2009 NFL

[Sjofn]

I miss Spags. :(

Preach it. :(

[01101010]

Oh dear god why do the Browns constantly look like a Div III team? Anderson...really? And to top the next embarrassing weekend off right, the Indians hire the worst Manager in the league for the next three years. Its like the whole town has a "Major League" thing going on, only without the ending...

I seriously think they should just move the team to LA now and be done with it. 10 years of toilet training and the Browns are still shitting on the carpet - time for them to leave and take the Indians with them.

[Margalis]

The Indians hired Tony LaRussa?

Edit: Minnesota lost and Farve lost the ball twice for 14 points. Let the questioning begin!

[Paelos]

The Indians hired Tony LaRussa?

Edit: Minnesota lost and Farve lost the ball twice for 14 points. Let the questioning begin!

There's no questions, he gets worse as the season goes on. It wasn't the total de-pantsing I expected, but I never thought they could beat Pittsburgh.

[HaemishM]

LOVE IT. Favre loses, Green Bay wins, Saints come back from a billion points down to beat a team they shouldn't have had any trouble with in the first place. They started getting it together when they stopped throwing on every down and started ramming Mike Bell down the Fins throats on first and second down. The Dolphins had no clue how to stop the Saints then.

This was blowout weekend. Chicago gets cockpunched by the Bungles, the Raiders finally bench Jamarcus Russell and still get shutout, Kansas City still sucks as does Tampa and St. Louis. I swear this is the year when parity falls apart. We now have 3 tiers of teams - the really good (somehow), the mid-level playoff possible teams, and the really shitty shit shit shit teams. I won't be watching the Eagles dismantle this fuckawful Skins team tonight.

[JWIV]

LOVE IT. Favre loses, Green Bay wins, Saints come back from a billion points down to beat a team they shouldn't have had any trouble with in the first place. They started getting it together when they stopped throwing on every down and started ramming Mike Bell down the Fins throats on first and second down. The Dolphins had no clue how to stop the Saints then.

This was blowout weekend. Chicago gets cockpunched by the Bungles, the Raiders finally bench Jamarcus Russell and still get shutout, Kansas City still sucks as does Tampa and St. Louis. I swear this is the year when parity falls apart. We now have 3 tiers of teams - the really good (somehow), the mid-level playoff possible teams, and the really shitty shit shit shit teams. I won't be watching the Eagles dismantle this fuckawful Skins team tonight.

With next year increasingly looking to be uncapped, things could get really interesting as we'll see how much money the lower quality teams throw at free agents in an attempt to improve (It'll be a race between Al Davis and Dan Snyder to overpay the most). 

[Nevermore]

LOVE IT. Favre loses, Green Bay wins, Saints come back from a billion points down to beat a team they shouldn't have had any trouble with in the first place. They started getting it together when they stopped throwing on every down and started ramming Mike Bell down the Fins throats on first and second down. The Dolphins had no clue how to stop the Saints then.

It wasn't Mike Bell that killed the Dolphins.  Yeah, the Saints were able to move the ball much, much better in the second half but the Fins still win the game if Ted fucking Ginn isn't the worst receiver in the entire NFL.  Cam Cameron's gift that keeps on giving.

[Fordel]

The Dolphins are going to be doing Tackle Drills all week is my guess. So many 5 yard nothing plays ended up being 30-60 yard explosions due to shitty tackling.

[HaemishM]

With next year increasingly looking to be uncapped, things could get really interesting as we'll see how much money the lower quality teams throw at free agents in an attempt to improve (It'll be a race between Al Davis and Dan Snyder to overpay the most). 

Things is, both those guys have been overpaying for free agents for years. Free agents are so rarely as impactful in the NFL as they are in other sports, unless you are talking about HOF QB's like Favre. I'll laugh to see Snyder throw even more money at over the hill fuckers and barely finish 2 games below .500. Al Davis has just lost his fucking mind.

[Nebu]

Don't forget the owners that throw money at players just because they want to say that they owned/knew them.  Having no salary cap is going to open up a can of worms that may tank the NFL. 

