NFL 2013

[sickrubik]

that needs some benny hill music.

[K9]

Gio's the man

[sickrubik]

Justin Blackmon suspended indefinitely. As someone on the internet said.

"In Justin Blackmon's defense, he plays for the Jaguars."

[HaemishM]

It's not like he's going to make a lick of difference this year anyway. Shit, if I played for the Jags, I'd be on the drugs too.

[Ghambit]

In the middle of a conversation that lasted 19 texts, Martin wrote the following to Incognito: "Yeah, I'm good man. It's insane bro, but just know I don't blame you guys at all. It's just the culture around football, and the locker room got to me a little." -J.Mart

I know I'm being a bit obsessive about this story but it just really resonates with me because I too was a scholar football player; not anywhere near the level of this guy (could never gain enough weight), but still.  In my situation, I had the benefit of being around most of my friends, who were also fairly smart.  I'd say half of my team were gifted/honors (the geekpack was strong, we had all planned to play ball together since kindergarten).  Martin's case was similar from K-postsecondary (culminating in being a Stanford grad.), he was always around ball players who could likely prove Riemann between possessions.  Linemen are always the smartest on a team btw; the amount of meta that goes on in the trenches is never publicized though, sadly.  

Anyways, Martin gets to the NFL (where players tend to get dumb and dumberer; moreso in South Florida - the 2nd dumbest state in the union) and WHAM, reality check.  Then he's had to anchor the left side of the line with Incognito; the league's version of "Ogre" from RotN.  Never-you-mind the center (Pouncey) is also Aaron Rodriguez' best friend.  The icing?  A shitty coaching staff that takes advantage of his intellect by moving him around the line 3 times in one half-season (because they're too inept to sign proper position players) and making him bulk up as much as possible.

It makes me sad.  And reminds me somewhat of Ricky Williams and even a bit of Richard Sherman (out in Seattle).  These guys rarely fit in, their minds suffer being around that environment too long, and the media labels them "emotional" or "socially challenged."

It may seem 'wussy,' but seriously.  Think of it a second... one minute you're drinking chai lattes in Menlo Park after a good semi-conductor doping lab, the next you're herp-derping it in Myjammy with Ogre and PitBull.  Shit... I couldn't do it - I don't care how much they pay me.  

This shit is why I kept my little brother from playing ball, and he's the biggest kid in his school.  Not because of risk of head injury, but because of the inherent intellectual reversal that happens from being around the game a long time.  Eventually you wake up one day and you're like "damn, I'm way dumber then when I started."   You're also 80% likely to go bankrupt and your body will be broken.

[sickrubik]

John Fox is set to miss 4-6 weeks to have heart surgery. Blergh.

[01101010]

Well... I am now convinced the JETS are completely unpredictable.

[MrHat]

Last man standing.

[Nevermore]

It's like the football gods are telling Cleveland "No, you drafted Weeden so you're going to damn well play him!"

In other news, how about those Bucs! 

[Rasix]

Nick Foles.   

[Tannhauser]

[Mithas]

My wife has Peyton Manning in her fantasy league. She had no backup because Cutler got hurt. She decided it came down to Locker or Foles. She picked Locker. 

[HaemishM]

I picked Locker too.  Luckily, I only have to play him when Romo is on a bye.

[MrHat]

I picked Locker too.  Luckily, I only have to play him when Romo is on a bye.

Foles has outscored 4 teams in the FF league so far.

The hell Foles.

Is he good? His bad game was when he got concussed right?

[Paelos]

J-E-T-S JETS JETS JETS! 

[Mithas]

Foles isn't terrible, but he also isn't 7 TDs and perfect passer rating good. I do not understand this season.

[Ghambit]

To make things weirder... Richie Incognito has just now been suspended indefinitely for alleged player misconduct towards Jonathan Martin and JMart has filed formal allegations (and will likely now work to get a paycheck w/o playing).  There are also now whispers of racial undertones and that JMart may have been the rumoured gay player on the team.

Philbin should be fired.  Ineffective coach.  Cowher slammed him yesterday morning too.  What a joke of a franchise.   

[Rasix]

I picked Locker too.  Luckily, I only have to play him when Romo is on a bye.

