Ironwood
Terracotta Army
Posts: 28240
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It's what the Princess who couldn't guess Rumpelstiltskin guessed.
She was cursed to live out a shitty storyline for the rest of her life.
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"Mr Soft Owl has Seen Some Shit." - Sun Tzu
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calapine
Terracotta Army
Posts: 7352
Solely responsible for the thread on "The Condom Wall."
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I think someone with writing skill should do a "The world's literature classics if they had been written by Metzen". That would be fun.
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Restoration is a perfectly valid school of magic!
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Paelos
Contributor
Posts: 27075
Error 404: Title not found.
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Hansel and Gretel by Metzen:
Hansel and Gretel were kicked out of their house by their parents because they didn't have enough gear and were a giant drag on the family DPS. So they wandered out to the woods trying to find quests but ran into an old witch who lived in a candy house. The witch used to be the best candy maker in all the land, but over time she'd be driven insane by the Old Gods and laid a candy trap in the woods for unsuspecting children. Hansel and Gretel of course fell into the trap and were caged while the witch fattened them up with pies. When they got the chance, they shoved the old witch in an oven, but this was only a setback. The witch emerged more powerful and angry and like covered in weird flames while standing 100 feet tall. Hansel and Gretel then assembled 23 of their friends to try to combat this menace, but to win they needed to the power of togetherness and love taught to them by an old green orc who didn't give his name.
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CPA, CFO, Sports Fan, Game when I have the time
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Ironwood
Terracotta Army
Posts: 28240
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I am. The Warchief.
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"Mr Soft Owl has Seen Some Shit." - Sun Tzu
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Merusk
Terracotta Army
Posts: 27449
Badge Whore
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I enjoyed how you worked-in, '... this was only a setback.'
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The past cannot be changed. The future is yet within your power.
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Yegolev
Moderator
Posts: 24440
2/10 WOULD NOT INGEST
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I haven't gone to court to argue against a traffic ticket before, so I might end up learning a lot by end of day Wednesday. I've already requested discovery via mail and gotten nothing, so I'll request a motion for discovery and see how that goes.
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Why am I homeless? Why do all you motherfuckers need homes is the real question. They called it The Prayer, its answer was law Mommy come back 'cause the water's all gone
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Merusk
Terracotta Army
Posts: 27449
Badge Whore
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I'm suddenly having visions of a 3-legged argument and you in a plaid suit.
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The past cannot be changed. The future is yet within your power.
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Ironwood
Terracotta Army
Posts: 28240
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I got that one.
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"Mr Soft Owl has Seen Some Shit." - Sun Tzu
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Yegolev
Moderator
Posts: 24440
2/10 WOULD NOT INGEST
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SIGH
That does bring up the question of what to wear. I figure cargo shorts and a plain t-shirt will paint the picture that I don't want to pay $288 to the city of Hogansville.
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Why am I homeless? Why do all you motherfuckers need homes is the real question. They called it The Prayer, its answer was law Mommy come back 'cause the water's all gone
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Rasix
Moderator
Posts: 15024
I am the harbinger of your doom!
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Orange Tux might paint an entire different yet favorable picture.
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-Rasix
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Yegolev
Moderator
Posts: 24440
2/10 WOULD NOT INGEST
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That I am willing to waste $288 on anything?
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Why am I homeless? Why do all you motherfuckers need homes is the real question. They called it The Prayer, its answer was law Mommy come back 'cause the water's all gone
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Ironwood
Terracotta Army
Posts: 28240
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"Mr Soft Owl has Seen Some Shit." - Sun Tzu
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ghost
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Don't they just have an attorney there that will go in and get deferred adjudication on the case for roughly that amount of money?
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Samwise
Moderator
Posts: 19324
sentient yeast infection
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Don't they just have an attorney there that will go in and get deferred adjudication on the case for roughly that amount of money?
Depends on how psycho and/or desperate for money the town of Hogansville is. My mother, who is an attorney, wasted a good deal of time on fighting a bogus ticket she was issued in some bumfuck central CA town that had no other source of revenue and was really reluctant to let her off the hook; they did things like demand she show up in person and then change the court date after she'd already made the two hour drive, etc. If she'd been billing for all that wasted time would have come to orders of magnitude more than the actual ticket was worth, but it was an "it's the principle, not the money" kind of thing. She did ultimately prevail, but if your goal is to save time and money, just pay the ticket and consider it a tourism tax for visiting their lovely town. 
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ghost
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Or just take a defensive driving course?
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Samwise
Moderator
Posts: 19324
sentient yeast infection
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Or just take a defensive driving course?
I hope you remember this post every time I dickishly reference it over the next five years or so. 
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Salamok
Terracotta Army
Posts: 2803
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Don't they just have an attorney there that will go in and get deferred adjudication on the case for roughly that amount of money?
Don't go all hardline and dispute it just ask for deferred adjudication. Not sure how it works in your neck of the woods but I know a fellow in Texas that has 2 or 3 deferred adjudication traffic infractions working in different counties at any given time. Then again I seem to recall a key aspect of his system involving paying the fine and then having the ticket disappear, this may not be what you are going for. edit: The beauty of being a law abiding citizen is having the luxury of being a dick on minor shit like this. My defense on my next ticket will likely be "your honor I honestly don't know what to think the first thing the officer did after he pulled me over was to offer to lie on my behalf and only write me up for doing 68 after he clocked me doing 72, I swear when last I looked I was only doing 65!"
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« Last Edit: September 09, 2013, 09:10:01 PM by Salamok »
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ghost
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Or just take a defensive driving course?