[Cyrrex]

The problem with Snyder is that he throws too much money at people that are not even close to being worth it.  It's ultimately a team full of fucking nobodies, except for the occasional Haynesworth.  Oakland's issues begin and end with Al Davis.  There isn't an issue with that team that can't somehow be traced right back to his special brand of madness.

I've just stated what's already blatantly obvious.  Have a good day.

[Sauced]

With no other obvious explanation for the Bears complete meltdown, I'm anxiously awaiting the discovery of what the problem with Tommie Harris is, exactly, since I've started imagining something bad happened that not only kept him out of the game (when everyone swears he's 100%) but also delivered a major blow to team chemistry in the process.

Or they just suck.

To wit:

When pressed in an e-mail about why he wouldn't play Sunday, Harris said it was because of his "sphincter," which all but nullified any validity to his original claim.

[Cyrrex]

The problem with the Bears, in my extremely narrow minded POV, is that now that they've begun to address their offensive issues (which I earnestly believe they have), their defense is going to complete shit.

[Sauced]

The offensive line is absolutely horrid.  Cutler essentially runs "3 step drop then roll out" plays, and Forte is being hit in the backfield on over 40% of their running plays, which is Dire.

Their defense requires pretty much "great" play up the middle.

Pretty close to Great : 2005/2006-era Tommie Harris, Brian Urlacher, Mike Brown
Not so much: Marcus Harrison, Nick Roach, Al Afalava (R)

Unless the Bengals game was a *complete fluke*, it's going to be hard to turn this around.  Now that they traded next years 2nd round pick for Gaines Adams, next April will be the second draft in a row where they don't make a pick until round 3.  Things could get a lot worse before they get better.

[01101010]

The offensive line is absolutely horrid.  Cutler essentially runs "3 step drop then roll out" plays, and Forte is being hit in the backfield on over 40% of their running plays, which is Dire.

Their defense requires pretty much "great" play up the middle.

Pretty close to Great : 2005/2006-era Tommie Harris, Brian Urlacher, Mike Brown
Not so much: Marcus Harrison, Nick Roach, Al Afalava (R)

Unless the Bengals game was a *complete fluke*, it's going to be hard to turn this around.  Now that they traded next years 2nd round pick for Gaines Adams, next April will be the second draft in a row where they don't make a pick until round 3.  Things could get a lot worse before they get better.

Big fucking deal... they aren't the Browns. I only say this because on the cleveland plain dealer articles, it seems most Browns fans have taken up the mantle of being the worst is at least something.

"how about them Brownies!"
'holy shit they suck'
"I know huh? awesome isn't it?"
 

[Rasix]

An item that may only be of interest/amusement for FF players:  Jon Gruden just called McNabb "durable".

[Paelos]

An item that may only be of interest/amusement for FF players:  Jon Gruden just called McNabb "durable".

Gruden's just filling in the noise they give every QB when they are winning. MNF seems unwilling to talk about anything else.

[HaemishM]

They do suck copious amounts of QB cock. I've seen less enthusiastic knob polishing in pr0n.

[Brogarn]

I avoided the knob polishing last night as I couldn't come up with a reason to watch the game. There was no way the Redskins would win and the state of both teams convinced me it would be a shitty game regardless of the outcome. According to the recap I read this morning, my predictions were proven true.

NFC East... remember when people talked it up? Ya... not so much now. I try not to think too long on the fact that the Giants, while in the lead, are still not that far ahead. Looking at Philly and Dallas it means they're mediocre at best. Once again... Please to be bringing back Spags please.

[naum]

I avoided the knob polishing last night as I couldn't come up with a reason to watch the game. There was no way the Redskins would win and the state of both teams convinced me it would be a shitty game regardless of the outcome. According to the recap I read this morning, my predictions were proven true.

Watching the Redskins… …man, it's just painful.

Jason Campbell might be the worst starting NFL QB (other than Raiders Russell) though once every 20 plays, a false ray appears, making it actually look like he has the talent and potential to excel at the position…

[01101010]

Watching the Redskins… …man, it's just painful.

