NFL 2012

[Johny Cee]

Watch a game he coaches for ten minutes. You can't avoid seeing him crying into his clipboard.

Didn't see Thursday's game, but I was complaining about this a couple pages ago.  Any flag comes out or call goes against him and you see him jawing on the sidelines like the refs are personally trying to take the food out of his kids' mouths.  My favorite is the challenge flag just to show how pissed he is, which he then loses.

It feels like theater in an attempt to influence either the audience or the refs.

[sickrubik]

I miss Shanahan trying to kill everyone with mind bullets. That's about the only thing I miss, mind you.

[WayAbvPar]

Watch a game he coaches for ten minutes. You can't avoid seeing him crying into his clipboard.

Didn't see Thursday's game, but I was complaining about this a couple pages ago.  Any flag comes out or call goes against him and you see him jawing on the sidelines like the refs are personally trying to take the food out of his kids' mouths.  My favorite is the challenge flag just to show how pissed he is, which he then loses.

It feels like theater in an attempt to influence either the audience or the refs.

Judging from his conference calls with the opposing team's media (where he just mumbles a syllable or two, and never offers any follow ups or actual info), he is just a miserable fuck all round. A petulant child.

[Trippy]

He does that to the people covering the Niners too.

[Sjofn]

I miss Shanahan trying to kill everyone with mind bullets. That's about the only thing I miss, mind you.

Coughlin is the cootiest coot out there. He has mind bullets, he has screaming obscenities, he has an amazing color-changing face, and he sometimes just looks like someone's pissy great uncle wandered onto the sideline and picked up a headset. He has it all, baby.

[Paelos]

Haha the Giants are so lucky. 

Who doesn't cover Cruz with the game on the line? SHANANAHANAHAN

[Malakili]

It was all skill, totally.

[Tannhauser]

I guess I'm getting old, because I  the old Tampa Bay 'creamsicle' uniforms.  Also, a thrilling end.  Freeman throws for 400+ yards?? How shit IS the 'taints defense?  What a fucked up ending.  On a penalty.

Good to see the Titans righting the ship.  The Jake Locker era is not quite here as Hasselbeck looks like a Tennessee Stud. Hope Locker doesn't get a sprain from holding the clipboard.  Chris Johnson runs for 195yds.  Against the Bills, but hey we'll take it. I'm not ready to declare CJ back to form though.   If the Titans can now fix their *ahem* POROUS defense, they might actually get a Wild Card. 

[Fordel]

The only reason that game (Giants/RedSkins) was even close, was because of all those 4th down conversions barely squeaking by, constantly.


The Giants Defense figured out the Redskins QB before the Redskins figured out you should cover Cruz.


No one ever remembers to cover Cruz though.

[ghost]

Randall Cobb fucking shit up again for the Packers.   

And yes, the creamsicle uniforms are the best ever created in any sport.

[JWIV]

Wooo boy the Ravens.  Thankfully, with my wife off for a spa day as a belated birthday present, that shitfest of a game made it easy to decide to be a responsible parent and take my kids to the park instead.

[Sjofn]

ELITE

[HaemishM]

Houston and Baltimore. Well I guess we know who the best team in the AFC is. Not that there was really a question in my mind. The Ravens defense is OLD and now it's OLD AND HURT. A lot. They couldn't stop anything yesterday even with Suggs back. But what's worse for them is their offense. Joe Flacco is good in Baltimore but he is DEATH on the road and the Texans proved it. The Ravens better hope they somehow sew up the #1 spot in the AFC because they are not going to beat Houston on the road unless Schaub is out again. The game was over before the second quarter.

New England and the Jets. Guess what? Both these teams are TERRIBLE. The Patriots offense is good but it ain't that good. The Pats defense is worse. They absolutely cannot stop the run. Luckily for them, the Jets are convinced that Mark Sanchez is a starting caliber NFL QB and continue to try to prove it to everyone. Perfect example came in the 4th quarter. Pats are up 23-17. The Jets have moved the ball mostly with runs, including a few key 3rd and 1 runs by Greene. The announcers keep pointing out that he's 6 for 6 on the year at 3rd and 1's. They get to the 4-yard line with a 3rd and 1. Do they run Greene, which is apparently a surefire first down? No. Do they even bother to bring Tebow in for a QB sneak or a wildcat bumble to get the first down. No. No, they put it in Sanchez's hands and their no-name receiver can't get enough separation on a slant to get the ball. Kick a field goal, lose in OT. The Pats may be the 3rd best team in the AFC but that ain't saying much. They have no real pass rush to speak of, can't stop the run and are horribly inconsistent.

Tennessee and Buffalo. I caught the last quarter of this game once they switched off the domination of the Texans. The Buffalo Bills should fire their D coordinator because as much money as they spent on the defensive side of the ball this year, they should be at least a top 10 defense. Instead, they can't stop ANYBODY. Hasselback looks like a world beater instead of the beaten up vet he is because the Bills can't cover anybody. And will someone tell Ryan Fitzpatrick his guys are the ones wearing blue jerseys? He has got to get the INT's down or they won't have a shot at the playoffs. Yes, they still have a shot at the playoffs, that's how bad the AFC is.