I hope you remember this post every time I dickishly reference it over the next five years or so.  Dude, I can't remember yesterday. 
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Ironwood
Terracotta Army
Posts: 28240
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You were wearing your blue jumper.
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"Mr Soft Owl has Seen Some Shit." - Sun Tzu
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Yegolev
Moderator
Posts: 24440
2/10 WOULD NOT INGEST
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I'm getting very close to the threshold with the ticket. I'm not saying $288 isn't a lot of money, but between work and baseball and the wife, I'm not willing to go to enormous expense on my part just to prove a point. Today is decision day, and if I don't have a real chance of avoiding it, I'll just pay online today and not tour the Hogansville court system tomorrow.
One thing that I did learn is that Georgia courts ignore requests for discovery for anything less than a felony. This doesn't really sound constitutional to me, but as I said in the previous sentence: I'm not in here to prove a point or even say much.
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Why am I homeless? Why do all you motherfuckers need homes is the real question. They called it The Prayer, its answer was law Mommy come back 'cause the water's all gone
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Yegolev
Moderator
Posts: 24440
2/10 WOULD NOT INGEST
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Clerk called, says she is mailing my shit today, arraignment postponed to Oct 9. This is enough of a victory for me. Assuming, of course, that she actually does this and I don't get a "failure to appear". That would be awful.
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Why am I homeless? Why do all you motherfuckers need homes is the real question. They called it The Prayer, its answer was law Mommy come back 'cause the water's all gone
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ghost
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I guess I missed the explanation, but why are you bothering with all of this?
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Pennilenko
Terracotta Army
Posts: 3472
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I guess I missed the explanation, but why are you bothering with all of this?
Because the man wears an orange tuxedo.
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"See? All of you are unique. And special. Like fucking snowflakes." -- Signe
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Signe
Terracotta Army
Posts: 18942
Muse.
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Don't give in! You shouldn't have to be rich to be prove a justifiable point. Find poor people options and if there aren't any, occupy them or something. Gordon once beat a parking ticket in England and no one ever wins anything in England. England is even worse than Connecticut.
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My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
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Yegolev
Moderator
Posts: 24440
2/10 WOULD NOT INGEST
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I guess I missed the explanation, but why are you bothering with all of this?
I didn't explain it. I don't have dentist-money, though, and $288 is bullshit. I'm sure I'll have to pay anyway, but if I can cause Hogansville to spend some of the profit from their speedtraps then I'll feel better in the end. Don't give in! You shouldn't have to be rich to be prove a justifiable point. Find poor people options and if there aren't any, occupy them or something. Gordon once beat a parking ticket in England and no one ever wins anything in England. England is even worse than Connecticut.
Oh, well, see... the thing is that I don't have the free time of either the rich or the poor. I'm also not really a weasel, so what worked for Gordon might not work for me.
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Why am I homeless? Why do all you motherfuckers need homes is the real question. They called it The Prayer, its answer was law Mommy come back 'cause the water's all gone
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ghost
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Yeah, you're kind of fucked. I don't think you're going to get anywhere by contesting it.
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Yegolev
Moderator
Posts: 24440
2/10 WOULD NOT INGEST
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I can't understate how nice it feels that I caused a reschedule of an arraignment. I was also listening to a football game while attending my son's baseball game, so I'm feeling very American today.
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Why am I homeless? Why do all you motherfuckers need homes is the real question. They called it The Prayer, its answer was law Mommy come back 'cause the water's all gone
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Merusk
Terracotta Army
Posts: 27449
Badge Whore
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Oh, well, see... the thing is that I don't have the free time of either the rich or the poor. I'm also not really a weasel, so what worked for Gordon might not work for me.
I dunno, I always saw you as a Mustelidae member, but more of an Otter.
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The past cannot be changed. The future is yet within your power.
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Yegolev
Moderator
Posts: 24440
2/10 WOULD NOT INGEST
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Why am I homeless? Why do all you motherfuckers need homes is the real question. They called it The Prayer, its answer was law Mommy come back 'cause the water's all gone
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Ingmar
Terracotta Army
Posts: 19280
Auto Assault Affectionado
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This is all easily avoided by never being the fastest guy on the road, just saying.
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The Transcendent One: AH... THE ROGUE CONSTRUCT. Nordom: Sense of closure: imminent.
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ghost
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This is all easily avoided by never being the fastest guy on the road, just saying.
That all depends on where your driving and what color you happen to be.
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schild
Administrator
Posts: 60350
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It's true. If you're Mexican and in a minivan or truck driving the speed limit in the southern highways and roads of Arizona, prepare to get pulled over.
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Ingmar
Terracotta Army
Posts: 19280
Auto Assault Affectionado
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Right, but presumably you don't get a speeding ticket for that.
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The Transcendent One: AH... THE ROGUE CONSTRUCT. Nordom: Sense of closure: imminent.
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ghost
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Or in Texas you might get shot for that.
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Strazos
Greetings from the Slave Coast
Posts: 15542
The World's Worst Game: Curry or Covid
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So I somehow turned $500 into $1100 in about 2 hours at the craps table on Sunday before my flight back out. If you count my buddies who I spotted $100 each, we turned $700 into something like $2300. Now I just need to figure out where to play in Vegas next time I'm out there - I thought we had a craps thread at some point, but it's been lost to the sands of time. 
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Fear the Backstab! "Plato said the virtuous man is at all times ready for a grammar snake attack." - we are lesion "Hell is other people." -Sartre
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