Useless Conversation

[voodoolily]

The boy got his grades today, all threes.  This is on a 1-3 scale since he's pre-k.  I was rightly amazed, he's going to a very academically-highly-rated school.  We took him to McDonald's.   Can't put it on the Facebook because the other parents would see, and no one likes that.

Ooh, gratz on the Boy Genius!  I can't wait to brag about my own genius spawn someday.   

[Oban]

So... the Shamwow guy was arrested for beating up a prostitute.
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2009/0327092sham1.html

[Yegolev]

Ooh, gratz on the Boy Genius!  I can't wait to brag about my own genius spawn someday.   

Thanks for allowing me the luxury.  I'm trying to remember that it's just pre-k and that it just means he's good with school now.  If life has taught me anything about academics, it's that it has little correlation to the real world.

So... the Shamwow guy was arrested for beating up a prostitute.
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2009/0327092sham1.html

Obviously being the ShamWow guy doesn't pay enough.

[Oban]

A thousand dollars for a prostitute is rather extreme, especially considering how she looks.

[Yegolev]

That's what I get for not reading the article.  I always think if you get arrested for beating up a hooker, you didn't pay her enough.

[gryeyes]

She bit his tongue and refused to let go. I think the beating was warranted in this situation.

[Sir T]

A thousand dollars for a prostitute is rather extreme, especially considering how she looks.

Hiring a hooker has not a great deal to do with looks.

[Nebu]

A thousand dollars for a prostitute is rather extreme, especially considering how she looks.

How she looks?  Have you seen the ShamWoW guy?  He must have to pay ugly, homeless women $1000. 

[Oban]

Hiring a hooker has not a great deal to do with looks.

Wow, no idea where you shop but yes it does.

[bhodi]

Well, she's not hideous.

Comparatively speaking to most of the women on TSG.

[gryeyes]

Paying 1,000 bucks for a chick who would fuck you for a line of blow and a twinkie is not a very good investment.

[Murgos]

"Upon arrival Co-Def gave her $1000 in cash. Seconds later when Co-Def attempted to kiss Def, she intentionally bit Co-Def's tongue.  Co-Def began to strike Def numerous times in the face area so she would let go of his tongue."

Nothing like a bit of crazy to spice up the flavor of your life.   

[Endie]

She looks like she might have been worthwhile before the meth began to take its toll.  Not a thousand bucks though.

[Big Gulp]

She bit his tongue and refused to let go. I think the beating was warranted in this situation.

My question is why you'd bother kissing a hooker in the first place.

[Oban]

Odd, I think all the houses in my area have lost their electricity, but my house is fine.  I guess I should turn on the backup generator just in case and drive around to see how far the outage goes.

[Salamok]

happy belated earth day?

edit: oh wait it is earth hour which miraculously doesn't fall on the same day as earth day.

[rattran]

I told 3 groups of people today that avocados are chupacabra poop. One group believed me, until someone mentioned they thought chupacabras were endangered.

I need new friends.

[MrHat]

I told 3 groups of people today that avocados are chupacabra poop. One group believed me, until someone mentioned they thought chupacabras were endangered.

I need new friends.

Thank you for this.  You made my day.

[Salamok]

Speaking of chupacabras, costco had some 3 foot tall haas avacado trees for sale.  I wonder what the odds are of one of these living to maturity in my yard (Austin).  I seem to remember young avacado trees being pretty fragile but we did have 2 mature avacado trees in my yard growing up that were awesome.  Although, that was in Fresno where it was 10 degrees warmer and a whole lot drier.

[voodoolily]

Weird, I'm on my way to Fresno right now! 

[Salamok]

Weird, I'm on my way to Fresno right now! 

I feel sorry for you.  You can redeem a small portion of your trip if you go have a sandwich for me at Piemonte's.

[stray]

 

I stumbled upon this Thai brand, and while it's no Shim Ramyun in flavor or noodle quality, this is quite fucking hot. Hssssssssss  Shim is merely tasty in comparison, and really only gets you once you sip the broth. This stuff punishes you on each bite (beef flavor btw).

[edit] fuck, getting a good chug is like one of the most masochistic, yet satisfying things you can do

[Yegolev]

Odd, I think all the houses in my area have lost their electricity, but my house is fine.  I guess I should turn on the backup generator just in case and drive around to see how far the outage goes.

How far down your street did you get?  Also, did you leave all your lights on while you were gone?

[Sky]

I was thinking about getting a barn owl, then I learned that they won't kill squirrels as squirrels aren't nocturnal. Shitballs. Back to the drawing board in my game of neighborhood warfare.

Lady three houses down feeds fucking squirrels and I have the trees they live in...for now. I'm in a pretty good alliance with the resident fascist, and I don't want to piss her off by discharging firearms, which would be my normal method to deal with these tree rats.

I used to be a deadshot with a slingshot, took out squirrels at an apartment I use to live in with one. Maybe it's time to practice again, marbles are cheap.

I don't even want to talk about that fucking chipmunk.

[Yegolev]

Cats beat chipmunks, in my experience.  Squirrels, however, require creativity.  Good luck.

[Johny Cee]

I was thinking about getting a barn owl, then I learned that they won't kill squirrels as squirrels aren't nocturnal. Shitballs. Back to the drawing board in my game of neighborhood warfare.

