Star Wars Episodes 1, 2, & 3

[Venkman]

That review slowed down a bit towards the end, but it was definitely fun.

I believe that Anakin believed that if the Jedi found out, he'd be toast, but we're never told this, and even Padme told Anakin that Obi-Wan wanted to help him. He probably would have been given a harsh choice, to divorce Padme and not assoicate with her, or give up the Jedi, but we'll never know what Yoda's advice would have been, because Anakin continually lied about his relationship.

Apparently, according to the EU, Obi-Wan had a secret wife, too!

In here, somewhere:
http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Obi-Wan_Kenobi

 

Anakin's "secret" wife. Obi Wan never married. Just to clear that up.

Yoda woulda told Anakin to make the same choice Obi Wan would have. Yoda was hard core about the rules, having basically created and effectively run the Jedi Order for a few centuries, only realizing in the end he was training Jedi for the last war.

Actually, the only thing that didn't work for me was the way Thrawn treated the Noghri.

The very fact that it sealed his fate just made it even worse.  If you read the rest of the Stuff written about Thrawn thereafter, it made even LESS sense.

Everything after that period of time was retcon bullshit*. Thrawn recognized why he was exiled to the outer rim (for not being human), and the Noghri to him were tools more than people. He had an appreciation for cultures (his main weapon), but it's not like he respected them as equals. Even as a non-human, he was as much a racist as the rest of the imperial leadership of the time.

* Which of course is the real fun part of all the EU stuff 

[Merusk]

Everything after that period of time was retcon bullshit*. Thrawn recognized why he was exiled to the outer rim (for not being human), and the Noghri to him were tools more than people. He had an appreciation for cultures (his main weapon), but it's not like he respected them as equals. Even as a non-human, he was as much a racist as the rest of the imperial leadership of the time.

* Which of course is the real fun part of all the EU stuff 

IIRC he saw them as tools because he perceived them as having no real cutlure.  They were primitives who didn't even have "art" which was why it was such a big shocking reveal when they showed Leia what their art actually was.  I don't remember what it was, just that it was a "Oh, hell, Thrawn's wrong here" moment.

[Abagadro]

Harry Plinkett's Ep. II episode is up

[Musashi]

Awesome.

[stu]

The creepy new Ep. III Plinkett review is up. 

http://www.redlettermedia.com/sith.html

[Abagadro]

The creepy new Ep. III Plinkett review is up. 

http://www.redlettermedia.com/sith.html

Thanks for the heads up. Something to watch tonight after I am into my cups a bit.

The recent one on Trek 2009 is pretty good too if anyone is interested.

[Arthur_Parker]

I think I feel asleep during one of the new 3 movies, but the first 60 seconds of this review cracked me up.  Batman and Robin, only other movie I ever feel asleep in.

[Sir T]

Watching these is the only way to make these movies actually enjoyable to watch.

[Ratman_tf]

The creepy new Ep. III Plinkett review is up. 

http://www.redlettermedia.com/sith.html

Gah! His PM rantview was spot on, but his Ep2 and 3 stuff has to scrape the bottom of the barrel for material.

[Abagadro]

Everything in those movies is the bottom of the barrel.

[Ratman_tf]

Everything in those movies is the bottom of the barrel.

But they gave net nerds decades worth of material to bitch about.  

[Engels]

Watched this in its entirety this morning. I had to watch the Robot Chicken parody of E III to get the sour taste out of my mouth. The whole thing is depressing. It should be studied in film school the same way the WACO Texas massacre is probably studied at the ATF academy.

[Abagadro]

Sitting on a couch!

[Tannhauser]

Really enjoyed this, dude made some GREAT points.  Having said that, I wish I had created something that folks would talk about for over thirty years.

[WindupAtheist]

I like Plinkett. I enjoyed Revenge of the Sith, but then again I enjoy nitpicking even more.

[LK]

Wow, totally didn't notice that about Episode 1 - 3. Good watch (as well as Star Trek).

[UnSub]

Really enjoyed this, dude made some GREAT points.  Having said that, I wish I had created something that folks would talk about for over thirty years.

