Help. I'm having an identity crisis.

[Checkers]

This forum needs (absolutely does not need) a 'What Are You Thinking?' thread.

P.S. Where can I find pictures of Signe?

[rattran]

P.S. Where can I find pictures of Signe?

Just fire up Left4Dead, she'll be one of the ones charging you from around that dark corner!

[Pennilenko]

"Wanna fuck?" is surprisingly effective, in my experience.

First time i tried that i became married shortly after.

[Jayce]

Jackie - 20 year old Chick

Pros - Has own apartment, cute,  has nice body, no baggage
Cons -  lacking intelligence (understatement), very immature,

I tried this once (low intelligence but nice).  Never again.

Danielle - 30 year old Waitress Divorcee

Pros - Beautiful, Smart, great body
Cons - Dealing with divorce, lives with her grandma (sometimes staying at her ex's), joint custody of her son

FUCKING FLEE

[schild]

I thought "lives with her grandma" was too much. What came after was like "if that didn't stop you before."

[Arnold]

Messenger Bags are in with the kids now, Gulp. I have a messenger-bag murse. It's awesome.

Yeah, I've been using one of those over-the-shoulder bags for years.  I don't take it everywhere all the time, but it goes to work with me everyday.  It carries plenty of stuff, but doesn't feel as encumbering as a backpack does.

[UnSub]

"Wanna fuck?" is surprisingly effective, in my experience.

First time i tried that i became married shortly after.

But the priest had a big smile on his face, amirite? 

The myth that women are asexual creatures who only go to bed with men to get goods is just that. A myth.  They want a good fuck as much as we do.

... and then you marry them and it stops. 

[FatuousTwat]

I now am the proud owner of an 05 Silver Crysler Sebring Sedan.

At least it isn't a convertible.

[Merusk]

The myth that women are asexual creatures who only go to bed with men to get goods is just that. A myth.  They want a good fuck as much as we do.

... and then you marry them and it stops. 

I keep hearing this but sure as shit don't have that problem. I continue to think you all are doing it wrong.

[Hindenburg]

Not even after the first child is born?

[Merusk]

Not even after the first child is born?

I have 2 kids and have been married 10 years. Nope, no problem.

[Grand Design]

Nonononono.  No.

You're just out of a ten year relationship and you're already lining up the next ex Mrs. Slayerik? 

I've been a bachelor for the past ten years and I'm still not ready to give it up.  Just think of all the time you'll have to play EvE!


(And there's nothing gay about your adorable phone, except maybe the buttplug.)

[Nebu]

I've said it before and I'll say it again: Find a woman that can accept you being 100% yourself 100% of the time.  If you can't find that woman, stay single. 

The longer I've been single the more I've enjoyed being single.  That security alone has kept me out of bad relationships.  I've dated a LOT the past 8 years but have only stayed with a couple of the women long enough to really involve them in my life.   

Know what you want.  Don't settle until you have it.  If you can't find it, stay single. 

[Slayerik]

Nonononono.  No.

You're just out of a ten year relationship and you're already lining up the next ex Mrs. Slayerik? 

I've been a bachelor for the past ten years and I'm still not ready to give it up.  Just think of all the time you'll have to play EvE!


(And there's nothing gay about your adorable phone, except maybe the buttplug.)

No i was more griping about texting and tellin' ya all the women and problems I deal with trying to get some poonanny as a singe dude. I'm in no rush. Also, new one...Jessica, Jacqui's friend...21 long ass legs, great body. But she's kind of a bitch. I can deal with that for a while tho ;)

[sigil]

I've said it before and I'll say it again: Find a woman that can accept you being 100% yourself 100% of the time.  If you can't find that woman, stay single. 

The longer I've been single the more I've enjoyed being single.  That security alone has kept me out of bad relationships.  I've dated a LOT the past 8 years but have only stayed with a couple of the women long enough to really involve them in my life.   

Know what you want.  Don't settle until you have it.  If you can't find it, stay single. 

This.

[NiX]

I know girls who go down on random guys for no apparent reason and other dirty stuff like that.

Send PM.

[stray]

You shouldn't necessarily write off someone who has slept around.

[sigil]

 should, however, lower your expectations on someone who does.

[stray]

I just think you're not all that "good" of a guy (or girl), if you see someone as a slut and ignore them for that. It's no different than the so called "bad guys" who see them as sluts too.. except they try to get theirs before ignoring them. While the person in question may have not been intentionally "slutting" it up - they just happen to be in situations where they thought they had something, but the relationships imploded.