Jason Campbell might be the worst starting NFL QB (other than Raiders Russell) though once every 20 plays, a false ray appears, making it actually look like he has the talent and potential to excel at the position…

Can I introduce you to Mr. Anderson?

[Brogarn]

Jason Campbell might be the worst starting NFL QB (other than Raiders Russell) though once every 20 plays, a false ray appears, making it actually look like he has the talent and potential to excel at the position…

Watching CBS' pregame show the other day, they had Charley Casserly on breaking down what Jason Campbell was doing, not doing, and definitely not seeing. The guy just does not have the ability to analyze what he sees and make quick decisions based off of that. He's just not good nor will he ever be because he doesn't think on his feet quickly enough. Backup QB is as high as he ever should have gotten.

[Nevermore]

Watching the Redskins… …man, it's just painful.

Jason Campbell might be the worst starting NFL QB (other than Raiders Russell) though once every 20 plays, a false ray appears, making it actually look like he has the talent and potential to excel at the position…

Can I introduce you to Mr. Anderson?

I think Jake "Hi, I've already thrown 13 interceptions" Delhomme would like a seat at that table.

You know, when you stop to think about it there are a lot of really, really bad QBs in the league right now.

[HaemishM]

I don't know what the fuck happened to Delhomme. He was never going to be a premier QB in the league, but fuck it, he's better than he has been since that playoff game with Arizona. For that matter, I can't figure out why Carolina is so bad. They have a good running game, and even though they are getting old, Steve Smith and Musin Muhammed still have enough left in the tank to get open for Delhomme. But they just suck it.

There's a lot of just suck-ass teams this year. After Derek Anderson completed just 2 passes in the entire Buffalo game (and yet the Browns still won), I'd have thought they'd go back to Quinn. At least he's younger - but holy shit, they are just piling one bad decision on top of another.

[Hoax]

There are some backups that you would think some of these teams would try to pick up and see if a fresh start is what they need:

***David Carr (his o-line was so terrible for almost the entire time in Texas)
***AJ Feeley (why doesn't this guy get a shot in Carolina?  He managed games well in Philly)
***Jeff motherfucking Garcia (this guy is 10 times the QB as so many starters in the league I just can't fathom why somebody doesn't swoop him up)
Rex Grossman (ok this is a stretch but considering Kyle Orton apparently doesn't suck this guy might be worth a 4th-6th round pick to see if lightning can strike twice right?)
Jon Kitna (again, we know this guy can at least keep a mediocre team at 8-8, not the Lions but the Bengals he pulled it off several times, he may be too old at this point though)
***Matt Leinhart (he's from USC and he's not named Booty, he won a heisman, how has his contract not expired in Arizona at this point?)
Sage Rosenfels (I swear this guy can probably play QB in the league, not well but beter then Jason Campbell)
Chris Sims (I hate this little punk, his fucking dad too but again he was looking good for a minute there back in Tampa before he lacerated his spleen or whatever that was)
Alex Smith (Looks like he might finally have woken up and decided to play football, not a game too early for the 49ers, might be a 1-game abboration though)
Troy Smith (I know he's 4 feet tall but he had the starting job won from Flacco before he fucked up his foot)
Jim Sorgi (like many on this list, he should be a  backup but all be damned if he hasn't been twice the QB many of these awful starters are when called upon)
Mike Vick (for real, how is he not on the Raiders, at least they would sell out the next 1-3 games)
Billy Volek (at least he has managed games successfully on back to back Sundays in his career, unlike say, Jamarcus Russle)

[HaemishM]

No, Carr really is that terrible. I was a cheerleader for Carr for a while - he had a shitty O-Line in Houston. But he sucked just as bad in Carolina with a better O-line. He holds onto the ball too long and gets hammered.

You're right about Rosenfels. He'd have been the starting QB at some point this season in Minnesota if Favre hadn't come back, because Jackson was going to lose that job eventually. Kitna's way too old. Leinart is still signed to his original contract I think, and they expect him to take over for the Gargoyle once Warner retires gets his shins split. Alex Smith does look like he may have learned a thing or two holding the clipboard, but let's see him do it against a decent D. Sorgi and Volek could both be better than Jamarcus Russell, Derek Anderson or Jason Campbell have been. As for Vick, I'm as surprised as you that the Raiders weren't camped outside the prison with a contract. Hell, I thought Al Davis personally issued authographed shanks to the Raiders players when they signed.

