Jury Duty Problem

[shiznitz]

I'm going to go with, "You're hosed and they'll put a warrant out for you so don't get a speeding ticket." However I've never been called so I have no experience here.

I'm willing to bet you'll get double burned and be put on a long trial now instead of some low-level case.

Whether or not one is selected for an actual jury is not in the hands of those determining who is in the jury pool.

[K9]

trying to determine if I should go full-Nerf or not.

What happens if you turn up and just try and make yourself out to be the most unsuitable juror ever?

I mean, turn up dressed as a Klan member, talking about how you're your own personal Jesus. Claim that the voices in your head prevent you from passing judgement on other humans, that sort of thing? Tell the judge that you think he's a lizard person maybe?

I mean, can they find you in contempt of court for stuff like that? Surely it's easier for them to excuse you rather than have someone there who really doesn't want to be there?

[Teleku]

On the first day, when they are doing selections, just tell them your wife is a laywer and that will be the end of that.

[Paelos]

On the first day, when they are doing selections, just tell them your wife is a laywer and that will be the end of that.

Yep, winner.

[HaemishM]

Amen to that.

I've served on 3 juries in my time and it's always interesting. Yes, it's a hassle and a half for work, but you get some good stories out of it and generally meet some interesting people you'll never ever see again.

But again, tell them your wife is a lawyer, and it's very likely no lawyer will touch you for a jury.

[Abagadro]

Nope. I used to think that until I was selected to serve on a jury a couple of years ago.

[Zar]

Yeah, I was selected to serve on a jury as a law student.  Thought for sure I'd be dismissed, but nope.  I've heard enough other stories of lawyers being selected as jurors to think that it's not the automatic disqualification it perhaps once was.

Turns out that the case I served on was super interesting, and serving as a juror was an educational and eye-opening experience, so I'm glad it worked out like it did.

[Ironwood]

Nope. I used to think that until I was selected to serve on a jury a couple of years ago.

I seem to remember you telling us that before.

We've done this.  Or am I in the matrix ?

[Trippy]

My jury panel had a doctor on it, though he was excused part way through.

[jgsugden]

While having a wife as a lawyer reduces the chances you'll be seated as a juror, it does not negate it. 

And as for trying to get out of jury duty by being a jerk - you're rolling the dice.  Sometimes the judge will toss you out to avoid a fuss, but they sometimes go after you hard for it.  I've been called in to sit for jury duty a half dozen times and seen this attempted almost every time by at least one person - the judge called BS on the person trying it and gave them contempt warnings each time.

Besides - Civic Duty.  If your fate were in the hands of a jury, wouldn't you want intelligent people on it?

[Paelos]

Nope. I used to think that until I was selected to serve on a jury a couple of years ago.

I seem to remember you telling us that before.

We've done this.  Or am I in the matrix ?

We're getting older, which means we tell the same stories over and over, forgetting we told them last week.

[Abagadro]

Nope. I used to think that until I was selected to serve on a jury a couple of years ago.

I seem to remember you telling us that before.

We've done this.  Or am I in the matrix ?

I probably mentioned at the time.

[Rasix]

Jury duty threads pop up fairly regularly.  Enough that I realized what I was about to say and didn't bother typing it out this time.

[shiznitz]

I would not recommend lying about something that is easily confirmable like your spouse's profession.  What will work, if you are being interviewed for a criminal jury, is tell a story about your childhood when you were on the wrong side of a similar crime.  The only time I ever made it close to a jury I was excused because I said a neighbor had been murdered by a crack addict when I was a kid.  The defendant was on trial for a drug related crime. A neighbor of mine was murdered, but it was by her insane gardener.   The defendant's lawyer excused me in the first round.

[Tebonas]

I've never been to Jury duty, I don't even know if we have such a thing, but I've been to two graduations, one of them my own, and they were both boring as fuck and a waste of my time.

[Paelos]

I've never been to Jury duty, I don't even know if we have such a thing, but I've been to two graduations, one of them my own, and they were both boring as fuck and a waste of my time.

Man is that ever true. There's no graduation that I've been to where I remember anything anybody said.

