Useless Conversation

[Selby]

Honestly, is it really that complicated for some of yall to like...not be a dick once a year and just go balls to the wall on something where you can make more money?

My last job had a VP who looked at my review one year that I had tooted my horn pretty hard (expecting to be knocked down a notch) and his response was "no one is that awesome, especially someone that age.  The highest score I'm giving that kid is an 83%."  Before I had him as a VP I regularly got 95-97%.  It just so happened that 85% was the cutoff for giving someone a raise.  Boss games.

My current director is 3 levels above me, and his decree is that no one in his directorate will get a higher review score than he did (4.6 out of 7).  So by the time it's trickled down from him to my manager to me, I'll be lucky to get a 3.5-3.7.  It's a game.

And if it's a wage freeze year, it's best to have a not-great review so when you DO get to the raise years, you look like you had a great improvement!  It's all a damn game that doesn't mean much...

[RhyssaFireheart]

So we've finally joined the blu-ray club and discovered that our TV only has 1 HDMI connection and that's currently being used by the DirecTV box.  So component connection it is until we replace this TV. 

And then the BD movie the husband picked up (which is what prompted us finally getting a BD player) has freaking previews and a commercial on it!!!  Granted, we could hit next and move to the next preview until we got to the movie, but seriously?  The previews are one thing, but there was a freaking Fandango commercial on there!

[MisterNoisy]

Honestly, is it really that complicated for some of yall to like...not be a dick once a year and just go balls to the wall on something where you can make more money?

How does not wanting to write your own review equate to being a dick? I once had a manager who was supposed to write reviews of us and made us all write them about ourseives *for him*. Who is the dick in that scenario?

That bullshit's fucking institutionalized where I'm at now.  How am I being a dick if I don't want to have to rewrite out in extensive detail my own accomplishments to save the the guy that's riding same accomplishments to his own advancement?  Is it really too much to ask that that guy actually pay attention to what's happening around him for once?  FFS, I  wrote up the resume he rode to his new position during a consolidation (while I was on Thanksgiving vacation, no less), and yesterday, I got asked to type this shit (the same stuff I put on his resume, but from the perspective of someone that did the work) up again.  Fuck that shit.

[Viin]

And then the BD movie the husband picked up (which is what prompted us finally getting a BD player) has freaking previews and a commercial on it!!!  Granted, we could hit next and move to the next preview until we got to the movie, but seriously?  The previews are one thing, but there was a freaking Fandango commercial on there!

Yeah, they are doing this to more and more crap. It is really irritating. I don't buy movies anymore. (Well, except some Disney stuff for the kids, which *also* has ads for every Disney-themed show or movie ever produced - usually 5 in a row before the movie!).

[MisterNoisy]

Yeah, they are doing this to more and more crap. It is really irritating. I don't buy movies anymore. (Well, except some Disney stuff for the kids, which *also* has ads for every Disney-themed show or movie ever produced - usually 5 in a row before the movie!).

Fuck discs.  The last disc player I liked was an Apex that I reflashed to kill the region locks and add the ability to skip straight to main menu from anywhere.  All of the rest have been complete shit, but have thankfully coincided with the rise of streaming and on-demand as viable alternatives.

[Abagadro]

So we've finally joined the blu-ray club and discovered that our TV only has 1 HDMI connection and that's currently being used by the DirecTV box.  So component connection it is until we replace this TV. 

You can get a HDMI switch on Monoprice for pretty cheap.

[Rasix]

Personal Business Commitments

Winner.

This'll be the third time in 4 years that TWO managers are going to be giving me my "score".    For a quick rundown, we get anywhere from a 1 to a 5.  3 and lower and you're on the brink of being fired (I think 4 or 5 and you probably would know you're in serious trouble before getting it).  2 and you did fine, but probably fucked up a little or your boss doesn't like you.  2+ maybe you did a decent job, but there's only a set number of 1s and the managers trade those like poker chips.   Promotions are independent of this score. Hell, one of the two guys that got a band promotion in my department opens more invalid defects than anyone.  He's a disaster, but he's been around for a while.

Raises are based on your score and if we're giving raises.  Sometimes there is a cost of living adjustment but that's only based on your band and salary range in your band.  There wasn't one last year.  I got a performance based raise, it was small, but it was one of the bigger ones.  It was also the year I got an entire year with my manager.

Most years, you fill out your PBC, fill it full of accomplishments and you get back a response that lets you know: no one fucking read it.   You either noticeably did a ton, did fine, or fucked up.  If no one noticed you at all? Enjoy your 2. 

It's rigged.  I don't like wasting even part of a day on this.

[croaker69]

Honestly, is it really that complicated for some of yall to like...not be a dick once a year and just go balls to the wall on something where you can make more money?

How does not wanting to write your own review equate to being a dick? I once had a manager who was supposed to write reviews of us and made us all write them about ourseives *for him*. Who is the dick in that scenario?

The self-review is just the above management abdication codified in policy.  Poor busy managers doing more with less unlike those lazy workers.   

[cmlancas]

I fall in the camp of codifying the awesome shit you did this year.  Although I've been a victim of the gameplay as well for the past two years.

