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Topic: Young, in love and confused. (Read 54784 times)
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Venkman
Terracotta Army
Posts: 11536
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Going by this thread only, when men come of age, they are silly and confused. As men age, they seem to get sillier and more fickle, and their views of women become distorted and bizarre. At least most of the men in this thread. Going by the opinions and advice in this thread, F13 men are the new women. I don't think you guys are the norm. In fact, I'm pretty certain you're not. Some of you need to be pinched really hard, too.
The guys here touting the party line of hookups and frat wet dreams are just doing the job appropriate to the situation. Photek walked into the proverbial bar during Monday Night Football and asked the room what to do about his gf  How many threads do we have about pecs and butts?  |
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Signe
Terracotta Army
Posts: 18942
Muse.
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Going by this thread only, when men come of age, they are silly and confused. As men age, they seem to get sillier and more fickle, and their views of women become distorted and bizarre. At least most of the men in this thread. Going by the opinions and advice in this thread, F13 men are the new women. I don't think you guys are the norm. In fact, I'm pretty certain you're not. Some of you need to be pinched really hard, too.
The guys here touting the party line of hookups and frat wet dreams are just doing the job appropriate to the situation. Photek walked into the proverbial bar during Monday Night Football and asked the room what to do about his gf How many threads do we have about pecs and butts? We should start some. |
My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
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Nebu
Terracotta Army
Posts: 17613
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People (both men and women) act stupid because they are just too desperate to be in a relationship. People need to first learn to be comfortable in their own skin before they can be in any kind of a healthy relationship.
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"Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other."
- Mark Twain
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stray
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Posts: 16818
has an iMac.
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Something to be said for learning the hard way though.
Besides, it's sort of entertaining from a distance. :)
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UnSub
Contributor
Posts: 8064
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Going by the opinions and advice in this thread, F13 men are the new women.
From my experiences, nerds are the most passive aggressive bitches you are going to find anywhere. Especially when it comes to relationships. |
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photek
Terracotta Army
Posts: 618
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Besides, it's sort of entertaining from a distance. :)
Aren't most things ? :) Oh well, I'm really going to put effort into this to last and will take it casually and laidback as many has suggested and cut the /emo. Thing is I'm totally aware of my emoness and the ability to attach myself to women, those few I have attached myself to, have ended in a weird way. 3 and a half year relationship -> she breaks up -> months of emo -> years of not seeing eachother -> meeting again and becoming best friends through the last three or so years. |
"I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away"
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stray
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Posts: 16818
has an iMac.
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Besides, it's sort of entertaining from a distance. :)
Aren't most things ? :) Oh, I didn't actually mean you. Heh. Sorry about that. Being emo is fairly normal. By entertaining, I meant more along the lines of watching girls getting in fights or something. Heh |
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photek
Terracotta Army
Posts: 618
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Oh, I didn't actually mean you. Heh. Sorry about that. Being emo is fairly normal. By entertaining, I meant more along the lines of watching girls getting in fights or something. Heh
Ow hah, I think I understand. If I was watching from the outside I think I'd find my situation a bit entertaining as well, at least a bit  This IS the internet after all! |
"I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away"
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stray
Terracotta Army
Posts: 16818
has an iMac.
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Well, I wouldn't be surprised if everyone goes through what you're doing, at least once. I have. Some people do it a lot, and only learn much later. It's not a big deal though, don't sweat it.
As for ignoring her to grab her attention, I'll tell you this, if your thing with her is founded on games like that, and manipulating the situation to get "her to like you more", that relationship will still eventually be seen for the bullshit it is. It's good to feel something for someone -- don't let any jaded person tell you otherwise. That's bunch of bullshit. But it's got a be a two street you know. Stop fucking around. Just leave. Go on with other things until you find someone whose feelings are mutual. Save your games for something else.
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Oban
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Posts: 4662
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Stop fucking around. Just leave. Go on with other things until you find someone whose feelings are mutual. Save your games for something else.
I disagree with the statement to stop fucking around, he is 24 and needs to fuck around a bit more. Otherwise, I agree with most of what others have posted. The worst thing you can do is play games with someone younger than you. Not only will your relationship be based on manipulation and lies, but you would have also screwed up the younger person's life. Be a man. |
Palin 2012 : Let's go out with a bang!
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pants
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So am I right in assuming that noone's mum got banged here?  |
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Oban
Terracotta Army
Posts: 4662
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Why would anyone seriously want to cause long term psychological and familial relationship damage by fucking a significant-other's relative?
