~D&M~ Preseason 5 FINAL ROUND

[eldaec]

Pre-Season 5 Drilling and Manliness - Round 6 of 6

HOLY SHIT Final Round FUUUCCCKKK

1	Emporers of the Pitch
2	Chanson Dada
3	Going Forth By Day
4	Fianna Chulain
5	Pro Elves for Hoes
6	Bridgeburners
7	Ermine Vermin
8	Pound Pound Mantrain
9	Sissyfaced Nancies
10	Aery Faery's (sic)
11	Lesser Immortals
12	Blue Line
13	Calidor Fancypants
14	Stir Fry
15	Midnight Bleat Train
16	Court of the Moon
17	Howls and Bones
18	The Fantasticks
19	Kenosha Maroons
20	Festering Wounds
21	Wrong Games
22	Sons of the West
23	SPHINX

FINAL ROUND FIXTURES

Emporers of the Pitch	3 - 1	Chanson Dada
Going Forth by Day	2 - 1	Fianna Chulain
Pro Elves for Hoes	2 - 1	Lesser Immortals
Bridgeburners	1 - 2	Ermine Vermin
Pound Pound Mantrain	~vs~	Blue Line
Sissyfaced Nancies	5 - 1	Aery Faery's (sic)
Calidor Fancypants	~vs~	Court of the Moon
Stir Fry	~vs~	Midnight Bleat Train
Howls and Bones	~vs~	Festering Wounds
The Fantasticks	~vs~	SPHINX
Kenosha Maroons	0 - 2	Wrong Games
Sons of the West		BYE

TO BE PLAYED BY 19th SEPTEMBER 00:01 GMT+2

WTF, I don't even...



Who Is <insert team>?!

[Ingmar]

ICE - I think we're both Pacific time, so this shouldn't be too hard to get done.

[eldaec]

I guess that would make things really straightforward IF YOU WERE PLAYING ICE CREAM EMPEROR.

Going Forth by Day  ~vs~  Fianna Chulain

[Ingmar]

BILLY KANT REED

I don't think I've ever played Iain before - exciting!

[Strazos]

Ulysees, maybe I'll catch your UK butt this weekend, unless you happen to be up late some night later this week.

[Sjofn]

Fuck, I have to play another khemri team? 

[proudft]

Builds character.

[Sjofn]

At least I'll have both Javert and Valjean for this game. So they can both be killed.

[Ingmar]

At least I'll have both Javert and Valjean for this game. So they can both be killed.

It isn't like you didn't know that's how it ends.

[Celer]

SPOILERS!

Don't worry, my Khemri has not won a single game in its entire existence.  And they've only killed one or two players, tops!

[Ice Cream Emperor]

Okay, Ruvaldt. I am busy Thursday and one other random evening this week but I don't know what it is yet. Other than that I have a lot of free time, so perhaps keep an eye on Steam or set a time that works for you.

I am PST, as Ingmar mentioned. 

[Sjofn]

At least I'll have both Javert and Valjean for this game. So they can both be killed.

It isn't like you didn't know that's how it ends.

Haha, ideally Javert kills himself while failing a dodge and Valjean gets crowdsurfed to death by a bunch of ragamuffins.

[IainC]

BILLY KANT REED

I don't think I've ever played Iain before - exciting!

Meester Ingmar: I am in Mountain time (GMT-7) for the next three days (until the morning of Friday the 16th). I'll then be entirely incommunicado until the evening of Saturday the 17th however I'll be in CET (GMT+1) at that point. I'm playing Gruntle in the Horns and Hooves league tomorrow at about 9ish (my time) and I can play you immediately after that or on Wednesday/Thursday evening this week - say between 8pm and midnight my time. Failing that we'll have to find away to match schedules with a nine hour offset.

[Comstar]

 Pro Elves for Hoes 1   ~vs~     Lesser Immortals 2

My passing game was shut down by the Nurgle team, though having 2 Babes helped a lot, it wasn't enough to stop a 2nd half slaughter and ended up with 4 players left on the pitch. Several times I was able to break 1 elf away to sack the ball carrier...but never able to exploit it. Nurgle team got several injures in the 2nd half and gained 2 skills.

Now the season is over, I finally have a full roster of 12 elves. See you all next pre-season!

