Dwarf Fortress: The dwarvening

[Yegolev]

Remove any hauling tasks by your farmers except maybe food to see if that gets them moving.  Also make sure to toggle cooking off for seeds in the kitchen menu.  (z -> kitchen)

There isn't anything to haul since no one is doing anything, but I'll turn that off anyway.  I don't have a kitchen, so they would not have cooked the seeds.  Specifically I am talking about plump helmet seeds.

I am truly impressed that no one has died so far, what with the lack of shelter until mid-fall, lack of kitchen, lack of booze... lack of anything.  I told those assholes NO ONE GETS ANYTHING UNTIL YOU MAKE SOME CHARCOAL and I meant it.

[Ironwood]

OH FOR FUCKS SAKE.

Engraving still sucks total fucking ass.

I had a lovely set of bedrooms, but I needed to engrave to improve the quality.

Fuck.  It's like a collision in an ASCII factory.

Fuck that.

[Ironwood]

Ah, Sorry, you can toggle it off.  Works really well.

I am a dumbass.

[dusematic]

This is the best thing ever.  I enjoy reading it, so thanks for taking the time.  This is an ideal game for me, except I am painfully aware that it would be beyond my ken.  If only they would make usability, interface, and basic graphical representations a priority, then I would immediately jump in.  I look forward to the day when/if they do.  Until then, your saga is all I have!

[FatuousTwat]

Remove any hauling tasks by your farmers except maybe food to see if that gets them moving.  Also make sure to toggle cooking off for seeds in the kitchen menu.  (z -> kitchen)

There isn't anything to haul since no one is doing anything, but I'll turn that off anyway.  I don't have a kitchen, so they would not have cooked the seeds.  Specifically I am talking about plump helmet seeds.

I am truly impressed that no one has died so far, what with the lack of shelter until mid-fall, lack of kitchen, lack of booze... lack of anything.  I told those assholes NO ONE GETS ANYTHING UNTIL YOU MAKE SOME CHARCOAL and I meant it.

You have to turn on Wood Burning (it's off by default).

[bhodi]

Ah, Sorry, you can toggle it off.  Works really well.

You can also edit the ini file, there's an option to turn it off by default.

Lant: You've become a ranger (from animal dissector). Better at hunting. You're bringing in quite the stocks of meat!

[bhodi]

Episode Four: Progeny and Projects (part 2)

Oh, the elves arrive again to trade! It's the same caravan leader. I'd know his snooty attitude and pointed ears anywhere. Well, maybe they'll sing a different tune...



When they have to walk through fresh goblin vomit and entrails! The guards easily dispatch the hostiles, losing only a dog who was caught in the melee, and in celebration they leave the bodies right in the corridor to be run or walked over. Dwarves don't believe in cleanliness, so expect to see those bodies there come NEXT spring.

I trade the elves the last 6 bins of my rock instruments (minus the bins, of course). After demanding 5000 profit, I manage to convince the bastard to take them. In exchange, I get more wood, leather, and cloth. We'll see if they come back next year.

Right after they leave, our yearly batch of young wastrels arrive!



And with it, of course, comes more room for nobles at the top. Before he can even get inside, one of the new dwarves starts blubbering about shiny glass and baubles and then stands in the field looking confused. Good luck there, guy.

One of these recruits looks familiar... Maybe a brother of somebody?



The worthless pesants are rounded up, shoved crossbows, and told to go practice until they can hit something other than themselves or their fellow dwarves.



For some reason, they absolutely refuse to practice. I'm not sure why, as they have crossbows and bolts and targets in the barracks; I'll have to cut their rations until they listen to reason. Merusk is accidentally shoved a crossbow and herded in with the rest, but after smashing several by trying to use them as improvised picks, he is dishonorably discharged from the military.

Oh, look who's getting uppity again. With a whole 50 dwarves in the settlement, Mr. Fancybritches not only demands better rooms, but, like all good despots, makes an unreasonable mandate:



I can only assume this is so that he can jail the undesirables with impunity, as we have no lay pewter at all.


Sure enough, that poor deranged guy outside finally snaps, hauls off and hits the nearest moving thing  - Lantyssa.



She sustains a minor injury to her forearm and runs inside to get help. Before "help" could arrive to "subdue" the insane dwarf, yet another goblin raiding party takes care of that little problem themselves:



Fare thee well, noble dwarf. We barely knew thee. No, really, you never even made it inside. If it's any consolation, the goblins were quickly dispatched by our now seasoned veteran wrestlers.

Things are quiet for a time. Work continues on the great construction project:



The humans arrive to trade. We shift from our previous source of income, rock instruments, to our new source of income:



Absolutely everything that was carried, worn, or wielded by the goblin raiders or any other hostiles unlucky enough to wander near. As you can see, we've accumulated quite a lot in a very short time. Enough to buy out almost everything they have brought with them. This will be our income for the next few years and will supplement it for the foreseeable future. Unfortunately, the elves require clean weapons and clothes - the humans and dwarves will take pretty much anything.

If I've missed you, speak up so you too can grow fat, lazy, and die of old age under the hedonistic rule of a benevolent and wise leader.