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Palin 2012 : Let's go out with a bang!
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schild
Administrator
Posts: 60350
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Going by the opinions and advice in this thread, F13 men are the new women.
From my experiences, nerds are the most passive aggressive bitches you are going to find anywhere. Especially when it comes to relationships. You're hanging out with the wrong brand of nerd, nerd. |
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photek
Terracotta Army
Posts: 618
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I dont intend playing games with her nor be manipulative in any way (though I am somewhat manipulative in nature), just need a solution for her instant moodswings, I'll just leave her alone when that happens, hence "ignoring" her. I really like the girl otherwise I would never spend this much time on her. I realize I might be her closed alpha test and as I am the first, but she is willing to try and I am dedicated to this. As you said "It has to be a two-way street".
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"I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away"
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pants
Terracotta Army
Posts: 588
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Why would anyone seriously want to cause long term psychological and familial relationship damage by fucking a significant-other's relative?
for teh lulz |
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schild
Administrator
Posts: 60350
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You don't need a solution, you need to drop her like a bad habit. She's 20 man, 20. That should've stopped you to begin with. Though, maybe, when you were 20 you weren't that close to many girls, which would explain your actions in the first place.
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photek
Terracotta Army
Posts: 618
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You don't need a solution, you need to drop her like a bad habit. She's 20 man, 20. That should've stopped you to begin with. Though, maybe, when you were 20 you weren't that close to many girls, which would explain your actions in the first place.
Age of 19->22 = World of Warcraft. Only random hookups. Did I miss something ?  |
"I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away"
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schild
Administrator
Posts: 60350
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Age of 19->22 = World of Warcraft.
I think we found the problem. |
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photek
Terracotta Army
Posts: 618
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Age of 19->22 = World of Warcraft.
I think we found the problem. Fucking Blizzard. Can I sue them for this ? Nah it was written as a joke, I actually had chicks around me, but no serious relationships during that period. Oh wait, I had one while living on campus in a town called Bergen with a chick who goes under the alias Barbie. She used to wait for me to finish raiding before we met during days. Oh the time  Picture of Barbie and that dude is NOT me. PS : She was even older. Thinking about it, I have no idea how I pulled it off, kinda just like now http://photos-a.ak.fbcdn.net/photos-ak-snc1/v311/72/115/721430532/n721430532_4173096_2004.jpg |
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« Last Edit: February 08, 2009, 05:42:08 PM by photek »
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"I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away"
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Signe
Terracotta Army
Posts: 18942
Muse.
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Bergen is where my family is from! Well, just outside. But she couldn't be related to me. No one in my family would ever call themselves "Barbie".
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My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
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photek
Terracotta Army
Posts: 618
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Bergen is where my family is from! Well, just outside. But she couldn't be related to me. No one in my family would ever call themselves "Barbie".
Awesome! I am completely in love with that town, everything from Hardanger to the coast actually. I'm positive she ain't related to you, just the entire thing of setting a compromise like "I raid from 18:00 to 23:00, sometimes later, Ill come over after" and she waiting for me EVERY single day (lived like 5 rooms down my hallway) was kinda win. |
"I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away"
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schild
Administrator
Posts: 60350
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Picture of Barbie and that dude is NOT me. PS : She was even older. Thinking about it, I have no idea how I pulled it off, kinda just like now What's up with the tan in a can? |
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photek
Terracotta Army
Posts: 618
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Picture of Barbie and that dude is NOT me. PS : She was even older. Thinking about it, I have no idea how I pulled it off, kinda just like now What's up with the tan in a can? One of her few shitty habits, along with the freaky Barbie obsession and having to fuck in a pink dormroom, she was pretty decent. Not the best looker, but for gods sake... Waited while I raided, how could I complain about shit like this ? |
"I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away"
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Bstaz
Terracotta Army
Posts: 74
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Obviously you lied when you said you've had many *long term* relationships, if you that was true you'd know what to do here.
Probably what is happening is if she has a messed up history she is resorting to pushing you away, (she may not know how to have a close relationship with a male figure) and, she could be scared and not sure what to do in a relationship (double so if this is her "first" one). She thought it was fun getting serious but now she too is thinking What next? She does not know what to do, so instead of dealing with those new feelings at such a young age it is easier to push you out and find the next guy to get warm first date fuzzies with.
You can... ride it out and not care have fun while you can, you can try to work past her feelings of being scared, or you can walk.
