Useless Conversation

[Strazos]

where you flying from / through?
[snip]
My uncle lived in Egypt for about 3 years and his one comment was be careful when you drink beer / pop they often take half empties and combine them then recap them.  And do this over and over... the resulting "drink" can get quite ugly.

COO - CDG - CAI - AMM - TLV - CDG - COO

You have no idea how long it took to make this itinerary workable (it actually two, separate itineraries). And thanks for the drink tip.

It is ok NOT to make eye contact with random vendors- the moment you do they will swarm you and do pressure sales on their shitty goods.

Oh- and enjoy the absence of personal space.  Otherwise you are gonna have a blast.  And the food... God the food...

You know I've been in Africa for 10 months now, right? 

Yeah, totally looking forward to real food again.

[Yegolev]

How many beetles or their larvae have you intentionally eaten in the past ten months?

[Hammond]

COO - CDG - CAI - AMM - TLV - CDG - COO

Not bad actually.  Any overnights in there? 

On a side note one of my co-workers in the US flew into CDG - Moscow - Ankara - CDG back to the states recently with a couple overnights. His next trip is to Jordan / Turkey / potentially Egypt / Dubai.  That trip is going to cost somewhere around 20k just in hotel / airfare!      Co-worker is a interesting guy he actually knew Hafez al-Assad ( he was the president of Egypt in the 50 - 60's that got assassinated) back in the day.

Also watch out for the traffic in Egypt and the cabbies can be uh interesting.

[Strazos]

The actual overnights (for multiple days) are in Cairo and Jerusalem.

Fortunately, lodging is largely free as I'm staying with friends. And no cabs for me - probably getting a driver in most of these places.

[Minvaren]

So I found out this week that the breaker panel for my place is a lovely Federal model...  Along with 90% or more of the rest of my townhouse complex...   

Going to see if I can chat up the board/management company to get a bulk deal on replacement or retrofits.  At least it explains why I nearly fried myself a couple of years back when installing some GFCIs with the breakers thrown.

[Merusk]

Ugh.. best of luck, Minvaren.

[Abagadro]

So my wife bought a shirt for my boy that interacts with an app on his Ipad. For some reason this made me feel very old.

[ghost]

We probably need to have a talk, Ab..........

[Signe]

Either London is being bombed right now or they've decided to set the Para Olympic fireworks off in my bathroom.  Geez.  This is an old building.  I don't think it can take another round!

[Abagadro]

God damn power outage killed one of my refrigerators. 

[MuffinMan]

Better eat everything before it all goes bad.

[Morat20]

Just got back from the animal hospital. It turns out that my beagle did not, in fact, eat a straight pin. Or several. He merely ate the thing they were all shoved into.

Which you'd think would be the default, put apparently dogs are happy to swallow sharp, pointy metal objects. Because they are dogs, and stupid.

That was 300 bucks I'd have preferred to spend elsewhere....on the other hand, no surgery. So, overall plus.

[Paelos]

I'm fairly sure that 75% of domesticated dogs would be dead within a week if left to their own devices, for exactly that reason.

[Signe]

I was thinking about maybe getting take away tonight and saw an African restaurant.  I've never had authentic African food.  I had a plantain once and I ate a beetle when I was two but that's about it.  I was reading the menu and some of the dishes are described as "stir fry with tiger prawns and meat".  They advertise dishes with "beef, lamb or goat".  So which one of those do you reckon is the stir fry meat?  One of them?  All of them?  Something else?

[Paelos]

I'd certainly go with goat. You rarely get that here in the states.

Was it Ethopian?

[ghost]

Okay, here's a quick review of my trip to San Francisco.  We got there and were supposed to be using a car and staying at the flat one of my wife's old high school friends.  She was gracious enough to let us stay at her place and actually took a few days off of work to drive us around.  Then we went to Carmel and spent a couple of days, which was nice but not really my thing.  I would have preferred to stay in San Francisco for a couple of more days eating the food. 

The biggest treat of the entire trip, however, is that this person (while very, very nice and accommodating) is completely, 100% batshit insane.  I have rarely in my life been associated with someone that is willing to perpetrate such amazingly crafted, ridiculous and transparent lies (well, at least in person and not on teh inturnets  ).

Here is a sampling of the lies that we were told:

1.  Delivered her brother's baby-  she was in the hospital at the birth and explained to the doctor that she was in research and did surgery on laboratory animals.  Therefore the doctor said, "why don't you deliver the baby?  I'm going to go have lunch."   
2.  Circumcised her brother's baby-  same story about being a surgeon, but also got the "I was accosted while taking the baby to the procedure" line into it.  Apparently people were coming up to her and asking her where she was taking the baby and she got all sorts of grief about it.  Then she got to assist in the procedure.
3.  Lived with her boyfriend for several years in Pacific Heights in a multi-million dollar apartment-  This was a gem.  First she couldn't find the apartment.  "I always get this wrong".  Hello?  You lived there for two years.  Give me a break.  Of course this lie was verified later on when another high school friend showed up and said that she was full of shit and had never even lived with the boyfriend in question, in any capacity.
4.  Owned a late model Aston Martin-   
5.  Gave herself a tracheostomy-  was staying in a hotel in India and they began fumigating the hotel with some sort of noxious substance.  The friend felt obligated to stick her epipen into her trachea so she could breathe.  Apparently there were rampant problems with this fumigation after the tracheostomy and that "people might have died" if she hadn't been the "canary in the coal mine". 
6.  Owns the flat she lives in-  she stated that her flatmate was someone that she let live with her out of the kindness of her heart, yet after discussion with said flatmate it was uncovered that he had lived in the flat since 1995 and that it was, in fact, his kindness that allowed her to live with him.
7.  She redid all the wood floors in the flat that she lives in-  that is 30 year old scum in the nooks and crannies of the floor.  This didn't happen.
8.  Had drinks with George Shultz at the request of the owner of one of the restaurants that we went to-  I guess it could have happened, but I can't imagine George would go to a little hole in the wall restaurant like that. 
9.  Had a "board meeting" on a Sunday-  I guess this could happen, but with all the other lies I'm not buying it. 
10.  Was abducted out of her parents' house as a baby


I'm sure there were more, but these were just the ones that I could remember off of the top of my head.  She was quite the entertainment value.  I can't wait to go back.   

