More than meets the eye.

[Rasix]

I've been swimming in good games all year. What the hell are you babbling about?

Michael Bay.  This is Michael Bay.  This will suck as bad as the Godzilla movie with Matthew Brodderick.

[stray]

Relatively speaking, that is. The film industry, in my mind, is terrific. US and otherwise. There's so much good stuff I don't even bother with bitching about the bad.

2006 was a good year for games though, I'll admit. It's just that my last few PC purchases have made me particularly gloomy.

[Rasix]

2006 was a good year for games though, I'll admit. It's just that my last few PC purchases have made me particularly gloomy.

Get a console or two. There's just so much out there I want to buy and want to play but reality keeps me from doing so.

Kind of like the film industry.  Lots of good stuff.  Not enough time/money/commitment to experience it all.  Same with books.  It's too easy to be entertained nowadays (for me at least). 

Best I expect out of this movie is to be entertained in the Terminator III kind of way.  There will be some interesting scenes inbetween large swathes of pure suckage.

[Signe]

I might sit in the movie theatre parking lot this year just to see what sort of person goes to see "Black Christmas" ON Christmas day!

[Strazos]

I saw Borat. It was good, but not nearly as good as it was hyped to be. I never got around to seeing Departed.

I rarely go to the movies nowadays anyway....too fucking expensive for about 2 hours of Possible enjoyment. I have other things to do.

[stray]

Get a console or two.

No arguments here. That's where 90% of where my fun in gaming has been the past 3 years.

Even so, and this was my only point, there are enough shitty games out there as to shape my general impression of the industry as negative. I don't view the film industry in quite the same way. There really isn't a gap in good new releases with films like there are with games. There are many slumps even during "good" gaming years.


Then again, it could be about tastes and prejudice. I can enjoy any genre of film. Mindless blockbuster action, historical drama, two people talking in a white room, even the sappiest kind of chick flicks. I don't care. Just as long as they're good on a general artistic level.

I can be biased towards some game genres though -- or even burned out on ones I like. Closing myself out could be the source of me going through so many dry periods. There could be a shitload more good games than I'm willing to admit. Who knows..


Anyways...Sorry for the rant. That's probably more than I needed to explain.

[Ironwood]

NECRO!

Keeping in mind that, if nothing else, Bay knows how to cut a fucking teaser, check this out.

http://uk.promotions.yahoo.com/transformers/

Full screen doesn't work on Intel Macs, for some stupid reason.

Oh God, that's awful.

[Zetleft]

Wait of them looked kinda like a red and blue truck.... yeah my nostalgia should be kicking in any minute 

Fuck Michael Bay

[Kail]

I tend to be very forgiving of movies, so I'll probably be going to see it either way, but... are they really trying to make Transformers into a taut, suspenseful thriller?  I seem to recall a lot less of this brooding, "Oh, my dear God," humans standing in awe as their fragile world is destroyed around them, oh the humanity, etc. etc., and more of the "Look, it's Megatron, pewpew" kind of thing when I recall the cartoon.

[ahoythematey]

The cartoon was barely more than a vehicle to sell toys.  I'm guessing the movie will barely be more than a vehicle of product placement with lots of eye candy and spectacle.  Michael Bay's last movie I saw(The Island) was less than shit, so I'll probably see this should I be alive in July.

[Margalis]

God damn this movie looks awful.

The Transformers are supposed to transform from vehicles into robots. The robot forms are supposed to look like transformed vehicles, kind of boxy and with recognizable vehicle parts. Instead these things just look like completely generic CGI robots. I mean Optimus Prime looks like a fucking truck standing upright and Soundwave looks like a tape recorder with legs. Is this really a difficult concept?

The tone of the movie looks like typical Bay schlock, it is supposed to look really dramatic but it's just Michael Bay corny bullshit. The man doesn't have a dramatic bone in his body.

[Ironwood]

It's the robot mode that's totally, totally fucking me off.  It's all organic and shitty.