The hardest choice is trying to work past her feelings of uncertainty, you are more likely then not going to get burned in the process or you may end honestly end up being "friends" but for you to be the first guy to work with her through those feelings and end up on the other side with her forever the odds are slim, triple so both of you being the age that you are.
Either way you go treat her with respect and the open communication that you'd want, if she fails to live up to your standards (or a level of standards you are willing to compromise to ) it isn't going to work.
So call her out on her actions and ask her what is going on, sane women like to talk ( and cry a little)
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schild
Administrator
Posts: 60350
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sane women like to talk ( and cry a little) Sanity should not be judged on the basis of being able to communicate at society's lowest standard. On that note, insane women probably talk and cry a lot more than sane ones. Insane guys also. Except the quiet ones, but I just assume they're serial killers or serial killers in training. |
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Azazel
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Just want to say I love this thread. |
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stray
Terracotta Army
Posts: 16818
has an iMac.
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sane women like to talk ( and cry a little) Sanity should not be judged on the basis of being able to communicate at society's lowest standard. On that note, insane women probably talk and cry a lot more than sane ones. Insane guys also. Except the quiet ones, but I just assume they're serial killers or serial killers in training.  |
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Bungee
Terracotta Army
Posts: 897
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Life's hard. Especially once you turned 20...
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Freedom is the raid target. -tazelbain
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NowhereMan
Terracotta Army
Posts: 7353
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living on campus in a town called Bergen
Met a few philosophy students from there at a joint conference last year. Sadly moving universities means I miss out on going back there for when they host it, though by all accounts an awesome place to. Also this thread is just the right mix of   and |
"Look at my car. Do you think that was bought with the earnest love of geeks?" - HaemishM
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UnSub
Contributor
Posts: 8064
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Going by the opinions and advice in this thread, F13 men are the new women.
From my experiences, nerds are the most passive aggressive bitches you are going to find anywhere. Especially when it comes to relationships. You're hanging out with the wrong brand of nerd, nerd. I'm here, aren't I? |
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Signe
Terracotta Army
Posts: 18942
Muse.
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living on campus in a town called Bergen
Met a few philosophy students from there at a joint conference last year. Sadly moving universities means I miss out on going back there for when they host it, though by all accounts an awesome place to. Also this thread is just the right mix of and Bastard woman hater. You forgot  ! Some of us are here too, you know. |
My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
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NowhereMan
Terracotta Army
Posts: 7353
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I have my own brand of understated misogyny |
"Look at my car. Do you think that was bought with the earnest love of geeks?" - HaemishM
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Riggswolfe
Terracotta Army
Posts: 8046
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I dont intend playing games with her nor be manipulative in any way (though I am somewhat manipulative in nature), just need a solution for her instant moodswings, I'll just leave her alone when that happens, hence "ignoring" her. I really like the girl otherwise I would never spend this much time on her. I realize I might be her closed alpha test and as I am the first, but she is willing to try and I am dedicated to this. As you said "It has to be a two-way street".
As a veteran of the kind of relationship you're talking about: She's already "lost" to you. It's not obvious yet because she's basically dithering about it but she's moving on emotionally. Frankly, when you opened yourself to her, and started thinking about long term stuff, you scared her. The more you try to pull her in, the more she's going to push you away. You might be able to salvage this by taking a big step back but I doubt it. Sorry, but I was there several times in my 20s and I recognize the symptoms. |
"We live in a country, where John Lennon takes six bullets in the chest, Yoko Ono was standing right next to him and not one fucking bullet! Explain that to me! Explain that to me, God! Explain it to me, God!" - Denis Leary summing up my feelings about the nature of the universe.
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Lantyssa
Terracotta Army
Posts: 20848
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Geez y'all are jaded and cynical.
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Hahahaha! I'm really good at this!
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Nebu
Terracotta Army
Posts: 17613
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As a veteran of the kind of relationship you're talking about: She's already "lost" to you. It's not obvious yet because she's basically dithering about it but she's moving on emotionally. Frankly, when you opened yourself to her, and started thinking about long term stuff, you scared her. The more you try to pull her in, the more she's going to push you away. You might be able to salvage this by taking a big step back but I doubt it. Sorry, but I was there several times in my 20s and I recognize the symptoms.
This is 100% spot on. Been there, done this as well. These are the woman that you write off and then call you out of the blue two years later. |
"Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other."
- Mark Twain
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