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f13.net  |  f13.net General Forums  |  General Discussion  |  Serious Business  |  Topic: Useless Conversation 0 Members and 18 Guests are viewing this topic.
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Author Topic: Useless Conversation  (Read 4201200 times)
voodoolily
Contributor
Posts: 5348

Finnuh, munnuh, muhfuh, I enjoy creating new written vernacular, s'all.


WWW
Reply #840 on: May 21, 2007, 01:33:11 PM


Voodoo & Sauce - a blog.
The Legend of Zephyr - a different blog.
bhodi
Moderator
Posts: 6817

No lie.


Reply #841 on: May 21, 2007, 01:46:23 PM

omfg you are not kidding. That is my new favorite website.
« Last Edit: May 21, 2007, 01:49:40 PM by bhodi »
Furiously
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Posts: 7199


WWW
Reply #842 on: May 21, 2007, 01:59:31 PM

I found one for Strazos....

Nebu
Terracotta Army
Posts: 17613


Reply #843 on: May 21, 2007, 02:12:02 PM

I think this was my favorite Mother's Day card.


"Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other."

-  Mark Twain
WayAbvPar
Moderator
Posts: 19270


Reply #844 on: May 21, 2007, 02:16:40 PM


Thanks for wasting 45 minutes of my day. Very funny stuff.

When speaking of the MMOG industry, the glass may be half full, but it's full of urine. HaemishM

Always wear clean underwear because you never know when a Tory Government is going to fuck you.- Ironwood

Libertarians make fun of everyone because they can't see beyond the event horizons of their own assholes Surlyboi
MrHat
Terracotta Army
Posts: 7432

Out of the frying pan, into the fire.


Reply #845 on: May 22, 2007, 07:00:26 AM

Hah, good times.
Signe
Terracotta Army
Posts: 18942

Muse.


Reply #846 on: May 22, 2007, 08:52:06 AM

My hayfever eyes itch so bad I could gouge them out with my own fingers!    undecided

My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
WayAbvPar
Moderator
Posts: 19270


Reply #847 on: May 22, 2007, 10:01:09 AM




Best I can do for now.

When speaking of the MMOG industry, the glass may be half full, but it's full of urine. HaemishM

Always wear clean underwear because you never know when a Tory Government is going to fuck you.- Ironwood

Libertarians make fun of everyone because they can't see beyond the event horizons of their own assholes Surlyboi
Furiously
Terracotta Army
Posts: 7199


WWW
Reply #848 on: May 22, 2007, 11:46:33 AM

My hayfever eyes itch so bad I could gouge them out with my own fingers!    undecided

Your talk of gouging out this Hay Fever guy's eyes makes me rethink the zombie thing.

Sky
Terracotta Army
Posts: 32117

I love my TV an' hug my TV an' call it 'George'.


Reply #849 on: May 23, 2007, 08:38:17 AM

Oh, she's a zombie. No doubt. Besides...I think she's using code words for smokey mcpot eyes.

I'm giving this one to my girlfriend next month:

Signe
Terracotta Army
Posts: 18942

Muse.


Reply #850 on: May 23, 2007, 09:39:40 AM

So I'm watching the news and they're talking about this really cool new over the counter diet pill.  It works in your intestines and cuts the amount of fat from food.  I take some meds that cause weight gain and make it difficult to lose so I'm thinking, "Yay!  Maybe this will make it easier for me!"  They even say it seems pretty harmless and the side effects aren't dangerous.  I go online to read about the side effects and one of them is anal leakage.  ANAL LEAKAGE???  What the bloody hell kind of side effect is that?  What ever happened to drowsiness, headache and liver failure???  NO THANK YOU!  I guess I'll just carry on carrying on.

(sorry, WAP.  I know you don't like words such as "leakage" and "discharge."   undecided)

My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
WayAbvPar
Moderator
Posts: 19270


Reply #851 on: May 23, 2007, 09:41:38 AM

Maybe it will catch on and we can go into the ass tampon business and make millions!

