The Hobbit (2012/2013)

[Merusk]

Gandalf also comes off as a bit of a twit for a good portion of the book that I remember as well, though.   After reading LOTR later, I always took a lot of the discrepancies between that Gandalf and that Dwarf (Gimli) to be because the Hobbit is the book written by Bilbo. 

[Ironwood]

Interesting.

If it had been done more in that style (I am Bilbo and I am telling you this story, rather than Tolkien doing it) it would have made more sense.  It would have just been a boastful wee hobbit.

I dunno about Gandalf though - He seems pretty hardcore in The Hobbit.  Trolls fucked.  Goblins escaped and then fucked.  Beorning dealt with.  Armies routed.

Heads.  Spikes.  Walls.

[Merusk]

His actions are hardcore, yes.  His language and mannerisms seem at-odds with the LOTR Gandalf.  At one point he's also accused of nearly hacking-off a dwarf's head in the middle of the goblin battle.  That doesn't mesh with the always-in-control guy who takes-down a Balrog seen in Mordor.

Bilbo's not a braggart, so he's not going to change a lot of the actions, but I don't see him above making folks he didn't generally get along with more buffons and the guy he  really liked more hobbit-like and approachable.

[rattran]

Can't we get to the core problem of the Hobbit? They cowardly murder the hero of the story half-way in, then the rest of the book is all about the angry and fractious division of his loot. I mean, Smaug had killed that annoying mountain full of dwarfs almost free of charge, pretty much just was hanging out not being a menace to anyone. Then some thief steals his stuff, wakes him up, taunts him, and arranges a hit by a known malcontent.

It's a tragedy. Now in far too many parts.

[murdoc]

The dwarves in The Hobbit are mostly the comic relief, though Thorin is generally portrayed as badass and Balin is generally competent and skilled at what he does.

I actually don't agree.  Until the Battle of the Five Armies, every single one of the dwarves comes across as useless to the point of self harm.  The stubborn nature is overplayed to the point that they actually make things worse in almost every situation and the greed on display is really silly.

The trolls fuck them up.  The goblins fuck them up.  The elves fuck them up and the Spiders fuck them up.  Then they spend ages hiding from a dragon and building a wall.

I think it NEEDS a massive rewrite to make them reasonable again for the movies and, frankly, giving them the different identities that they have in the trailer is a damn good first step.  I think anyone going in expecting The Hobbit that they read as a child can fuck off because it would be as stupid as Tom Bombadils Forest of Faggotry.

Bilbo ends up doing almost EVERYTHING himself and ALWAYS saving their useless arses.

I agree completely - I'm rereading "The Hobbit" right now since I really haven't read it in many a year and the movie will have to change the dwarves a LOT or else they will be total clownshoes and worse than anything that Gimli said or did in LotR.

[UnSub]

Tom Bombadils Forest of Faggotry.

... which became known as such due to all the bundles of sticks lying around.

[Ratman_tf]

The dwarves in The Hobbit are mostly the comic relief, though Thorin is generally portrayed as badass and Balin is generally competent and skilled at what he does.

I actually don't agree.  Until the Battle of the Five Armies, every single one of the dwarves comes across as useless to the point of self harm.  The stubborn nature is overplayed to the point that they actually make things worse in almost every situation and the greed on display is really silly.

The trolls fuck them up.  The goblins fuck them up.  The elves fuck them up and the Spiders fuck them up.  Then they spend ages hiding from a dragon and building a wall.

I think it NEEDS a massive rewrite to make them reasonable again for the movies and, frankly, giving them the different identities that they have in the trailer is a damn good first step.  I think anyone going in expecting The Hobbit that they read as a child can fuck off because it would be as stupid as Tom Bombadils Forest of Faggotry.

Bilbo ends up doing almost EVERYTHING himself and ALWAYS saving their useless arses.

The POINT of the Hobbit is "Tom Bombadil's Forest of Faggotry". More specifically, the fairy tale tone that Tolkien was shooting for. I'm sure the book will get changed, not just adapted but outright altered to appeal to the modern Transformers, Tits and Explosions audience. And it will probably make a ton of money for it. Hell, I think the only thing holding the Hobbit back from making even more money  is that they're not going to have any sexy supermodels in lingerie.

[Ironwood]

No, you're missing my point and misrepresenting me wildly.

This isn't so much a film version of The Hobbit (though it is) as it is LotR prequels.  That's been made clear.  Hell, that's been made clear by the mere fact that it's more than 1 Movie about 45 minutes long.

So the fairy tale trippy happy story has to go and be changed into 'Yeah, sure Bilbo had a marvellous adventure, but here's the real fucking story.'   Again, I'm ok with that.  I'm NOT going to be taking Elena to see it.  I expect some brutality and goblin head slicing.  Beorn ripping off heads.  Spikes.  Walls.

