Chalk up another one for Scientology.

[Yegolev]

Christopher "Rayden = Mel Brooks" Lambert and a_baldwin0035?  Pass.

[Shockeye]

The Baldwin dies, if that helps.

[Yegolev]

It did help when a Baldwin got a cig in the eye in The Usual Suspects.  Hmmm.

[Furiously]

Diane Lane is stunning.  I think it's her smile.

[Shockeye]

Say hello to baby Xenu!

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes expecting
The couple has been dating since mid-April of this year

Chris Pizzello / AP file

NEW YORK - Let the couch-jumping begin: Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are expecting a baby.

Holmes’ pregnancy was reported Wednesday by People magazine. The couple have been dating since April and became engaged in June.

“Tom and Katie are very excited, and the entire family is very excited,” Lee Anne DeVette, Cruise’s spokeswoman, told People.

It would be Holmes’ first child. Cruise has two children, Connor, 10, and Isabella, 12, from his marriage to Nicole Kidman.

No further details were available. DeVette added that Holmes, 26, “has never felt better.”

Cruise, 43, is now shooting “Mission” Impossible 3.”

See, people, in vitro fertilization works.

[WayAbvPar]

I can't remember when such a hottie has gotten so unappealing so quickly. It took Linsday Lohan months and months of starvation and cocaine. Tara Reid took years to drink herself into a pathetic former hottie. All Katie had to do was hook up with the uber-Scientologist and carry his mutant seed.

[HaemishM]

I wonder if Katie will take post-partum drugs.

[Shockeye]

I wonder if Katie will take post-partum drugs.

I doubt it as long as she gets her regular doses of Thetan.

[voodoolily]

Wouldn't it be even funnier, though, if she didn't take meds and instead drowned her satan-spawn?

[Shockeye]

Wouldn't it be even funnier, though, if she didn't take meds and instead drowned her satan-spawn?

It'll end up being a dwarf with hammer toes.

[voodoolily]

When I read that I immediately thought of Strazos' avatar, but with a deformed baby instead of iPod guy.

[Jeff Kelly]

Serious question, who is the father?

I was under the impression that Tom is sterile and cannot procreate. I thought that was why he and Nicole adopted kids rather than father their own.

[Ironwood]

Serious question, who is the father?

I was under the impression that Tom is sterile and cannot procreate. I thought that was why he and Nicole adopted kids rather than father their own.

You don't understand Tom's Sperm count.  He does.

[penfold]

Serious question, who is the father?

I was under the impression that Tom is sterile and cannot procreate. I thought that was why he and Nicole adopted kids rather than father their own.

I was under the impressions Tom's sperm was being wasted up men's bottoms, rather than heading towards ovaries, fallopian tubes n the like.

[Soln]

do we know if it's not a clone?

[Nevermore]

It's a giant Thetan.

[AOFanboi]

Mor' assimilashun into the fold.

Pregnant actress Katie Holmes has fired her publicist Leslie Sloane-Zelnick after nine years together, and has hired her fiance Tom Cruise's sister as her new spokesperson.

How fricking hard is it for those airheads with a 90210 zip code to realize that the CoS is nothing more than a tax shelter set up by a madman fighting professionals who told him how mad he was?

[Murgos]

If it was just a tax dodge I don't think anyone would have a problem with it...

[Ironwood]

Apart from the IRS.  Obviously.

[Paelos]

Apart from the IRS.  Obviously.

Yeah and popular support for fucking the IRS is minimal. 

[Soln]

How old was Nicole?  As someone starting to think about this, there is a concern for woman over 30/35 with pregnancy, no? 

[Shockeye]

There is some concern over 35 for a woman, but recent research has shown that there's just as much if not more concern for older fathers as well. Children have a higher risk for birth defects from older fathers than older mothers.

[Merusk]

Really?  That's a new one to me.  I'd always heard the woman was of more concern because the eggs are as old as a woman, while a man keeps absorbing and reproducing new sperm.

[Shockeye]

Really?  That's a new one to me.  I'd always heard the woman was of more concern because the eggs are as old as a woman, while a man keeps absorbing and reproducing new sperm.

But as the man ages the sperm he produces can have chromosomal breaks.

[Ironwood]

Well, we've all got to take a rest sometime, even chromosomes.

[shiznitz]

I wish us men would just hit a wall at which our sperm are 100% ineffective with 100% reliability. Then I could skip this whole vasectomy thing next year. Three kids = done!

/shiver

[Nevermore]

What, only three?

[WayAbvPar]

What, only three?

Yeah, that is just crazy. Do you really need 16 fucking kids? How do you even care for that many? How about spending quality time alone with every one? That is just crazy.

I am secretly wondering if the parents are related. The father's name IS Jim-Bob...

[Merusk]

I went to school and later worked with a guy who wanted 10 kids.  His wife agreed with him and last time I saw him they were working on #5.  That was almost 3 years ago now, so if everything's on track they're closing in on 8 right now.

They were both very devout Mormons, though, so that explains a bit of it.  Why on earth he went into Architecture with plans on supporting a family that large is beyond me, however.

[voodoolily]

Why on earth he went into Architecture with plans on supporting a family that large is beyond me, however.

Well if it was good enough for Mike Brady it's good enough for him.

[RhyssaFireheart]

each child has a name beginning with the letter "J": Joshua, 17; John David, 15; Janna, 15; Jill, 14; Jessa, 12; Jinger, 11; Joseph, 10; Josiah, 9; Joy-Anna, 8; Jeremiah, 6; Jedidiah, 6; Jason, 5; James, 4; Justin, 2; Jackson Levi, 1; and now Johannah.

*gag*

Two of my brothers were friends with a family that did that same thing, ironically with "J" names as well.  Couple of the boys had nicknames that didn't start with "J" though, don't blame them.  And that mom needs some help, IMO.  Although, to be really crude, she's either stretched out to high heaven or someone does their Kegle (sp?) exercises every 5 minutes.

I didn't know about older fathers having a higher risk of birth defects.  I knew that a woman having her first child over the age of 30 could have more problems, and then the older you get it's riskier.  I can't imagine wanting to have a kid over 40 in the first place.  You're settled into your routine, why mess things up with a kid?  Besides the fact that by the time the rugrat is 20 and solidly in college, you are going to be retired and look like the grandparent instead of the parent.  Ick.

[Abagadro]

I thought families with eleventybillion kids with names all starting with one letter was exclusively a Utah phenomenon.