When speaking of the MMOG industry, the glass may be half full, but it's full of urine. HaemishM

Always wear clean underwear because you never know when a Tory Government is going to fuck you.- Ironwood

Libertarians make fun of everyone because they can't see beyond the event horizons of their own assholes Surlyboi
Furiously
Terracotta Army
Posts: 7199


WWW
Reply #852 on: May 23, 2007, 10:04:02 AM

I'd put your patent in TODAY!

Signe
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Muse.


Reply #853 on: May 23, 2007, 10:05:50 AM

I wonder how often your wives smack you two on the back of your silly heads?

My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
Murgos
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Posts: 7474


Reply #854 on: May 23, 2007, 10:06:37 AM

Maybe it will catch on and we can go into the ass tampon business and make millions!

New!  Asspons from Asspax!  At stores everywhere!

"You have all recieved youre last warning. I am in the process of currently tracking all of youre ips and pinging your home adressess. you should not have commencemed a war with me" - Aaron Rayburn
Signe
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Posts: 18942

Muse.


Reply #855 on: May 23, 2007, 10:08:16 AM

This is like a snowball getting bigger and bigger til it's a snow boulder then a snow planet destryong cities and smushing millions of people dead.  That's what you men are like.   

My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
Furiously
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Posts: 7199


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Reply #856 on: May 23, 2007, 10:14:29 AM

I wonder how often your wives smack you two on the back of your silly heads?

Way's wife knows better. I'm sure she heard the "Thunder of 87".

Mine - she just goes for the funsack.

Merusk
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Badge Whore


Reply #857 on: May 23, 2007, 10:17:57 AM

...

In other useless news, my son frightens my wife and myself at times.  When he was 2 1/2 and wanted attention from mom rather than dad he'd figured out to turn-off his mom's computer at the power strip rather than the power button, which had been moved out of his reach due to his love of turning it on/ off whenever he felt like it.  (Neither of us use this method, so no idea where he learned it.)

A few months later, we found out he was getting up at 3:30~5:00am, creeping downstairs and turning on the TV so he could play the Gamecube.  When the TV wasn't on the input screen, he'd change the channel to Disney or Cartoon Network and watch those until he fell asleep and we'd find him the next morning.

Then, earlier today I got a call from my wife saying that he'd gone upstairs, turned on the kid's machine and opened the browser to Cartoon Network.com so he could play some of the flash games.  He's 3 1/2 and (to my knowledge) can't read.  I can't fucking figure out how he managed to do this.  As of right now, I suspect that my daughter has a shortcut or has managed to reset the home page to CN.  

If I find out neither is the case when I go home, I'm locking the bedroom doors at night.

The past cannot be changed. The future is yet within your power.
Yegolev
Moderator
Posts: 24440

2/10 WOULD NOT INGEST


WWW
Reply #858 on: May 23, 2007, 01:11:48 PM

ANAL LEAKAGE???  What the bloody hell kind of side effect is that?  What ever happened to drowsiness, headache and liver failure???  NO THANK YOU!

Did you go to sleep with a Robin Williams LP playing?

Mine - she just goes for the funsack.

Ah, yes, mine gets right to it as well.

Why am I homeless?  Why do all you motherfuckers need homes is the real question.
They called it The Prayer, its answer was law
Mommy come back 'cause the water's all gone
Sky
Terracotta Army
Posts: 32117

I love my TV an' hug my TV an' call it 'George'.


Reply #859 on: May 23, 2007, 01:59:47 PM

Remember potato chips with..olestra? Uncontrollable oily anal discharge and gas. Yum.
Lantyssa
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Posts: 20848


Reply #860 on: May 23, 2007, 02:18:03 PM

You too can simulate the effects of being celiac!  (It also involves stabbing yourself with an icepick to get the full effect, but that's a minor detail.)

Hahahaha!  I'm really good at this!
Signe
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Posts: 18942

Muse.


Reply #861 on: May 23, 2007, 09:48:49 PM

I miss Humpergroove.   cry

My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
schild
Administrator
Posts: 60350


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Reply #862 on: May 23, 2007, 10:07:00 PM



I expect MMOG companies to use this one.

A lot.

