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f13.net  |  f13.net General Forums  |  General Discussion  |  Serious Business  |  Topic: Gee, I wonder what this will get used for... 0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.
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Author Topic: Gee, I wonder what this will get used for...  (Read 28879 times)
Bunk
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Posts: 5828

Operating Thetan One


on: June 14, 2005, 12:09:49 PM

From worldofwarcraft.com frontpage:

Quote
To celebrate the launch of the Battlegrounds System, Blizzard is giving away a rare, life-size mannequin of a Night Elf female.

I know there is a realdoll joke to be made here, but i just don't have the motivation to try.

"Welcome to the internet, pussy." - VDL
"I have retard strength." - Schild
WayAbvPar
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Reply #1 on: June 14, 2005, 12:10:30 PM

Jesus. That poor thing is gonna get humped to flinders.

When speaking of the MMOG industry, the glass may be half full, but it's full of urine. HaemishM

Always wear clean underwear because you never know when a Tory Government is going to fuck you.- Ironwood

Libertarians make fun of everyone because they can't see beyond the event horizons of their own assholes Surlyboi
Paelos
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Reply #2 on: June 14, 2005, 12:11:25 PM

Jesus. That poor thing is gonna get humped to flinders.

Oh man, now I look crazy in the office for laughing so hard. Touche!

CPA, CFO, Sports Fan, Game when I have the time
Strazos
Greetings from the Slave Coast
Posts: 15542

The World's Worst Game: Curry or Covid


Reply #3 on: June 15, 2005, 09:26:43 AM

If I won it, I would simply burn it, just to piss off all the fanbois.

Fear the Backstab!
"Plato said the virtuous man is at all times ready for a grammar snake attack." - we are lesion
"Hell is other people." -Sartre
Paelos
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Reply #4 on: June 15, 2005, 09:29:32 AM

I'd post pics of me feeding it into a Shredder ala Fargo on the General Forums.

CPA, CFO, Sports Fan, Game when I have the time
Shockeye
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Skinny-dippin' in a sea of Lee, I'd propose on bended knee...


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Reply #5 on: June 15, 2005, 09:59:35 AM

I'd post pics of me feeding it into a Shredder ala Fargo on the General Forums.

I'd rent it out for a shitton of money and have it cleaned and disinfected between each rental.
Samwise
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sentient yeast infection


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Reply #6 on: June 15, 2005, 11:12:29 AM

I'd rent it out for a shitton of money and have it cleaned and disinfected between each rental.

I understand the renting, but why the disinfecting?  Don't you want to do your part to purify the genepool?
voodoolily
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Finnuh, munnuh, muhfuh, I enjoy creating new written vernacular, s'all.


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Reply #7 on: June 16, 2005, 05:07:00 PM

to think about hate-fucking while you rub one out.



Best battle screenshot wins this little vixen! Forgive me if this is (again) old news. I just saw it and thought you'd chuckle. OR run to the bathroom, as it were.

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The Legend of Zephyr - a different blog.
HaemishM
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the Confederate flag underneath the stone in my class ring


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Reply #8 on: June 17, 2005, 09:43:00 AM

Dear God, that makes me stabby. And not stabby with my penis kind of stabby.

Shockeye
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Skinny-dippin' in a sea of Lee, I'd propose on bended knee...


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Reply #9 on: June 17, 2005, 10:01:44 AM

The boobies are a bit small. Maybe they can enhance that for next contest.
Paelos
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Reply #10 on: June 17, 2005, 10:19:24 AM

Aren't the elves blue? I'm just saying.

CPA, CFO, Sports Fan, Game when I have the time
Strazos
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Posts: 15542

The World's Worst Game: Curry or Covid


Reply #11 on: June 19, 2005, 11:58:04 AM

Aren't the elves blue? I'm just saying.

Fucking Bluegers.

Fear the Backstab!
"Plato said the virtuous man is at all times ready for a grammar snake attack." - we are lesion
"Hell is other people." -Sartre
Arnold
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Reply #12 on: June 20, 2005, 01:30:30 AM

Aren't the elves blue? I'm just saying.

Wait a minute, WOW elves are blue???  That must be why the new UO elves are blue.

"WOW has, like, 2 million subscribers!  And they've got ELVES, you hear me???  BLUE ELVES!!!!  Get us some goddamn blue elves and we are BACK ON TOP!  MAKE IT SO!'
Bunk
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Operating Thetan One


Reply #13 on: June 20, 2005, 07:50:52 AM

Aren't the elves blue? I'm just saying.

Actually, the white balance is off in that picture. There are other shots of it online that show a slight purple hue - which is one of the selectable skin tones for Night Elves.

Hmm, upon further thought, its also possible that the other picture I saw was doctored with a purple tone, so who knows.

Why am I even talking about this?

