Sweet, sweet tears.

[Sky]

Youth is wasted on the young.

[Bzalthek]

I never liked that saying.  If the "old" suddenly gained all that youth they'd spend all of it making sure the world never changes.  The only thing that makes this planet livable is knowing all those cockholsters will eventually fucking die and I won't have to hear what "back in my day" was like anymore.  Then I can take their place and rage at the little shits who desperately want me to die, and get off my lawn!  Shoulda been culled in the birthin shed!

[Furiously]

I dunno... I think it would be awesome to have spent my 20's and 30's exploring the world and spending my future earnings doing fun stuff, then paying it all back by working until I was dead.

Instead of working until I'm 65 and only then having the free time only to no longer be physically able to climb a mountain.

[Mrbloodworth]

They say them because in this day and age they won't get slapped in the mouth. Like they should be.

Beat your children.

[Typhon]

I dunno... I think it would be awesome to have spent my 20's and 30's exploring the world and spending my future earnings doing fun stuff, then paying it all back by working until I was dead.

Instead of working until I'm 65 and only then having the free time only to no longer be physically able to climb a mountain.

If I knew that I had to work until I was dead and that all my fun was behind me I would do increasingly more dangerous (and fun!) activities until my number came up.

[Paelos]

They say them because in this day and age they won't get slapped in the mouth. Like they should be.

Beat your children.

I agree. For some reason my generation started the trend of not spanking and giving out trophies for showing up. It wasn't immensely popular, but it's caught on like wildfire.

[Sky]

I never liked that saying.  If the "old" suddenly gained all that youth they'd spend all of it making sure the world never changes.

This is mostly not true. We'd be too busy fucking.

I dunno... I think it would be awesome to have spent my 20's and 30's exploring the world and spending my future earnings doing fun stuff, then paying it all back by working until I was dead.

Instead of working until I'm 65 and only then having the free time only to no longer be physically able to climb a mountain.

That's why I spent my 20s being a vagabond and a gypsy. Sure, I got a late start on a career, but since I'll probably never be able to retire anyway, it's not a huge setback. In fact, I might be back to square one soon anyway. And when I look back over my 20s (vagabond) and 30s (career), the 20s are the part I'll remember fondly. It's tough to sustain that lifestyle without getting really road-worn, though.

For some reason my generation started the trend of not spanking and giving out trophies for showing up. It wasn't immensely popular, but it's caught on like wildfire.

Mostly this. People are shocked when I tell them I was paddled in school. Which meant dropping your pants and having a grown man hit your bare ass as hard as he could with a wooden paddle (think cricket bat). Sounds kind of odd, but it was really fucking effective. Unless ten of your buddies were also there and you just kept laughing through it. Maybe a bit brutal, but you earned the right to be a troublemaker back then.

Then we got to high school and the hippies had taken over and instead of being beaten bloody, you'd just go sit in a room for a few hours (which in my case was backed on by the music room, so I'd just grab a guitar and play). Not punishment. Probably about the same time jail became about rehabilitation instead of punishment, too. And when we stopped treating the insane in institutions and put them on the street. It's working great!

[Merusk]

They say them because in this day and age they won't get slapped in the mouth. Like they should be.

Beat your children.

I agree. For some reason my generation started the trend of not spanking and giving out trophies for showing up. It wasn't immensely popular, but it's caught on like wildfire.

Actually it was parents in the 80s that started it, typically Late-life Boomers. Gen X just picked up the torch and carried it.

[HaemishM]

I don't remember having to drop my pants for paddlings in school. 

[ghost]

I don't remember having to drop my pants for paddlings in school. 

That's in Catholic school.

[Sky]

Yeah, that was my dad, actually. School was pants-on paddlings. 

[ghost]

I'm not sure that makes it better.   
 

[Paelos]

They say them because in this day and age they won't get slapped in the mouth. Like they should be.
Beat your children.

I agree. For some reason my generation started the trend of not spanking and giving out trophies for showing up. It wasn't immensely popular, but it's caught on like wildfire.

Actually it was parents in the 80s that started it, typically Late-life Boomers. Gen X just picked up the torch and carried it.

My parents never really bought into the beatings because I was playing so many sports I was already covered head to toe in cuts and bruises.

[ajax34i]

Belts are really painful too (what I got when I was a kid), as are really thin wood sticks.

People are shocked nowadays, but the thing is, I didn't get the belt daily.  Only for MAJOR offenses.  Like, maybe a couple times a year.  Most of the time my parents would just threaten to belt me, and that was damn effective, and thus sufficient.

[Strazos]

Same. Mom punched me in the arm once for backtalking in front of our exchange student. I think I was more shocked than actually hurt.

[Sjofn]

I got accused of being raised by "hippies" because neither of my parents were big on the spanking. One good shot to the butt if you were doing something bad that needed to be stopped RIGHT NOW, AND NEVER TO BE DONE AGAIN, and that was about it. I can remember them doing it like ... twice. It was threatened ALL THE TIME, but never really done. Of course, my siblings and I beat the shit out of each other for fun (mostly in the legs and arms, mind you), so my mother gave up trying to get us to stop completely and instead taught us you Do Not Hit While Angry ... it worked, oddly enough, but gave them even less of a standing to swat us. :P

The thought of my father, of all people, being a hippie cracks me right the fuck up. On some subjects, he is pretty much a wingnut. He just never saw the point in smacking his kids. Psychological warfare, on the other hand, that was totally fair game, such as offering me a quarter to follow through on my threat to run away when I was six. 

[NiX]

Belts are really painful too (what I got when I was a kid), as are really thin wood sticks.

