Disney buying Lucasfilm

[Fabricated]

The only Star Wars book I remember was Truce at Bakura which seemed okay but I vaguely remember the badguys as being weird lizard people who somehow imprison ghosts into their fighters, and a weapon called a "paddlebeamer" of which I could not visualize in my head.

Oh right; there's some awesome force-using wunderkind kid enslaved by the bad people who is built up and then killed at the end.

[HaemishM]

Other characters we should weep for include Beldorian the Splendid, the only Jedi hutt.
http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Beldorian_the_Splendid

Somebody needs to get stabbed over that picture and it sure as fuck ain't either Jedi Hutt or Jedi Leia.

[Nevermore]

Maybe they can retcon out midichlorians, too.

[Khaldun]

That one isn't even that hard to do--they could just make it a weird fucking obsessive crackpot idea that Qui-Gon had but that most of the Jedi knew was a fucking load of nonsense. Only takes invalidating a few scenes in the prequels where other Jedi use the word.

[Stormwaltz]

That one isn't even that hard to do--they could just make it a weird fucking obsessive crackpot idea that Qui-Gon had but that most of the Jedi knew was a fucking load of nonsense.

Qui Gon as Jedi Scientologist, walking around "auditing" people with his E-meter.

[Ingmar]

I'm pretty sure that a Jedi Hutt is only a few percentage points more ridiculous than Hutts are in the first place.

[Nevermore]

Jabba the Hutt was fine.  Where it all goes off the rails is when various writers decide to define an entire race based on one character.  Jabba is a gangster thus all Hutts are gangsters! 

[ajax34i]

Goes with every planet having only one climate across its entire surface.

[Cyrrex]

Paddlebeamers are obviously just like ping-pong paddles that you hold backwards!  The death lasers come out of the handle.  I want to say I am making a joke, but there is a itch somewhere in the back of my brain telling me that I have seen a lizard holding such a device somewhere.

Crystal Star was probably even worse.  I am blocking most of the details from memory.

[Tannhauser]

"Mofferfucker!"

GET THESE MOFFERFUCKING MOFFS OFF MY MOFFERFUCKING STAR DESTROYER!

Say that five times!

[Draegan]

If I ran Disney, as an advertising gimmick and an attempt to gain some "notoriety" with the fans, I would stop all sale of prequel movies, stop all production on prequel toys. Sell the existing stock (if there is any) and completely re do those movies at a later date. It's almost been 20 years since their release. Time for a re-write with an interesting story and a competent director (assuming that can be done).

[Tannhauser]

No.  The damage is done.  Lets keep them as a reminder and a warning for future generations.

[Paelos]

No.  The damage is done.  Lets keep them as a reminder and a warning for future generations.

We've redone spider man like 5 times, what makes this special?

[Cyrrex]

It shouldn't be different, but somehow it kind of feels different.  Comic book heroes get remade all the time, as par for the course.  This doesn't seem like something you can undo.  Trek can be redone like that because it doesn't have nearly the kind of cultural attachment (or something) that Star Wars has...and even so, I guess that had some people frothing all over their beards.

Maybe more time needs to pass.

[Tannhauser]

No.  The damage is done.  Lets keep them as a reminder and a warning for future generations.

We've redone spider man like 5 times, what makes this special?

You make a good point.  I just don't want them spending 'blood and treasure' on rebooting the first three when they can be making newer movies and expanding the universe.

Just no knee-sabers please!

[eldaec]

It shouldn't be different, but somehow it kind of feels different. 

People said exactly the same about Star Trek.

If you can reboot that you can sure as fuck reboot this.

"Mofferfucker!"

GET THESE MOFFERFUCKING MOFFS OFF MY MOFFERFUCKING STAR DESTROYER!

Say that five times!

This is a picture of some Moffs holding a Mofference in the purpose built Mofference Room aboard the Moffship.



You don't need to say this 5 times, because the EU authors already did.

[calapine]

Haha, oh god, that post naturally lead me to google what the posters for Poland were:

haha, the Polish language! 

Amerykański film fantastyczno

Imperium Kontratakuje

Powrót Jedi


*wipes tear from eyes*  

[Khaldun]

If they added female Moffs, they could be Grand Muffs.