Edit: These have to be done by the Get Your War On/My New Filing Technique is Unstoppable guy. Or at least inspired by...
squirrel
Contributor
Posts: 1767


Reply #863 on: May 23, 2007, 11:42:15 PM


Speaking of marketing, we're out of milk.
Ironwood
Terracotta Army
Posts: 28240


Reply #864 on: May 24, 2007, 12:48:45 AM

...

In other useless news, my son frightens my wife and myself at times.  When he was 2 1/2 and wanted attention from mom rather than dad he'd figured out to turn-off his mom's computer at the power strip rather than the power button, which had been moved out of his reach due to his love of turning it on/ off whenever he felt like it.  (Neither of us use this method, so no idea where he learned it.)

A few months later, we found out he was getting up at 3:30~5:00am, creeping downstairs and turning on the TV so he could play the Gamecube.  When the TV wasn't on the input screen, he'd change the channel to Disney or Cartoon Network and watch those until he fell asleep and we'd find him the next morning.

Then, earlier today I got a call from my wife saying that he'd gone upstairs, turned on the kid's machine and opened the browser to Cartoon Network.com so he could play some of the flash games.  He's 3 1/2 and (to my knowledge) can't read.  I can't fucking figure out how he managed to do this.  As of right now, I suspect that my daughter has a shortcut or has managed to reset the home page to CN.  

If I find out neither is the case when I go home, I'm locking the bedroom doors at night.


This needs to be removed from Useless Conversation : That's an awesome wee anecdote that has me smiling AND scared for the future.

"Mr Soft Owl has Seen Some Shit." - Sun Tzu
Signe
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Muse.


Reply #865 on: May 24, 2007, 05:18:20 AM

Don't bother, Merusk.  He'll probably just use his sidekick.

My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
Strazos
Greetings from the Slave Coast
Posts: 15542

The World's Worst Game: Curry or Covid


Reply #866 on: May 24, 2007, 09:04:18 AM


Fear the Backstab!
"Plato said the virtuous man is at all times ready for a grammar snake attack." - we are lesion
"Hell is other people." -Sartre
Merusk
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Badge Whore


Reply #867 on: May 24, 2007, 09:15:11 AM

Don't bother, Merusk.  He'll probably just use his sidekick.

Zod needs no sidekicks!

There was no shortcut on the machine.  Fucking-a I'm locking my doors before the little bugger starts building bombs or something.

The past cannot be changed. The future is yet within your power.
Signe
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Posts: 18942

Muse.


Reply #868 on: May 24, 2007, 09:18:41 AM

Zod's dad should get with the times!!




My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
Ironwood
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Posts: 28240


Reply #869 on: May 24, 2007, 09:21:23 AM

You're quite right.  Have her sent round and she can KNEEL.

"Mr Soft Owl has Seen Some Shit." - Sun Tzu
Sky
Terracotta Army
Posts: 32117

I love my TV an' hug my TV an' call it 'George'.


Reply #870 on: May 24, 2007, 01:01:57 PM

Have her sent round and she can KNEEL.
Heh.
Lantyssa
Terracotta Army
Posts: 20848


Reply #871 on: May 24, 2007, 01:18:57 PM

There was no shortcut on the machine.  Fucking-a I'm locking my doors before the little bugger starts building bombs or something.
I'd recommend letting him come into the room anytime he wants.  You need to foster his like for you, else he'll just blow the door knob off.  Besides, don't you want your son to be ruler of the world?  Think of the perks!

Hahahaha!  I'm really good at this!
Trippy
Administrator
Posts: 23657


Reply #872 on: May 24, 2007, 05:57:05 PM

There was no shortcut on the machine.  Fucking-a I'm locking my doors before the little bugger starts building bombs or something.
He probably figured out how to access the browser URL history.
Signe
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Muse.


Reply #873 on: May 25, 2007, 04:14:41 PM

I'm considering buying a 360 just so I can play Viva Pinata.  Someone talk me out of it.

My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
Righ
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Posts: 6542

Teaching the world Google-fu one broken dream at a time.


Reply #874 on: May 25, 2007, 05:21:15 PM

That seems like the sort of game that should require a Wiimote.

The camera adds a thousand barrels. - Steven Colbert
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