[NiX]

I just think you're not all that "good" of a guy (or girl), if you see someone as a slut and ignore them for that. It's no different than the so called "bad guys" who see them as sluts too.. except they try to get theirs before ignoring them. While the person in question may have not been intentionally "slutting" it up - they just happen to be in situations where they thought they had something, but the relationships imploded.

First off, I didn't say I ignore her. I'll never consider dating her for that and many other reasons. Secondly, she did it intentionally with no intention of finding more. Not to mention, who the fuck do you know that finds feelings through the tip of a dick?

[Hindenburg]

What was plural is now singular. Getting interesting 

[NiX]

What was plural is now singular. Getting interesting 

[stray]

I just think you're not all that "good" of a guy (or girl), if you see someone as a slut and ignore them for that. It's no different than the so called "bad guys" who see them as sluts too.. except they try to get theirs before ignoring them. While the person in question may have not been intentionally "slutting" it up - they just happen to be in situations where they thought they had something, but the relationships imploded.

First off, I didn't say I ignore her. I'll never consider dating her for that and many other reasons. Secondly, she did it intentionally with no intention of finding more. Not to mention, who the fuck do you know that finds feelings through the tip of a dick?

Hey, I'm just talking about people who might have slept around, but then complain about their bad luck. Those aren't people who are necessarily sluts. A slut won't be complaining generally.

You now say this chick has "no intention of finding more", but yet, you talk about others above who "wonder why they can't find a good guy". These aren't really one and the same category of woman. So I'm confused now.

[Slayerik]

From the last few weeks, I am reminded of a line my uncle once said. "If they didn't have a pussy, there'd be a bounty on their heads."

I just say this cause my head hurts from young women these days. I am rusty. Back in the day I could deal with just about anything on the pathway to getting laid, nowadays I find myself quickly annoyed, bored, and not giving a fuck.

[rk47]

From the last few weeks, I am reminded of a line my uncle once said. "If they didn't have a pussy, there'd be a bounty on their heads."

I just say this cause my head hurts from young women these days. I am rusty. Back in the day I could deal with just about anything on the pathway to getting laid, nowadays I find myself quickly annoyed, bored, and not giving getting a fuck.

[Slayerik]

Well played, sir.

[Bunk]

Just wanted to say that I've been away for a week with the flu - and this was an outstanding thread to come back to.

[Cyrrex]

I haven't been around much lately, either, but this thread is sure making up for that lost time.  I'm now seriously considering going out and purchasing my own homosexual texting device, as well as take advantage of some GM Employee Pricing.  You're living the dream, Slayerik.

[Signe]

I don't believe any of this.  I think you are all having millions of tiny little strokes.  You should all get off the computer and see a doctor.

[Engels]

I don't believe any of this.  I think you are all having millions oftiny little strokes stroking your tiny little things.  You should all get off the computer and see a doctor.

[Grand Design]

But only after four hours, right?

[Slayerik]

I don't believe any of this.  I think you are all having millions oftiny little strokes stroking your tiny little things.  You should all get off the computer and see a doctor.

Well played, sir.

[tazelbain]

This thread is glib.

[Slayerik]

So today I pussed out on talking to a gorgeous woman.

Here's a little more background on me, I work at a University Hospital doing Desktop support. Contrary to popular belief, some of us aren't like Nick Burns....your company's computer guy :)

So I grab a cafeteria pizza, find a table with a discarded newpaper, and have a seat. I notice a small pack of what looks to be med students to my left...they have some kinda lab coat thing going. A few good looking chicks. Nice spot choice I tell myself.

Just beyond them, at the table next to them is a Mila Kunis looking blue-eyed brunette sent straight from the heavens. She has books around her and seems to be studying and talkin with the lab coated ladies. I catch a look and do the instant 'look-away-like-a-giant-pussy' thing. I continue eating and eventually look back that way and bam! She is like staring at me. I make it about 3 seconds this time before the power that is this girl's baby blue eyes kick in and I go back to eating.

Here is where I always fuck up. I never approach (well, when I'm sober). I come up with some decent icebreaker line, but never make the move. 5 minutes later I kick myself in the ass and call myself all sorts of names. I know I have nothing to lose but my pride (which is overated anyway) but I still can't pull the trigger.

In my defense, this young woman was a knockout. She probably had a ring anyway, but fuck me for pussin' out. I have never been good at approaching random good looking strangers. Any tips? (besides 'Grow a pair') . EDIT: Looking for scoring advice on an intarweb forum is bad, m-kay! :)  But fuck it, killing time at work

[IainC]

Any tips? (besides 'Grow a pair')

Erm.. don't say that to them. Never goes well for me.