The Hobbit (2012/2013)

[Selby]

Johny Cee has it spot on for me.  Fellowship was the best of the 3 and the changes that some people nerdrage over in it are actually changes that really helped with the pacing and preventing boredom from creeping in that I totally understand.  Two Towers was a bit too heavy on the battle vs. some editing changes that could have helped it out and Return has similar issues.  But even having read the books I appreciate them all and really enjoy them and those friends of mine who never read the books loved them all.  We're doing a LotR all-day-fest next week of director's cuts and drinking, so that's a good time ;-)

The Hobbit... I'm not sure it will capture the magic of the book for me and that's not really the director's fault.  It was just a book I truly loved and read like 10 times in a certain part of my life and even reading it years later still brings me back to a happier time.  It's got a lot to live up to, but I have to make sure I don't hate the movie because it doesn't live up to my imagination and memory.  It looks pretty well done, if it was the same quality as the LotR movies, I'll likely be satisfied and not feel like I wasted any time or money on them ;-)

[Johny Cee]

Motherfucker is dead to me because he didn't put Tom Bombadil in.  Movie will be stillborn. 

About Bombadil: 

Google the Stephen Colbert interview with Neal Gaiman.  Bombadil comes up, and Gaiman thought the character was poor and out of place.  Colbert has an  response.

[MahrinSkel]

The directors cut of Return helps it out quite a bit.  But its over 4.5 hours long.

I agree Return was the weakest, but mainly due to editing issues (which is why the directors cut works much better).  I still largely enjoyed it, and thought the movie was merely good, not great, like the others.

This looks great, and I'm looking forward to it very much.

Also, there are two types of people in the world.  People who like Tom Bombandil, and people who aren't fucked in the head.

I miss the March of the Ents much more than Tom Bombadil (who was a jarring bit of comedy relief even in the book).  Is the March in the Directors Cut?

--Dave

[Teleku]

Err, wasn't the March of the Ents in the Two Towers?

[Cyrrex]

I liked Tom Bombadil a lot in fellowship, but can easily understand why they cut it from the movies.  It isn't actually a very important part of the story, in the grand scheme.  Would I have like to see it?  Sure.  But they have to make some choices to get these things down to even a remotely reasonable theater  length.

I was much more bothered by the inflated role of Arwen, to be honest.

[stu]

I liked Bombadil. Those fucking Hobbits were pissing their britches without Gandalf and hadn't met the Strider yet. Hell, one of the Hobbits even made up an excuse to kick it at Frodo's new digs and they all apologized for him. Bombadil gave them the strength they needed not to turn tail before they even knew which way was east. Plus, his wife is a fox.

[Sheepherder]

Err, wasn't the March of the Ents in the Two Towers?

It was fucked with for no apparent reason.  In the movies Treebeard explains to the Hobbits at length how he doesn't give a fuck about the war and has no beef with Sauron or Saruman, until he just so happens to notice dozens of motherfucking acres of missing forest while escorting the Hobbits out of the woods.  Worst treeherder ever.

I liked Tom Bombadil a lot in fellowship, but can easily understand why they cut it from the movies.  It isn't actually a very important part of the story, in the grand scheme.  Would I have like to see it?  Sure.  But they have to make some choices to get these things down to even a remotely reasonable theater  length.

I was much more bothered by the inflated role of Arwen, to be honest.

Fuck Bombadil and Elf dude who appears once.  WHERE IS THE MOTHERFUCKING WIGHT?  The only action for that stretch of the movie are Wraiths stumbling around like senseless dipshits and their stabbing of a motherfucking bed.  They even cut Frodo getting witchslapped at the ford.

[Merusk]

A friend shared this and it seemed relevant.

http://g.co/maps/24u56

 

[Special J]

Add one more vote for:  SQUEEEEE!!!!

Thank you.

[Cheddar]

A friend shared this and it seemed relevant.

http://g.co/maps/24u56

 

I do not get it.