I appreciate his sharpness in looking at the films, but think the misogynist comedy gets in the way. Will watch it later though.

[Abagadro]

It's more anti-feline than misogynist this time around.

[Ratman_tf]

Sitting on a couch!

Shot, reverse-shot.

[Tebonas]

What the fuck is wrong with that person? I mean the review is funny, but the person is seriously deranged if he thinks the surrounding bits add anything at all besides a sour taste for watching it.

[WindupAtheist]

He could have cut out the filmed bits with the chick trying to kill him, limited himself to his better criticisms, and trimmed half an hour off the the total running time. Yes Harry, everyone was totally fooled by Palpatine's ascent to power, including "super genius" Padme. She didn't spit out a scornful "So this is how liberty dies!" comment right in that scene, and Palaptine wasn't eventually overthrown and killed in a massive civil war.

Most of it was funny, but occasionally it felt like he was just filling time for some reason.

[LK]

The misogynist stuff was to build on the Plinkett character. Film reviewing, psychotic, Tony Clifton. He knew he wanted to do a funny voice to make people pay attention more, and maybe wanted to create a juxtaposition from the hyper-intelligent film reviewer and story telling critic with about the worst, unimaginable human being on the planet.

The dude knows what the hell he's doing by his logical arguments and accurate critiques. I'd rather analyze why he did what he did than to say "he should have cut that stuff or done it differently." That's pretty much what he is saying about Star Wars prequels the entire time, and in perhaps the best fashion possible with regards to respect for the material and movie-making and story-telling techniques.

[WindupAtheist]

Okay fine, Padme was totally fooled and the "Liberty dies, argh!" line was all in my head, etcetera, and the critique is totally spot-on in every way. Just don't hit me with any more italics. They hurt me so.

[Abagadro]

Padme's comment needed to be made on a couch or while walking down a fake corridor for it to have any resonance.

[Tannhauser]

Plinkett mentioned this and I have seen it somewhere before;  They have a camera on Lucas and his Yes-Men as they finish watching Phantom Menace.  The look on their faces, as they realize what a turd they just cranked out, was fucking priceless.  You can see Lucas realize, for a brief shining second, that he has raped his own childhood.  Then he starts spinning the movie right there to cover up his fuck up.

I love that scene, because I had always thought that Lucas thought his movies were amazing.  That showed me that Lucas, even in his secluded ranch of yes men, realized he blew it.

[Sir T]

I think he put in the chick wanting to kill him bits to show how the hell you actually do filmmaking.

[Abagadro]

One of my favorite things is that in Lucas's office there appears to be a very large set of Cliff Notes.

[Tannhauser]

Really liked his observation that folks remember IG-88 and other obscure names/things from the first three films and not the recent three.  Took me 30 seconds to dredge up Dexter Jettster again, thus proving Plinkett's point.

Who was the Gungan Boss?  Boss...Natt?  Honestly can't remember.

[WindupAtheist]

Once more unto the breach!

Plinkett mentioned this and I have seen it somewhere before;  They have a camera on Lucas and his Yes-Men as they finish watching Phantom Menace.  The look on their faces, as they realize what a turd they just cranked out, was fucking priceless.  You can see Lucas realize, for a brief shining second, that he has raped his own childhood.  Then he starts spinning the movie right there to cover up his fuck up.

I love that scene, because I had always thought that Lucas thought his movies were amazing.  That showed me that Lucas, even in his secluded ranch of yes men, realized he blew it.

This right here is pretty much the most pervasive fantasy of the hardcore Star Wars anti-fanboy: The notion that despite getting better reviews than he's used to and making another eleventy-billion dollars, George Lucas on some level cares about or even shares their opinion. He got off light with the critics and got his new moneyhat, but damn it the internet is outraged and he will acknowledge that, even if that acknowledgement consists of me analyzing his facial expressions!

If we're going to play "Read the Mind of George Lucas!" then I'm taking that picture of him running around in a "Han Shot First" t-shirt as evidence that he considers the "Baww my childhood raped!" crowd amusing at best.