[Ruvaldt]

Okay, Ruvaldt. I am busy Thursday and one other random evening this week but I don't know what it is yet. Other than that I have a lot of free time, so perhaps keep an eye on Steam or set a time that works for you.

I am PST, as Ingmar mentioned. 

Wednesday is my boardgame day, but I'll be around all day Tuesday and the weekend so it should be easy to run into each other on Steam.

[Ingmar]

Going Forth By Day 2 - Fianna Chulain 1.

Nuffle gave IainC the finger on a very important play here. He got a slower-than-usual score on turn 4, then a deep kick + a blitz, and managed to get the ball away from me - but failed a GFI to actually score, leaving a stunned wardancer in the end zone with the ball sitting there for the taking. I manage to grab it with a thro-ra, but some quick math shows me he can't actually get to the end zone in time, but I have a +1 speed blitz-ra. A handoff, a dodge, some GFIs, some more failed blocks by Iain and another faceplant on a GFI and somehow I score on turn 8  - without that sequence of events, I end the first half down 2-0. With it, I ended up with a 1-1 tie and receiving the ball.

The 2nd half was just a matter of grinding down the field to score, although he did manage to knock the ball loose at one point... right into the waiting arms of a tomb guardian, who rumbled in for the win on turn 16.

[Ruvaldt]

Nice work, Ingmar.  Still...

[IainC]

Going Forth by Day 2 - 1 Fianna Chulain

Elven bullshit failed me here and Ingmar steamrolled over the bodies of stunned Elves to grind out a victory.

I lost the toss and was receiving first, moved some guys up and looked for an opportunity. Ingmar surrounded all the Elves he could reach and I threw the ball but missed the pass. On turn 4 I pulled out the only spot of Elven bullshit when my Wardancer leapt out of a crowd of Undead right on top of the ball, dodged away and scored. The second kickoff event was a blitz and I moved a lot of players into the Undead end ready to put pressure on the ball. This almost paid off when I blitzed the ball carrier down with a Wardancer, picked the ball up and then ran for a second TD. I failed the GFI for the endzone square though and Ingmar breathed a big sigh of relief. He grabbed the ball, caged up and then bashed chunks out of any Elves in range. I tried to hold him up but my best chance to stop the score on the last turn foundered when I failed a GFI to put an assist on the ball carrier prior to making a blitz. The Undead walked in their first score on the last turn of the half.

I only had seven Elves fit for the second half because all of my KOd players failed to wake up. Nevertheless I kicked it deep and tried to dodge around the Undead to get to the ball carrier. This was almost successful, in that I held up the Undead for much longer than I thought I would, unfortunately numbers and strength took their toll and for the last six turns or so I had four players trying to obstruct the entire Khemrian team. I did actually manage to blitz the ball carrier down at one point but the ball scattered into the hands of a nearby Tomb Guardian.... With that it was pretty much over bar the shouting. I held up the implacable Undead advance as best I could but the final score was inevitable and the second Going Forth TD was scored on their last turn. I had one more turn left and I threw a single block before making a SPP earning pass (for which I needed to burn a reroll...) to end the game.

I felt that I had a few chances to win the game or at least draw it. The GFI in the endzone stung as did the bounce into the TGs hands and the failed GFI to stop the first score. In the end though, Ingmar took my team apart methodically and made the most of his chances.

The game has been uploaded to BB Manager.

[Ulysees]

I'll keep an eye open for you on Steam Strazos - looking forward to getting me some revenge now you ain't playing those murdering norse buggers!

[Ruvaldt]

Emperors of the Pitch 3 - 1 Chanson Dada

A good game in which ICE did all he could to make the inducements work for him, but Nuffle wasn't having any of it.  A spectacular wizard failure marked the beginning of the first half and I managed to score twice as I tried my luck on my 8th round.

The second half saw a TD by ICE on his second round as I made an abysmal choice to start my turn with a block from my block/loner Ogre and got double skulls and loner negated my reroll.  I returned a third TD soon after though and the last few rounds played out as ICE's minotaur gored a lineman, permanently injuring his hip, I think.

Fuck, I have to play those mummies again...

[Ingmar]

Nah, I'm pretty sure I'm the champion based on our head to head. 

