Top Chef Season 5

[voodoolily]

I love it when Stefan flirts with Jamie just to fuck with her and make fun of her lesbianism.

[Righ]

Being surrounded by all these mediocre chefs is causing Fabio to cruise, and its showing. Hosea is starting to think too much about Stefan's mind games instead of beating him in the kitchen. They're both safe for weeks yet, but they're going to need to pick up their focus soon if they don't want Stefan to walk away with this in the final.

You could see that they were reluctant to send Ariane packing because she has a decent palette and has made some good food compared to most of the other filler chefs - I suspect that like me they had pigeonholed her, Carla and Jeff into 'final six filler'. New boy Toby impressed Tom with his judging on that one, and I agreed too. We want them all cut, but if the producers demand stringing out the series for more product placement, she was the biggest fuck-up and any amount of good dishes in weeks when others' were worse doesn't excuse that much fuck-uppery. Tom called it dishonoring the food. She totally honored that meat in the most American way. By beating it senseless. Unfortunately honor/dishonor doesn't help make food taste better, and so she's gone. One more down, so many to go.

[Nebu]

I think they're just going to continue to cut people based on future potential.  Ariane had done everything she could but still could never be a "Top Chef".  The show isn't "Top Worker Bee". 

Jeff has promise but doesn't know how to edit.  Radikah is too meek and a one-note.  etc. 

Fabio, Stefan, and Hosea are the real leaders here and will be in the finals unless one of them serves raw meat.  Hell, Fabio served raw meat a couple episodes ago and he still didn't go home. 

[Azaroth]

I love it when Stefan flirts with Jamie just to fuck with her and make fun of her lesbianism.

I think she's cute as hell.

Anyway, let's see what restaurant wars brings.

Hopefully not a bag of fail?


Edit: Excuse me. Hopefully not "Monkey ass in an empty clam shell".

[Azaroth]

And by the way, does anyone else fucking HATE Toby Young?

I've found his obviously prepared "witty" comments to be akward and anything but witty. He's trying too hard to be funny and witty, and it's just fucking embarassing. IMO.

[schild]

Everyone hates Toby Young. That's been the theme of his life since he came to America.

[Azaroth]

Cya Radhika or Carla.

Obviously eliminations are obvious.

Leah is preserving herself through sluttiness.

Edit: Nvm. Radhika. She's the leader in a Restaurant Wars episode on the losing team.

[eldaec]

And by the way, does anyone else fucking HATE Toby Young?

Being an unfunny dick is his thing now.  It has been ever since he made more money writing a book about how he is a dick than from anything else he'll ever do. It keeps getting him gigs, so you can't blame the guy any more.

He isn't really a food writer though, he's done a few crappy reviews for the Standard (London tabloid), but I have no idea why he is on this show.

[Trippy]

And by the way, does anyone else fucking HATE Toby Young?

I've found his obviously prepared "witty" comments to be akward and anything but witty. He's trying too hard to be funny and witty, and it's just fucking embarassing. IMO.

Yes I see his presence on the show being akin to Dennis Miller being on Monday Night Football.

[Azaroth]

While that episode was possibly the best of this season, it was nowhere near as entertaining or inspiring as past Restaurant Wars.

[Trippy]

Fabio was hilarious.

[Nebu]

This has become the Fabio and Stephan show.  If either of them get sent home, I'm done watching.  There's just noone else with both the leadership and talent to be considered Top Chef.

[Sauced]

"We could-a serve monkey ass on a empty clam-a shell, we still gonna win dis ting"

[HaemishM]

And by the way, does anyone else fucking HATE Toby Young?

I've found his obviously prepared "witty" comments to be akward and anything but witty. He's trying too hard to be funny and witty, and it's just fucking embarassing. IMO.

Yes. He's trying to be old school Dennis Miller (before he went full batshit conservatard) without any of the wit, charm or intelligence. I really really want them to send Leah and Jamie home as well, though at least Jamie seems like a competent cook. Carla is just batshit insane and both Leah and Carla should have gone home over Radikha... except that the judges fucking hate it when the leader of the losing Restaurant Wars team does fuckall but mince around and look lost. If not for Stefan's dessert and Fabio's charm (the monky ass quote was money), the cheating dim bulb goes home for epic fish fail.