Foles has outscored 4 teams in the FF league so far.

The hell Foles.

Is he good? His bad game was when he got concussed right?

Well, yes.  He's good.  His production fell off toward the end of his tenure at Arizona, but he went from having Gronk to having no Gronk.  The play calling at times during his college career was just fucking strange.  Sonny Dykes alternates between super-mega-genius and drooling imbecile.

His redzone efficiency was garbage (again, play calling) and he would at times airmail an easy one or toss a ball straight to the opposing team. But when in rhythm, he was really quite good.  He did pretty well given everything (small receivers, Stoops, more Stoops).

He's kind of like Chad Pennington, but taller and with a better arm.

[Bungee]

The Browns beat the Ravens and the Steelers give up the most points since ever.  At least the Bucs managed to keep true to themselves.

[K9]

Mike Glennon looked decent I thought.

[WayAbvPar]

Mike Glennon looked decent I thought.

That was more the Seahawks fucking sleepwalking through the first half again. Shit is getting old.

[sickrubik]

Icognito suspended from team indefinitely, plus turns out to be a SWELL GUY.

Adam Schefter of ESPN reports that in April of 2013, Incognito left a voicemail for Martin saying, “Hey, wassup, you half n—– piece of [expletive] . . . I saw you on Twitter, you been training ten weeks. [I want to] [expletive] in your [expletive] mouth. [I'm going to] slap your [expletive] mouth. [I'm going to] slap your real mother across the face (laughter). [Expletive] you, you’re still a rookie. I’ll kill you.”

[Mithas]

I guess Tony Dungy had Incognito on a list they called DNDC which stands for Do Not Draft Character. Meaning he had character issues that they weren't willing to deal with.

[Rasix]

He also perennially makes the "NFL's Dirtiest Players" list.   Yup, super guy.

[sickrubik]

Irony.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NjU5DsDl6TI

Edit: Also, apparently the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

[ghost]

Sounds like a rodeo of crazy.  They should fire everyone involved.

[Sjofn]

He's kind of like Chad Pennington, but taller and with a better arm.

I hope not as seemingly-injury-prone, either. I don't know if that's just my faulty memory, but I seem to recall ol' Chad breaking in half a lot.

[Rasix]

He's less athletic than Phil Simms.  If he doesn't have a great line or a scheme to get rid of the ball with haste, he's going to end up with a lot of time on the sideline.

He had a minor knee issue one year, but other than that, nothing.  At least he didn't end up like Willie Tuitama.  That guy is at risk for concussion when he eats cereal. 

[Ingmar]

Look, Pennington just had a dream of setting the record for "NFL Comeback Player of the Year" awards.

[HaemishM]

Pennington's shoulder was apparently made of tissue paper, and the socket was porcelain. Man's shoulder separated more times than Elizabeth Taylor's marriages.

As for Foles, against shitty defenses (Tampa and Oakland), he and that Eagles' offense appears godly. Against a competent defense (the Cowboys), he got a concussion and the offense sucked a line of goats.

[sickrubik]

On what basis would you judge Cowboys being a better defense than those other two? The stats are fairly similar, and I would probably personally take Oakland or Tampa over Dallas (aside from fantasy). Both Oakland and Tampa have less Points Against currently.

[HaemishM]

On what basis would you judge Cowboys being a better defense than those other two? The stats are fairly similar, and I would probably personally take Oakland or Tampa over Dallas (aside from fantasy). Both Oakland and Tampa have less Points Against currently.

5-4 vs. 0-7. 

The Cowboys have a decent front 7 and a backfield that occasionally shows up. Tampa has a dysfunctional locker room a staph infections. The Raiders are... the Raiders.

[Ingmar]

Raiders were a top 10 defense before yesterday, though.

[Nevermore]

Foles isn't terrible, but he also isn't 7 TDs and perfect passer rating good. I do not understand this season.

One has to wonder if that was Foles' 'Matt Flynn' game.

I was really hoping the Bucs would blow that lead they had and lose so Schiano would be fired today, but alas only one of those things happened. 

[Paelos]

Raiders were a top 10 defense before yesterday, though.

And then...they weren't.