[Ice Cream Emperor]

Emperors of the Pitch 3 - 1 Chanson Dada

One of those frustrating games where things aren't exactly horrible but nothing really seems to work quite as well as you need it to. (Except for the kickoff results, which were just pure Nuffle malice: two rocks, a blitz and a perfect defense? F U 2!) This was always going to be a hard game, and I couldn't get the breaks I needed early on to make it winnable -- though for a moment it seemed things might be on the upswing after Ruvaldt's one significant mistake allowed me a quick 2-turn td at the beginning of the second half.

However I am now preparing to take terrible vengeance with my Wood Elves vs. his hapless Pro Elf n00bs... if the game stops disconnecting, at least.

[Modern Angel]

Calidor Fancypants 2-0 Court of the Moon

The High Elves put down a pretty thorough asswhuppin' on their Dark Elf cousins.  Perhaps it was memories of the Kinslaying which drove them to such heights. More likely it was the rash of Both Downs and the Court coming to play six players down. But we'll say it was the memories of the Kinslaying.

Gruntle really was in the hole. He lost three rerolls to Loner by our count and my team is stacked with Blodge Linemen, so those Both Downs were pretty fierce for him. He did prevent a late first half score by me through some elf magic but overall the High Elves were just too much. A surprisingly ugly game for two elf teams but only two injuries, both to the Fancypants. Had to fire my Thrower, Bocephus Fonzerelli, due to -ag.

[Ulysees]

Strazos are you going to be around today or tomorrow for our match and if so what time is good for you? Can stay up late since no work now for a couple of nights and be good to get the last game of the pre-season done and dusted.

[Strazos]

We spoke this evening - I don't have F13 access at work normally, hence the delay.

Also, we have an 8 hour time difference, which is fun.

[proudft]

Wrong Games defeats the Kenosha Maroons 2-0.

The bombardier should have been the Maroons MVP, as he took out an entire cage with his second thrown bomb.  Sadly, his feat went unrecognized and the ball and chain guy stole the MVP award.    The -MV goblin refused to die and leveled, so I took Leap, in the hopes that will get him killed.

I may have to go to a 16-goblin roster, 15 is not enough.       I was hoping for room for a star player, but I never had enough gold for one anyway, so another body on the field would be handy.  Those goblins tend to get thinned out by the end of the game, though the Wrong Games were doing a number on their thralls in this match (vampires were hungry today).

[ezrast]

Wrong Games 2-0 over Kenosha Maroons

My vampires did a better job of not eating every single Thrall this game, and proudft's Trolls did a pretty bad job of not being Really Stupid. Even when my vamps were distracted by tasty sanguine humours, that left ST2 goblins against ST3 thralls, and that pretty much went the way things usually do for Goblins. Memorable moment was me throwing what must have been something like 15 block dice at his ball-carrying pogo guy in one turn without rolling a Defender Down until I gave up and just took a Both Down.

Replay is uploaded, but I was dumb and left it as Day 1.

[Ulysees]

Got schooled by Strazos 5-1, everything worked fine until I tried to pass the ball with my agi 5 line-elf who obviously forgot his passing gloves for this match. Strazos did really well to capitalise on my bad luck and more importantly on my bad play, I left my carrier open to blitzes from his first turn at least twice and paid for it both times.

Oh well it's all learning but I think I'll stick to power teams over the agi ones in the future.

[Strazos]

Game is complete.

This game was in large part a study in frustration for poor Ulysees, who couldn't seem to make a pass for most of the game with his AG5 "Passer", while my team pretty much got whatever rolls were requested. In addition, while I did not have the ball much throughout the match, I certainly made my possessions count, and did my utmost to brutally punish the wood elves for any mistakes they may have made...except for their TD late in the game, when I pointlessly put 2 catchers on his carrier, who simply dodged out, made a simple pass, and walked it in - I should have spread my other players out in an attempt to deny a clean pass.

[eldaec]

Ermine Vermin 2
Bridgeburners  1

Vermin win mostly because of a couple of awkward turnovers, and a werewolf who likes to nap. Good match to finish the competition on.

[drogg]

avaia come back :(

[eldaec]

This is me clearing my throat and checking my watch.

[HaemishM]

Sky, you going to be around for a game this weekend?

[Sjofn]

Oh right!

[Ruvaldt]

This is me clearing my throat and checking my watch.

Yeah, Ingmar and I need to finish this.  I've kept strange hours for the past two weeks.