Really liked his observation that folks remember IG-88 and other obscure names/things from the first three films their childhood and not the recent three now.  Took me 30 seconds to dredge up Dexter Jettster again, thus proving Plinkett's point.

Who was the Gungan Boss?  Boss...Natt?  Honestly can't remember.

Fixed. Also, was the name IG-88 even spoken in a Star Wars movie? Did he even move or speak? I took him for being Darth Vader's coffee machine or something. Yeah if you remember IG-88 it's all because he was a great character.

Seriously, I don't care whether someone hates Star Wars, or certain parts of Star Wars, or all of it, or whatever. I just don't have any stomach for the perpetually butthurt anti-fanboy who haunts the internet, eternally seeking some validation of said butthurt from George Lucas so that he can finally have closure.

I hated the shit out of Transformers 2 and it staggers me that it managed to make a million-zillion dollars. Nevertheless, you're not going to fucking catch me on the internet five years from now analyzing Michael Bay's facial expressions because I can't have peace until he tells me it was okay to hate his movie.

[Abagadro]

The other thing that amused me in this one was that Plinkett addressed specifically the two arguments WUA uses constantly.

[stu]

I think it was during the last Celebration interview with Stewart that Lucas used "amusing" to describe what he thinks about people who delve deeply into Star Wars. He's an independent guy and probably doesn't consider what he's doing to be contempt for long-time fans.

The Cliff Notes on the desk was my favorite part of the review, but Lucas claims to only have time to read comics anyways, so whatevs.

Michael Chabon did an essay about how more children's entertainment needs to have children as it's central characters. He felt that comics in particular are too often about teens and adults. Lucas addressed this, in his own way, and that's great. Good for him. The problem was that he changed the formula halfway through the series. Lucas took a risk trying to be inventive while pulling in the youngsters and made a mistake.

[WindupAtheist]

The other thing that amused me in this one was that Plinkett addressed specifically the two arguments WUA uses constantly.

Which are what?

I was too busy being crushed by Plinkett's insightful revelation that most of the dialogue is delivered by characters who are either sitting, standing, or sometimes walking to catch much else. Now all I can think about is how everyone should have been reciting their lines while hanging from trapezes.

That and how that silent motionless pile of tin cans next to Boba Fett in one scene in Empire Strikes Back was a great and memorable character, and how nothing in the prequels could possibly be as memorable as... good old... tin can robot guy.

EDIT: Actually, we have to be getting trolled. Nobody thinks IG-88 was a memorable character. It was a fucking prop.

[Ratman_tf]

I think it was during the last Celebration interview with Stewart that Lucas used "amusing" to describe what he thinks about people who delve deeply into Star Wars.

And yet he's the guy trying to swing some really poorly told epic tragedy about Anakin's fall.

[Kail]

Nobody thinks IG-88 was a memorable character. It was a fucking prop.

I think people need to take a minute to read some of IG-88's backstory.  It's the stuff of neckbeard nightmares.  He was leading a droid uprising to eliminate all biological life, and to this end, controlled the factory that manufactured most of the droids in the galaxy, into which he inserted code which would allow him to control them all.  Also, he uploaded his "consciousness" to the second Death Star and took it over, locking the Emperor in his throne room prior to the last fight.  IG-88 was moments away from the grand reveal (presumably some kind of "EX-TER-MI-NATE" to everyone in the system) when the station was destroyed, thus accidentally saving the galaxy from a threat nobody knew existed.

This is supposed to be an awesome character?  It reads like middle school fan fiction.

[Ironwood]

The funny thing is, in the context of the first 3 movies, Boba Fett was just as emotionally invested a character as IG-88.

What's my line in this scene ?  Oh, right, I just stand here ?  Ok.  And, in this first film, you're sure I'll be in this scene ?  I won't be cut out ?  I won't be rendered obsolete and then reimposed with CGI tech in a decades time ?  You're sure now ?  Ok.  What was the line ?  'Put Him in the Cargo Hold'.  As opposed to where ?  I mean, I'm not gonna put him in the bedroom, no matter what Robot Chicken thinks.

All the bounty hunters sucked.  What was important was how much fans would wank over them.  Boba Fett just won the Jizz contest, is all.