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Author Topic: Internet Dating: Everyone's still shallow  (Read 407374 times)
Selby
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Reply #735 on: October 12, 2010, 07:41:46 PM

So the 2nd person who ever responded to me via okcupid is actually fun to talk to and hang out with.  Who would have guessed?  I'm just waiting for some type of crazy or personality flaw to show up...
schild
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Reply #736 on: October 12, 2010, 07:58:13 PM

So the 2nd person who ever responded to me via okcupid is actually fun to talk to and hang out with.  Who would have guessed?  I'm just waiting for some type of crazy or personality flaw to show up...
Sounds like you want to be alone.

Edit: Also, I suppose now it's a good time to respond to your first post on the subject:
Quote
You'll have to share some.
The people whose profile lists their religion (completely different than yours) and how it's their life and for some reason the matcher thinks you 2 would do well together.

The person who has never dated anyone and is 40 years old (and lives with their parents) and has some REALLY odd ideas on what they think dating should be like...

All I've gotten so far though is one person who likes to talk about video games and music playing with me, everyone else has not responded to my messages ;-)  Hence it's mostly a waste of time, but I get to read crazy profiles.
So, two responses and one turned out pretty good? Sure, it took 2-3 months but there's some combination of location / otherwise that was at play there. Not to mention possible age bracket and well, really, maybe they think you're crazy?

Anyway, grats?
« Last Edit: October 12, 2010, 08:14:57 PM by schild »
Selby
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Reply #737 on: October 12, 2010, 08:45:28 PM

So, two responses and one turned out pretty good? Sure, it took 2-3 months but there's some combination of location / otherwise that was at play there. Not to mention possible age bracket and well, really, maybe they think you're crazy?
I think it's a combination of the fact that I have a kid, I look like a scary headbanger, and don't do any drugs or drink?  A friend of mine said living in the San Francisco bay area is going to be hard to date since she said it's very male-centric and I don't date guys.  But seriously, fuck if I know.  It's not like I'm listing my WoW accomplishments or my D&D character stats all over the place, so I don't come off as the "obvious" nerd type.  And I'm not exactly refusing to cast a wide net age-wise or anything.  As I said, fuck if I know.
Nerf
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Reply #738 on: October 13, 2010, 02:03:19 AM

You'd think that the high concentration of gay dudes would increase your chances, not decrease them.  It shifts the effective male:female ratio drastically in your favor.

As for dating - take her shooting.  Seriously.  I'm sure theres a range around there somewhere that rents pistols, it'll probably cost you $50-60 for rental fees, range fees, and ammo for 2.  I've never had a shooting date go poorly, it's exciting, fun, and 90% of the time pretty rewarding for the woman, as females will almost always shoot far better than males if neither have any experience.

While not a date, this is the closest thing I can give you for how awesome shooting stuff is - my mother-in-law(to be) *hates* guns.  She started crying when stef told her that I had A (1) gun, she called her sister and they both had a little panic-attack weepfest thinking that one night my gun was just going to gain sentience, sprout legs, and murder us in our sleep.  Stef decided it best to not mention the other 11 at this time.

MIL(tb) visited us about a month ago, and before she left we took her to a local shooting range.  It took about 10 rounds from my Ruger Mk III .22lr pistol and she was hooked.  She kept asking for another loaded mag, and wanted to shoot all of the other guns.  Only one she wouldn't touch was the .308 AR, as she was afraid of the recoil after putting a few hot self-defense rounds out of a compact 9mm downrange, it was a bit snappy.

Grinning from ear to ear the entire time, and kept saying she wanted to shoot a lot more the next time she visited - 24 hours prior she didn't even want to be in the same house as guns.

If that doesn't work for you, find somewhere with indoor rockclimbing if you're not in terrible shape - the exercise+adrenaline will help your chances immensely.
If you're in terrible shape, find somewhere with go-kart racing that has reasonably fast karts, same reasons as above.

If you're in terrible shape, and you can't find anything exciting to do, get a friend to 'mug' you while walking back to your car/train station/whatever, make sure he has a shiny (but dull) knife, and be a hero.  Make sure you immediately grab her and put her behind you, and then fend him off in a way that a real mugger would be able to escape from so that he can quickly run the fuck away.*

*Don't try this in Texas, we all carry guns, it's pretty fucking impossible to get a carry permit in CA, so your friend should be safe.
Ironwood
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Reply #739 on: October 13, 2010, 02:36:02 AM

 ACK!

"Mr Soft Owl has Seen Some Shit." - Sun Tzu
Nerf
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Reply #740 on: October 13, 2010, 02:44:26 AM

ACK!

