Festivus 2010: The No Girls Allowed Edition

[schild]

Seriously, women.

[schild]

This if for Airing your Grievances if you were confused.

[Paelos]

Fuck Haemish for making the FF finals with Drew Brees and a bunch of grabasses.

That same lineup got me 13th last year!

[HaemishM]

Fuck Aaron Rodgers for not learning how to slide.

Fuck Mike McCarthy for not learning how to call a running play until your star QB is already concussed for the second time.

Fuck my clients for working me like a rented mule the last 8 months of the year.

Fuck publishers for not recognizing talent when they see it.

Fuck that crazy Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award critic who shitcanned my entry because she thought I cursed too fucking much, the fucking cunt.

Fuck the banks, mortgage brokers, everyone with a job on Wall Street and the entire Obama economic team. Double fuck Tim Geitner.

Fuck Tom Hicks and George Gillette for leaving such a goddamn mess Merseyside.

Fuck Fox for moving Fringe to the Friday night death slot.

Fuck Roland Moore just on GP.

Fuck idiotic TV viewers for not watching Terriers.

Fuck HBO for not bringing us a 4th season of Deadwood.

Fuck the flu. Seriously, the get the fuck out of my body already.

And fuck you all every one for being whoever the fuck you want to be.

[WindupAtheist]

Man I'm not feeling it this year for some reason. I'm at peace with the world, and not even particularly annoyed with any of you chucklefucks lately.

[Tannhauser]

I'm very disappointed

-for my house constantly costing me lots of money this year with a new heat pump, etc.
-for my inattention to voicemail which might have cost me a sweet new job.
-that I didn't travel hardly any this year
-that Blizzard decided that the Forsaken are now evil and making Alliance scumfucks even more smug.
-that Civ5 came out in such rough condition.  Seriously, it's Civ.

and finally the assholes who broke in my home and stole my TV, laptop and XBox in broad daylight while I was at work. 

[Salamok]

Fuck Dan Carpenter for missing 4 FG's and costing my 10-3 fantasy team its superbowl spot!
Fuck fantasy rules that hand out negative points for failed 60+ yard FG attempts, seriously fuck em right in the ear till their noses bleed.

[Lantyssa]

Fuck Schild for banning girls.

Fuck department heads for firing people to get back at different people.

[Samwise]

I'm disappointed in schild for taking my primary grievance of the season and putting it in the OP so I'll just look like I'm jumping on the bandwagon if I echo it.  But, yeah, women.  Fuck.  (Present company excepted.)

Is it just me or is Politics a hell of a lot more circular lately?  You assholes know who you are.  Go back to being entertaining and informative and stuff.

I'm disappointed in Valve for becoming perceptibly more evil.  There, I said it.

Fuck all the food and drink that I am trying and failing to avoid during the holidays.  Gah.

[Sjofn]

Fuck no girls allowed bullshit!

Fuck menstrual cramps for good measure!

Fuck fantasy rules that hand out negative points for failed 60+ yard FG attempts, seriously fuck em right in the ear till their noses bleed.

And fuck that too, even though that didn't happen to me! That sounds terrible!

[Ingmar]

Fuck the 8 pounds I've gained back over the last month and a half, undoing 4+ months of work.

Fuck the consultants who told me "yes we can set this server up for you this way" and now can't.

Fuck Harry Reid and his clinging to the old Senate rules.

Fuck Apple for trying to trick me into installing Safari every time iTunes patches.

Fuck Mike Singletary for like 10000000 different reasons.

Fuck Blizzard for not fixing Tol Barad yet.

Fuck Stardock for Elemental. Times ten.

Fuck the BCS for existing.

And as always, fuck Stanford.

[WindupAtheist]

Oh, fuck Floyd Mayweather and Manny Pacquiao for not fighting each other yet. That shit should be the most significant fight to come along in decades, with the winner guaranteed to be mentioned alongside the likes of Muhammad Ali and Sugar Ray Robinson for as long as anyone ever remembers they existed. Instead it's all political backbiting and jerking off. Mostly I blame Mayweather, he just doesn't seem to want any part of the fight.

Not really the forum for this sort of gripe, but whatever. I don't care about any of your shit either.