[Segoris]

Rex Grossman (ok this is a stretch but considering Kyle Orton apparently doesn't suck this guy might be worth a 4th-6th round pick to see if lightning can strike twice right?)

Strongly disagree with this one. Orton did decent with what he had in Chicago for the short time he was there. He was honestly who I wanted as a starter for a while. Grossman was entirely different. The Bears had problems with dropped passes and the o-line breaking down at times during Grossman's short lived era, but they also had a much better line then they do now. I'd estimate 75% of Grossman's mistakes were his own and now someone else's fault.

However, since he was a Bear, no matter where he goes he'll be a superstar as that is what happens to anyone the Bears trade away/don't keep (Benson, Jones, Orton, Berrian, etc).

[Segoris]

Watching the Redskins… …man, it's just painful.

Jason Campbell might be the worst starting NFL QB (other than Raiders Russell) though once every 20 plays, a false ray appears, making it actually look like he has the talent and potential to excel at the position…

Can I introduce you to Mr. Anderson?

I think Jake "Hi, I've already thrown 13 interceptions" Delhomme would like a seat at that table.

You know, when you stop to think about it there are a lot of really, really bad QBs in the league right now.

Is it too early to add Sanchez to that list? I lost a bet 2 weeks ago when I hoped he'd throw more interceptions then Brady threw TD's. He was 1 off during that slaughter in New England 

[JWIV]

There are some backups that you would think some of these teams would try to pick up and see if a fresh start is what they need:

Troy Smith (I know he's 4 feet tall but he had the starting job won from Flacco before he fucked up his foot)

It wasn't so much Smith's foot.  Right at the end of preseason he got the mother of all tonsil infections.  Came ridiculously close to dying and lost 20+ lbs from it.  He was fucked up enough from it that there were serious concerns his career was going to end.

But in other news, Snyder has banned all signs from Fed Ex field now.  Apparently, the security staff has also started threatening fans wearing any type of derogatory shirt as well.    Dude is trying to start a revolt or something.

[Abagadro]

It's hilarious that Snyder has managed to make people pine for the days of that bastard Jack Kent Cook.

[Hoax]

Watching the Redskins… …man, it's just painful.

Jason Campbell might be the worst starting NFL QB (other than Raiders Russell) though once every 20 plays, a false ray appears, making it actually look like he has the talent and potential to excel at the position…

Can I introduce you to Mr. Anderson?

I think Jake "Hi, I've already thrown 13 interceptions" Delhomme would like a seat at that table.

You know, when you stop to think about it there are a lot of really, really bad QBs in the league right now.

Is it too early to add Sanchez to that list? I lost a bet 2 weeks ago when I hoped he'd throw more interceptions then Brady threw TD's. He was 1 off during that slaughter in New England 

Are you seriously suggesting that Mark Sanchez sucks?  You know that's a sucky QB list right?  Not a hey its his rookie season and its already hard to think he wont take his team to the playoffs the next time NE has an off year.  I feel like I must be misreading, did you type the wrong name?  Kerry Collins maybe?

[Brogarn]

Ya, no shit. It's way too early to judge Sanchez either way.

[Nebu]

I feel like I must be misreading, did you type the wrong name?  Kerry Collins maybe?

I can't speak badly of Collins.  On top of the fact that he's had a pretty good run in his career (2 time Pro Bowler and 37k yds passing), the guy does a ton of solid charity work.  Rather than bad, let's just say he's past his prime. 

[Cyrrex]

Collins has never been considered to be much more than a journeyman anyway.  With the right team, that works fine.  Titans aren't that team anymore.

[WayAbvPar]

It's hilarious that Snyder has managed to make people pine for the days of that bastard Jack Kent Cook.

I feel for Jim Zorn. The rest of those fuckers can die in a car fire, and I am enjoying the hell out of the failboat they are sailing.