What? Doesn't everyone use the fake mugging?
lamaros
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Reply #741 on: October 13, 2010, 02:46:02 AM

Are you finally outing yourself as a joke account?
Arthur_Parker
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Reply #742 on: October 13, 2010, 03:03:17 AM

You can't unring the crazy bell.
Ironwood
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Reply #743 on: October 13, 2010, 04:05:49 AM

ACK!

What? Doesn't everyone use the fake mugging?

We can't manage this in Scotland;  every time we try, the guys always get carried away and end up stabbing and robbing friends.

It gets messy.

"Mr Soft Owl has Seen Some Shit." - Sun Tzu
Mosesandstick
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Reply #744 on: October 13, 2010, 05:22:00 AM

Carried away? It's the norm for them  awesome, for real
Cyrrex
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Reply #745 on: October 13, 2010, 05:34:30 AM

You'd think that the high concentration of gay dudes would increase your chances, not decrease them.  It shifts the effective male:female ratio drastically in your favor.

As for dating - take her shooting.  Seriously.  I'm sure theres a range around there somewhere that rents pistols, it'll probably cost you $50-60 for rental fees, range fees, and ammo for 2.  I've never had a shooting date go poorly, it's exciting, fun, and 90% of the time pretty rewarding for the woman, as females will almost always shoot far better than males if neither have any experience.

While not a date, this is the closest thing I can give you for how awesome shooting stuff is - my mother-in-law(to be) *hates* guns.  She started crying when stef told her that I had A (1) gun, she called her sister and they both had a little panic-attack weepfest thinking that one night my gun was just going to gain sentience, sprout legs, and murder us in our sleep.  Stef decided it best to not mention the other 11 at this time.

MIL(tb) visited us about a month ago, and before she left we took her to a local shooting range.  It took about 10 rounds from my Ruger Mk III .22lr pistol and she was hooked.  She kept asking for another loaded mag, and wanted to shoot all of the other guns.  Only one she wouldn't touch was the .308 AR, as she was afraid of the recoil after putting a few hot self-defense rounds out of a compact 9mm downrange, it was a bit snappy.

Grinning from ear to ear the entire time, and kept saying she wanted to shoot a lot more the next time she visited - 24 hours prior she didn't even want to be in the same house as guns.

If that doesn't work for you, find somewhere with indoor rockclimbing if you're not in terrible shape - the exercise+adrenaline will help your chances immensely.
If you're in terrible shape, find somewhere with go-kart racing that has reasonably fast karts, same reasons as above.

If you're in terrible shape, and you can't find anything exciting to do, get a friend to 'mug' you while walking back to your car/train station/whatever, make sure he has a shiny (but dull) knife, and be a hero.  Make sure you immediately grab her and put her behind you, and then fend him off in a way that a real mugger would be able to escape from so that he can quickly run the fuck away.*

*Don't try this in Texas, we all carry guns, it's pretty fucking impossible to get a carry permit in CA, so your friend should be safe.

The fun part of this post is in trying to find the parts that aren't batshit crazy.  I'm still looking!

"...maybe if you cleaned the piss out of the sunny d bottles under your desks and returned em, you could upgrade you vid cards, fucken lusers.." - Grunk
tgr
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Reply #746 on: October 13, 2010, 06:29:58 AM

Well, I don't consider rock climbing as that insane, if that helps.

Cyno's lit, bridge is up, but one pilot won't be jumping home.
bhodi
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No lie.


Reply #747 on: October 13, 2010, 07:17:18 AM

Well, I don't consider rock climbing as that insane, if that helps.

It is. Don't do this. Trust me.
Minvaren
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Reply #748 on: October 13, 2010, 08:27:02 AM

So the 2nd person who ever responded to me via okcupid is actually fun to talk to and hang out with.  Who would have guessed?  I'm just waiting for some type of crazy or personality flaw to show up...

FWIW, grats.   Oh ho ho ho. Reallllly?

"There are many things of which a wise man might wish to remain ignorant." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Reply #749 on: October 13, 2010, 09:09:39 AM

Nothing can go wrong with a fake mugging.

Mrbloodworth
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Reply #750 on: October 13, 2010, 09:13:29 AM

Thought they did that in Flight of the Concords.

Today's How-To: Scrambling a Thread to the Point of Incoherence in Only One Post with MrBloodworth . - schild
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K9
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Reply #751 on: October 13, 2010, 03:11:29 PM

Solid advice, straight out of the Travis Bickle school of dating  why so serious?

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Tale
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Reply #752 on: October 13, 2010, 04:03:45 PM

I tried online dating again in July after stupidly breaking up with a girl I met online, to go back to my ex, who it turned out was just messing with me. I moved on.