[Soln]

Fuck Politics.  Where people with good intentions go to Die.  Seriously folks.  A lot of fanaticism here and too much growing in the world.

[Chimpy]

Fuck the fucking fuckers. All of them.

[01101010]

Fuck unemployment and the perpetual job hunting.

[dusematic]

Fuck Morat for emoting "snort" in 22% of his posts.  What a pompous shitstain.

[rattran]

Fuck all the people who only post in Politics. 6000 posts by one person in Politics. Some of you have a problem.

[lamaros]

Fuck my old housemate for never returning my deposit, even though I moved out very kindly and generously in the face of her being a massive bitch so that her sister could move in. I hope she crashes her fat ass off her fixie in to traffic.

[Bunk]

Fine then

Fuck Kyle Orton and Frank Gore for costing me my first chance to make money in a football pool.

Fuck the economy and high cost of living life for putting me in a spot where I'm going to have to sell my condo and rent.

Fuck politicians for giving me such a negative view on humanity.

Fuck organized religion and Fox News for the same thing.

Fuck everyone who ever was involved in anyway in coming up with the attitude that Torture Porn is wholesome entertainment while Boobies are bad. Fuck them.
 - no fuck that. They don't get to be fucked. They can get tortured and get off on that instead.

Fuck George Lucas for being George Lucas, even though he hasn't raped my childhood recently, I feel it important that we never forget.

Fuck fucking ribbon stickers on the back of SUVs. Don't care what the fuck it's supporting, I'm sick of them.

Fuck the girl scouts for not bringing me chocolate mint cookies this year.

[apocrypha]

Fuck the girl scouts

I think you'll get in trouble for that.



Fuck our central heating installer for doing such a shoddy job, especially with the condensate outlet.

Fuck the UK weather for the resulting freezing-off-of-my-nuts for so long.

Fuck capitalism for any and all other problems in the world! 

[Zaljerem]

There, there ... let it all out.

No real anger here at the ladies ... just a bit of pity for a lot of 'em ... what with their daddy issues, inability to know a real man when they see one, their schizo "I want equality, but I want to be taken care of" mentality ...

As far as a laundry list of "fuck x" ... well, I could go there, but I'd rather think about the positives. My mom's brain cancer is pretty much in remission, I have two weeks off work, my daughter is home for awhile, and tomorrow is our yearly family and friends "Christmas Eve" bash.

I'll save the bah-humbug for when I realize 2011 is just as shitty as 2010 was.

[Typhon]

Fuck the news media for it's throttling up to the red line in it's effort to beat the viewer to the lowest common denominator in 2010 - boffo job there guys.  FUCKING ASSHOLES.  Fuck the news media for taking the gift of freedom of expression and turning it into a sleazy pandering to emotion, any emotion, regardless of the cost to objectivity and clarity in reporting.  Especially fuck the members of the news media that sleep like babies, without an ounce of regret or guilt about their disgusting abuse of power.

Fuck viewers for slurping it up - if you're only watching shows that preach foment to your sensibilities you're doing it wrong.

Fuck advertisers for not even attempting to be entertaining.  Yes, I understand that advertising gives us many nice things that we wouldn't otherwise be able to afford, but why do you have to suck so badly at your jobs?  Turning the sound up during commercials?  Really?  That's your best weapon to overcome our ambivalence about your advertisement?  Fuck-nuts!

Fuck bankers for being way more evil than politicians or lawyers while (until recently) maintaining an of respectability.

Fuck me for having the good fortune of having a job but not being grateful enough to overcome my ambivalence over doing the same fucking job on yet another artificially tight time-line at the end of the year.  What the fuck is my problem?

WHERE THE FUCK ARE THE FLYING CARS?!

Fuck 2010 straight in it's miserly, inconsistent, "things are getting better, oh no wait, they're getting worse" ass.  Good riddance, you fucking jack off.

[Surlyboi]

Fuck the New York Jets for dropping two games in a row in spectacular and not so spectacular fashions, respectively.

Fuck wedding plans

Fuck the powers that be at for getting all sorts of shit wrong that they won't realize they got wrong 'til six months from now when I've got to deal with the cleanup.