Lady three houses down feeds fucking squirrels and I have the trees they live in...for now. I'm in a pretty good alliance with the resident fascist, and I don't want to piss her off by discharging firearms, which would be my normal method to deal with these tree rats.

I used to be a deadshot with a slingshot, took out squirrels at an apartment I use to live in with one. Maybe it's time to practice again, marbles are cheap.

I don't even want to talk about that fucking chipmunk.

Chipmunks are a colony critter...   so if you see one,  there's probably a bunch more.  Chipmunks don't bother me much, since they're burrowers.  Unless you try to lay down some outdoor tile/patio type stuff,  in which case they're pure horror:  they'll burrow underneath and upset your carefully leveled tile.

Fucking squirrels will try to move into your eaves and have a tendency to munch on wires.  Maybe you should take up taxidermy,  then hold meetings with your stuffed squirrels.  

You could always start feeding feral cats,  who would then displace the squirrels.  Of course then,  you would have a feral cat problem...  which means you have to attract foxes or coyotes,  to take care of the feral cats....   Hmm.

[Oban]

How far down your street did you get?  Also, did you leave all your lights on while you were gone?

Of course I left the lights on while I drove around.

Power seemed to come back on at around 9:30 and I filled my gas tank back up before I headed home.

[Murgos]

Cats beat chipmunks, in my experience.  Squirrels, however, require creativity.  Good luck.

If you could induce a falcon to nest in the area it would clear up the problem.  It's easy to tell when there is a falcon around, all the squirrels are on the side of the tree away from its sight, motionless and giving their alarm call.

[Endie]

I was thinking about getting a barn owl, then I learned that they won't kill squirrels as squirrels aren't nocturnal. Shitballs. Back to the drawing board in my game of neighborhood warfare.

Lady three houses down feeds fucking squirrels and I have the trees they live in...for now. I'm in a pretty good alliance with the resident fascist, and I don't want to piss her off by discharging firearms, which would be my normal method to deal with these tree rats.

I used to be a deadshot with a slingshot, took out squirrels at an apartment I use to live in with one. Maybe it's time to practice again, marbles are cheap.

I don't even want to talk about that fucking chipmunk.

Chipmunks are a colony critter...   so if you see one,  there's probably a bunch more.  Chipmunks don't bother me much, since they're burrowers.  Unless you try to lay down some outdoor tile/patio type stuff,  in which case they're pure horror:  they'll burrow underneath and upset your carefully leveled tile.

Fucking squirrels will try to move into your eaves and have a tendency to munch on wires.  Maybe you should take up taxidermy,  then hold meetings with your stuffed squirrels.  

You could always start feeding feral cats,  who would then displace the squirrels.  Of course then,  you would have a feral cat problem...  which means you have to attract foxes or coyotes,  to take care of the feral cats....   Hmm.

Yep, before you know it you're wondering how to deal with the out-of-control redneck problem who are eating the squirrels, chipmunks, feral cats, foxes and tiles.

Also, I got the janitor/squirrel reference.  Nicely played.

[Yegolev]

Now I suppose Sky is going to turn to falconry.  The posts will be entertaining.

[Sky]

Oh, Donald!

[voodoolily]

Weird, I'm on my way to Fresno right now! 

I feel sorry for you.  You can redeem a small portion of your trip if you go have a sandwich for me at Piemonte's.

Luckily, I'm staying in Paso Robles, but if I have time I'll hit Piemonte's. I'll even take pictures. I'm trying to hit all the diners and greasy spoons I can take make this trip bloggable (travelling for work ftw).

[Sky]

Because you secretly want to be Guy Fieri.

[Salamok]

Weird, I'm on my way to Fresno right now! 

I feel sorry for you.  You can redeem a small portion of your trip if you go have a sandwich for me at Piemonte's.

Luckily, I'm staying in Paso Robles, but if I have time I'll hit Piemonte's. I'll even take pictures. I'm trying to hit all the diners and greasy spoons I can take make this trip bloggable (travelling for work ftw).

Fresno is like the fast food capital of the world, if it isn't at the very least a chain restaurant the picket lines form.  Eating out there is easily the least value for my dollar of any city I have lived in.  Piemonte's (and a few of the other tower district relics) managed to make it simply because they have been there long enough to predate the trend.

Last time I was back I made the mistake of going to one of the newer trendy yuppy restaurants who's cooks were right out of hells kitchen episode 1 (any season) and it was abysmal.  I think bored rich white women who can't cook, have zero taste and no originality designed the menus.  They actually managed to fleece us to the tune of $80 a head because our waiter either had the DT's or some severe nervous disorder and we couldn't stop ourselves from ordering bowls of hot soup and filled to the rim martini type drinks.

[rattran]

I feed the squirrels. They were living in one section of the eaves when I got here, and haven't colonized further. Only really a problem in early March when they go nuts breeding, but I'm in Az then. The wires aren't easily accessible for them, so that's fine.
I also feed the birds, woodchucks, and skunks, which helps support the local cats. Though about twice a year one of the neighbors calls animal control about the 'giant rats' (woodchucks) living in my backyard. They don't bother to come out anymore, I just get a message.