Keeping the bullcrap in one place.

[Train Wreck]

Ice-Cream vendor attacks dentist with ninja sword for pulling the wrong tooth.

Humans linked to cat asthma attacks.

Elderly British vacationers trapped in crazed sex party hell.

[Evangolis]

Humans linked to cat asthma attacks.

There is justice in the universe after all.

[Yegolev]

Humans linked to cat asthma attacks.

There is justice in the universe after all.

Amen.

[HaemishM]

Elderly British vacationers trapped in crazed sex party hell.

Watchdog editor Sandy Smith said: "We decided to go out ourselves because we wanted to be sure the couples who complained to us weren't just a bit prudish.

Yeah, I'm sure it was purely altruistic. Had I never met my lovely wife, I'd have volunteered to investigate it myself.

[Yegolev]

Hmmm, the Blue Bay resort?  *scribbles*

[Train Wreck]

Would-be burglar gets stuck in window and dies, but not before pants fall off.


Hicks get $2,500 strip club fee waved because they thought they were getting one continuous, hour and a half long dance because the music never stopped.


Elderly man crashes car through Burger King's front entrance, pulls away, parks, and orders.  Found eating lunch at table when police arrive.


Tripple-Dumbass

[Train Wreck]

Big pile of poop runs for mayor.

Mr. Floatie is a high-profile and tireless reminder of Victoria's practice of pumping raw sewage into the Strait of Juan de Fuca.
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The man inside the costume, James Skwarok, says the city appears to be taking issue with his candidacy because only real persons can run.

It's an objection he finds moot.

"Of course I'm not a real person, I'm a big piece of poop."

The move by the city to keep Mr. Floatie off the throne of power has left him "beyond bummed out. I was fuming."

[TheWalrus]

Unfortunately, Mr. Floatie has been removed from the ballot. Victorias assertion is that being Canadian, and the thus descended from England, their shit doesn't stink.

[Train Wreck]

That must be why the city feels entitled to dump raw sewage into the bay.

[Sky]

Sanitation in cities is a very recent innovation, really. Chicago was still putting raw sewage into the river a couple decades ago. Their system is incredibly fascinating, though.

[Train Wreck]

Would-be Carjacker gets car door slammed on leg, freshly brewed scalding hot coffee thrown in this face, wrestled to the ground, and face grinded into the dirt.  Manages to escape.


Cocky student shows up at other school dance wearing an inflatable penis costume.  School officials pissed.  Parents describe him as a straight-A student, an athlete and a "good kid".


When asked by flame-throwing acrobat at Renaissance fair if he could set his hair on fire, man foolishly answered yes.  "Surely, I thought he was jesting."


Newsflash:  drunks and saltwater crocs don't play well together.

[Mesozoic]

Breaking News:  Useless News Forum at F13 Finally Just Replaced With Link to Fark.

[Train Wreck]

heh.  yep.  But then you have to go through hundreds of headlines.

Granted, it's not as bad as fishing through the Blizzard WoW forums to find the golden thread here and there.  Who has the time?

Well, I guess all of us do, since we're posting from work.

[Train Wreck]

Is there a special reason you decided to be a douchebag, by the way?

[Mesozoic]

It's the result of a douchebag policy.