[calapine]

If they added female Moffs, they could be Grand Muffs.

*bonk*

Don't be that guy. Remember, puns are the midichlorians of humor!

[Phildo]

And anyway, wouldn't they be Moffettes?

[Nevermore]

[HaemishM]

I will cut a bitch.

[eldaec]

Here's that elbow-sabre guy again, he can help you.



Clearly this is a younger version of the character who had only grafted 4 lightsbares into his body, I guess lightsabre grafts are like tattoos, some people just never get enough.

[HaemishM]

You just know his next one was either going to be unicorn or cock.

[Sjofn]

Haha, oh god, that post naturally lead me to google what the posters for Poland were:

haha, the Polish language! 

Amerykański film fantastyczno

Imperium Kontratakuje

Powrót Jedi


*wipes tear from eyes*  

That's the language of my forebears, I'll have you know!

Whenever Ingmar or proudft see something in Polish, they always look at me accusingly, like it's my fault Polish looks like someone took all the high point tiles from Scrabble, threw them on the floor, then picked them at random in order to construct words. I don't even speak Polish!

[eldaec]

Well that's what you would say...

[SurfD]

That one isn't even that hard to do--they could just make it a weird fucking obsessive crackpot idea that Qui-Gon had but that most of the Jedi knew was a fucking load of nonsense. Only takes invalidating a few scenes in the prequels where other Jedi use the word.

Eh, the more sensible thing to do would be to re-phrase it in the way I always look at midichlorians in my personal head-cannon.  I always re-interpret Qui-Gon's original statement to be that Midichlorians dont cause force sensitivity, rather they are simply some kind of microscopic space parasite that is attracted to it.  As such, measuring a midichlorian count could be used as a measuring stick of force-potential because the stronger you are, the more of them you attract.  They still exist, and can still be used for measuring potential ability in the force, just not for the reasons originally presented.  You dont have to retcon them out completely, just change their relationship to force users to something a little less batfuck stupid.   

[Cyrrex]

That sounds sorta reasonable, unfortunately the recent insider scoop is that episode 7 is going to be about an evil Sith who learns how creates a midichlorian based nose spray, which he then forces provides freely to the inhabitants of Korriban under the guise of a simple cold symptoms remedy.  Instant Sith Army.  Which will also be the title.

[eldaec]

Basically it's the plot from 'Batman'?

[K9]

That one isn't even that hard to do--they could just make it a weird fucking obsessive crackpot idea that Qui-Gon had but that most of the Jedi knew was a fucking load of nonsense. Only takes invalidating a few scenes in the prequels where other Jedi use the word.

Eh, the more sensible thing to do would be to re-phrase it in the way I always look at midichlorians in my personal head-cannon.  I always re-interpret Qui-Gon's original statement to be that Midichlorians dont cause force sensitivity, rather they are simply some kind of microscopic space parasite that is attracted to it.  As such, measuring a midichlorian count could be used as a measuring stick of force-potential because the stronger you are, the more of them you attract.  They still exist, and can still be used for measuring potential ability in the force, just not for the reasons originally presented.  You dont have to retcon them out completely, just change their relationship to force users to something a little less batfuck stupid.    

What are midichlorians? (skip to 9:07 if the link doesn't work correctly)

[Samprimary]

Midichlorians are basically Body Thetans and qui-gon was that one weird jedi who had fallen in with some fringe Jeditology teachings and was carrying around an E-Meter and individually pressing that belief. The rest of the jedi council probably rolled their eyes at it but mostly tolerated it. Right? Because, c'mon. Midichlorians.

[Merusk]

Most folks hate for midichlorians was summed up as, "It creates a genetic legacy for Force usage!"

In a series where Dad, His Son and Daughter were the biggest Force badasses in the universe. 

[Paelos]

Me dad's a muggle; Mam's a witch

[Yegolev]

In this house, the dislike of midichlorians is how it destroys the implied "train hard and by force of will you can accomplish anything" idea.  Now it is an infection or something.

[Khaldun]

You know, I keep trying to think about how elbow saber man looks when he's fighting. I keep thinking it's probably something like watching somebody do a particularly exaggerated square dance, all flying elbows and such.