People are shocked nowadays, but the thing is, I didn't get the belt daily.  Only for MAJOR offenses.  Like, maybe a couple times a year.  Most of the time my parents would just threaten to belt me, and that was damn effective, and thus sufficient.

This is the way it was for me. I FEARED the belt. No one could understand why I feared my 4'11" mother so much, but she instilled the fear of God in me and I did everything in my power to do no wrong.

[Ingmar]

The problem with these discussions is that every kid is going to respond in their own way. You can't really say "well everything would just be better if we beat the kids more" because some % of kids will respond worse to that sort of discipline than to whatever other options there are.

[rk47]

*wondered if he entered the wrong thread by mistake*

 

[Sheepherder]

Probably about the same time jail became about rehabilitation instead of punishment, too. And when we stopped treating the insane in institutions and put them on the street. It's working great!

I can't tell if you're deliberately being stupid or if you actually believe that the US is capable of running rehab programs for it's prison population.

[Der Helm]

I thought he was being ironic/sarcastic. Bring back green !

[Ironwood]

Growing up in Kilmarnock meant that my parents didn't believe in the smack.  Well, maybe just a couple of grams to get me to sleep at night.

[Mrbloodworth]

The problem with these discussions is that every kid is going to respond in their own way. You can't really say "well everything would just be better if we beat the kids more" because some % of kids will respond worse to that sort of discipline than to whatever other options there are.

No, if they say things like we are discussing, slap them in the mouth.

[ghost]

The debate of spanking versus not is just a small portion of the overall issue.  The negative reactions to spanking children has, for a lot of parents, swung so far that many parents don't punish their kids at all.  And some parents barely do any parenting. When a kid pushes my kid down, I shouldn't be the one that has to explain to their child that it isn't the right thing to do.  Spanking is a dangerous way to punish because it can lead to full on abuse in the wrong hands, but I don't believe that it should be absolutely ruled out.  I can think of almost nothing I would personally spank my kids for, but if they say "nigger", for any reason, they will be getting a spanking, I can guarantee you that. 

[Sky]

Probably about the same time jail became about rehabilitation instead of punishment, too. And when we stopped treating the insane in institutions and put them on the street. It's working great!

I can't tell if you're deliberately being stupid or if you actually believe that the US is capable of running rehab programs for it's prison population.

Talk to the people who think jail makes criminals into fine, upstanding citizens. I'm all about the three strikes rule and capital punishment. But also less laws, but then we're heading down to that forum, so I'll leave off this part of the discussion, yeah? To answer you, I think jails are great places for criminals to become hardened, and we lock up far too many people. Hey, it drives local economies!

The last really good punishment I took from my dad was from rough-housing in the playground, tripped this girl who, as it turns out, was his boss's daughter. Bloodied her knee, I wasn't able to sit for days. I ended up moving in with my mom and she lived in a rougher town so I learned how to fight and steal and swear :p Guess I should've stuck with the spankings. Ah, well. Makes me crazy when kids blame their upbringing for their problems. I had things plenty rough, but it makes you a better person if you learn from it and move on with life.

[Morat20]

No, if they say things like we are discussing, slap them in the mouth.

That will make some of them do it more often.

Because if they stop, you've won and teenagers are stubborn, hormone-driven beasts who lack any sort of experience and -- in some ways -- necessary brain functions to deal with some of their basic instincts. Like, say, beating the environment into submission and proving they're the boss.

Some of them will say such shit just to get slapped, because getting slapped is proof they've riled their parents up and forced them to lose their temper. Now, if the slap hurts enough -- they'll find other ways to do it, but "hurts enough" will vary and in a lot of cases be past punishment and into abuse. Which they also can work out.

Let's face it -- either you, as a parent, are or are not capable of smacking your kid hard enough to cause injury. If you are capable, you're abusing them. If you're not, the kid will probably take the relatively minor pain in return for a social success, because that's what his hormones are screaming for.

I could smack my kid until the sun went out, and he'd view it as a win right now. I could ground him and he'd view it as a win. On the other hand, confiscate his cell phone and he gets all insanely pissed off and then crumples, because I've removed access to his friends and gf, and that's something he's willing to lose to retain.

Every kid is different. There is no 'universal solution'. But anything you do has to start with realizing what makes your kid tick, and why he's all of a sudden turned into an asshole.

Now if your kid is 8 and an asshole, that's more your problem as a parent. If he's a teenager and an asshole, well, teenager MEANS asshole in like four languages. :)

[bhodi]

Unlocking this. I think one of us fat-fingered the lock button, sorry.

[Sheepherder]

Talk to the people who think jail makes criminals into fine, upstanding citizens.

The US prison system doesn't do what you think it does.  Crisis averted.

[HaemishM]

My dad had the belt. My mom would use THE SWITCH. And you had to go pick out your own switch. If you don't know what a switch is, you didn't get beat right. 

[Mrbloodworth]

Unlocking this. I think one of us fat-fingered the lock button, sorry.

I thought it was closed to protect the children. 

[Sky]

The US prison system doesn't do what you think it does.  Crisis averted.

Ok, I'll bite. What do I think it does?

[NiX]

Unlocking this. I think one of us fat-fingered the lock button, sorry.

That explains a lot. I usually just accidentally click Modify instead of Quote.

[Sheepherder]

Derail here.

[SurfD]

My dad had the belt. My mom would use THE SWITCH. And you had to go pick out your own switch. If you don't know what a switch is, you didn't get beat right. 

I grew up in a farming community.  My mother started off with wooden spoons (the thickass industrial kind).  When we were about 7 or so, she graduated to a Cattle Prod (the 8 or so D size battery kind).

[ghost]

When we were about 7 or so, she graduated to a Cattle Prod (the 8 or so D size battery kind).

This sounds super creepy, for a variety of reasons.