I think Chef Tom is absolutely gobsmacked at how many bad chefs are on this season. When Carla told him she was sending the shitty yogurt dishes out with LOVE, I thought his head was going to assplode.

[schild]

It's fairly obvious at this point that Tom was not involved in picking the chefs for this season, where he may have been previously.

[Abagadro]

The only smart person in this whole episode was Jamie who said she wanted nothing to do with being the team leader for restaurant wars. It's a guaranteed 50% chance of going home. 

[Signe]

I don't mind Toby Young.  He's funny and snarky and makes me laugh.  I've even read a bit of one of his books.  He is actually pretty witty and very smart.  He is also, somewhat unfortunately, completely in love with himself, which can be annoying sometimes.  I'd love to see some of the "Have I Got New for You" episodes he did.

[schild]

Odd, he hasn't come off as smart, funny, or snarky.

More dumb, out of place, and entirely unfunny.

[Signe]

It might not be the best forum for him, but I think he's alright.  Ted wasn't all that, either.  I'm trying to think who would be just perfect for that job and I can't think of anyone off hand.  There must be someone suitable out there.  Half the people on this board would be better than either Ted or Toby.  I wonder if having a T name is mandatory.  If so, maybe Trippy.  He's good at very nearly almost everything.

[Ookii]

I'm trying to think who would be just perfect for that job and I can't think of anyone off hand.  There must be someone suitable out there. 

Bourdain.

[schild]

It might not be the best forum for him, but I think he's alright.  Ted wasn't all that, either.  I'm trying to think who would be just perfect for that job and I can't think of anyone off hand.  There must be someone suitable out there.  Half the people on this board would be better than either Ted or Toby.  I wonder if having a T name is mandatory.  If so, maybe Trippy.  He's good at very nearly almost everything.

Not sure anyone implied Ted was good either. Toby just happens to be worse. Somehow.

[Signe]

I'm trying to think who would be just perfect for that job and I can't think of anyone off hand.  There must be someone suitable out there. 

Bourdain.

That might work.  He's smart, funny, and he'll eat (at least try) anything.  I've liked his guest spotss.  I bet his input would have the contestants using some odd bits of... uhh... thingies.  The only problem I see is whether he can be trusted around the female chefs!  And the other way around, too!  He seems much better suited for the show, I think.

[Evildrider]

I don't think Bourdain will be back on the show, wasn't he pissed off at them about something?

[Numtini]

Ted would occasionally get off something worth listening too, and for that came out above neutral. But Toby is constantly comes off like he's squinting at a cue card and is annoying in general. I'd rather have an empty seat.

I'm starting to blame production and direction for this season. Restaurant wars is really the sort of top episode of the season and this was just awful. Yes, the chefs are not doing well and clearly the show needs some shaking up when you have people avoiding leader because the leader getting sacked is a cliche. But I can't even remember what they cooked, the themes barely got touched on at all. Only thing I really remember was who was rumbling around in bed and "kissing" whom.

[Azaroth]

Booting Radhika was ridiculous partly for that reason.

It's a fucking cooking competition. She didn't cook anything, Tom. It's not Top Waiter, sorry. I'm also sorry that you didn't get your goodbye, and seemed to make a bigger deal out of that than of anything that happened the entire episode. Ge tthe fuck over it. You don't cook a goodbye.

She did a fairly poor job leading, fine. She also brought one of the ONLY unique (if one dimensional) repetoires to the show. Jeff SHOULD have been front of house, and everyone pretty much pointed that out, but he squirmed out of the responsibility because he knew what the fuck was going to happen to the leader of the losing team.

Saying she made no decisions was ridiculous as well.  Yes, she did.

In the scene with her tasting the cake, she said "That'll be fine". Maybe it was a bad decision, but she made the decision. Ultimately as a competition of chefs, though, someone making a bad dish isn't completely her fault.

Granted if and when Sahana lost, there were only two real choices. Choosing Radhika was valid. But like Numtini said, it's getting a little stupid when the leader of the losing team just gets booted each time because it's easy to blame EVERYTHING on them - and because people at the judges table can often be head chefs and owners who lead the teams and want to overemphasize the great and amazing importance of their roles to themselves by booting anyone who fucks it up, blaming the entire debacle on them.

