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Topic: Girls like guys with skills! (Read 7379 times)
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Broughden
Terracotta Army
Posts: 3232
I put the 'shill' in 'cockmonkey'.
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....especially samurai sword skills. Nerds rejoice world wide. Tell their moms, "See mom? THATS why I bought a samurai sword!" Police: College student kills intruder with sword
By BEN NUCKOLS (AP) – 18 minutes ago
BALTIMORE — A Johns Hopkins University student armed with a samurai sword killed an intruder in his garage, Baltimore police said Tuesday.
Two laptops and a Sony PlayStation had been stolen by burglars Monday from the home, on University Parkway just blocks from the school, said police spokesman Anthony Guglielmi. Early Tuesday, one of the four Hopkins students who live in the home noticed the garage door was open and took a sword with him to investigate, Guglielmi said.
In the garage, the student told police he discovered a man and when the student told the man to get out, the man accosted him, Guglielmi said. The student defended himself with the sword, cutting off the man's hand and causing a severe laceration to his upper body, he said.
Campus security and an off-duty city officer responding to a call for a suspicious person in the area around 1:20 a.m. Tuesday heard screams to call police, Guglielmi said. The man died at the scene, but police are not yet releasing his name, he said.
Michael Hughes, 43, who lives two doors down from the house where the slaying occurred, said he was getting ready for bed at around 1:30 a.m. when he heard screams from the rear of the home.
"There was fear in the voice. I could tell someone was scared," Hughes said.
Three young men were sitting on the front porch of the home around 9:30 a.m. Tuesday. A police officer was standing in the doorway, and a single police car was parked nearby.
The men refused to comment when approached by an Associated Press reporter.
Behind the three-story brick rowhouse, a wooden fence was broken. There was a pool of blood in the brick courtyard between the back porch and the garage.
Guglielmi said the man had been arrested on charges such as burglary several times before, and had been released Saturday from a Baltimore County jail.
Police are interviewing the student and his roommates, and are talking to prosecutors about whether to file charges. http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5i_yk3DgiZ_JmZl1SSrXRbdqjZN9QD9ANQU5O0
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The wave of the Reagan coalition has shattered on the rocky shore of Bush's incompetence. - Abagadro
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Cyrrex
Terracotta Army
Posts: 10603
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That is hardcore.
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"...maybe if you cleaned the piss out of the sunny d bottles under your desks and returned em, you could upgrade you vid cards, fucken lusers.." - Grunk
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Sky
Terracotta Army
Posts: 32117
I love my TV an' hug my TV an' call it 'George'.
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Chopped off his hand!
Must be an Egyptian.
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Brogarn
Terracotta Army
Posts: 1372
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Nice.
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01101010
Terracotta Army
Posts: 12007
You call it an accident. I call it justice.
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God damn ninjas everywhere.
Though, thinking about it... talk about your life-long epic stories you can tell your grandkids.
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Does any one know where the love of God goes...When the waves turn the minutes to hours? -G. Lightfoot
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Mrbloodworth
Terracotta Army
Posts: 15148
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It bet the cut was a complete accident. The sword just went wild when the guy curled up. 
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Cyrrex
Terracotta Army
Posts: 10603
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If the hand was actually severed, that is no accident. That takes a lot of force.
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"...maybe if you cleaned the piss out of the sunny d bottles under your desks and returned em, you could upgrade you vid cards, fucken lusers.." - Grunk
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gryeyes
Terracotta Army
Posts: 2215
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So awesome,guy got his laptop and playstation jacked and was prepared with ninja skills. Thinking the guy raised his arm to block and the sword cut his hand off and still went into his chest?
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Hawkbit
Terracotta Army
Posts: 5531
Like a Klansman in the ghetto.
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I love our system. The kid defends himself and they're considering pressing charges. If you enter my home with the intent to do harm to me or my things, all bets are off. Thieves are given too much leeway in our legal system.
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stray
Terracotta Army
Posts: 16818
has an iMac.
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That is hardcore.
Seriously.. Although to be a nerd about it, I'd rather use a proper ninja sword in this situation. If this was indoors (even a garage), it was probably a clumsy chop.
