Caller ID Etiquette

[WayAbvPar]

The reason I ask- I am like 3rd or 4th in line to cover the main business line when it rings (it starts with the receptionist, and eventually rings to my desk if the other folks between her and I don't answer). I probably field 10-15 calls a day. Pretty much every day, I get a call from someone who sees our number on their caller ID (when calling from any internal extension, caller ID is given the front desk line only, not the direct line to the extension that actually placed the call). Invariably, they choose option 2. I always answer the phone with the name of our company, but the first question? "Who's this?" Hey asshole- you called ME. Why not tell ME who YOU are? After I repeat the name of the company, then they tell me that someone called them (still- no mention of who they might be). After I explain to them that there are ~80 people who made the call, they indignantly end the call.

Seriously- WTF? If I see a strange number on my phone from a missed call, I check to see if there is a voice mail. If not, guess what I do? I fucking IGNORE it. It is obviously a wrong number or something completely unimportant.


Another pet peeve- Shitweasel coldcalling fucktards who call and ask for someone who hasn't worked here for 5 years. Added bonus when they can't even pronounce the person's fucking name (we have several Indian employees). When I explain that the person no longer works there, they ask to speak to his/her replacement. When I ask (knowing that it is a time wasting cold call) what the call is in reference to, they ask again to speak to the replacement (or ask for "Head Engineer", or "Sales Manager"). 9 times out of 10 I get them to break down and tell me that they want to send us a free trade magazine subscription, and just need some current information...

Were I at home, I would just hang up, usually while growling a few profanities. At work, I have to politely decline, and THEN hang up. Fucking soulless telemarketing fuckfaces. Go beg for money at an offramp if you are that hard up- there is more dignity in that than cold calling people all fucking day long and then being an evasive cockholster when pressed for details because you know deep down that you are a pus-filled cyst on the ass of society. Please kill yourselves kthx.

[stray]

It has always been some telemarketer when the caller id was private, so I don't answer at all anymore.

[kaid]

If you want a quick easy way to ditch a cold caller basically say that sorry sir that person is on another line but I can transfer you to their voice mail. Cold callers generally won't bother and will just say they will call back another time.

Our office has a specific voice mail box for the few hardy cold callers willing to go to voice mail. That voice mail box just auto deletes everything every couple days hehe our version of vmail /dev/null.

Oh I forgot to add that is for work. At home if I don't know your number then I will either moo at you or ask you if you want to take a bath either usually works to get telemarketers to hang up fast.


kaid

[Merusk]

I don't get calls at home.  The combination of the Federal 'do not call' list + an unlisted phone number is a wonderful thing.

At work I've gotten calls for the guy who used to have my number.  (Although it's been about a year since the last one.)  It's usually bill collectors who are surprised to hear that good ol' Rich no longer works here.  It's even better when you explain he hasn't worked there in 2-3 years.  I hope I've caused him all kinds of grief.

[Ookii]

I have nothing constructive to add to this thread so I Google Image Searched 'Caller ID' and found this:

[Azaroth]

The concept of telephones angers and confuses me.

If it's so important, why not just drive down to their house and speak to them in person?

[Hutch]

At work I pick up any call that doesn't get picked up by the boss(es) within the first couple or three rings. Sometimes a client will call us and the caller ID will say "no caller id found" or whatever, so we have to jump on everything.

Under these circumstances, I get very few telemarketers, and they always want to talk to the "head of IT" or the "head of sales" or "head of finance". I chuckle to myself (we're a 15 person company) and then ask if they'd like to go into voicemail, and they always say they'll call back.

At home, different story. I ignore every call that comes up "Private" or "Unavailable" or "Toll Free Call" or "<state_name> call". Those are all telemarketers. I also ignore real-looking local phone numbers that I don't recognize. If I've made a mistake in ignoring these calls, that's what voice mail is for.

I love caller ID.

[HaemishM]

If I don't recognize your number, the phone does not get picked up. If you can't leave a voicemail, fuck off.

[Sky]

I don't have caller ID, I usually screen calls. Anyone who knows me knows I screen calls, it's actually a fun game.

When I'm expecting a call, I answer with a loud "MROWR!". Again, anyone who knows me understands.

I'm on the no-call list, but I still get 'em. One guy called, I answered as a cat and he just went into his spiel, oblivious. Then he stopped and said..."excuse me?" I repeated "MROWR." He hung up. Another time I had a guy trying to get money for some charity (I give money to unsolicited charity). I spent about a half an hour trying to convince him he needed to donate money to me because of the housing crisis, he stayed on because he was sure I was going to donate to them. Finally he realized I was serious and got pissed and hung up. I like to have fun with telemarketers, they're bored.

[rattran]

I can't get the phone company here to turn on callerID, so I just screen calls. With an answering machine message that's usually short, and confusing to people.

You can't talk to the machine, I don't need to talk to you. And I give out my cellphone number infrequently, so numbers I don't recognize are invariably wrong number. Who I string along if bored.
"Sorry, Shirley/Bob/Taniqua can't come to the phone right now, we're having sex." then hang up. A surprising number then call back immediately and start screaming at me.

[Paelos]

Anything that comes up as "Unknown" on my cell phone gets heartily ignored. If they leave a message, which sometimes happens because of international calls from friends or family (rarely), then I call back immediately.