"Welcome to the internet, pussy." - VDL
"I have retard strength." - Schild
Alkiera
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Reply #14 on: June 20, 2005, 02:41:28 PM

For some reason, I thought that picture was of Firiona Vie...  Tho I agree, the breasts are kinda small for her, too.

Alkiera

"[I could] become the world's preeminent MMO class action attorney.  I could be the lawyer EVEN AMBULANCE CHASERS LAUGH AT. " --Triforcer

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Nebu
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Reply #15 on: June 22, 2005, 01:15:57 PM

I see this thing and it keeps reminding me of this timeless classic.



Imagine the thrill of opening the crate when it arrives.  You're "valuable prize".
« Last Edit: June 22, 2005, 01:38:03 PM by Nebu »

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HaemishM
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Reply #16 on: June 22, 2005, 01:34:46 PM

Ahhhh, the joy of electirc sex in the window.

voodoolily
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Reply #17 on: June 22, 2005, 02:54:34 PM

It's French - it says "Fra-GEE-lay"

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The Legend of Zephyr - a different blog.
MaceVanHoffen
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Reply #18 on: June 22, 2005, 07:44:34 PM

The boobies are a bit small. Maybe they can enhance that for next contest.

Bigger boobies will be awarded as no drop loot in a GM-run, in-game event in which everyone dies.  The End.

Wait, sorry, wrong game ...
SuperPopTart
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Reply #19 on: June 22, 2005, 11:17:21 PM

From worldofwarcraft.com frontpage:

Quote
To celebrate the launch of the Battlegrounds System, Blizzard is giving away a rare, life-size mannequin of a Night Elf female.

I know there is a realdoll joke to be made here, but i just don't have the motivation to try.


They really are a tad late in this. Realdoll has been making these for an age now, but they do come with improved and motorized "hand and body motions", and I am sure much of the male gamer population that can afford this, has this already.

I wonder how many developers out there use one of these as... "inspiration.."....



I am Super, I am a Pop Tart.
WayAbvPar
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Reply #20 on: June 24, 2005, 10:00:37 AM

It's French - it says "Fra-GEE-lay"

Italian. N00b.


 evil evil evil evil evil evil

When speaking of the MMOG industry, the glass may be half full, but it's full of urine. HaemishM

Always wear clean underwear because you never know when a Tory Government is going to fuck you.- Ironwood

Libertarians make fun of everyone because they can't see beyond the event horizons of their own assholes Surlyboi
voodoolily
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Finnuh, munnuh, muhfuh, I enjoy creating new written vernacular, s'all.


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Reply #21 on: June 24, 2005, 11:09:09 AM

I haven't seen that movie since I was 10 years old so blow it out your ass, The Jesus.

Voodoo & Sauce - a blog.
The Legend of Zephyr - a different blog.
WayAbvPar
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Posts: 19270


Reply #22 on: June 24, 2005, 11:42:55 AM

How is that possible? It is on every Christmas for 24 hours straight! Your mission (and you WILL accept it) is to watch it at least twice this Christmas season. 

When speaking of the MMOG industry, the glass may be half full, but it's full of urine. HaemishM

Always wear clean underwear because you never know when a Tory Government is going to fuck you.- Ironwood

Libertarians make fun of everyone because they can't see beyond the event horizons of their own assholes Surlyboi
Strazos
Greetings from the Slave Coast
Posts: 15542

The World's Worst Game: Curry or Covid


Reply #23 on: June 24, 2005, 11:43:19 AM

I haven't seen that movie since I was 10 years old so blow it out your ass, The Jesus.

What. The. Fuck. is wrong with you?

The damn movie is on for 24 hours on Christmas Day, every year.

Heathen.

Fear the Backstab!
"Plato said the virtuous man is at all times ready for a grammar snake attack." - we are lesion
"Hell is other people." -Sartre
Mortriden
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Reply #24 on: June 24, 2005, 12:42:31 PM

I haven't seen that movie since I was 10 years old so blow it out your ass, The Jesus.

What. The. Fuck. is wrong with you?

The damn movie is on for 24 hours on Christmas Day, every year.

Heathen.

I think both TNT and TBS play it contuiously from Thanksgiving until New Years.

It's like calling shenanigans.  But you say "jihad" instead. - Llava
They are out there, but they are bi-products of funny families. If you know funny old people, see if they have daughters. -Paelos
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Bunk
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Operating Thetan One


Reply #25 on: June 24, 2005, 03:14:53 PM

I haven't seen that movie since I was 10 years old so blow it out your ass, The Jesus.

What. The. Fuck. is wrong with you?

The damn movie is on for 24 hours on Christmas Day, every year.

Heathen.

I think both TNT and TBS play it contuiously from Thanksgiving until New Years.

As it should be, damnit. Its about the only Christmas movie I can stand having on in the background all day. Far preferralble to watching A Chrismas Carol or Its a Wonderful life plod along for four hours each.