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Cyrrex
Terracotta Army
Posts: 10603
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Again, I don't think it could have been too clumsy. Those things can be sharp, but some serious force is going to be required to lop off a hand. At least, that's the story he needs to be retelling his grandchildren.
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"...maybe if you cleaned the piss out of the sunny d bottles under your desks and returned em, you could upgrade you vid cards, fucken lusers.." - Grunk
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stray
Terracotta Army
Posts: 16818
has an iMac.
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I agree with you there.. Actually, I have some experience with "hand cutting"  It does take quite a bit of force. I had an accident with a meat cleaver once, and only broke the top layers of skin. I'm sure his sword was much sharper than that cleaver, but probably still required a good swing to pull that off. It just seems like a samurai sword is a little big for a garage. But without seeing the crime scene, it's hard to tell. Not really important either.. Because it's fucking hardcore like you said.
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HaemishM
Staff Emeritus
Posts: 42666
the Confederate flag underneath the stone in my class ring
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Motherfucker chopped off a dude's hand with a sword. I'd wager he could be paraplegic neckbeard and just that act alone would make him more hardcore than most here.
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Cyrrex
Terracotta Army
Posts: 10603
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It's also entirely possible that it was either a Ninja sword (ninja-to?) or the shoto version of the samurai sword (wakizashi?), either of which would have been easier to wield in a confined space. It also depends greatly on how well built it was, obviously. The teenager in me who dreamed of this exact scenario simply must know!
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"...maybe if you cleaned the piss out of the sunny d bottles under your desks and returned em, you could upgrade you vid cards, fucken lusers.." - Grunk
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Lantyssa
Terracotta Army
Posts: 20848
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A wakazashi would be difficult to get enough force behind for severing a limb. It wasn't necessarily an over-head slice, though if it was a garage living-space, it's entirely possible there was enough room.
It also only said the man was in the garage when the man went after him. He might have been standing outside. (Thus the pool of blood between the porch and the garage.)
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Hahahaha! I'm really good at this!
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Nevermore
Terracotta Army
Posts: 4740
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Again, I don't think it could have been too clumsy. Those things can be sharp, but some serious force is going to be required to lop off a hand. At least, that's the story he needs to be retelling his grandchildren.
Not if it was a Hanzo sword.
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Over and out.
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01101010
Terracotta Army
Posts: 12007
You call it an accident. I call it justice.
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I love our system. The kid defends himself and they're considering pressing charges. If you enter my home with the intent to do harm to me or my things, all bets are off. Thieves are given too much leeway in our legal system.
Fuck that. Use a sword and you get a pass - no pussy gun from 10ft. And I am guessing it was some sort of katana which should get you an "atta boy" from every person in the room.
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Does any one know where the love of God goes...When the waves turn the minutes to hours? -G. Lightfoot
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caladein
Terracotta Army
Posts: 3174
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This makes my day.
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« Last Edit: September 15, 2009, 05:26:41 PM by caladein »
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"Point being, they can't make everyone happy, so I hope they pick me." - Ingmar"OH MY GOD WE'RE SURROUNDED SEND FOR BACKUP DIG IN DEFENSIVE POSITIONS MAN YOUR NECKBEARDS" - tgr
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gryeyes
Terracotta Army
Posts: 2215
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If this kid chopped the guy after cutting his hand off hes probably gonna get fucked. Pretty hard to justify continuing to attack an unarmed man with a sword.
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Lantyssa
Terracotta Army
Posts: 20848
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A more full account I saw on an Austrialian site made it sound like he did one slash, which got the guy's hand and neck.
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Hahahaha! I'm really good at this!
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Khaldun
Terracotta Army
Posts: 15189
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I dunno, reading the thing:
a) it sounds to me like the upper body injuries were sustained in the cutting off of the hand b) I think maybe you get a pass on adrenaline if some fucker is coming at you in your house and you're trying to fight him off with a sword and you swing twice. Unless you're, like, a genuine ninja.
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Teleku
Terracotta Army
Posts: 10516
https://i.imgur.com/mcj5kz7.png
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A more full account I saw on an Austrialian site made it sound like he did one slash, which got the guy's hand and neck.
Sounds like the scene in pulp fiction where Bruce Willis comes back down the stairs with Katana.