[WayAbvPar]

Jury duty is pretty harmless, especially in the era of smartphones and e-readers.

[Ironwood]

Jury duty is pretty harmless, especially in the era of smartphones and e-readers.

Not sure if serious.

[Trippy]

Presumably he means the waiting around part.

[WayAbvPar]

Yes- I mean fighting off the tedium of sitting in a room waiting for something to happen. If your employer pays you to go, then it is actually a nice little break from work 

Getting assigned to a long trial would be a drag though.

[Hawkbit]

Not getting paid from work. However, I will make $10.00 per day for serving! :)

I definitely would not have gone to my graduation if not for my daughter. Both she and my wife had to put up with me being somewhat absent for the past three years. I know she'll find it boring as hell, but we want to show her the end result of working towards a goal. It's as much for her and my wife as it is for me. I'm also the first person to graduate with a four-year degree on my side of the family. So there's a bit of excitement around it.

I should get an A in this final capstone class, which puts me graduating with honors, too. Worked my damn ass off. I think I'm going to live on bourbon for a few weeks after I'm finished though.

[Margalis]

Can't really blame them for saying no when you used pretty weak excuses twice already.

I just had Jury Duty yesterday at the Compton Courthouse. I just sat in the assembly room the entire time, was never called. The food at the Compton Courthouse is fucking disgusting by the way. I saw it had 1 star on Yelp and was like "what the hell does a star rating for a courthouse even mean?" Then I ate lunch.

At least now I can say that I'm straight out of Compton.

[Samwise]

Can't really blame them for saying no when you used pretty weak excuses twice already.

Yeah, I don't really understand how "it conflicts with my lectures" is an excuse for putting it off for a full two years.  You don't get vacations?

The one time I actively ducked out of jury duty it was because the case was expected to go on for the entire summer, and I depended on the income from my summer job to be able to pay tuition for the next two semesters, so I told the judge that serving on this particular jury would basically fuck up my entire life and he agreed to let me out of it.  Since then I haven't ever actually been called in, although I've got a summons for this next week so maybe my streak will finally get broken.

[kaid]

I've never been to Jury duty, I don't even know if we have such a thing, but I've been to two graduations, one of them my own, and they were both boring as fuck and a waste of my time.

I think in all my life I was called twice but the cases settled before jury selection so I did not wind up having to go either time.

[Hawkbit]

You don't get vacations?

Yep, six weeks a year from school on this program. One week in spring, one at Christmas and four in August. However, I was only on break from school during those periods and still had to work. I typically took a week vacation from work during the summer so our family could do a vacation, but otherwise I worked through my school breaks.

I definitely own the fact that I deferred, no question about it. In hindsight, I should have skipped work and lecture last year and just went. I can't fix the past though, only hope the judge lets me postpone until I'm back in Washington. Otherwise, I have a choice to make.

[Merusk]

I'm going to go with, "You're hosed and they'll put a warrant out for you so don't get a speeding ticket." However I've never been called so I have no experience here.

I'm willing to bet you'll get double burned and be put on a long trial now instead of some low-level case.

Whether or not one is selected for an actual jury is not in the hands of those determining who is in the jury pool.

   I answered this already. It was a karma comment, not a bureaucrat one.  Petty revenge fantasies should be the 2nd thought at this stage of our lives, kids. Reality fucks us enough that nobody needs to help it.

Anywho, I put dodging jury duty in the same bin as not voting and bitching about taxes being too high because teachers get 2 months off a year.  Just go.

[Khaldun]

I also used to think that lawyers would always knock a Ph.d off a jury, etc.

Turns out, nope! They'll take what they can get. So I've been seated twice in recent years, both times for what were basically ambulance-chasing civil suits intended as far as I can tell as practice for wet-behind-the-ears newb lawyers hired by their sleazy firms (in both cases the judges were palpably, unmistakeably annoyed to have to even be having a trial).

[NowhereMan]

I'd just like to helpfully chime in that for non-extradition countries Teleku would probably appreciate the company in Russia and Vietnam is very liveable now. There's even a good selection of employment and international schools along with awesome food so fun for the whole family.

