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Topic: What the hell is wrong with Ben Affleck? (Read 10771 times)
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Shockeye
Staff Emeritus
Posts: 6668
Skinny-dippin' in a sea of Lee, I'd propose on bended knee...
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AFFLECK'S LOADS OF FUNBEN Affleck can get a little nutty around his buddy Kevin Smith. The "Jersey Girl" director tells Maxim U.K. that during filming of the 2004 flop, Affleck used to pull a prank called a "Fruit Basket." Smith explains: "I'd be sitting in the director's chair and I'd be watching a playback, and he'd stand behind me. Every once in a while I'd feel something on my neck. I'd be like, 'What the [bleep] was that?' And I'd turn around and he'd have his [scrotum] out and resting on my neck. I was like, 'What the [bleep] is wrong with you, dude?' What if it got out in the press that that's the kind of thing you do?' He's like, 'No one would ever [bleeping] believe you, sir.' " Besides exposing Affleck's scrotal shenanigans, Smith tells the mag about his hate for Reese Witherspoon, who was once rude to Smith's ex-girl friend, Joey Lauren Adams. "I was at some party with Joey . . . and Reese had just got a part Joey was hoping to get," Smith recalled. "Joey said, 'Hey, Reese — I just wanted to say congratulations. I think you'll do really great with the part,' and Reese just gave her this dead-eyed look and was like, 'Whatever.' What a [bleeping] [bleep]-bag!"
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WayAbvPar
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Ha! I knew some guys who would do that to each other during tense Super Tecmo Bowl tournaments. Thankfully I heard the story secondhand.
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When speaking of the MMOG industry, the glass may be half full, but it's full of urine. HaemishM
Always wear clean underwear because you never know when a Tory Government is going to fuck you.- Ironwood
Libertarians make fun of everyone because they can't see beyond the event horizons of their own assholes Surlyboi
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Shockeye
Staff Emeritus
Posts: 6668
Skinny-dippin' in a sea of Lee, I'd propose on bended knee...
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What the fuck is wrong with people?
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Samwise
Moderator
Posts: 19324
sentient yeast infection
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I didn't get that one until a second reading. BRILLIANT.
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Miasma
Terracotta Army
Posts: 5283
Stopgap Measure
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I hate to ask this question but - how would he do that? Was he walking on stilts?
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Samwise
Moderator
Posts: 19324
sentient yeast infection
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Director's chairs sit pretty low. And Ben's a reasonably tall guy, IIRC. Doesn't seem tough to me.
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Hoax
Terracotta Army
Posts: 8110
l33t kiddie
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There was a kid in my high school who would ask you if you wanted some gum after preping his scrotum area for a quick flash. I guess he figured that his scrotum looked like gum... Of course he eventually evolved the gag to hanging one of his nuts out of his fly and asked if they wanted a gumball. *sigh* High School is so wrong
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A nation consists of its laws. A nation does not consist of its situation at a given time. If an individual's morals are situational, then that individual is without morals. If a nation's laws are situational, that nation has no laws, and soon isn't a nation. -William Gibson
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Bunk
Contributor
Posts: 5828
Operating Thetan One
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Nuts should never, ever be hung out of ones fly. You're just asking for frank 'n beens zipper incident.
Oh, and to stay on topic: Affleck was da bomb in Phantoms, yo!
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"Welcome to the internet, pussy." - VDL "I have retard strength." - Schild
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Bunk
Contributor
Posts: 5828
Operating Thetan One
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Actually, to stay more seriously on topic - I did actually like Jersey Girl. I work with a guy who is actually going through almost exactly what happens in the movie, so I guess I can relate.
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"Welcome to the internet, pussy." - VDL "I have retard strength." - Schild
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tazelbain
Terracotta Army
Posts: 6603
tazelbain
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I'm Ben Affleck, Bitch!
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"Me am play gods"
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AlteredOne
Terracotta Army
Posts: 357
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This mega rich guy at my college named James McFee III (name slightly changed) would walk up to the salad bar carrying his tray low, with his balls resting on the tray. Because of his father's phat loot, the girls thought he and his exposed nads were cute. For fun, he would spread rumors that various guys had crabs.
Some friends and I retaliated with an ad for a gerbilling contest with a picture of a gerbil wearing a mining helmet, with little pull-off tabs with James' name and number. It backfired when one of his ex-girlfriends found out we did it, and told him. Being such a swell guy, he threatened to take us to the deans and have us thrown out of school, on the grounds that Gay Pride week was coming up. I pointed out that gerbilling is an equal opportunity sport, hardly a gay thing. Fortunately when James realized one of his rich buddies was involved in the prank, he backed off.
So the moral of the story is, umm, rich guys can do whatever they like with their balls, and people like it.
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Trippy
Administrator
Posts: 23657
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This mega rich guy at my college named James McFee III (name slightly changed) would walk up to the salad bar carrying his tray low, with his balls resting on the tray. Because of his father's phat loot, the girls thought he and his exposed nads were cute.
There was a baseball player in my Freshman dorm that would do the same thing except he would only do it on our guys-only floor. Except of course that the girls below us would come up on a regular basis and they complained to the RAs so that stopped, thankfully.
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schild
Administrator
Posts: 60350
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What the hell is wrong with him?
