Why do people live in Australia?

[Big Gulp]

Just got done watching a show about ants on the Discovery Channel, and apparently Australia has a species of ant called the bulldog ant that grows up to an inch and a half, is highly aggressive, has gigantic mandibles and a wasp-like stinger.  Oh, and their sting has about a 3% chance of producing anaphylactic shock and possibly killing you.

Let's see...  Brown snakes, funnel web spiders, sharks of every description, crocs, and now giant hyper-aggressive killer ants.  Why would anyone live in this god forsaken hell-hole?  Seriously?  Love you people, but that entire continent just needs a fresh coat of napalm to kill off the nasty shit that infests it.

[eldaec]

They didn't choose to go there, they're all convicts.

[Calantus]

We're also running out of water on the east coast, the several year drought is causing all kinds of hell for farmers all over the country, and we're in the PAL region. Honestly I don't really know why we live here. Possibly because there's way too much land to not stick a whole lot of buildings on it just 'cause we can. And yeah, England didn't want us anymore because we stole their bread.


On the subject of bull ants those things are pretty nasty. We used to go to this park an hour or so from where I lived and us kids would sometimes just spend all day messing with them and freaking out when they got angry. From memory they sting quite a bit when they bite/sting if you were unlucky enough to be gotten by one.

[Riggswolfe]

Still sounds better than the South American ants that eat horses and shit.

[Signe]

I MIGHT be able to put up with so many poinsonous thingys, as long as they didn't get in the house, car or my shoes.  They also have some terribly cute animals that you can't find anywhere else.   I couldn't, however, put up with the time zone.  That would absolutely kill me.

[Cheddar]

I MIGHT be able to put up with so many poinsonous thingys, as long as they didn't get in the house, car or my shoes.  They also have some terribly cute animals that you can't find anywhere else.   I couldn't, however, put up with the time zone.  That would absolutely kill me.

You need to change your avatar back to boobies.

[Llava]

Seconded.


I'd actually like to visit Australia, it's on my list of countries I'd consider moving to.  But I'm staying the fuck away from the wild.  I'll cower in the cities, thank you very much.

[Sky]

Why do people live in California or Florida? I think you're all nuts. I laugh when people complain about the snow around here. I'll take snow over killer insect/reptiles/snakes, hurricanes, tornados, floods, earthquakes, riots, etc.

[Big Gulp]

Why do people live in California or Florida? I think you're all nuts. I laugh when people complain about the snow around here. I'll take snow over killer insect/reptiles/snakes, hurricanes, tornados, floods, earthquakes, riots, etc.

I've been thinking seriously about eventually moving to Hawaii a few years down the line.  Great weather, and as long as you build on high ground the tsunamis shouldn't be much of a problem.  Of course, the need to be lava-vigilant is there, but still, that sounds better than Michigan.

[pxib]

Australia's third world resource-based economy is unique among developed nations. It primarily exports commodities and raw materials and primarily imports manufactured goods rather than the other way round. That it has maintained a high standard of living is mostly a matter of high wages due to constant labor shortage because, as the thread title points out, nobody's in a hurry to move there. High wages inspire mechanization and modernization, like they have in western Europe and the USA, so it takes fewer people to do the same amount of work... and those people need to be supervisors and technicians rather than laborers, which requires a stable and effective education infrastructure.

Some of those skilled, educated first-world workers find that they're in demand in nicer places and leave the country.

On the positive side, unemployment can only be a threat when there are more people than jobs, so Australia has rates down around 2-3% on its northern and western shores and only reaches highs of 4% in the east. Speaking of which.. it's important to note that when Calanthus says "running out of water on the east coast" we non-Austrialians understand he means "running out of water in the only part of the continent which ever had much worth drinking anyway". As unattractive as Big Gulp might find Melbourne, I'll bet he'd find it a lot nicer than Darwin.

So why move to Australia? Cost of living is low, standard of living is high, and it's easy to find a job.

[Samwise]

What about drop bears?

[pxib]

Marsupials Of Unusual Size? I don't believe they exist.

[Trippy]

Your comments about bulldog ants reminded my of this Dave Berry article from a few years back about the fire ants in Florida whose stings can also cause people to go into anaphylactic shock.

[Murgos]

What about drop bears?

They inhabit four-ecks which I think is a slightly less inebriated country.

[Big Gulp]

They also have some terribly cute animals that you can't find anywhere else.

Sorry, but every poisonous snake, insect, and aquatic death machine cancels out 10 cuddly, cute animals.  Imagine this; I bring you a basket of koala bears, wombats, and baby kangaroos and tell you, "Cuddle all you want, they love people!  Oh, but somewhere in the basket is an agressive brown snake that is coiled and ready to strike.  Have fun.".  Now, granted, those cuddly creatures are great, but their charm doesn't make up for the fact that there is apparently a critter every square foot in Australia that will kill you dead.  Shit, even the sting rays are taking out their wrath nowadays.

Nope, we've got to destroy Australia (and hell, throw in NZ for good measure.  We'll lose what, 10 sheep or so?) to prevent it's evil from spreading to the rest of the world.

[Calantus]

One thing I've always wanted to laugh at an American for, but always forget, is the big deal you guys seemingly make out of black widow spiders (we call them red back spiders). They're just spiders you can find in any old shed. I used to always hear about "black widow" this and "black widow" that on TV and I always thought it must be this huge black spider with massive fangs. When I found out what it was I was very disappointed in you all.