[Nebu]

Radhika was going to get the boot eventually.  It was really a matter of when. 

The fact was that she was in charge.  That being the case, a smart leader on a COOKING SHOW should have chosen to be in the kitchen.  I would have booted her too.  Giving her $100k to start a restaurant would have been like lighting the cash on fire. 

[Righ]

She did a fairly poor job leading, fine. She also brought one of the ONLY unique (if one dimensional) repetoires to the show. Jeff SHOULD have been front of house, and everyone pretty much pointed that out, but he squirmed out of the responsibility because he knew what the fuck was going to happen to the leader of the losing team.

Making Jeff front of house wouldn't have made him leader, just as Fabio did not become the leader when he was selected to be front of house. Just sayin.

Granted if and when Sahana lost, there were only two real choices. Choosing Radhika was valid. But like Numtini said, it's getting a little stupid when the leader of the losing team just gets booted each time because it's easy to blame EVERYTHING on them - and because people at the judges table can often be head chefs and owners who lead the teams and want to overemphasize the great and amazing importance of their roles to themselves by booting anyone who fucks it up, blaming the entire debacle on them.

It is a TV show. There are any number of little cheats going on for the sake of "good TV". Fabio, Stefan and Hosea could have made the most de-lish food in the first part, and nobody would have owned up - they were not going to be the team leaders because they've already led, and they've already passed. The next few weeks decide who goes into the final couple of episodes with them. They chose the leaders they did because they were among the people who are on the chopping block. For good reason. They're terrible.

Radish and Barmy were the two most miserable contributors to the show this week. That was identified, and clearly the judges wanted to get rid of both, but those wacky producers seem to want a few more weeks of this show for some reason. There's probably some other T-Mobile device they want to sell. The only reason you could possibly object to Radish being cut is that you are jonesing for Barmy to leave. We all are. It'll happen.

[Azaroth]

Making Jeff front of house wouldn't have made him leader, just as Fabio did not become the leader when he was selected to be front of house. Just sayin.

Give me a break. I was commenting on a cooking show at 2am.

[Righ]

It's top oats! How about that? Carla says she's an oats girl. You're really more of a nuts girl darling.

Well... that was nearly Fabio's last night in the bonky bed. Stefan cooked the worst crap, and pulled a stupid move by choosing a chef he thought would be weak. But he was never in danger. He's Stefan - great TV and he's cooked more good food than the rest of them put together. Fabio made yet another basic cooking mistake, but more than anything, it was the guest judge who took an instant dislike to him. He wanted blood, and only an all out assault on Jeff's short-cut saved him. Phew.

And so Carla, Jamie and Leah manage not to be eliminated yet. Who will be out next? It probably won't be Fabio, even if he undercooks or overcooks something.

[schild]

I just watched restaurant wars. Carla is a loopy bitch. She needs to go away.

[Ookii]

I would think Fabio would go out before Jamie, but I hope the last four are Hosea, Jamie, Stefan, and Fabio.

Carla and Leah need to GTFO.

[schild]

Haha wow. Carla wins and those 3 are on the bottom. I think Top Chef just punk'd me.

[Signe]

Jamie and Fabio are a toss up for me, too.  I'm pretty sure that Stefan and Hosea will be there at bitter, bitter end, though.

Speaking of restaurant wars.  I watched the first two episodes of this season's Brit series, The Restaurant.  It's all a bit sad.  Raymond Blanc is much too nice and tells sweet sad stories in a heavy French accent.  He has nearly no personality at all, but he's a dear.  The contestants mostly creep me out.

[AngryGumball]

I would just like to request that someone purchase me a Team Fabio shirt. I will buy the koolaid all day long.

Please chef do not put acid on that cheese, loved that line.

Its great to see Fabio lie thru his teeth full on about warm cabbage turning his venison from medium rare to beyond well done.

[schild]

Its great to see Fabio lie thru his teeth full on about warm cabbage turning his venison from medium rare to beyond well done.

The picture they showed of the meat when it was served did not look entirely overcooked. Of course, Jeff was the right one of the 3 to pick to go, but really, that whole cast should go.