[Soln]

Holiday Season Saved! 

[Tannhauser]

Why does Thorin seem taller than the other dwarves?  Is that from the books?

[Reg]

I noticed that too. He really doesn't look like a dwarf at all. He's too tall and his features are too fine.

[Ironwood]

I LIKE the Dwarf variety.  A Lot.

And Thorin looks like just the kind of bad motherfucker that would cut down a tree once his shield was done in.

Though I agree he could be a little older.

A little.

[Arthur_Parker]

Why does Thorin seem taller than the other dwarves?

More action figure sales.

[Merusk]

A friend shared this and it seemed relevant.

http://g.co/maps/24u56

 

I do not get it.

Read the walking directions on the left.

[Ironwood]

Also, bear in mind that we did this same shit before LotR too :  Comments about sizes not being right, only to find that the finished product had put some serious fucking work in to make sure the scale of the Fellowship was bang on.

I'm quite sure we'll have dwarves that are short, hobbits that are shorter and Beornings that are fucking huge.

[Special J]

There's a shot in the trailer of Gandalf, Bilbo and a few dwarves.  Sizes seem right there.  I like the look of the dwarves but yeah, Thorin seems a little too 'fine', but not enough for me to nerdrage over.

[shiznitz]

The Hobbit overall is a tighter story than the LOTR trilogy so it should make an easier and smoother movie conversion.

[Draegan]

Yeah I squeed in my pants.

[Soln]

I LIKE the Dwarf variety.  A Lot.

Fawk ya.  Jackson tweaks things in ways I never anticipate. Great stuff.

[Samwise]

Gimli was just 'stereotypical D&D dwarf', so I am glad to see that the giant crew of dwarves has enough variety that we'll be able to tell them apart.

The thing in the trailer that really made me squee, though, was Thorin singing.  In Tolkien, people sing.  I acknowledge that it's hard to do a bunch of musical numbers in a movie without just coming off as goofy, but it's really hard for it to feel like Middle Earth if there's no music.

[Tannhauser]

I agree.  Thorin singing felt very Tolkien-like.  I mean I don't want a musical, but if they don't do at least a couple of bars of "Chip the glasses and crack the plates" I'll be disappointed.

Hrm may have start re-reading it.  My Precious.

[Sheepherder]

Gimli was just 'stereotypical D&D dwarf', so I am glad to see that the giant crew of dwarves has enough variety that we'll be able to tell them apart.

Tolkien made the stereotypical dwarf.  So no, that's exactly what you're getting.  It's just we have some hope that Jackson won't make every one of them into comic relief.

[Ironwood]

Not sure.  You'll probably get Fatty Bombur being a laughing stock (hell, he was in the trailer) and I would imagine you can't really cast Nesbitt as a dwarf and expect him not to ham it up.

Beyond that, it should be ok.  Bear in mind that Hobbit actually had the Dwarves be much 'funnier' than Gimli was ever meant to be, so it might....not be for you.

[Johny Cee]

Not sure.  You'll probably get Fatty Bombur being a laughing stock (hell, he was in the trailer) and I would imagine you can't really cast Nesbitt as a dwarf and expect him not to ham it up.

Beyond that, it should be ok.  Bear in mind that Hobbit actually had the Dwarves be much 'funnier' than Gimli was ever meant to be, so it might....not be for you.

As long as we get to see them drop a wall and come out slaughtering at the Battle of Five Armies, I'll be okay.  Thorin was a pompous ass, but that dude knew you come back with your shield or on it.  And if you lose your shield, you hack off a giant oak limb and use that.


From the trailer, it looks like we're going to get an extended "Gandalf in Dol Guldar" section, unless the shots of Gandalf were from the Goblin King's cave.

[Ironwood]

The simple fact of Galadriel and, you know, 2 films worth, suggests we're going in to the Sauron stuff in depth.