The Saints defense is perhaps the worst in the league. Luckily they have Drew Brees because otherwise, they'd be 0-6. Tampa's Orange Crush unis are clearly superior to their modern versions but the team still sucks.

Green Bay called, and they said, "Greg Who?" I expect Jennings will be gone next year, because Randall Cobb is #1/#2 level of talent. If James Jones continues to play like he has, I don't care when Jennings's groin heals because we don't need him. And Jordy Nelson really is #1 caliber, at least when Rodgers is on his game. Sure, it was against the Rams. Their next game is against Jacksonville with the potential of no Jones-Drew AND Chad Henne at QB. So let's chalk that up as a win.

Minnesota gets an ugly win. Ponder only has 58 yards passing? Well, when you have ALL-DAY PETERSON running behind you, I guess you don't need to throw the ball. Ponder has had better games and I suppose it's a measure of how good the Cardinals pass defense is that he had such a bad game. Too bad Arizona has no QB. Whether it's Kolb or Skelton under center, that team is still going to struggle. Both QB's have taken a combined 35 SACKS this year in 7 games. 5 sacks per game is not going to get many wins. The only good defenses they've played against are Seattle and Philly and apparently Minnesota (who are tied with Arizona for 3rd in sacks this year).

RGIII is so the real deal. I'm disappointed that game wasn't on my TV, it sounds like a fun one. I expect that next year, when the Skins have another draft under their belt and a year of seasoning on Griffin and Morris and a chance to fix their defense, they are going to be scary good. That division is going nowhere but down. Right now, it's the Giants division to lose because the Cowboys and Eagles are both horribly inconsistent and overrated. At least the Skins have an excuse to be 3-4.

[01101010]

I was very pleased to see Brandon Weeden look the part of an NFL QB - especially after his first couple games and ESPECIALLY after T.Rich goes out.  Now, can we please FOR THE LOVE OF GOD GET SOMEONE WHO CAN FUCKING CATCH IT?!?!! Seriously, there is some kind of plague with the Browns' receivers and I blame Braylon for starting that shit up. Little and now Gordon dropping big throws. Amazing that the Browns could have/SHOULD HAVE A.J. Greene out there.... Thanks Heckert and Co. Gordon might still be good, but I can't recall receivers outside of the Browns with horrible drops like this, aside from an occasional Dez story.

[sickrubik]

Green Bay called, and they said, "Greg Who?" I expect Jennings will be gone next year, because Randall Cobb is #1/#2 level of talent. If James Jones continues to play like he has, I don't care when Jennings's groin heals because we don't need him. And Jordy Nelson really is #1 caliber, at least when Rodgers is on his game. Sure, it was against the Rams. Their next game is against Jacksonville with the potential of no Jones-Drew AND Chad Henne at QB. So let's chalk that up as a win.

Hey, the Rams WERE 3-0 at home, with wins over Arizona, Seattle and Washington. Not the best team, obviously, but they've played well at home, which only reinforces how good the Packers SHOULD have been and possibly ARE.

The rest of their schedule has the opportunity of being rough with two games each with the vikings and Detroit to go. But they also have 5 home games, including jaguars, titans and cardinals.

With how crazy the NFC race seem to be turning into, and how well Minnesota is playing, I worry about them making the playoffs.

[Draegan]

Haemish, going into the game last night, the Patriots offense was the best in the league with YPG and scoring.

[HaemishM]

Some of that is likely because of the curbstomping they gave to Buffalo (wasn't it like 600 passing yards and 52 points?) and Tennessee. I'm not saying they aren't good at times, but they are inconsistent. That team should have been able to do more than they did in the 4th quarter against a Jets team with no Revis, especially at home. No question they can light it up, but on the whole, I don't think they are as good as their numbers might indicate.

I worry about the Pack making the playoffs too, but I am buoyed by my opinion that the Vikings are not as good as their record indicates and the Bears are inconsistent as well - plus the Lions seem deadset on tanking this season.

[Ingmar]

Yeah I'm pretty sure games against Buffalo don't count.

[Paelos]

The Patriots haven't had a decent pass defense since 2009. It's no shock they've never won the big game in that stretch.

Let's get one thing straight. If the Jets catch one pass that hits the guy IN THE FUCKING HANDS WIDE OPEN on a 3rd down conversion, that game is over. No amount of Brady can overcome being down by 7 with 10s on the clock. Here's the Patriots pass defense ranking by year:

2012 - 31st
2011 - 31st
2010 - 30th
2009 - 12th

[HaemishM]

Yeah, that guy dropping that particular pass was just insane. Wasn't that their first round pick?