To take that to some kind of logical Hollywood conclusion where you're comparing any of the Transformers movies to this, well, it seems you're already getting your venom in first.  And that's fine too.  But don't expect me to listen to it, nor be terribly interested in your rabid shit storm of a whine thread later on.  It's goint to miss the mark on a number of things, I suspect, (see: LotR) but it's probably also going to be a rather grand adventure where Dwarves sing and, you know, fight.

I'm still ok with that.

Also, strangely, ok with Supermodels in lingerie.  I'm just not happy when they also appear to be fuck stupid and not terribly attractive, like in Transformers.

[VainEldritch]

Tom Bombadils Forest of Faggotry.

... which became known as such due to all the bundles of sticks lying around.

Yes, culture changes and the language with it.

In unguarded moments, statements in Lord of the Rings like Gandalf asking each member of the company to "carry a faggot", and Gandalf also "picking up a faggot" and "tossing another faggot on the fire" make me titter and then sigh.

[MahrinSkel]

All I know is that this has gone from my "Gotta see it opening weekend" list to the "Ehh, I'll wait for cable" list.  Like a lot of geeks, The Hobbit was the first Fantasy book I ever read (I think I was 7 or 8), and I'm just not that anxious to see it mixed with a bunch of Tolkien apocrypha, and certainly not willing to let it pull money out of my wallet three separate times.

--Dave

[Ironwood]

Fair enough.

[Cyrrex]

No, you're missing my point and misrepresenting me wildly.

This isn't so much a film version of The Hobbit (though it is) as it is LotR prequels.  That's been made clear.  Hell, that's been made clear by the mere fact that it's more than 1 Movie about 45 minutes long.

So the fairy tale trippy happy story has to go and be changed into 'Yeah, sure Bilbo had a marvellous adventure, but here's the real fucking story.'   Again, I'm ok with that.  I'm NOT going to be taking Elena to see it.  I expect some brutality and goblin head slicing.  Beorn ripping off heads.  Spikes.  Walls.

To take that to some kind of logical Hollywood conclusion where you're comparing any of the Transformers movies to this, well, it seems you're already getting your venom in first.  And that's fine too.  But don't expect me to listen to it, nor be terribly interested in your rabid shit storm of a whine thread later on.  It's goint to miss the mark on a number of things, I suspect, (see: LotR) but it's probably also going to be a rather grand adventure where Dwarves sing and, you know, fight.

I'm still ok with that.

Also, strangely, ok with Supermodels in lingerie.  I'm just not happy when they also appear to be fuck stupid and not terribly attractive, like in Transformers.

That's an interesting way of looking at it, I suppose.  Hadn't thought of it that way.

[Merusk]

All I know is that this has gone from my "Gotta see it opening weekend" list to the "Ehh, I'll wait for cable" list.  Like a lot of geeks, The Hobbit was the first Fantasy book I ever read (I think I was 7 or 8), and I'm just not that anxious to see it mixed with a bunch of Tolkien apocrypha, and certainly not willing to let it pull money out of my wallet three separate times.

--Dave

The "money out of my wallet" three separate times" is the only part really making me apprehensive at seeing it.  Then again I've never seen eye-to-eye with a lot of you on some of this stuff and never held it as some sacrosanct cherished untouchable thing.

[Ratman_tf]

No, you're missing my point and misrepresenting me wildly.

This isn't so much a film version of The Hobbit (though it is) as it is LotR prequels.  That's been made clear.  Hell, that's been made clear by the mere fact that it's more than 1 Movie about 45 minutes long.

So the fairy tale trippy happy story has to go and be changed into 'Yeah, sure Bilbo had a marvellous adventure, but here's the real fucking story.'   Again, I'm ok with that.  I'm NOT going to be taking Elena to see it.  I expect some brutality and goblin head slicing.  Beorn ripping off heads.  Spikes.  Walls.

I agree with you. I'm just not interested in Peter Jackson elaborating on a few notes Tolkien tossed into the appendixes of his books, because quite frankly the stuff that the films added out of whole cloth, like Aragon falling off his horse, and a fair bit of the dialogue and padding of the action scenes, I found to be pretty dull and unimaginative. YMMV.

To take that to some kind of logical Hollywood conclusion where you're comparing any of the Transformers movies to this, well, it seems you're already getting your venom in first.  And that's fine too.  But don't expect me to listen to it, nor be terribly interested in your rabid shit storm of a whine thread later on.  It's goint to miss the mark on a number of things, I suspect, (see: LotR) but it's probably also going to be a rather grand adventure where Dwarves sing and, you know, fight.

