Ninja Assassin

[stray]

There is no trailer. I will pimp out a movie solely because of it's title.  

Stars k-pop [read non-martial artist] star Rain. It's a Wachowski flick, but perhaps they'll redeem themselves. I'll give them a thumbs up for having this many Asians in a western production though (kudos), but also, a thumbs down for mistaking Koreans as Japanese.





[edit] Oh, and Sho Kusugi apparently makes a cameo in this.

[WindupAtheist]

Koreans miscast as Japanese! Oh noes!

God I hate when people say shit like this. It never comes up with any other race. Nobody gives a shit when a Frenchman plays an Italian or an Argentinian plays a Brazilian or what the fuck ever. Enough of this "Asians can only play their own specific nationality or it's The Man(tm) being ignorant!" crap. It's not the 19th century, people know that Korea and Japan are two different countries, they just don't give a shit because the two ethnicities look broadly similar and that's close enough for make-believe.

Rant over. Sorry Stray. Can't help myself. 

[stray]

Heh.. I'm not even all that serious, man. Don't get me wrong. Just taking the piss out of it a bit.. Looking for some reason to not sound total fanboy over an unreleased Wachowski flick. That would be worse. :P

Either way, Sho is in it. He's Japanese. Good enough!

[UnSub]

It never comes up with any other race.

Like when an American plays an English(wo)man!



Like when an American plays a Mongol!



Like when a black man plays a white character!





It happens all the time. People love to complain about things they've got set in their heads.

[Margalis]

Hugh Jackman as a Canadian?!??! THIS CANNOT STAND.

[schild]

I wasn't aware that all ninja assassins had to be Japanese.

Christopher Lambert - is he the exception to the rule because he trained under an actual Japanese guy (in The Hunted)? Just wonedering. Admittedly, that was more samurai than ninja. But there were ninjas! I bet a few of them were white!

[stray]

Lee Van Cleef is my favorite white ninja. Nothing wrong with Lambert or Cleef or non-Japanese ninjas! The difference here is that Rain is cast as a guy named Raizo. And that was only a passing complaint, done in jest. I have no interest in saying any more than that.

That all said, there aren't enough of ninja flicks these days! So I'll take this, despite whatever I say. ;)

[K9]

Have the Wachowski brothers made anything since the first Matrix which hasn't been terrible?

[stray]

V for Vendetta wasn't all that bad.

[K9]

Oh yeah, that was decent.

[dusematic]

Koreans miscast as Japanese! Oh noes!

God I hate when people say shit like this. It never comes up with any other race. Nobody gives a shit when a Frenchman plays an Italian or an Argentinian plays a Brazilian or what the fuck ever. Enough of this "Asians can only play their own specific nationality or it's The Man(tm) being ignorant!" crap. It's not the 19th century, people know that Korea and Japan are two different countries, they just don't give a shit because the two ethnicities look broadly similar and that's close enough for make-believe.

Rant over. Sorry Stray. Can't help myself. 

LOL.  Right on.

[Nevermore]

Is it ok if a Korean is the last vampire?

[dusematic]

It never comes up with any other race.

Like when an American plays an English(wo)man!



Like when an American plays a Mongol!



Like when a black man plays a white character!





It happens all the time. People love to complain about things they've got set in their heads.

Uh, except for the possible exception of the John Wayne movie, the only widespread criticism of those movies you mentioned were that they were retarded.  Nobody was crying racist.  And although I wasn't around in the 50s or whenever that JW movie was made, I'm willing to bet most people didn't care.  

By the dubs, I love how whenever anyone makes a goddamn point on this site, some pedantic asshole feels like it's his god given duty to pick up the sword of truth and wade into battle screaming "YOU FORGOT ABOUT THIS IRRELEVANT EXCEPTION MUTHAFUCKAAAAAA!"

Let's just start couching our every word and turn of phrase.  We'll just constantly hedge our bets until no one can say anything without signing a boilerplate waiver as long as Peter North's cock!  

[Brogarn]

From Korean Ninja Assassins to the size of Peter North's cock. Never click a thread on f13 without first gathering your resolve because you never know what you'll find.

[dusematic]

I was going to say your cock, but it wouldn't have made any sense, what with you having a micropenis and all.

[stray]

Is it ok if a Korean is the last vampire?

I was going to mention that... I think the other thing may be that right now k-drama and k-pop entertainers might simply have the best agents. :) They're showing up in different types of parts lately. One guy even got a role in that Wolverine flick (he's hapa actually, but got his start in Korea). So I've got to chalk it up to whoever handles these actors too.. Because the crossover casting hasn't happened in the same way for Chinese and Japanese actors.

[stray]

Nobody was crying racist.