[HaemishM]

Watched the Bears/Lions game last night. Dear God, this Lions team is a trainwreck. They won last year with the pass and no run. They apparently thought LeShoure would give them that running game this year. They were wrong. Both he and Bell seem to have a case of the fumbilitis. Not only that but it seems like it just doesn't matter. The Bears were practically giving them the running lanes and the Lions couldn't capitalize on it - Leshoure gets only 63 yards, but more importantly, the running didn't seem to open up their playaction to the long ball or anything else. The Bears just weren't afraid of it. Megatron gets doubled all night because they have no second threat. Their TE's don't provide any sort of threat down the seam like a Jimmy Graham or Jermichael Finley, and their slot receivers aren't even worth mentioning. And oh yeah, they lost Burelson for the rest of the season with a broken leg. They also can't pass protect Stafford against a good rush.

Their special teams are fucking awful. How do you muff 3 punts in one game and still get put back there? The first drive of the second half, their defense stops the Bears for a 3 and out and they immediately lose the momentum by muffing a punt.

Their defense has such a good pass rush and is so good at stuffing the run, but they cannot fucking cover ANYBODY. I don't see how the issues like no secondary offensive weapons and shitty DB's didn't get addressed in the offseason. Yes, they had cap issues but surely they could have done something.

[Paelos]

Watching the Lions try to get a third down conversion is like watching the cast of Jersey Shore try to do calculus.

[ghost]

Suh did a good job of trying to stick Cutler's head up his ass.  That was worth seeing. 

[Nebu]

Watching the Lions try to get a third down conversion is like watching the cast of Jersey Shore try to do calculus.

[Segoris]

 



Image is from this Deadspin item.

[WayAbvPar]

That has to be seriously pissing the Ginger Hammer off. Good. Fuck him.

[Surlyboi]

They send Bill Belichick all the way to London and he still looks like a homeless masshole.

[MuffinMan]

Go home, Romo. You're drunk.

[Paelos]

The fact the press still continues to call Romo great makes me wonder if they are watching the same games I am.

Also, I want Dez Bryant to go away and never come back to the NFL. He's a petulant, braindead child.

[Fordel]

The Giants/Cowboys game was way more interesting then it had any business being. The Giants offense was just snoozing the entire game.

[ghost]

I love Tony Romo.   

[Sjofn]

[HaemishM]

So apparently there are a good things happening in Miami that only have a few possible explanations. Either 1) Joe Philbin is a really good fucking coach or 2) Ryan Tannehill is a better QB than everyone rated him. Granted, Miami's schedule hasn't been grueling, but this is a team that is 2 OT field goals away from a 6-1 record. I'm staring to lean towards #1 because Tannehill got hurt yesterday and Matt Moore did well. Perhaps part of the reason Aaron Rodgers had a tough time early in the year was because Philbin wasn't his QB's coach anymore because Miami has NO ONE to throw to and yet their offense has been pretty decent. As for the Jets, FUCK THEM. I'm so happy to see this team self-destruct. They trade for Tebow then barely use him. They are supposedly a "ground and pound" team  yet Sanchez throws 54 FUCKING TIMES yet can't find the endzone until the game is over. The team is just an absolute disgrace and they are one  OT win away from being 2-6.

I also take much joy from the QQing in Philly. That team got DOMINATED by the Falcons yesterday, to the point I just switched the game off in the 3rd quarter. At least they didn't turn the ball over but their offense was terrible, their defense committed so many penalties to keep the Falcons's drives alive and they didn't ever seem to be in the game at all. This team could easily be winless and probably should be. The Falcons do look like a world beater right now, but I'll reserve judgement until they hit the playoffs. The one troubling thing about them is how anemic their rushing game is. A team with Michael Turner should not be having this much trouble running the ball.

Dallas spent heavy in the offseason on defense, and it's the only thing that kept them in that game yesterday. Romo was fucking wretched the first half, and if that defense wasn't so good, the game would have been a rout. Dez Bryant is also a retard. I have yet to see a level of consistency out of him, which pretty much characterizes the entire Cowboys team. Felix Jones shouldn't be that bad at running the ball. I can't understand why they can't find a 3rd receiver in this offense but really, they have two #2's playing at the WR position (Austin is good but not #1 good), a good TE and nothing else. The losses in that division yesterday basically handed the NFC East to the Giants, except for their 2 losses both being against divisional opponents.

Why does Norv Turner still have a job? You can't even score 10 points AGAINST CLEVELAND even when they only score 7 FUCKING POINTS? There is no way anyone can tell me Philip Rivers is an "elite" QB anymore after throwing for 154 yards AGAINST THE BROWNS. He can't blame the lack of a running game - Matthews had 95 yards. Rivers had 18 completions, and only 2 went to a wide receiver. This team is SO BAD.

And speaking of bad, the New Orleans Saints. Brees has 59.7% completion rate, but is only averaging 7.3 yards per attempt. That puts him behind ALEX SMITH, CAM NEWTON AND JOSH FUCKING FREEMAN. Apparently, Sean Payton really is a motherfucking genius or something. Of course, Brees can't play defense, but that's ok, because neither can anyone else on the Saints.

[Slayerik]

Don't forget ole Matthew Stafford stepping it up, and the Madden curse living on! Lions still suck, though.

[HaemishM]

Don't forget ole Matthew Stafford stepping it up, and the Madden curse living on! Lions still suck, though.

Thankfully, so do the Seahawks.