Man. Now I feel all obliged to watch the films and post a rabid Tolkien-fan tirade so you can not care. I don't need that kind of pressure! 

[murdoc]

I've already bought my tickets for opening day.

[Ironwood]

Man. Now I feel all obliged to watch the films and post a rabid Tolkien-fan tirade so you can not care. I don't need that kind of pressure! 

Heh.  There's no pressure;  it's going to happen anyway.

 

[Comstar]

I've already bought my tickets for opening day.

In IMAX.

[Tannhauser]

I'm sure as soon as the credits roll, the cinema hipsters will heave their Shelob-like bulks out of their befouled seats and tweet their bitter disappointment about Jackson raping their childhood.

[Korachia]

I'm sure as soon as the credits roll, the cinema hipsters will heave their Shelob-like bulks out of their befouled seats and tweet their bitter disappointment about Jackson raping their childhood.

aww but that was what I was gonna do... oh shi..

[Soln]

As long as they don't fucking talk through the film I don't care.  Seriously.   People spend so much time at home watching movies now, and on PC's and phones and while on the can, they have no idea of how loud or just how to behave in the cinema.  Srsly STFU with your theories and cross cultural references till you get home or at least to the lobby.

[Kitsune]

No, Bilbo only saves them about a third of the time.  Gandalf does the other two-thirds.

[palmer_eldritch]

Its only srs bsns because you are layering your adult perceptions onto it. When read by a seven year old, its a magical adventure.

This is also not just "The Hobbit."  It seems they are weaving in lots of the other backstory/concurrent story which was not explicitly in The Hobbit.  The Necromancer probably being a big part which is I believe only hinted at briefly in The Hobbit. 

They've said in interviews that a lot of it comes from the Lord of the Rings appendices. Supposedly, Tolkien went back and revised and added to the story of The Hobbit in those appendices. I haven't read them so no idea if that's true, but that's their explanation.

[Selby]

Supposedly, Tolkien went back and revised and added to the story of The Hobbit in those appendices. I haven't read them so no idea if that's true, but that's their explanation.

He did.  But he didn't exactly go into a load of details or explanations, more general outlining of the situation and included some listing of the major players involved.  Which is why part of me is worried that it's going to be embellished with dwarf tossing and shield surfing.  I also tend to feel it distracts from the story of the Hobbit, such that we're essentially getting 2 different story lines being told at the same time under the guise of one.  Time will tell, it may actually be well done for my tastes so I'll reserve judgment until it's out and in theaters.

[Morat20]

The masses had no idea who Gimli, Frodo and Aragorn were before the LotR movies and I would guess most of them still don't.

I can't ever remember if it was Merry or Pippin in Lost.

[Ironwood]

Yeah, they're both English, right ?

 

[Morat20]

Yeah, they're both English, right ?

 

It's all the tweed. You guys all look alike.

[Numtini]

Missed opening day tickets, Real3d on Saturday.

[Khaldun]

We are seeing the midnight show on the 13th and keeping the 12-year old out of school the next day. Responsible parenting FTW.

[Lantyssa]

It'd be irresponsible to send the kid to school after letting them not get a full night of sleep.  Good on you.

[Soln]

I shall wait 2 weeks and change till froth subsides and then try a daily show or late night show to avoid the kids.   

[MuffinMan]

Doesn't look like any showings are sold out here. Now to decide between 48fps 3D, standard 3D, standard 2D, IMAX 3D or IMAX 2D. Going to see a movie sure is difficult these days.

[Selby]

Going to see a movie sure is difficult these days.

Which is why I don't go very often.  I can't see 3D movies easily and the sheer volume of the experience puts me off of the giant IMAX setups, so waiting for it to come out on regular DVD is my easiest option.

[MahrinSkel]

I don't get the attraction of IMAX.  Unless you get one of less than a dozen seats in the sweet spot, you can replicate the experience by going to any stadium-seating theater and sitting in the first three rows.  There are more fun ways to get a sore neck.

--Dave

[Tannhauser]

An early reviewer calls Radagast the Jar Jar Binks of this movie.  Forgot the link.  I think I've blocked it out of my memory.

NOW I'm worried.   

[eldaec]

I don't get the attraction of IMAX.  Unless you get one of less than a dozen seats in the sweet spot, you can replicate the experience by going to any stadium-seating theater and sitting in the first three rows.  There are more fun ways to get a sore neck.

--Dave

Depends on the imax, most are fake reduced size digital bullshit imax these days. But assuming you get a real one, image I find image contrast and quality is far better, needs a film shot for IMAX though.

And I have no issue booking ahead a couple of weeks for a good seat, which helps.

For hobbit I'm not sure whether I'll bother. Even the London southbank imax has succumbed to the abomination that is 3d.