[Trippy]

I'm very pleased that I'm ensconced away at my desk working on my letterforms while the rest of you have to deal with "the real world"

[UnSub]

May I live longer than I lived last time.

[cironian]

Feel free to add me as a Stonecrafter or Metalsmith guy. Or any crafting profession really.

[Hoth]

If there is some sort of lurker profession I would be honored to become one of your easy disposable dwarven slaves.

Strangely addictive this game is when read. When played it feels like some sort of Ascii inferno on my screen.
 

[FatuousTwat]

I DEMAND WE FIND ADAMANTINE! (just predicting my strange mood)

[Merusk]

That wee thing looked like a pick.  I thought it was some damned elven creation with as flimsy and weak as it was.  How was I to know what to do with it?  I hit things all day! Give me a good axe, then I'll show you some proper hitting... on some rocks!

[Lantyssa]

Why do I attract all the crazies?!

[Merusk]

Karma?  Maybe you were a crazy in another life and now you get to experience the other side.

[Yoru]

This is hilarious. Oh dwarf fortress.

[Fargull]

Want you to know I love and hate you all.  The damn thread has pushed me over that edge of going "How the fuck can someone understand the damn interface!" to "Holy shit this is cool!"

[Slyfeind]

Wow. I'm digging this game hardcore right now...except I got to the point in the wiki tutorial where it says "Assign some crops to your farms!" And I have no idea how to do that. What is the succession of keys that I press on my keyboard to make them Plump Helmets? EDIT: Oh crap, nevermind, it's the + and - keys. YAY DWARVES!

[bhodi]

The + and - keys navigate most menus.

[grebo]

Wow. I'm digging this game hardcore right now...except I got to the point in the wiki tutorial where it says "Assign some crops to your farms!" And I have no idea how to do that. What is the succession of keys that I press on my keyboard to make them Plump Helmets? EDIT: Oh crap, nevermind, it's the + and - keys. YAY DWARVES!

Don't forget to assign crops for each season. (a,b,c,d)

[Ironwood]

Dammit, now I know what flashing water means.

Seal the doors.  Those 7 in there are dead already.

 

[Lantyssa]

Did you tunnel into water?

[Murgos]

Seal the doors.  Those 7 in there are dead already.

You built a submarine?

[Yegolev]

You have to turn on Wood Burning (it's off by default).

It's great how you say that but don't tell me how.  Good thing I got Dwarf Manager for such emergencies.

[Ironwood]

Did you tunnel into water?

Did I ever.  I think they've tweaked the pressure rules also;  it filled up this massive room faster than Honda.

Alas, 4 of the men didn't make it out.

[Teleku]

Just an additional note, if you run into flashing red, REALLY make sure you stop  .

[FatuousTwat]

You have to turn on Wood Burning (it's off by default).

It's great how you say that but don't tell me how.  Good thing I got Dwarf Manager for such emergencies.

I was the one who mentioned DM in the first place!

[Ironwood]

Further learning :  When you make an engraved and awesome circular tomb area to house your honored dead kings, be careful;  those fuckers put cows and sheep in there.

 

[Lantyssa]

Yeah, make sure you turn off pets.  I think there's a setting you can make in the ini that turns pet burial off by default, because my latest game where I started with a fresh ini is the only one where I had to actively do it.  I did make a pet cemetary for my game though.  I figure if I bury them where I know then there's less chance of muffy getting the good tomb.

Edit:

[COFFIN_NO_PETS_DEFAULT:YES]

That should fix it in the init.ini.  I went to look it up since I don't want it either.

[Ironwood]

Yeah, I know now.  I can't seem to disinter them tho.

Here Lies Thrain, King Under The Mountain. Bharak Khazad, Khazad Ai-Menu

Here Lies Florence.  She Was A Good Cow.

*Sigh*

[Sophismata]

Dwarves will only practice with wooden or bone bolts - they won't waste metal ammunition.

Also, the cats being injured thing is a bug, caused by cats trying to pick up things they've killed. Cats don't have hands, however, thus the injured message: http://dwarf.lendemaindeveille.com/index.php/Cat_cancels_Store_Item_in_Stockpile:_Too_injured.

[Slyfeind]

Put me down as anything, too. Damn, I didn't realize what they meant by "Losing is fun" until one of my dwarves died and I had to have a little burial for him. That, plus putting a butcher near the dining room got kind of stinky.

[Yoru]

Damn, I didn't realize what they meant by "Losing is fun" until one of my dwarves died and I had to have a little burial for him. That, plus putting a butcher near the dining room got kind of stinky.

Did these two things have anything to do with one another? 

[Lantyssa]

Soylent Green is Dwarves!

[Slyfeind]

Damn, I didn't realize what they meant by "Losing is fun" until one of my dwarves died and I had to have a little burial for him. That, plus putting a butcher near the dining room got kind of stinky.

Did these two things have anything to do with one another? 

Hah, no, the butcher spilled blood and guts out the door before the other guy died. But I thought about butchering him. Mmm dwarfjerky!