Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
August 02, 2025, 09:58:00 AM

Login with username, password and session length

Search:     Advanced search
we're back, baby
*
Home Help Search Login Register
f13.net  |  f13.net General Forums  |  General Discussion  |  Serious Business  |  Topic: Next time I'm in Scotland 0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.
Pages: [1] Go Down Print
Author Topic: Next time I'm in Scotland  (Read 2990 times)
Murgos
Terracotta Army
Posts: 7474


on: November 07, 2007, 06:25:13 AM

I am sooo knocking on Ironwoods door and using his loo.

Quote
5. In Scotland, if someone knocks on your door and requires the use of your toilet, you must let them enter.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20071106/od_afp/britainlawsoffbeat

Also, if I were Scottish I would stay the hell away from York.  I imagine this hoodlums there just leave archery equipment lying around in the off chance a Scotsman has to pick them up, like because they are blocking his doorway or are piled on top of him.

"You have all recieved youre last warning. I am in the process of currently tracking all of youre ips and pinging your home adressess. you should not have commencemed a war with me" - Aaron Rayburn
Righ
Terracotta Army
Posts: 6542

Teaching the world Google-fu one broken dream at a time.


Reply #1 on: November 07, 2007, 11:28:12 AM

Somebody give him the address of the neighbour's house and we'll have Ironwood record the incident on a camcorder.

The camera adds a thousand barrels. - Steven Colbert
Lantyssa
Terracotta Army
Posts: 20848


Reply #2 on: November 07, 2007, 11:30:45 AM

I'm sensing a business opportunity: In Liverpool, it is illegal for a woman to be topless except as a clerk in a tropical fish store.

Hahahaha!  I'm really good at this!
Murgos
Terracotta Army
Posts: 7474


Reply #3 on: November 07, 2007, 01:17:27 PM

I'm sensing a business opportunity: In Liverpool, it is illegal for a woman to be topless except as a clerk in a tropical fish store.

See, that one kind of makes sense.  I mean, you don't want the poor girl to ruin her blouse every time she has to reach into the tank to get a fish.  I gotta say though, watching a topless young woman go head first into a giant aquarium tank to try and catch that clown fish I want, the one with the spot, no wait, that one over there with the big stripe, etc..., would be well worth the $2.50 spent for the fish.

"You have all recieved youre last warning. I am in the process of currently tracking all of youre ips and pinging your home adressess. you should not have commencemed a war with me" - Aaron Rayburn
Margalis
Terracotta Army
Posts: 12335


Reply #4 on: November 07, 2007, 05:25:38 PM

That's why Lantyssa would charge a $10 cover.

vampirehipi23: I would enjoy a book written by a monkey and turned into a movie rather than this.
Paelos
Contributor
Posts: 27075

Error 404: Title not found.


Reply #5 on: November 07, 2007, 09:48:27 PM

See, I've always thought she'd have a pet store with small red mammals. Can she do that topless?  awesome, for real

CPA, CFO, Sports Fan, Game when I have the time
Ironwood
Terracotta Army
Posts: 28240


Reply #6 on: November 08, 2007, 01:55:06 PM

I am sooo knocking on Ironwoods door and using his loo.

Quote
5. In Scotland, if someone knocks on your door and requires the use of your toilet, you must let them enter.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20071106/od_afp/britainlawsoffbeat

Also, if I were Scottish I would stay the hell away from York.  I imagine this hoodlums there just leave archery equipment lying around in the off chance a Scotsman has to pick them up, like because they are blocking his doorway or are piled on top of him.


Ok.

.
.
.

It doesn't say anything about LEAVING the house.

.
.
.

Just sayin'

"Mr Soft Owl has Seen Some Shit." - Sun Tzu
Ironwood
Terracotta Army
Posts: 28240


Reply #7 on: November 08, 2007, 01:58:41 PM

Also, while we're on the subject, I always wanted a Knighthood.

Apparently, once you've been Knighted, it's legal to carry around a longsword at all times in the UK.

Again, though, it doesn't say anything about the Met NOT shooting you in the head seven times.

"Mr Soft Owl has Seen Some Shit." - Sun Tzu
Endie
Terracotta Army
Posts: 6436


WWW
Reply #8 on: November 08, 2007, 03:26:08 PM

Call me Mr Pedant, but a lot of those simply aren't true: the legislation has not been specifically revoked, but it lies dead on the statute book since it is overridden by later legislation.  Those who wish to murder Scottish archery enthusiasts in York are welcome to try (I have a few candidates in mind: George Galloway would be a good start) but you'll find your pleas of legal backing falling on deaf ears.

My blog: http://endie.net

Twitter - Endieposts

"What else would one expect of Scottish sociopaths sipping their single malt Glenlivit [sic]?" Jack Thompson
Polysorbate80
Terracotta Army
Posts: 2044


Reply #9 on: November 08, 2007, 04:56:13 PM

Quote
A pregnant woman can legally relieve herself anywhere she wants, including in a policeman's helmet

This one actually seems pretty reasonable to me.  Interfering with a hormonally unbalanced pregnant woman's near-constant need to pee does not seem a smart thing to do, IMO.

(Yes, my wife is expecting again.  If anyone needs me, I'll be down in my bunker.)

“Why the fuck would you ... ?” is like 80% of the conversation with Poly — Chimpy
Signe
Terracotta Army
Posts: 18942

Muse.


Reply #10 on: November 08, 2007, 05:52:30 PM

Quote
A pregnant woman can legally relieve herself anywhere she wants, including in a policeman's helmet

This one actually seems pretty reasonable to me.  Interfering with a hormonally unbalanced pregnant woman's near-constant need to pee does not seem a smart thing to do, IMO.

(Yes, my wife is expecting again.  If anyone needs me, I'll be down in my bunker.)

Hey!  Congrats! 

My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
Ironwood
Terracotta Army
Posts: 28240


Reply #11 on: November 09, 2007, 02:38:05 AM

Where does she get those wonderful toys ?

"Mr Soft Owl has Seen Some Shit." - Sun Tzu
DraconianOne
Terracotta Army
Posts: 2905


Reply #12 on: November 09, 2007, 03:41:03 AM

Interfering with a hormonally unbalanced pregnant woman's near-constant need to pee does not seem a smart thing to do, IMO.

I found that referring to them as hormonally unbalanced can lead to the promise of a kitchen knife embedded in my gut.  Next time, I'll try it out of their earshot.

(Yes, my wife is expecting again.  If anyone needs me, I'll be down in my bunker.)

Congratulations.  Mine is too - I'll join you in your bunker with a crate of beer.

A point can be MOOT. MUTE is more along the lines of what you should be. - WayAbvPar
Polysorbate80
Terracotta Army
Posts: 2044


Reply #13 on: November 09, 2007, 08:40:58 AM

Congratulations.  Mine is too - I'll join you in your bunker with a crate of beer.

Thanks :)

We can send out for blackjack and hookers.

“Why the fuck would you ... ?” is like 80% of the conversation with Poly — Chimpy
cmlancas
Terracotta Army
Posts: 2511


Reply #14 on: November 14, 2007, 05:08:43 AM

Well played Futurama quote, sir.  awesome, for real

f13 Street Cred of the week:
I can't promise anything other than trauma and tragedy. -- schild
Pages: [1] Go Up Print 
f13.net  |  f13.net General Forums  |  General Discussion  |  Serious Business  |  Topic: Next time I'm in Scotland  
Jump to:  

Powered by SMF 1.1.10 | SMF © 2006-2009, Simple Machines LLC