There's some stuff floating around the net that shows you what the toys will look like (which, alas, shows you directly what the movie robots will look like).  It's totally, totally asstastic.  Megatron looks like he was grown in a vat.  Real 'War of The Worlds' stuff.

As pointed out, these robots SHOULD resemble the 'other' forms they take.

I think it might be a good 'robots beat the shite out of each other' movie, but it's NOT going to be Transformers.

[Merusk]

There is only ONE Transformers movie.*  It's got celebs like Leonard Nimoy, Orson Wells, Judd Nelson and Robert Stack, a song by Weird Al and awesome robot vs robot fight scenes.  It's the ONLY Transformers movie there is, much like Highlander.

*And it's now out on a 20th anniversary DVD, whee x-mas.

[stray]

Lol, Judd Nelson ;)

The Transformers cartoon is unique in that it might be the only kid's cartoon that slaughtered 90% of the characters. Mostly the good guys too.

[Ironwood]

Only when it came to the Movie.  The Movie was a bloodbath.

[HaemishM]

It's the robot mode that's totally, totally fucking me off.  It's all organic and shitty.

Yeah, I kept noticing that and thinking "maybe they aren't done transforming?" If that's their look, it's sucktistic. It's fucking Transformers. They already look cool, just make the shit look alive and you are golden.

Michael Bay really is an assclown of the highest order. He took a great first half of a movie and turned it into "Kill Boromir" while not letting Scarlett Johansen show off her jublies. The man should be flayed, or have his ball license revoked.

EDIT: Are these the toys you mean? Optimus Prime with a flame job.

WHAT... THE... FUCK?

Did he suddenly turn gay along with having parts that do not look like they work together at all?

[Margalis]

Why take a property that has dozens of recognizable, well-done character designs and change them all? I will never understand why Hollywood constantly does this sort of thing. Just make a CGI Megatron, Prime and Soundwave and call it a day. Why throw out years of what is essentially pre-production work?

[Ironwood]

EDIT: Are these the toys you mean? Optimus Prime with a flame job.

WHAT... THE... FUCK?

Did he suddenly turn gay along with having parts that do not look like they work together at all?

Yup.  And now you've re-linked that, you'll notice they were IN the trailer looking like that.

It's gonna suck. And that's not something I usually say...

[SurfD]

I dont know, while nostalgia is "good" and all that, I for one am going to reserve my opinion untill after i see the movie in action to decide if I would rather have the rose coloured glasses back on or not.

I mean, yes, the cartoons had your classic, obviously recognizable figures. Optimus looks signifigantly like a semi truck who just stood up, and Soundwave looks like someone just twisted a Tape deck around like a rubix cube.  While that may have worked swimmingly for its intended audience (5 to 8 year old kids), can you HONESTLY say you would be impressed / Intimidated by a similar transformation in the modern day?

I mean, think about it.  The blocky, chunky look of most of your Cartoon Transformers was likely a DIRECT reflection of the fact that the toy tech at the time only allowed for such basic, blocky transforming toys.

I personally think the much more Fluid Robotic look of the movie figures fits what I would expect from a Highly advanced, transforming robot.

[Jain Zar]

I would not be afraid of something that looks like a retarded Lego Bionicle Buttbaby.  Disgusted, yeah.  Frightened?  Not so much.

[WindupAtheist]

I tend to be very forgiving of movies, so I'll probably be going to see it either way, but... are they really trying to make Transformers into a taut, suspenseful thriller?  I seem to recall a lot less of this brooding, "Oh, my dear God," humans standing in awe as their fragile world is destroyed around them, oh the humanity, etc. etc., and more of the "Look, it's Megatron, pewpew" kind of thing when I recall the cartoon.

Exactly.

Needs more pewpew and Stan Bush, less awe and Bionicle.  I want Transformers who look at least vaguely like the Transformers, kicking the shit out each other to a noisy rock score.

[Ironwood]

Jings

[Yegolev]

Normally you bring relevant topics to my attention.  What gives?

[Ironwood]

Eh ?