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"My great-grandfather did not travel across four thousand miles of the Atlantic Ocean to see this nation overrun by immigrants. He did it because he killed a man back in Ireland. That's the rumor." -Stephen Colbert
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gryeyes
Terracotta Army
Posts: 2215
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a) it sounds to me like the upper body injuries were sustained in the cutting off of the hand Thats what I assumed as well,but you are not a novice if you can slice through a limb into the chest with enough force to kill. That creates the second problem,justifying killing an unarmed man when you are martially trained and armed. In many States that situation would not be legal grounds for lethal self defense.
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TheWalrus
Terracotta Army
Posts: 4321
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If this kid chopped the guy after cutting his hand off hes probably gonna get fucked. Pretty hard to justify continuing to attack an unarmed man with a sword.
You mean unhanded.
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vanilla folders - MediumHigh
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gryeyes
Terracotta Army
Posts: 2215
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Too obvious
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Nerf
Terracotta Army
Posts: 2421
The Presence of Your Vehicle Has Been Documented
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a) it sounds to me like the upper body injuries were sustained in the cutting off of the hand Thats what I assumed as well,but you are not a novice if you can slice through a limb into the chest with enough force to kill. That creates the second problem,justifying killing an unarmed man when you are martially trained and armed. In many States that situation would not be legal grounds for lethal self defense. I don't think martial training ever comes into play, 99% sure thats all just movie bullshit. On top of that, check out the mortality rates of different kinds of wounds. Knife wounds rank near the top, really big knives are going to be even worse. Unarmed or not, if you break into a house and lunge at someone, you're getting fucking put down by whatever means are at hand. This robber had a rap sheet longer than your arm, good riddance I say, they should give Mr. Samurai a fucking medal.
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gryeyes
Terracotta Army
Posts: 2215
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I agree but sadly it does not work out that way. I believe the "my hands are a lethal weapon" shit is bullshit. In some places you must avoid a confrontation at all costs for it be self defense. Meaning you cant go and confront the guy with a weapon if you can be shown to have the option to flee. Your level of training most certainly will be a factor in a prosecutors case,forced a confrontation in which you used lethal force on an unarmed man. You are also a fucking ninja wielding a sword and killed him with a single slice. Depending on the specifics its not out of the picture for him to be charged.
It plays a big role in substantiating a "reasonably fear for your life" part. Its not a special charge or anything.
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Khaldun
Terracotta Army
Posts: 15189
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I think you're out in advance of the known specifics here. Among other things people with sharp objects/knives/swords can do surprising damage to other people through sheer luck if they're panicked enough. They might not be able to reliably repeat that 9 times out of ten, but in a single incident, *anything* is possible.
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Righ
Terracotta Army
Posts: 6542
Teaching the world Google-fu one broken dream at a time.
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Google "sword attack glasgow". There's usually a few every year. The most exciting one recently cleaved a guy's skull half. Swords are easy - even a weedy runt can kill with them.
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The camera adds a thousand barrels. - Steven Colbert
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stray
Terracotta Army
Posts: 16818
has an iMac.
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I really doubt he had training. Not even the most dedicated martial artists know Kenjutsu in some kind of formal way. He just sounds like an enthusiast. Hell, I'm sure if he was trained, he would have just beat the shit out the robber with a bokken.
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Triforcer
Terracotta Army
Posts: 4663
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Its hilarious that you all are even remotely entertaining the possibility that this kid had some sort of training. Here is what happened: He fished his full-scale Frostmourne replica from the layer of Doritos and Doctor Pepper cans under his bed, and then swung it and got lucky.
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All life begins with Nu and ends with Nu. This is the truth! This is my belief! At least for now...
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stray
Terracotta Army
Posts: 16818
has an iMac.
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Frostmourne is a claymore. Crushing damage, yo.  Wait, I had to google it. Stabby, stabby probably. I don't even know.. Fantasy swords are ridiculous. It looks like a huge dagger.
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« Last Edit: September 16, 2009, 02:03:58 AM by stray »
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NiX
Wiki Admin
Posts: 7770
Locomotive Pandamonium
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If hes watched enough movies, he probably had the sword up above his head, which would explain how it caught the guys neck while cutting off his hand.
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