[Tebonas]

I don't see the problem. You just don't fuck with nature in Australia or nature fucks you back. Fair enough for me. Bu then I'm not that much of an outdoor person. If they manage to keep my bicyle courses poisonous-death-free they can kill off and feed on all the hikers and hunters they can find.

[Llava]

Pictures

Like living in Hawaii, but with fewer tourists, more room, less lava, and much more reasonable living costs.  In exchange, you just don't fuck around in places where people don't belong.  I can handle that.

Still wanna visit, still considering moving there eventually.

[Selby]

Doesn't Australia have some pretty strict requirements for coming to their country to set up a residence?  This project manager where I work spent more than a year preparing to actually move there with his wife.

[eldaec]

Doesn't Australia have some pretty strict requirements for coming to their country to set up a residence?  This project manager where I work spent more than a year preparing to actually move there with his wife.

If you're under 30, speak English, and have professional qualifications of almost any sort, then not really. Aged 30-45, and you'll need to be on their 'in demand' profession list - which is quite a long list.

http://www.immi.gov.au/skilled/general-skilled-migration/136/eligibility-applicant.htm

[squirrel]

My Father lives in Noosa Heads (Queensland, about 2 hrs north of Brisbane by car). I love it there but I do agree, as a North Amercian the number of things that can kill you in the wilderness is intimidating.

It's worth it though...

[bhodi]

A co-worker of mine wanted to immigrate there, but couldn't scrounge up enough 'points'. He's moving to NZ instead.

[Signe]

Years ago someone I knew tried but was rejected because his brother didn't meet the health requirements, even though he wasn't going.

Edited for erroneous letter removal.

[Roac]

Your comments about bulldog ants reminded my of this Dave Berry article from a few years back about the fire ants in Florida whose stings can also cause people to go into anaphylactic shock.

They're also here in SC.  There are several mounds in my yard I get to try and kill every summer.  While in middle school, I kneeled down to unlock my bike - with my knee going right into an ant hill.  Ate up most of my leg, got into my pants/shoe, etc.  They are not fun.  On the other hand, once you get used to looking for them, they're not much of a problem. 

[Calantus]

Fire ants? Yeah we got them too: http://www.abc.net.au/news/features/stories/s382049.htm :P

[Selby]

I grew up with fire ants.  I assume ALL ants bite now because of it.  Those little buggers will get all over you quick and bite you all the way down.

[lamaros]

Yeah Australia is way dangerous because we have ants and spiders. And snakes. I wake up each day thinking "if I happen to go out searching for as many dangerous native animals as I can find - and I'll probably have to get the car and drive for a few hours out into the country - and then eat/fight them all, then go hide under a log where no one can find me... well shit, I might die."

I suffer this every day. I think they call it "I'm american and I've never left the urban area I grew up in so I imagine the world is really different to what it actually is"-phobia.

I believe Australian is actually the/one of the most urbanized countries in the world. But hey. Those ants! Shit!

[Signe]

Just don't go in the middle bit. 

(the advert above is now one with a bunch of bugs on it.  I hate you guys)

[Llava]

I suffer this every day. I think they call it "I'm american and I've never left the urban area I grew up in so I imagine the world is really different to what it actually is"-phobia.

Okay, I agree with you that these guys are overestimating how dangerous Australia really is, but weren't you just lecturing me about high pedestals over in the Anna Nicole thread?

[Yegolev]

I hear Hawaii has a roach problem.

Maybe I need to get the Marion avatar back.

[Daeven]

One thing I've always wanted to laugh at an American for, but always forget, is the big deal you guys seemingly make out of black widow spiders (we call them red back spiders). They're just spiders you can find in any old shed. I used to always hear about "black widow" this and "black widow" that on TV and I always thought it must be this huge black spider with massive fangs. When I found out what it was I was very disappointed in you all.

Why? Would we still go out and invent smart-cluster-death-ray-bombs if it wasn't for or irrational fear of tiny little spiders? You Australians are all accepting of alien things that may potentially kill you. Americans? We believe in killing them. Twice. And then blowing up the crater.

[TardKommando]

They also have some terribly cute animals that you can't find anywhere else.

 (and hell, throw in NZ for good measure.  We'll lose what, 10 sheep or so?)

Err, about 50190284 sheep actually. And you won't even lose any poisonous snakes, spiders or bugs. Though I think we may have one kind of poisonous spider which no-one has seen for 20 years.

[Signe]

I'm all for keeping these countries, TardKommando.  After all, my favourite rugby team is from NZ and I have a very, very SMALL soft soft for cricket so we really do need Australia.  But you post isn't helping our cause any!   

[Murgos]

Everyone seem to be forgetting about the most dangerous of Australia's critters.  The roving bands of post-apocalyptic marauders.

I mean, I am all for fast cars and sawed off shotguns but I really don't want to have to fight off attacks on my way home after a hard day at work.  And besides?  Who can get laid wearing football pads outside your clothes?

[Signe]

Has anyone ever noticed the same mutant-y looking bloke appears in ALL those sorts of films from Australia.  He's in some films from other countries, too.  He's almost always a mutant and riding a motor bike.  It's that man from Midnight Oil, isn't it?