Nor am I. I AM a racist.  I'm already inclined to hate white people, until proven otherwise. So don't think I'm here to cry, or want a debate, or want understanding from you. That's going too far, man!

[AutomaticZen]

I wasn't aware that all ninja assassins had to be Japanese.

Christopher Lambert - is he the exception to the rule because he trained under an actual Japanese guy (in The Hunted)? Just wonedering. Admittedly, that was more samurai than ninja. But there were ninjas! I bet a few of them were white!

You forgot the Nine Greatest Ninjas of them all were not japanese.

[Brogarn]

I was going to say your cock, but it wouldn't have made any sense, what with you having a micropenis and all.

 

[WindupAtheist]

Nor am I. I AM a racist.  I'm already inclined to hate white people, until proven otherwise. So don't think I'm here to cry, or want a debate, or want understanding from you. That's going too far, man!

Hate white people? What did WE ever do? 

[dusematic]

Nobody was crying racist.

Nor am I. I AM a racist.  I'm already inclined to hate white people, until proven otherwise. So don't think I'm here to cry, or want a debate, or want understanding from you. That's going too far, man!

LOL. The dude abides.

[DraconianOne]

V for Vendetta wasn't all that bad.

They only wrote that and obviously it was an adptation.  They're also only producing this - it's being directed by James McTeigue who directed V for Vendetta (and, um, the lamentable "The Invasion") and it's written by first timer Matthew Sand and some dude called J. Michael Straczynski who apparently has done a couple of things that have appealed to geeks.

[stray]

Ah, thanks for the clarification.

[Ingmar]

In case anyone needs a reminder on who Rain is:

http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/156555/may-05-2008/rain-dance-off

 

[Merusk]

Wow forgot this derailed into a stupid, stupid place.


Just watched the movie. (Go go single disc Netflix queue.  Watch a movie 2 years later.)   It was kind of fun but good lord the blood.  This movie and DA2 must have had the same guy for effects.

Like all ninja movies, ignore the whole "we've got guns, let's try to get up close and personal with those pajama dudes." thing.

[WindupAtheist]

Yeah the trained soldiers with guns getting pwned by dudes with swords was pretty dumb by any normal standard, but you know... There are some movies where if you don't like what you're getting, then it's not the movie's fault. It's your fault for watching it. This movie sold itself as ninja violence porn and delivered.

[Merusk]

Well, yeah. I didn't have a problem with it at all until the last fight, actually.   I was wondering why they just didn't bomb the base instead of "zomg send in the ground forces!"  Still, a fun movie all around.

[bhodi]

I, too, enjoyed the movie. They didn't bomb the base because there were friendlies inside, one of which had the transmitter. I enjoyed soldiers eating it when they were in tiny rooms, but even more I enjoyed the last scene where ninja were getting killed by the dozens due to lack of cover and being outside. I shamelessly enjoyed all the tropes, especially the whole "Master swordsman sees a technique and so can perform it flawlessly seconds later" bit at the end.

[Slyfeind]

"Master swordsman sees a technique and so can perform it flawlessly seconds later"

I love that because when I came to terms with it, all I can think of is "Holy shit, not only he fights awesomely, but he LEARNS awesomely."

[Teleku]

I actually really liked this movie.  The ending was wonderful.  They spend the whole movie killing people with knives using all their special ninja magic against people in dark rooms.  Then the military just surrounds their compound at the end and slaughters them all.  "Haha assholes, how do you like machine guns and spot lights!"

[SurfD]

Yeah the trained soldiers with guns getting pwned by dudes with swords was pretty dumb by any normal standard, but you know... There are some movies where if you don't like what you're getting, then it's not the movie's fault. It's your fault for watching it. This movie sold itself as ninja violence porn and delivered.

Eh, I never really had a problem with that.  I mean, they are Ninja.  They spend their entire lives training to be sneaky bastards who kill you from the shadows.   I mean, hell, rule number one of a ninja is pretty much "never let them see you killing them".

So the whole scene where a dozen of them slaughter the soldier team in a blacked out building worked for me.   Add in that the soldiers pretty much believed that these were "kooks in black pajamas, not to be taken seriously" and not hardened killing machines, and it makes even more sense.

And as people pointed out, this is easily balanced by the turn around of "EAT GIANT SPOTLIGHTS BASTARDS" at the end of the movie.  Strip away the Ninja's native advantage of stealth and shadow, and all you are left with is a guy in black pajamas with swords and throwing knives.

[Teleku]

And again, this wasn't just military being killed by expert knife fighters.  They were using god damn MAGIC the entire time.  They could teleport from one location to the other instantly from the shadows, or just melt into them to get away, like in some anime.  It was an over the top movie about sword fighters with magical super powers.  They didn't even attempt to portray the ninja's in a realistic manner.  So you should enjoy it as more of a super hero/live action anime type movie.