[Signe]

I don't know why you think it's all lies.  The exact same things happened to me when I went to visit my cousin, She-Ra, in Eternia.  Except for the board meeting.  That does sound like a trip you won't forget soon, though!  I had fun just reading about it.

And, yes, Paelos, it's an Ethiopian restaurant.  When I lived in New Mexico, I had goat once in a while.  The best was a goat chili I had at a barbecue.  I wish I could remember who made it!

[Salamok]

Ethiopian food is pretty good, don't try and guess the mystery meat just go for it.

[HaemishM]

I'd certainly go with goat. You rarely get that here in the states.

Was it Ethopian?

Goat's tasty if cooked well.

[Nebu]

Goat's tasty if cooked well.

With fava beans and a nice chianti?

[Sky]

My ex girlfriend's mother was a crazy pathological liar like that. It was pretty funny to me, but the ex was adamant that her mother was in no way full of shit, and a leading reason we broke up. My favorite was probably her constant phone meetings with David Geffen about Guns & Roses.

[Signe]

Hopefully they were to complain about what a douchebag Axl Rose is.

[HaemishM]

Hopefully they were to complain about what a douchebag Axl Rose is.

If there was any conversation about Axl Rose, I'm sure that came up. Often. Even in pretend land.

[Sky]

If there was any conversation about Axl Rose, I'm sure that came up. Often. Even in pretend land.

Quite the opposite. Though to be fair, this was circa Appetite. I'm sure there were many stories of personal betrayal later on, and she probably banged Myles Kennedy for revenge or something.

[ghost]

To be fair to this person, she was extremely accommodating, very, very nice and also a lot of fun.  From my standpoint it was more of a novelty situation.  She definitely fits into the "do not date under any circumstances" category, even though she is reasonably attractive. 

[NowhereMan]

My dad had a friend very like that. He was a ton of fun and generally very nice, certainly went out of his way on occasion to do people a favour. Of course he also explained to one woman he was dating that we were down on our luck and he was letting us stay at his house (he came to stay for a while and ended up not leaving for six months). Apparently he married this woman, sponged off her for a while and later tried to get half her money in the divorce. That said pathological liars are like that, they can be lovely people and are generally going to be entertaining since typically someone willing to come out with that kind of bullshit isn't going to be overly inhibited and can be quite creative however they can also rationalise doing pretty much fucking anything because the only way you can even start to come out with some of the outlandish lies they tell is if they've convinced themselves they're true.

It's one of the reasons shit like the Secret is potentially very harmful, spend enough time acting like something that isn't true is true and you start to blur the line in your head between reality and fiction.

[Ironwood]

the Secret ?

[Ingmar]

Presumably this useless piece of shit self-help nonsense:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Secret_(book)

[Signe]

If there was any conversation about Axl Rose, I'm sure that came up. Often. Even in pretend land.

Quite the opposite. Though to be fair, this was circa Appetite. I'm sure there were many stories of personal betrayal later on, and she probably banged Myles Kennedy for revenge or something.

What yummy revenge! 

My dad was clinically nuts but extremely well liked and even had "groupies".  When I was very young, he had beauty salons and did women's hair.  They would follow him around, much to my poor mom's dismay.  He told outrageous lies but everyone (except my mom) seemed to believe him.  He was a big hit with celebs.  Here's a pic of my dad doing Jayne Mansfield's hair.  Yeah, yeah.  She's cute.  I remember once, when I wasn't so young, hearing my dad tell my mom that he was late and drunk because he had tried to save the life of someone who was trying to be hit by a train.  It wasn't even the first time he used that story.  He might have been loopy, but there was always a bit of excitement (sometimes scary) going on.  Pity about the alcoholism, violence and infidelity.  Still, living with crazy people can be fun.

[Evildrider]

To be fair to this person, she was extremely accommodating, very, very nice and also a lot of fun.  From my standpoint it was more of a novelty situation.  She definitely fits into the "do not date under any circumstances" category, even though she is reasonably attractive. 

[ghost]

Somebody mentioned re-upping the tattoo thread?   

[Signe]

Is that you?  If so, I think you stole my nana's sunglasses.

[Nebu]

Is that you?  If so, I think you stole my nana's sunglasses.

I have missed you so very, very much.  

[Ironwood]

SHODAN chose a strange place to materialise this time.

[Signe]

So, last night I cut my finger... the little one.  I was digging in an old bag and a fucking motherfucker hair barrette bit me.  WHAT?  Anyway, it bled and bled so I washed it and wrapped it tight.  About 20 mins later, I unwrapped it so I could re-wrap it a little looser.  It bled and bled and bled.  Sheesh.  So I wrapped it again.  This morning the bandage was a mess so I unwrapped again, it did it's usual thing, and put a clean bandage on.  It's like a dot.  If it wasn't for the blood, you wouldn't be able to see it.  It won't stop bleeding!  It was a barrette!!  I have a doctor appt next Thursday.  It's not possible to bleed to death from a tiny hole you can't even see, is it?  If so, bye.