That movie is nearly as quotable as a Python flick or the Princess Bride.


"Welcome to the internet, pussy." - VDL
"I have retard strength." - Schild
Samwise
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Reply #26 on: June 24, 2005, 03:29:27 PM

The actual books (author is Jean Shepherd) are even better, IMO.  Most of the best lines from the movie are the ones that were lifted straight from the original stories.  Also, in the books, the Old Man is uncensored.   :-D
Murgos
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Reply #27 on: June 25, 2005, 07:00:57 AM

So this story made me curious and I went and checked out the realdoll website...

~$7000.00?!!?

HOLY SHIT!  Spent judiciously 7 large could get you a lot of sex with real women, several of them at once even.

"You have all recieved youre last warning. I am in the process of currently tracking all of youre ips and pinging your home adressess. you should not have commencemed a war with me" - Aaron Rayburn
Paelos
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Reply #28 on: June 25, 2005, 10:14:40 AM

So this story made me curious and I went and checked out the realdoll website...

~$7000.00?!!?

HOLY SHIT!  Spent judiciously 7 large could get you a lot of sex with real women, several of them at once even.

This ties in nicely with the philosophic hedonism thread.

CPA, CFO, Sports Fan, Game when I have the time
voodoolily
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Finnuh, munnuh, muhfuh, I enjoy creating new written vernacular, s'all.


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Reply #29 on: June 26, 2005, 11:37:54 AM

Realdolls don't give you The AIDS, and don't drug you then rob you. You can do fucked-up things to them that would land you in jail if you tried it on a human. Also, if you soak one in a hot tub for awhile, they get that body-temp goodness. (What. I have a friend who works at an adult toy store.) Seems worth 7K to me (if that's your thing) - imagine the savings compared to the cost of a good ho and bail?  And frankly, I'm surprised they haven't tapped the nerd-fetishist demographic a lot sooner.


I HATE HATE HATE Christmas movies (although that one is my least hated). Christmas programs make me very stabby. God, I twitch just thinking about it. I loathe the holidays in general because of the awful programming and even worse music, and tend to stick to cooking shows and VH-1 during that time of year (also, since all the games come out in November the tv isn't on very much anyway). The only good thing about the holidays is giving gifts and cooking yummies. But I can do that all year 'round! In your face, Jesus!

Voodoo & Sauce - a blog.
The Legend of Zephyr - a different blog.
Shockeye
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Reply #30 on: June 26, 2005, 12:42:39 PM

Two excellent Christmas movies:

Die Hard
The Ref
Llava
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Reply #31 on: June 26, 2005, 02:18:50 PM

Kevin Spacey's delivery is at its most perfect in The Ref.

"I'm actually quite happy.  There's nothing I'd change about my life."
"Oh stop it.  If you're so happy, then why am I miserable?  What do you call that?  What do you call a marriage where one person is miserable and you're perfectly happy?"
"Luck."

That the saints may enjoy their beatitude and the grace of God more abundantly they are permitted to see the punishment of the damned in hell. -Saint Thomas Aquinas, Summa Theologica
Merusk
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Reply #32 on: June 26, 2005, 06:22:33 PM

I haven't visited realdolls since I first passed it around to folks I knew in 99, but they used to have a testimonials section.  They described their clientelle as 'typically bitter, jaded men who had recently been through a severely unplesant divorce."   Some of the stories were just twisted in ways you can only expect very sad, sad, lonely  men to be. (i.e. having a 'dinner date' with your sex doll.)  If you feast on the tears of the pathetic, it's definatly a good read.

(Just checked, the testimonials part is still up (NSFW, naked doll) but those are different letters.  A lot of them mention Howard Stern, so the truly sad ones aren't there anymore.  Pity. )

And not all Christmas movies suck. In addition to the two already mentioned,  A Christmas Story is classic, as is National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation.


The past cannot be changed. The future is yet within your power.
Roac
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Reply #33 on: June 26, 2005, 10:42:24 PM

So this story made me curious and I went and checked out the realdoll website...

~$7000.00?!!?

HOLY SHIT!  Spent judiciously 7 large could get you a lot of sex with real women, several of them at once even.

Real women cost you more.

-Roac
King of Ravens

"Young people who pretend to be wise to the ways of the world are mostly just cynics. Cynicism masquerades as wisdom, but it is the farthest thing from it. Because cynics don't learn anything. Because cynicism is a self-imposed blindness, a rejection of the world because we are afraid it will hurt us or disappoint us." -SC
Murgos
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Reply #34 on: June 27, 2005, 05:12:24 AM

I didn't say marry them.

"You have all recieved youre last warning. I am in the process of currently tracking all of youre ips and pinging your home adressess. you should not have commencemed a war with me" - Aaron Rayburn
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