But, now that the guy works for another company?  +20% and a promotion.  Moral of the story, do good and someone will notice.  Even if it's just you and knowing you have integrity.

Unless you work for Stardock.  Then you're just fucked.

[Salamok]

(Well, except some Disney stuff for the kids, which *also* has ads for every Disney-themed show or movie ever produced - usually 5 in a row before the movie!.

I didn't realize that Disney had acquired the rights to 1984, Welcome to Disney "Fast" Play.

[Yegolev]

Ah, end of year reviews (Focal Point Review here, today at 3pm).  Time to sit down and have a bullshit session with my manager that is retiring at the end of the month, and goes on vacation at the end of this week.  I put stuff into the database as the year rolls around and I complete goals, so this will just be about finding out how appreciated ($$$) I am and doing a final "Where should I really be focusing my efforts to get ahead in this org?".  Also possibly some relatively honest discussion of the characters I will have to deal with in 2013.

I don't mind writing down what I did, even if it's not looked at.  Whether it is looked at will depend on what it is, which isn't always controllable.  I did get some great recognition for turning around the migration projects I was put in charge of, and the fact that we got a 9/10 final rating after the client leader had said "No way are they getting above an eight" was some sweet, sweet icing.  I could have busted my ass on things like day-to-day support and fixing ages-old infrastructure issues, but being a minor leader on a massive project was far more beneficial to me.  In particular, I'm in good with a Enterprise Architecture team lead.  Not that there are any openings, but still.  Meanwhile, I'm going to approach a leader of the internal automation team and ask how I can get involved.  Optimistic about 2013.

[bhodi]

But, now that the guy works for another company?  +20% and a promotion.  Moral of the story, do good and someone will notice.  Even if it's just you and knowing you have integrity.

That is not the moral of the story. The idea that if you put up with enough games and work harder, you'll get noticed and it'll eventually pay off isn't worth banking on. Everyone here is at least in mid-career and should already know the real moral of white collar work:

Raises/reviews are bullshit and a waste of time beyond using them for local personal feedback; If you're unhappy with compensation, continue your career path by switching jobs every 3-5 years and get your bump each time you do.

[Lantyssa]

My review goes something like:  "How fucked are you if I walk today?  That's my worth."

[Nebu]

My review goes something like:  "How fucked are you if I walk today?  That's my worth."

This is why I love you!

[Mrbloodworth]

Hurray for me getting commendable across all areas in my annual review.

[murdoc]

Personal Business Commitments

Winner.

This'll be the third time in 4 years that TWO managers are going to be giving me my "score".    For a quick rundown, we get anywhere from a 1 to a 5.  3 and lower and you're on the brink of being fired (I think 4 or 5 and you probably would know you're in serious trouble before getting it).  2 and you did fine, but probably fucked up a little or your boss doesn't like you.  2+ maybe you did a decent job, but there's only a set number of 1s and the managers trade those like poker chips.   Promotions are independent of this score. Hell, one of the two guys that got a band promotion in my department opens more invalid defects than anyone.  He's a disaster, but he's been around for a while.

Raises are based on your score and if we're giving raises.  Sometimes there is a cost of living adjustment but that's only based on your band and salary range in your band.  There wasn't one last year.  I got a performance based raise, it was small, but it was one of the bigger ones.  It was also the year I got an entire year with my manager.

Most years, you fill out your PBC, fill it full of accomplishments and you get back a response that lets you know: no one fucking read it.   You either noticeably did a ton, did fine, or fucked up.  If no one noticed you at all? Enjoy your 2. 

It's rigged.  I don't like wasting even part of a day on this.

Ours are based on a score of 1-5. There will be maybe a couple 1s and a couple 5s in the whole company, few more 2s and 3s but at least 75-80% of the people will fall into the 3 category. Bonuses are tied to your rating - I can't remember the exact percentages, but a 3 will get you anywhere from 9% to 25%, a 2 is 26-35%. Raises are outside that and are more dependant on where you fall in the Mercer scale and years of service.

Problem I have is that I spend a bunch of time on mine, I have a REALLY good meeting with my direct supervisor and then it's passed on to the IT Directory who is petty and obnoxious and will reduce that bonish % "just 'cause". It might only be reduced by 1-2%, but that's exactly the petty things he loves to do. What my Boss does to try to counter-act that is put me into a new category on the Mercer scale so my salary will jump instead of relying on the one time, heavily taxed bonus.

Which is ok by me.

[Yegolev]

I've found that while performance rating is tied to compensation, the real cause and effect is reversed from what they tell you.

[Strazos]

Where I work your immediate supervisor was responsible for drafting text on your accomplishments on specific duties, and then performance according to set principles. The reviewer (usually the person next up in chain of command) writes a general reviewing statement on the relationship with your rater, performance, potential, etc.

Everyone fucking hates it, but the way our culture works is that you're ultimately responsible for your own career. Good supervisors will solicit bullets from you on what you want them to talk about...the lazier ones will make you do it all for them (though I had a supervisor make me do it once as an exercise, which she then went back and put her own flavor to). Complicating this is that most reviews are written to portray the person as OMFGAWESOMESAUCE, so the challenge is to have done good stuff and figure out how to portray that as even MORE fucking awesome...while not breaking the bounds of believability or sanity.

