What the hell is a 'jackhob'?

[Johny Cee]

I love France.  I've spent a good portion of my life there on month-long holidays (which, sadly, become shorter when employment strikes).  The actual French people themselves are a mixed bag: I find Bretons, Provencal and other regional communities great, friendly and patient with foreigners who try to speak their language.  French people from Paris, however, are (as a very sweeping generalisation) second only to the Hungarians in terms of unfriendlness and wilful unwillingness to understand any but the best pronounced French (and my French is poor).

The great thing about being Scottish is this conversation, which happens everywhere (just with the French person speaking proper French):

Damnable Frenchie: "Vous êtes anglais.  Hmph."
Scot: "Mais non, je suis écossais."
DF: "Écossaise? Pourquoi n'avez-vous pas dit avant?  J'aime beaucoup les écossais.  Baisez vous ma fille! Au secours!  C'est les Allemands!  Sauve-nous s’il vous plaît!"

Well,  the Scottish were on the French side during the Hundred Years War, right?

[Rasix]

I loved Paris.  Parisians were nice enough, but my wife does speak decent French.  No one ever seemed to get put off at having to speak English when her French failed her.  Of course, we're not obnoxious, so that probably helped some.  Only rudeness I experienced were the cabbies, but most of them seemed to be immigrants that didn't speak much French or English.

Normandy was  very nice too.  The freshness of the food was amazing. 

But if I had to live anywhere in the world, it would be Paris.  I could never get tired of the sights, the art, and the food.  OHH GOD THE FOOD.  Staying 5 minutes from the "Best Falafel in Paris" didn't hurt. 

[Lantyssa]

Paris was the only part of my European trip I hated.  The people were horrible, the smell was worse, and they felt putting a bidet in the room was more important than a toilet (Or putting us in a room for people renting by the hour.  Either way it soured the experience).

[Samwise]

I visited Paris during massive striking, which significantly soured my experience.  No garbage pickups, no mail delivery, a bunch of museums closed, and most of the subways were running once an hour so if you managed to get one you were packed in with a thousand ripe-smelling Frenchmen.

[Phildo]

I was in Paris during the Tour De France once.  Half the city was closed down.

[Sky]

What's with the body odor thing, anyway? I don't get it, either way. People who stench of unwashed sweat or people who slather on perfume (man or woman).

I used to work unloading trucks for a living, a good clean sweat isn't a horrid thing, assuming you have good hygiene otherwise.

[Ironwood]

I love France.  I've spent a good portion of my life there on month-long holidays (which, sadly, become shorter when employment strikes).  The actual French people themselves are a mixed bag: I find Bretons, Provencal and other regional communities great, friendly and patient with foreigners who try to speak their language.  French people from Paris, however, are (as a very sweeping generalisation) second only to the Hungarians in terms of unfriendlness and wilful unwillingness to understand any but the best pronounced French (and my French is poor).

The great thing about being Scottish is this conversation, which happens everywhere (just with the French person speaking proper French):

Damnable Frenchie: "Vous êtes anglais.  Hmph."
Scot: "Mais non, je suis écossais."
DF: "Écossaise? Pourquoi n'avez-vous pas dit avant?  J'aime beaucoup les écossais.  Baisez vous ma fille! Au secours!  C'est les Allemands!  Sauve-nous s’il vous plaît!"

Well,  the Scottish were on the French side during the Hundred Years War, right?

No.  Without even looking it up or caring, I can tell you we were on the Scottish Side.

[Phildo]

The Scottish did side against the reigning English monarchs during the Jacobite rebellion, though.

[IainC]

The Scottish did side against the reigning English monarchs during the Jacobite rebellion, though.

And against the Scottish at Bannockburn - there were more Scots in Edward's army than there were fighting alongside William Wallace.

[Baldrake]

The Scottish did side against the reigning English monarchs during the Jacobite rebellion, though.

And against the Scottish at Bannockburn - there were more Scots in Edward's army than there were fighting alongside William Wallace.

There were in fact no Scots at all fighting alongside William Wallace at Bannockburn.

(This might be related to the fact that he had been dead the better part of a decade at the time.)

 

[stray]

Speaking of which, are there any of film treatments of Edward or Robert the Bruce? They make everyone but Wallace look like a piece of shit in Braveheart.. I've always wondered if there were more accurate depictions elsewhere.

[Selby]

They make everyone but Wallace look like a piece of shit in Braveheart..

Because everyone was a piece of shit at the time.  Always playing the other sides to try and get the best deal for themself possible.

I think part of the trouble is that happened quite some time ago and the records aren't the most stellar, making accurate interpretations quite difficult (and probably boring compared to a blockbuster movie).

[Lantyssa]

I want to know more about the governor who started the whole thing.

[Strazos]

I spent a few days in Paris a few years ago during a trip. People were nice enough to me. Especially when we went for breakfast, and Then realized that my pseudo-French was Pure Epic Fail.

I think the French/Parisians, just like most sensible people anywhere, appreciate the effort and are understanding if you're not great with the language of the area. Especially if you're not an imperious dick about it.

[schild]

Last time I went to Paris was 1998.

Bunch of assholes in the city. Everyone else in the french countryside were the nicest people I'd ever met.

Still, far prefer Italy to France. For the food, the women, and the culture.

Also, Paris was dirty - like worse than New York Dirty.

[Strazos]

Rome was dirtier when I was there. As well as Florence and Venice.

But food culture and women? Yeah, Italy still wins.

[IainC]

The Scottish did side against the reigning English monarchs during the Jacobite rebellion, though.

