misleading if people can't understand it.

And we had another bath salts rodeo last night. I'm so glad the two RN's didn't get hurt, but they way this crazy lady tried to hurt them was nutty. I'm in the middle of 7 nights, tonight is night "5", so I'm gonna try and eat and grab some stuff for work, and maybe I can write some stuff this weekend.
Morat20
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Reply #161 on: February 24, 2013, 04:55:40 PM

bath salts? Is that a euphemism for something? or honest to god "hey, this shit looks good" bath salts from, you know, wherever people buy bath salts. The bath salts store.
MahrinSkel
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When she crossed over, she was just a ship. But when she came back... she was bullshit!


Reply #162 on: February 24, 2013, 05:07:05 PM

bath salts? Is that a euphemism for something? or honest to god "hey, this shit looks good" bath salts from, you know, wherever people buy bath salts. The bath salts store.
It's a legal dodge, 'legal highs' that are not technically banned substances sold as 'potpourri' or 'bath salts'.  If you see either for sale at a convenience store in a sketchy part of town, odds are that's what you're looking at.

--Dave

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Pennilenko
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Reply #163 on: February 24, 2013, 08:41:55 PM

Oddly enough if you put that shit in bath water you get a nice relaxing aromatherapy experience. Oh ho ho ho. Reallllly?

"See?  All of you are unique.  And special.  Like fucking snowflakes."  -- Signe
MahrinSkel
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When she crossed over, she was just a ship. But when she came back... she was bullshit!


Reply #164 on: February 24, 2013, 09:23:38 PM

The other factor is that as the enforcement catches up to one chemical, they create another variant.  Since testing and quality control tend to be a little shorted, each new variety can turn out to create...novel reactions, in people who had used the previous versions without unintended effects.

We have some organic chemists on the board, they can probably explain it better than I can.

--Dave

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Sir T
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Reply #165 on: February 25, 2013, 04:00:53 AM

Yeah, they called them "head shops" in Ireland, basically anything that was not SPECIFICALLY banned in legislation they thought they could sell. And when they did ban something they just altered the mixture and slapped a new name on it. They shut them all down last year. Seems the idea has migrated over to the states. FREEDOM!

Hic sunt dracones.
Lantyssa
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Reply #166 on: February 25, 2013, 08:54:05 AM

Dammit, Jim!  I'm a chemist, not a doctor!

Unsurprisingly, substances not intended for internal use cause strange reactions when eaten, inhaled, or injected.

Hahahaha!  I'm really good at this!
Nebu
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Reply #167 on: February 25, 2013, 11:07:04 AM

Just for clarification are we talking about "bath salts" the slang term for stuff containing methylenedioxypyrovalerone or the traditional bath salts containing magnesium sulfate? I assume the former as that's what is commonly abused.

"Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other."

-  Mark Twain
Signe
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Muse.


Reply #168 on: February 25, 2013, 11:30:17 AM

It makes you happy, horny and it smells like fish.  Seems silly to put it in your bath.  Also, I can't believe Nebu typed out that whole word!  How hot is that?

My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
ghost
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Reply #169 on: February 25, 2013, 03:11:40 PM

I thought bath salts contained any number of compounds, including PCP, LSD, methampetamine, ecstacy, etc.
Rasix
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Reply #170 on: February 26, 2013, 06:29:23 AM

Just for clarification are we talking about "bath salts" the slang term for stuff containing methylenedioxypyrovalerone or the traditional bath salts containing magnesium sulfate? I assume the former as that's what is commonly abused.

Wikipedia says the former. Glad this shit wasn't common when my uncles and cousins were in their drug abuse heydays.

-Rasix
Sir T
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Reply #171 on: March 13, 2013, 07:11:41 PM

This story needs to be told and I guess this thread is as good as any.

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/loaded-gun-in-vagina-687341

Look into these sweet brown eyes before reading this story...



Quote
MARCH 6--An Oklahoma woman arrested Monday on drug charges had a loaded handgun hidden in her vagina, according to police.  swamp poop  ACK!  Oh ho ho ho. Reallllly?

The weapon was discovered during a search of Christie Dawn Harris, 28, by a female officer with the Ada Police Department. According to a police report, the cop spotted the handle of the five-shot revolver "sticking out from" inside Harris, who is seen at right.

In a less shocking find, investigators also discovered plastic baggies containing methamphetamine lodged in the crack of Harris’s buttocks.  why so serious?

The Freedom Arms .22-caliber handgun was loaded with three live rounds and one spent shell, cops reported. As to where the weapon was recovered, the police report noted, “gun located in suspect vagina.”

At around 3:45 AM Monday, cops spotted Harris and another woman, Jennifer Delancy, inside a vehicle parked outside a closed restaurant. The women were in the front of the vehicle and “both seats were laid all the way back.” Asked by a cop if the car contained weapons or drugs, Harris, who was behind the wheel, answered that “she did not think there was anything.”

But when a drug dog alerted to both the driver and passenger sides of the Toyota Yaris, cops searched the vehicle and found meth, drug paraphernalia, a pistol, and a loaded magazine. Harris and Delancy were then arrested.

While being transported to jail, Harris “stated several times that she needed to go to the bathroom.”

At the lockup, Harris was directed to change out of her clothes into “jail clothing.” When directed to lower her underwear so that a female cop could check for contraband, Harris “advised that she was on her period and did not want to.”

Harris eventually complied with the cop’s order. “I observed at that time a wooden and metal item sticking out from her vagina area,” DRILLING AND WOMANLINESS reported Officer Kathy Unbewust, who added that she “pulled the item from her vagina, and found it to be a 5 shot revolver with rounds in the chamber.” 

As seen above, the police report includes a photo of the handgun seized from Harris, who is scheduled to be arraigned this afternoon on felony weapons and narcotics charges.

Spoilered due to sise


Happiness is a loaded gun...

Hic sunt dracones.
Der Helm
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Reply #172 on: March 14, 2013, 07:53:22 AM

Officer Kathy Unbewust
awesome, for real

That's German for Kathy "Subconscious"  awesome, for real

"I've been done enough around here..."- Signe
Sir T
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Reply #173 on: March 15, 2013, 04:15:45 PM

On a similar vein

Quote
Man tries to remove wedding ring by shooting it off his finger

A criminal complaint said Bradford police were called just before 9 p.m. March 2 and were met by Alfredo Malespini III, 31, who told officers he was "trying to get rid of his wedding ring" and decided to "shoot it off." The Bradford Era first reported the shooting on Friday.

The gunshot badly mangled Malespini's finger, but didn't remove the ring, police said.

At the time of the shooting in Bradford, which is near the New York border about 130 miles northeast of Pittsburgh, Malespini was employed as a lieutenant at the Federal Correctional Institution-McKean, a medium security prison a few miles away.

Hic sunt dracones.
Cyrrex
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Reply #174 on: March 17, 2013, 11:40:25 PM

I can't figure out what's worse...that he tried it in the first place, or that he went through with it and did not succeed.

"...maybe if you cleaned the piss out of the sunny d bottles under your desks and returned em, you could upgrade you vid cards, fucken lusers.." - Grunk
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