Which is nice.

[Muffled]

Not sure.  You'll probably get Fatty Bombur being a laughing stock (hell, he was in the trailer)...

Bombur was mainly the butt of jokes in the book as well, to be fair.  Nearly any time his name was mentioned 'haha Bombur is so fat!' came shortly after.

[Johny Cee]

The simple fact of Galadriel and, you know, 2 films worth, suggests we're going in to the Sauron stuff in depth.

Which is nice.

That will be the Thrain (Thorin's dad) and the dwarf ring stuff, which should be awesome.  Jackson really hit the Ring stuff out of the park, especially in Fellowship.  You KNEW that pretty little thing was pure concentrated evil.

[Ratman_tf]

The Hobbit overall is a tighter story than the LOTR trilogy so it should make an easier and smoother movie conversion.

Jackson is going to pad it out with stuff from the appendixes to make two films and link it more strongly with the ring trilogy.

Which is a shame, because when the films were following Tolkien (and Bakshi's version) they were sometimes very good, but when making up their own stuff, (Oh noes! Aragorn fell off a cliff!)  it got pretty retarted. And in order to flesh out the appendix material, they're gonna have to make up a lot of shit.

[Sir T]

Err, wasn't the March of the Ents in the Two Towers?

Nope, It was fucked with to make the Ents pacifists and pants on heads retarded, that were going tro wander off and go extinct because that was "Their way" till Merry tricked him with the weakest trick ever and Treebeard got shocked that the Orcs were *shock* cutting down trees. I literally facepalmed.

Look the Fellowship was a great movie, and for that I didn't care about the changes to the book. I enjoyed 2 scenes from the Two towers; Gandalf and the balrog kicking the shit out of one another and the Ents using the Orcs as footballs. As for the rest I felt I was literally staring at my watch I was so bored. There was no acting on screen or personality in the characters, everyone looked bored out of their minds. And frankly the more interesting parts of the movie were the least interesting of the book, Frodo, Sam and Gollum getting rained on for weeks. And ROTK was not much better, but at least I was expecting no character and pants on head retardedness from the movie this time so it was not such a kick to my stomach. And Gimli being turned into the comic relief was stupid as hell.

Frankly I would rather watch the cartoon version than the last 2 films. Like I said the first movie was great, I own the extended edition. The other 2 can go rot.

As for the Hobbit, I'm not holding my breath on this and probably wont bother going to see it. I'm sure Jackson will include Xena the Warrior Princess or someone similar.

[Sheepherder]

Beyond that, it should be ok.  Bear in mind that Hobbit actually had the Dwarves be much 'funnier' than Gimli was ever meant to be, so it might....not be for you.

It annoys me when Jackson fucks with things that don't need to be fucked with.  Like adding, rewriting, or embellishing a shitton of scenes to add a fourth comic relief in a movie with nine regular characters.

[MuffinMan]

Ask the riff raff who take issue with Peter Jackson.

I bow to you, oh prophet.

[Sheepherder]

It's also a safe bet that at some point in a LotR thread someone will show up to point out that Jackson and co refraining from scrawling a giant cock on Aragorn's cheek as evidence of his superb directorial skills (as it would have ruined the gravitas of the piece).

A more nuanced view is that LotR is a terrible interpretation of the books exceeded in ineptitude only by every other film version ever made.  I submit in furtherance of this argument that without question the worst part of the books is all of the motherfucking elf wankery, and Jackson DIALED THAT HORSESHIT UP.

[Samwise]

Which is a shame, because when the films were following Tolkien (and Bakshi's version) they were sometimes very good, but when making up their own stuff, (Oh noes! Aragorn fell off a cliff!)  it got pretty retarted. And in order to flesh out the appendix material, they're gonna have to make up a lot of shit.

Ah, there we are, now that you've reminded me of that I can feel the old bile returning.  Thank you for that; it really unsettles me to feel optimistic about things.