And against the Scottish at Bannockburn - there were more Scots in Edward's army than there were fighting alongside William Wallace.

There were in fact no Scots at all fighting alongside William Wallace at Bannockburn.

(This might be related to the fact that he had been dead the better part of a decade at the time.)

 

Yeah, you're right and as soon as I saw your post I realised I'd fucked up. I was originally going to post 'alongside the Bruce' but I figured the reference might be too obscure for most. Braveheart may have been a travesty of epic proportions as far as historical accuracy and bias is concerned but it did at least bring the subject matter to the popular consciousness.

[stray]

Braveheart still rocks just as a heroic epic though. Despite Gibson kind of going off the deep end since, and despite it being inaccurate, it hasn't been topped.

[Endie]

I enjoyed Braveheart, despite the fact that almost every incident portrayed in it is fictional.  That said, I find it so poignant that I only ever watched it once, on release.

I do bridle about people romanticising Wallace and harshly criticising the Bruce.  The fact is that Wallace lost in the end.  Scotland needed a gritty, realistic winner, and that is what the Bruce gave us: a man with a solid grasp of guerilla warfare and the patience to grind down an enemy, as well as the ability as a general to do what was supposedly impossible at the time: take a peasant army with pretty much no heavy cavalry whatsoever and use it to defeat a numerically superior feudal host blessed with Welsh longbowmen.  It's actually typically Scottish to then spend the next seven hundred years saying "Aye, Bruce was fine enough in his way but he was no Wallace.   Ach, you can't lead a schiltrom into a pub round here without trampling all over half a dozen successful, charismatic military leaders..."

[DraconianOne]

The irony being that the Bruce was of French descent!

[Signe]

Didn't we have this conversation when the stupid film came out?  Always with the déjà vu around here.  Anyway, is he or isn't he (whoever he is) a jackhob?

[Ironwood]

We did.  But we have the Freedom to bring the subject up again.

You'll never take our Freedom.

And whatnot.

[Signe]

We did.  But we have the Freedom to bring the subject up again.

You'll never take our Freedom.

And whatnot.

Yea.  Like all the other times.  Let's change the subject.

Hey!  What about those Irish?

[stray]

I liked that Michael Collins movie.

[Tebonas]

Yeah, what about the Irish?

You can all keep your love for all things french, if I ever get tired of my own country, Ireland will be the place to move for me. Green hills, friendly locals and good broadband connections all around. While you wade knee deep in the filth of Paris I will enjoy playing Mass Effect 7 in Connemara.

[IainC]

Yeah, what about the Irish?

You can all keep your love for all things french, if I ever get tired of my own country, Ireland will be the place to move for me. Green hills, friendly locals and good broadband connections all around. While you wade knee deep in the filth of Paris I will enjoy playing Mass Effect 7 in Connemara.

I moved to Dublin from Paris in the middle of last year. I live in one of the nice bits of Dublin (Castleknock) and I can guarantee that Dublin is 10,000% dirtier than Paris is.

Also Ireland has very green hills. Want to know why?

Because it rains all the goddamn time. The day we moved here it was a lovely June day. Temperatures around 28 or so (82 for those of you living in Myanmar, Liberia or the US). Then it rained for 63 days straight. I kid you not.

Oh and good broadband?
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (sorry*)
Ireland did indeed used to have a world class domestic infrastructure. Then they stopped upgrading or maintaining it for 6 years. I have a friend who is a telecoms manager here, he's very dull to listen to because he bangs on about it constantly.





*not really

[Tebonas]

Well, thats on the other side of Ireland. I too realized that From Limerick on Eastwards the cities we stayed in were as dirty as you can find them.

But I absolutely adored Galway (for my bigger city needs) and Clifden. The best bike tour I ever had was biking directly into the ocean from the Sky road.

And I don't mind it raining when it stops during the day long enough to do my outdoor bits before retreating behind my computer again. Makes for better air during the tour.

But I have all of that here as well (apart from the ocean), so I won't be moving soon anyway. But Paris? No ten horses could get me there.

[Signe]

You should never live on the other side of anything.  It's very nearly almost always awful.

[Tebonas]

Too late! We all live at the other side of something.

[HaemishM]

Speaking of which, are there any of film treatments of Edward or Robert the Bruce? They make everyone but Wallace look like a piece of shit in Braveheart.. I've always wondered if there were more accurate depictions elsewhere.

Everything I've read suggests they were all complete bastards, including Wallace. Braveheart tarted him up quite a bit, but he was a brutal with the sacking, raping and pillaging as any English king.

EDIT: Also, Robert the Bruce was no "noble" figure. He was a right cunt as well. He killed his chief rival to the throne in a church. I don't mean had a Highlander duel, I mean he and two other cunts murdered the fucker. That's the great thing about Medieval romanticism, it's such a myth. It was as brutal as it can get.

[Sky]

Then it rained for 63 days straight. I kid you not.

You say that like it's a bad thing. You should move to the arid sunny hell half these jackhobs habitate.

I'd love to move to Ireland, wonder if I could land a job there now that I'm a mactard. Isn't there some rule about foreigners not being able to buy land, though? Be tough on retirement to have to pay rent forever.

[Der Helm]

Ach, you can't

Is that a real word or sound  ? If yes, what for ?

[Arthur_Parker]

I never liked Dublin, the first time I went as a kid, it was closed.  I don't see what the big attraction is about Paris, it just struck me as being like a posh version of Bradford.

[Simond]

Ach, you can't

Is that a real word or sound  ? If yes, what for ?

In English? No.
In Scots? Yes.

[voodoolily]

It's a real word in German, too, isn't it?