I don't know. But he fucked Alias for another season. The bastige.
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Furiously
Terracotta Army
Posts: 7199
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Ha! I knew some guys who would do that to each other during tense Super Tecmo Bowl tournaments. Thankfully I heard the story secondhand.
Man those guys sound like sickos....
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Signe
Terracotta Army
Posts: 18942
Muse.
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I guess they're bonding. I think it's kind of sweet.
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My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
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ahoythematey
Terracotta Army
Posts: 1729
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You thought that picture of frodo and samwise was sweet. You scare me, signe.
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Signe
Terracotta Army
Posts: 18942
Muse.
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That pic of Frodo and Sam IS very sweet! Here's another for you:
[EDITED FOR THE CHILDREN]
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« Last Edit: June 11, 2005, 11:32:13 AM by Shockeye »
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My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
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|3o3dha
Terracotta Army
Posts: 33
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That pic of Frodo and Sam IS very sweet! Here's another for you:
[img]http://hometown.aol.com/gayhobbitsesrock/images/frodosam7.jpg[img]
You sick, sick mind. That picture freaks me out.
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Signe
Terracotta Army
Posts: 18942
Muse.
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HEY!!! You censored me! 
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My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
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Shockeye
Staff Emeritus
Posts: 6668
Skinny-dippin' in a sea of Lee, I'd propose on bended knee...
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HEY!!! You censored me!  Only because I care about the children.
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schild
Administrator
Posts: 60350
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Goddamn. The whole hobbit gay softcore photo thing is stupid.
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Signe
Terracotta Army
Posts: 18942
Muse.
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Goddamn. The whole hobbit gay softcore photo thing is stupid.
Fine. I'll go grab some gay hobbit hardcore photos for you. You should have told me earlier....
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My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
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WayAbvPar
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Goddamn. The whole hobbit gay softcore photo thing is stupid.
Fine. I'll go grab some gay hobbit hardcore photos for you. You should have told me earlier.... That is the scariest threat I have ever heard. Plsnokthx.
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When speaking of the MMOG industry, the glass may be half full, but it's full of urine. HaemishM
Always wear clean underwear because you never know when a Tory Government is going to fuck you.- Ironwood
Libertarians make fun of everyone because they can't see beyond the event horizons of their own assholes Surlyboi
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Strazos
Greetings from the Slave Coast
Posts: 15542
The World's Worst Game: Curry or Covid
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Heh, Signe got WTFPWNED by Shockeye. That amuses me.
Also, speaking of Shockeye, I do believe he won the "Cat Week" avatar contest. I smirk every time I look at the damn thing, hehe.
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Fear the Backstab! "Plato said the virtuous man is at all times ready for a grammar snake attack." - we are lesion "Hell is other people." -Sartre
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Trippy
Administrator
Posts: 23657
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Also, speaking of Shockeye, I do believe he won the "Cat Week" avatar contest. I smirk every time I look at the damn thing, hehe.
I vote for voodoolily and her Scottish Fold kitty.
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Shockeye
Staff Emeritus
Posts: 6668
Skinny-dippin' in a sea of Lee, I'd propose on bended knee...
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Cat "week". Bah.
I don't think so.
This is cat MONTH.
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Signe
Terracotta Army
Posts: 18942
Muse.
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Heh, Signe got WTFPWNED by Shockeye. That amuses me.
Also, speaking of Shockeye, I do believe he won the "Cat Week" avatar contest. I smirk every time I look at the damn thing, hehe.
I have always suspected and now you have confirmed it. Strazos wants Shockeye. Not that there is anything wrong with it.
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My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
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Samwise
Moderator
Posts: 19324
sentient yeast infection
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Who doesn't want Shockeye, I'd like to know?
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Signe
Terracotta Army
Posts: 18942
Muse.
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Who doesn't want Shockeye, I'd like to know?
Excellent point.
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My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
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Shockeye
Staff Emeritus
Posts: 6668
Skinny-dippin' in a sea of Lee, I'd propose on bended knee...
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You people only want me for my Bitchin' Camero.
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voodoolily
Contributor
Posts: 5348
Finnuh, munnuh, muhfuh, I enjoy creating new written vernacular, s'all.
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I got a Bitchin'Camaro! Bitchin Camaor! Bitchin Camaro! dang but I love the Dead Milkmen.
If I had a pair of balls, you bet yer sweet sassy molassy I'd put 'em on people's necks. In a heartbeat! One uvmy good buddies in high school used to do the tossed salad bit, and it was gross , but if I had nuts I'd put 'em everywhere. You guys should count yer blessings. RTeally.
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Shockeye
Staff Emeritus
Posts: 6668
Skinny-dippin' in a sea of Lee, I'd propose on bended knee...
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One uvmy good buddies in high school used to do the tossed salad bit, and it was gross See, you aren't GGG.
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Samprimary
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I'm surprised to find that the Hang Brain phenomenon has survived past the 80's.
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Signe
Terracotta Army
Posts: 18942
Muse.
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And another thread turns into confusing wibble. I must live on a different planet... I have no idea what anyone is talking about anymore.
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My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
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Pococurante
Terracotta Army
Posts: 2060
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Testicular ventiliation. One of the few great pleasures of being a guy.
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