Australia's biggest online dating site is called RSVP. It features a "top 100" of the most-contacted profiles. I reached number 3. More women than I could meet.

Somehow that made it worse - lots of first dates, no chemistry. The girls I liked tended to think I was too nice and bemoan their attraction to bad guys, while the girls I didn't like tended to think I was their perfect man. Thought I'd met the right girl one time, but on the way to our second date she decided she wasn't ready to start dating again. So I quit as Australia's third-hottest man.

It continues to be a very draining experience, building up to meeting someone you already know heaps about, then having nothing come of it. Recently I've been more successful offline.
« Last Edit: October 13, 2010, 04:09:05 PM by Tale »
Paelos
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Error 404: Title not found.


Reply #753 on: October 13, 2010, 04:29:17 PM

So I quit as Australia's third-hottest man.

I just found this little tidbit quite funny.

CPA, CFO, Sports Fan, Game when I have the time
Murgos
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Reply #754 on: October 14, 2010, 04:12:56 AM

It continues to be a very draining experience, building up to meeting someone you already know heaps about, then having nothing come of it. Recently I've been more successful offline.

My experience was to not spending lots of time getting to know someone through emails.  It just doesn't work that way.  The last half of my online dating I pushed very hard to meet in person for 10 or 15 minutes within two or three days of emailing.  15 minutes in person is worth 1000 emails, to twist an analogy.

"You have all recieved youre last warning. I am in the process of currently tracking all of youre ips and pinging your home adressess. you should not have commencemed a war with me" - Aaron Rayburn
schild
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Reply #755 on: October 14, 2010, 06:32:47 AM

I tried online dating again in July after stupidly breaking up with a girl I met online, to go back to my ex, who it turned out was just messing with me. I moved on.

Australia's biggest online dating site is called RSVP. It features a "top 100" of the most-contacted profiles. I reached number 3. More women than I could meet.

Somehow that made it worse - lots of first dates, no chemistry. The girls I liked tended to think I was too nice and bemoan their attraction to bad guys, while the girls I didn't like tended to think I was their perfect man. Thought I'd met the right girl one time, but on the way to our second date she decided she wasn't ready to start dating again. So I quit as Australia's third-hottest man.

It continues to be a very draining experience, building up to meeting someone you already know heaps about, then having nothing come of it. Recently I've been more successful offline.
Why are there so many misplaced Jersey douchebags in Australia?
Engels
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Reply #756 on: October 14, 2010, 07:47:31 AM

The girls I liked tended to think I was too nice and bemoan their attraction to bad guys, while the girls I didn't like tended to think I was their perfect man.
Congratulations on being every man in existence. Trust me, there was at least -one- girl saying to Mr. Manson,"Sorry, Charlie, you're just not mean enough for me"

I should get back to nature, too.  You know, like going to a shop for groceries instead of the computer.  Maybe a condo in the woods that doesn't even have a health club or restaurant attached.  Buy a car with only two cup holders or something. -Signe

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Murgos
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Reply #757 on: October 14, 2010, 07:55:22 AM

Trust me, there was at least -one- girl saying to Mr. Manson,"Sorry, Charlie, you're just not mean enough for me"

At a guess, it was probably Sharon Tate.

"You have all recieved youre last warning. I am in the process of currently tracking all of youre ips and pinging your home adressess. you should not have commencemed a war with me" - Aaron Rayburn
Minvaren
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Reply #758 on: October 14, 2010, 08:14:22 AM

The REALLY good part is when you stop and think about it for a minute.   That's what they're willing to admit to a stranger, so imagine the deep, dark recesses of crazy they're keeping secret.  You know, so they don't seem weird.

For that reason alone, online dating can be a massive ego boost at times.   awesome, for real

Most recent date : relatively pleasant woman, near 50, no relationship experience, "heretofore unknown by man."   ACK!

"There are many things of which a wise man might wish to remain ignorant." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Lantyssa
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Reply #759 on: October 14, 2010, 11:46:25 AM

DRILLING AND WOMANLINESS

Hahahaha!  I'm really good at this!
Raging Turtle
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Reply #760 on: October 14, 2010, 02:00:12 PM

Well, I don't consider rock climbing as that insane, if that helps.

It is. Don't do this. Trust me.

I went to an indoor rock-climbing place on a date with someone from Okcupid in March, and it might have been the best date I've been on.  That whole doing-physical-things together really, really works - I'd never go on a first date where the only thing to do is make conversation. 

We're still seeing each other.  awesome, for real
 
Minvaren
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Reply #761 on: October 14, 2010, 02:36:39 PM

Behold, the two-factor theory of emotion in action.   awesome, for real

"There are many things of which a wise man might wish to remain ignorant." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
bhodi
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No lie.