I used to get tons of calls about my car warranty expiring for some reason. My car is a 97 Mustang. Why the hell would I be worried about a warranty? She's almost 11 and worth probably $5,000 according to Blue Book with the mileage I have on it. They are always automated, too. Why haven't we made automatic phone calls with messages illegal? Isn't that just as bad as email spam?

[Sky]

We get an automated one from a credit company, dodgy one about lowering rates and how important it is I call them. I'm almost tempted to report them, but we turned that into a joke, too. My fiancee is always "Who is Heather? Why does she keep calling you and leaving messages? Why don't you love me!?! WHY DO YOU LOVE A ROBOT?!?"

[WayAbvPar]

Why haven't we made automatic phone calls with messages illegal? Isn't that just as bad as email spam?

Amen. I am not sure a company could insure I will never deal with them faster than by making me 'wait for the next associate'. WTF? You fucking called ME. That implies that whatever horseshit you are trying to shovel is poised and ready. Now I am supposed to sit here with my thumb in my ass until your 'associate' graces me with his or her presence?

[HaemishM]

Automated robot calls of any kind telling me to wait for some important information are insane. If it's so fucking important, WHY DID YOU SEND A ROBOT? You know those fuckers are just going to kill the humans and fuck my toaster.

Never send a robot to do a telemarketer's job.

[rk47]

I never checked my voice mail I think. I never checked it or used voice mail in my life time I think.

[Lantyssa]

To be fair, it's a cute toaster.

[Morfiend]

I think it depends on what type of a mood I am in. But since I only have a cell phone, with no landline, I tend to not miss very many calls. Also, since its a cell, I dont get may telemarketers. If I do miss a call, generally I go with option 1, I call back and say "Hello, some one just tried to call me from this number".

[Azaroth]

If I don't recognize your number, the phone does not get picked up. If you can't leave a voicemail, fuck off.

Basically, this. Probably more swearing.

[Big Gulp]

If I call people on my Skype phone they'll usually answer either hesitantly or angrily, because apparently my phone number shows up as (000) 000-0000.  I need to start telling people I'm Agent Smith from the NSA.

[Azaroth]

If I call people on my Skype phone they'll usually answer either hesitantly or angrily, because apparently my phone number shows up as (000) 000-0000.  I need to start telling people I'm Agent Smith from the NSA.

That'd be sweet.

[Selby]

I don't ever answer the phone.  Even if it is someone I know, chances are I don't want to talk to them anyway.  If there is a voicemail after the call and it is pertinent, I will call back but that almost never happens.

[Righ]

I do a general search for the number on the Internet which may show up abusive callers, and if it doesn't hit anything obvious, I use a reverse telephone directory. If there is no public record of the subscriber, I use LNP tools to find the provider that the number is ported to and register a complaint. Some useful places you might want to know about when dealing with shitty ass CLECs and their phone spamming customers:

http://telcodata.us
http://www.fonefinder.net
http://www.nationalpooling.com

I can't give you the other stuff I use because it requires subscriptions that you won't get if you're not working for a telco. But that stuff above is good enough to find somebody who can deal with abusive calls.

[schild]

Why did 50 people vote for Ignore it? LIARS!

[Abagadro]

The best thing about Caller ID and these new fangled phones is that I have programmed in a specific ring for my MIL so I don't even have to  look at the damn phone.

[Tebonas]

I call back and ask. Because I never had a telemarketer call me yet. Once one does, I'll go for the ignore option I guess.

[Merusk]

Why did 50 people vote for Ignore it? LIARS!

Well, probably because the question posed is different from the scenario Way laid-out.  I ignore missed calls of unrecognized numbers all the time. As others have stated, that's why I have voicemail.

[Bunk]

The whole ignoring unidentified callers thing is a real pain in the ass for my comnpany. We call out to new clients to help them setup thier software, they ignore our calls, and then they call back two months later pissed off that no one called them...

[Signe]

I ignore.  I always assume Righ has already looked it up and reported them to someone for something. 

[Grimwell]

I pretty much hate talking on the phone, so I ignore everything I don't recognize. I'm in that "If you can't leave a message I could give a f*** who you are." boat.

Selby is indeed worse. I can verify that his wife will at least answer and hand the phone to him if you call her. :P

[Signe]

So you're saying we should call Selby's wife?

[Selby]

She's the only one who ever answers the phone around here...

[Lantyssa]

Given the poll totals, I think we all need to forward our phones to Selby's place.

[Samwise]

Selby's phone policy is similar to mine.  Except that I also don't like listening to voicemail, so I never activated it on my current cel phone.  And I leave the phone turned off most of the time.

If you want to leave me a message, do it in writing, savages.  That way I can skim it if it's boring.

[Riggswolfe]

I ignore it. Hell, if I'm busy I'll ignore it no matter who it is. If it's an emergency call me 3 or 4 times at which point I'll answer with an annoyed "what?"

Unfortunately my fiance is genetically incapable of ignoring the phone. She will leap across the room to answer it no matter what we're doing: cooking, watching a movie, having sex, life-saving surgery or defusing a nuclear bomb. Then again, all the women in my family do the same thing so I think it might be something in the female genes that causes this annoying behavior.

[HaemishM]

She will leap across the room to answer it no matter what we're doing: ... having sex...

I think you're doing it wrong.