[Chimpy]

The rationalizations quoted for making Bumblebee into a Camaro instead of a Beetle are so transparent.

Why can't people in the movie industry just say outright that "Company X paid us a bunch of money to use only their products, so we had to change the entire concept of x/y/z to fit into their idea of which of their products they want advertised".

And ya, this movie will most likely suck, but I will probably still see it based on nostalgia alone.

[DraconianOne]

Why can't people in the movie industry just say outright that "Company X paid us a bunch of money to use only their products, so we had to change the entire concept of x/y/z to fit into their idea of which of their products they want advertised"..

From the official movie site (news dated 20-Feb-2007)

'Transformers' is a compelling project and offers us a global platform for marketing GM products and building our brands.  It represents the perfect intersection of entertainment, marketing and design.

We are thrilled to be working with GM on this incredible and action-packed film.  Having integrated the cars as characters in the film is truly an innovative concept that will help eventize (sic) this exciting 4th of July tentpole film.

The first time I saw the new Camaro, while touring the GM design center, I knew immediately it would be the perfect Bumblebee.  It's got beautiful lines and a classic, timeless look.  There were no other cars that came close.  I have a great working relationship with GM for many years am psyched to be working with them on 'Transformers'.

So pretty much wearing their hearts on their sleeves about this - Transformers is, as we all knew, a marketing oppurtunity for GM. 

I'm off to eventize something.

[Jain Zar]

^^^ While it is a GM marketing joyride, Bumblebee isn't allowed to be a VW Bug because VW are assholes and haven't let Hasbro or Takara make him into a Bug for some anti war toy bullshit reason or another.

Its why we never got an Alternators Bumblebee while many other car makers were happy to let Hasbro and Takara make stupidly detailed (and annoying to transform!) 1/24 scale cars.  Jeep, Toyota (Scion), Mazda, Ford, Chevy, Jaguar, Subaru...  but no V Dub.  Because they suck.  Germany: Stupid about videogames and about war toys.  Ruining fun via guilt complex!

[DraconianOne]

^^^ While it is a GM marketing joyride, Bumblebee isn't allowed to be a VW Bug because VW are assholes and haven't let Hasbro or Takara make him into a Bug for some anti war toy bullshit reason or another.

Shame.  I always liked the vague irony of one of the most popular icons of 80s pop culture being a heroic robot, fighting the good fight, who could transform into a car originally built by Porsche and designed by one Herr A. Hitler.

[eldaec]

At risk of being ported to Politics, I'm going to point out that at least the Germans have a reason to have a war complex. There are some countries that manage to have (just for example) a nipple complex without any historical justfication whatsoever.


Different folks are hypersensitive about different crap, it's probably democracy or some shit.


Personally I'm more disappointed about how the nipple complex has affected previous Micheal Bay films than about how Germany's war complex is going to affect Transformers (See Haemish's earlier point).

[Riggswolfe]

That new trailer looks like this might be a fun movie to go see. We'll see.

[Yegolev]

I might think so except for Michael Bay.  I like Van Helsing, though, so it's not outside the realm of possibility but I still remember how The Island worked out.

[Lantyssa]

I liked Van Helsing, too, but not because it was cinematic art.  It was definately a popcorn flick.

[Yegolev]

Oh right, it's not Citizen Kane or Unforgiven by any means, but it is head-and-shoulders above The Island.

[Ironwood]

Um.  They were both shite.

Shitey shite McShite.

Join me next week on Film 2007 for further in depth reviews.

[Rasix]

I have to agree with the Scot, Van Helsing was vomit inducing terrible.  It was like some sort of monster movie madlib filled in by a complete retard.  I can only imagine the discussion that preempted greenlighting that disaster.

Producer: Ok, my 11 year old son thinks it would be totally "sweet" if we could somehow get Dracula, Frankenstein, and a werewolf in the same movie.  Make it happen people. Consider that a double-dog dare.   And get that chick from Underworld in it.  I want her in a corset!

Edit: You are aware, however, that Michael Bay did not direct Van Helsing.