Reply #762 on: October 14, 2010, 09:49:52 PM

I went to an indoor rock-climbing place on a date with someone from Okcupid in March, and it might have been the best date I've been on.  That whole doing-physical-things together really, really works - I'd never go on a first date where the only thing to do is make conversation.  

We're still seeing each other.  awesome, for real

If it works for you, great!

I suppose the difference is that there is a wide skill variance between say me and a date, and it is also something that's difficult without a little bit of practice - no one walking in off the street is going to have enough finger/arm strength or technique, and the general consensus at our gym is that it's just a bad idea :)

Something physical for a date, sure, but not something so specialized.
Murgos
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Reply #763 on: October 15, 2010, 04:08:21 AM

Rock climbing probably works better as a date if both parties are novices.

"You have all recieved youre last warning. I am in the process of currently tracking all of youre ips and pinging your home adressess. you should not have commencemed a war with me" - Aaron Rayburn
Raging Turtle
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Reply #764 on: October 15, 2010, 05:15:37 AM

Didn't think about that, but yeah, we both were. 
Selby
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Reply #765 on: October 15, 2010, 12:20:34 PM

I'd never go on a first date where the only thing to do is make conversation. 
Eh, different strokes.  When I first met the person, we talked for almost 3 hours about all sorts of different things.  It was fun talking to someone again!
Draegan
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Reply #766 on: October 15, 2010, 12:31:23 PM

My single OKCupid dating experience started by exchanging emails with a girl on a Sunday and Monday.  Phone conversations on Tuesday through Friday.  Then a date on Saturday. 

The wedding is in April.



Nerf
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Reply #767 on: October 15, 2010, 12:43:53 PM

I went to an indoor rock-climbing place on a date with someone from Okcupid in March, and it might have been the best date I've been on.  That whole doing-physical-things together really, really works - I'd never go on a first date where the only thing to do is make conversation.  

We're still seeing each other.  awesome, for real

If it works for you, great!

I suppose the difference is that there is a wide skill variance between say me and a date, and it is also something that's difficult without a little bit of practice - no one walking in off the street is going to have enough finger/arm strength or technique, and the general consensus at our gym is that it's just a bad idea :)

Something physical for a date, sure, but not something so specialized.

I did mean indoor rock climbing, not hardcore outdoor stuff, and I'm pretty sure the indoor stuff is far, far easier - I've only climbed the little indoor walls at events maybe 4 or 5 times in my life, and a few weeks ago at the state fair I was able to make it up the 'hard' side (tiny foot/hand holds, with a 1.5-2' or so bulge coming out towards you a little over 1/2 way up.  Took me 40 seconds with a fucked up shoulder from laying sod the week prior and a handgun in my pocket.

And I'm NOT in good shape - it can't be that hard unless the wall was just so simple it was a joke and I don't know better.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g-2VVWVH6cs

Edit: The fumbling at the top is because I thought there was a bell. There was no bell  Heartbreak
« Last Edit: October 15, 2010, 12:46:58 PM by Nerf »
01101010
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Reply #768 on: October 15, 2010, 12:52:49 PM

For the longest time I avoided even reading this thread, but being newly separated has made me go back and read through all 22 pages. I had a great laugh, but really would like to unsee this thread now, thanks.

Does any one know where the love of God goes...When the waves turn the minutes to hours? -G. Lightfoot
bhodi
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No lie.


Reply #769 on: October 15, 2010, 01:22:58 PM

I did mean indoor rock climbing, not hardcore outdoor stuff, and I'm pretty sure the indoor stuff is far, far easier - I've only climbed the little indoor walls at events maybe 4 or 5 times in my life, and a few weeks ago at the state fair I was able to make it up the 'hard' side (tiny foot/hand holds, with a 1.5-2' or so bulge coming out towards you a little over 1/2 way up.  Took me 40 seconds with a fucked up shoulder from laying sod the week prior and a handgun in my pocket.

And I'm NOT in good shape - it can't be that hard unless the wall was just so simple it was a joke and I don't know better.

You did fine, and I think with practice you could do very well. As for how hard it was, well, yes, it's a novice route, but it's at a goddamned state fair and you have no training. You aren't going to be doing the iron cross on the side of the mountain like in mission impossible. Also that autobelay has been recalled from the market, they really shouldn't be using it :/

I did mean indoor, yeah. I just feel that trying to include someone into anything that you do as a hobby that requires skill and training is a bad idea if you perform on a whole other level. It's perfectly fine to include people on things that you like, but I just don't think it's first or second date material that's all.

Congratulations Draegan, that's pretty awesome!
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