Fuck Morgan Stanley. No, I'm not coming back, no matter how much money you fuckers offer me.

Fuck all of Wall street for hiring shifty fuckers like me in the first place.

Fuck everyone on the right that thinks I'm a socialist and fuck everyone on the left that thinks I cut Obama to goddamn much slack.

Fuck the Bush tax cuts being extended and fucking over more of the poor and middle class.

Fuck every asshat that gave TRON: Legacy a poor review but thought Avatar was the height of fucking storytelling.

Fuck Bioware (Austin) in advance for fucking up SWTOR.

Fuck me for getting fat and lazy in my old age.

Fuck Fox in all its flavors, whether it be for their shitty, lopsided "news" or for, what Haemish said, sentencing Fringe to death while moving that musical clusterfuck American Idol to weds/thurs. Seriously, you shitstains don't have to devote another hour to the goddamn results.

[01101010]

No.2 fuck the TSA

[SnakeCharmer]

My only real FUCK YOU goes to:



If anyone else wants to masturbate everybody else in the circle jerk known as the Politics forums while regurgitating crap they read on huffpo or moveon.org, far from me to or anyone else to tell them differently.  TOLERANCE, BABY!

[Paelos]

Fuck holiday shoppers getting in my way on the drive home. It's too late now. Go explain to your kids and wife how you don't really like them enough to plan ahead, you jackweed.

[Lantyssa]

Fuck Zaljerem for not getting the format of this thread.

Fuck brain cancer.  (Glad his mom is getting better.)

Fuck any cancer.  (Really glad my dad got better.)

[Chimpy]

Fuck Blizzard being cheap fuckers and crowdsourcing their content delivery instead of just paying Akamai or the like to give everyone nice, fast, direct download connections. I just want to play the SCII demo, damnit.

[Ceryse]

Fuck mental health professionals in Alberta.
Fuck how mental health is regarded in general.

Also, fuck NHL refs.

Yeah, that's all I got.

[Bunk]

There, there ... let it all out.

No real anger here at the ladies ... just a bit of pity for a lot of 'em ... what with their daddy issues, inability to know a real man when they see one, their schizo "I want equality, but I want to be taken care of" mentality ...

As far as a laundry list of "fuck x" ... well, I could go there, but I'd rather think about the positives. My mom's brain cancer is pretty much in remission, I have two weeks off work, my daughter is home for awhile, and tomorrow is our yearly family and friends "Christmas Eve" bash.

I'll save the bah-humbug for when I realize 2011 is just as shitty as 2010 was.

Glad to hear about your Mom, and I hope you all have a great holiday. Now get the fuck out of the Airing of Grievances thread unless you have some grievances.

[NiX]

Fuck this cold for ruining my chance to slack off the week before my Christmas vacation.

[Hoax]

Fuck the posters who have turned f13 into a place where I don't really feel comfortable posting a proper in the spirit post in this thread, so I'll leave this lame ass post instead although this post is a lot less lame then all the fuck politicians and world hunger bullshit most of you are posting.

You know who you all are, enjoy your groupthink politics board your pet issues threads and your special posters forum and the squeaky wheel bitching you do to get anyone who doesn't play nice enough with you all banned from the boards.

[dusematic]

Hey shitstains, this isn't a pity-party or a Hallmark card.  More personal attacks please.


Fuck Falconeer for making a post two years ago about the moral quandary he was facing over whether or not he should celebrate Thanksgiving.  And fuck the people who took that shit seriously.  And let's not forget his post about how he has a problem with people "using synonyms of homosexual as a blanket pejorative term."  What a limp-wristed little bitch.  And I'm not talking about carpal-tunnel, faggot.

[HaemishM]

Fuck dusematic for continually redefining the standard for internet douchecockery.

[dusematic]

Fuck dusematic for continually redefining the standard for internet douchecockery.

That's it old friend...let the poison out.


Fuck you for thinking Empire: Total War was a good game and that it was acceptable that it was released in the state it was since you could "just mod it" anyway.  Do me a favor and make your sig longer so I can safely go on not caring about any of the various poopbreath endeavors that you incessantly plug in the grimiest manner possible.  The Lenin Monologues were worse than the Vagina Monologues.