Though apparently the new form for tenured officers (which I'll have to start using soon) places much more of the drafting responsibility upon the employee to basically say how they're awesome. Everyone fucking hates these things, but...it's how you get promoted and such, so oh well.

[Viin]

I hate performance reviews too, and I think they do jack-all. You'll get a promotion if you can be recognized as deserving one, no one is going back to read your performance reviews to see what is in there! Nothing you can put in a performance review will increase your likelihood of promotion *or* bonus. It is completely based on how your boss (and your boss' boss) feel about you.

Thus: waste. of. time.

[cmlancas]

Raises/reviews are bullshit and a waste of time beyond using them for local personal feedback; If you're unhappy with compensation, continue your career path by switching jobs every 3-5 years and get your bump each time you do.

I really do live in some rose-colored fantasyplace that doesn't correlate at all to anywhere else.  Our reviews matter a ridiculous amount.

[Nebu]

For me, the toughest part about evaluations is separating out effort, personality, and actual performance.  Often the people that perform the best (for me) aren't necessarily the best co-workers.  That's science for ya... too many Sheldons and too few Leonards.

[Yegolev]

Someone can be working really hard and not getting anywhere, so there's that.  I don't know how it works in academia, but in GLOBAL CORP you need to get some results that help the team/account/division in a noticeable way.

Review's over, far less bothersome than a tooth cleaning and much more satisfying result.  Now for 2013.

[Ironwood]

Sigh.  Some very wrong views here on both sides, I think.

Reviews should matter, but really don't.  Global recession, so most industries only give you a raise if they need you and you're walking and you should NEVER stay for that.  EVER.  It doesn't work.

Also, though we'd all like to think we're awesome geniuses, every, EVERY single one of you fuckers is 120% totally replaceable and easily so.

So, on the one hand :  Play the game and at least look keen, but know that the fuckers are shafting you every chance they get and, frankly, the bonuses are already allocated at the top and if you get a scrap, it won't be because you've put in 110%, it'll be because they hate the other option worse.  Sure, you got a raise, but you look like you could play golf and what were they gonna do, give it to a woman ?  Come on ?!

So.

Life sucks.  We're all fucked.  Especially you.

[Hammond]

Life sucks.  We're all fucked.  Especially you.

And then you die?   

Outside Debbie downer world ;) we got more goodies for Christmas.  Some cookies, chocolate stuff, and these rolled up sweet cake things. Eating right, diet what are these things. 

[Paelos]

Wow, amazingly defeatist outlook on some of those posts. I don't really buy into the "it's shit so don't bother" stuff.

[Yegolev]

I'm in the "it's shit but do it anyway" camp.  I mean, you're not going to move up if you dodge the whole thing.  Well, there's the Peter Principle and the golf course.  So.

The money is definitely already pre-allocated.  Good luck getting a piece if you're not a team player, though.

[Merusk]

Money for departments or divisions was always pre-allocated at prior jobs, not individuals.  How it was divide up beyond that always came down to performance reviews and selling yourself in them.

So many of the complaints sound like, "I have a shitty job but can't bother finding a new one."

[Selby]

So many of the complaints sound like, "I have a shitty job but can't bother finding a new one."

Some of us work in pretty specialized fields that make it difficult to just up and move to a new city to get a better job.

I still play the game though, acting like a team player while continuing to look out for my own interests (work\project related ones) seems to work pretty good.  Several managers have told me that I have nothing to worry about and don't sweat the layoffs that may\may not be coming...

[Viin]

Actually, I have a pretty good job. That doesn't mean I enjoy wracking my brain for paragraphs that explain how awesome I am (which is hard for me to do) - when I know no one but my immediate manager will even glance at it and he already knows this stuff!

[Viin]

Two Italian waffle cookies with three chocolate dipped marshmallows melted into a sandwich ... wow.

[Yegolev]

Oh, the female mind.  What must it be like?  A Dali painting?

[Chimpy]

Oh, the female mind.  What must it be like?  A Dali painting?

I think you are being optimistic there. A man can almost begin to understand a Dali painting.

[cmlancas]

We just got a new cat who we named Dali because his tuxedo markings endowed him with a Salvador Dali mustache.

What's a relatively good place to upload internety pictures for linkage?  I don't like my personal pictures floating around a series of tubes.

[Merusk]

We just got a new cat who we named Dali because his tuxedo markings endowed him with a Salvador Dali mustache.

What's a relatively good place to upload internety pictures for linkage?  I don't like my personal pictures floating around a series of tubes.

Dropbox.

[cmlancas]

Dropbox.

Enjoy your referral!  Let's see if I can do this correctly.
Here's Dali:  http://db.tt/J55fx5FW  (I know we have a cat thread, BUT THE MUSTACHE!)

//Maybe this time?


Fake edit:  Nope.  Anyone troubleshoot me in a PM how to embed pictures in my post from dropbox?