The Maldives seem nice but I'm not sure about the possible employment situation, they're pretty much totally tourism and hospitality and I think there's a strong bias towards locals and strong swimmers.

So really I don't now what the fuss is about the jury thing, look on it as a fun and fresh opportunity to travel and explore new regions of the world! Also I've never even gotten a jury summons in the UK while I lived there. I'm not sure if the US has higher proportions of them or something.

[Selby]

What happens if you turn up and just try and make yourself out to be the most unsuitable juror ever?

As has been stated, depends on the judge.  Some judges will kick you out just to get you out of the way (which means you get to go home at 9AM) and others will force you to stay all day and threaten you with contempt - or actually charge you with it and get you taken away as happened once I saw in San Diego.  Guy REALLY didn't want jury duty apparently and thought he was smarter than the rest.

That said, I've always gotten out of it by stating "I have bills to pay that my employer won't cover and serving on this long trial will jeopardize my chances of meeting court ordered obligations and thus I might have to go to jail."  Haven't been polled for jury duty in several years now though.  California was doing the "call ahead for a week to find out if you show up" thing, so all I had to do was call in every few hours to find out if I had to show up and out of the 5 times I did, only once did I get summoned and then they ended up settling that afternoon so once again off the hook.

[angry.bob]

When I asked for a deferral, the guy denied me. So I asked him what happens if I don't show, his one-liner was "I can’t give you any legal advice."

I'm not a legal expert but I am an expert in passive-aggressive dickery and screwing people who I feel offended me, and this guy is looking to put the screws to you. Or at least he was at that particular time. He will probably be keeping an eye on what you do like a hawk to teach you a lesson using whatever means he has. He's probably used his bullshit detector to decide that in those two years you had two perfectly valid summer breaks to do your duty and you didn't.

Here in Akron I just got out of local jury duty by telling them I didn't have a reliable sitter and that I might have to bring my 4 year old on some days. You could try that, but that plan has the drawback that you may need to prove you have a 4 year old. I didn't have to and the speed they waived me at I doubt they could have checked unless that info was on whatever roll they use. I'd recommend going up the chain of bureaucracy before you try lying.

I really liked my Federal Grand Jury duty, it was awesome. I learned so much about the worlds of Meth and child porn that I never could have otherwise.

[Strazos]

I think I've been sent a summons...once?

It was after I had already moved out to DC for my job, so it was pretty simple to explain that my NJ address is just my legal domicile and I don't ordinarily reside there (it's my parents' house) - I don't believe I've been summoned since...assuming my parents are opening any official-looking mail addressed to me.

fakeedit: Also, with the number of times I've gone in and out of the country (and would have been stopped if there was a warrant), and my record being constantly monitored for my security clearance, I can only assume NJ hasn't particularly minded my non-availability.

[Yegolev]

Another wierd thing? I was never called once in Ohio, yet both my wife and I were called within six months of moving to Seattle.

I believe Georgia uses a last-in, first-out rule since the same happened to me right after I moved here but I haven't been called since.

[Spiff]

So really I don't now what the fuss is about the jury thing, look on it as a fun and fresh opportunity to travel and explore new regions of the world! Also I've never even gotten a jury summons in the UK while I lived there. I'm not sure if the US has higher proportions of them or something.

I'm not sure about the UK, but the whole 'jury of peers' thing certainly isn't as common in a lot of Europe. Many countries have all but eliminated the system.
Belgium, where I'm at being an exception. They still love it for some reason (can't say I'm a fan myself).

[jgsugden]

For those that are curious, there are a lot of articles online about jury selection.  Some of them address why attorneys, doctors, and other 'smart' people are, or are not, excused.

For those that want a more realistic explanation as to why jury selection seems to be so random at times: There are a lot of really bad attorneys out there - horrible ones. 

[Hawkbit]

Written request denied. Looks like I'm going to become part of the court system, but on the other side! :)

As in all things government, the guy who denied my initial request told me to snail mail the judge. However, the written request was signed by the guy who denied me, not the judge. Cockgoblins, all the way down.