You have very nice biscuits... for a man.

[Shockeye]

GARNER CALLS HER BREASTS 'BISCUITS'

ALIAS star JENNIFER GARNER has adopted a bizarre name for her breasts - she refers to them as biscuits.

The pregnant brunette beauty, married to her DAREDEVIL co-star BEN AFFLECK, is proud of her ample assets - and the moniker she's taken on for them.

She says, "My sisters and I were all endowed with biscuits - that's what I call them.

"Sometimes when I'm on the Alias set and the guys are setting up a camera shot, I'll ask, 'Is this a biscuit shot?' and they'll say, 'Yeah,' so I know."

30/08/2005 09:20

[WayAbvPar]

There is a 'buttering biscuits" joke just dying to be made here...

[Shockeye]

There is a 'buttering biscuits" joke just dying to be made here...

I was thinking more of a "Biscuits 'n Gravy" joke...

[Yegolev]

Too... many... lewd... jokes... paralysis... taking... hold...

[Sobelius]

And I probably could go without saying anything about biscuits and sausage, though I will admit I prefer sausage sans biscuits.

[Strazos]

I am still 100% not attracted to him....erm, her, whatever Garner is.

[schild]

I am still 100% not attracted to him....erm, her, whatever Garner is.

Shocking, really.

[Shockeye]

And I probably could go without saying anything about biscuits and sausage, though I will admit I prefer sausage sans biscuits.

It would be sausge gravy, of course.

[Yegolev]

And I probably could go without saying anything about biscuits and sausage, though I will admit I prefer sausage sans biscuits.

Haven't seen you in a while.  I hoped to draw you out when I was talking about going to YaoiCon.  But then, that stuff is for girls.

The "biscuits and sausage" one is the one I was trying to hold back.

[Miasma]

And I probably could go without saying anything about biscuits and sausage, though I will admit I prefer sausage sans biscuits.

Haven't seen you in a while. I hoped to draw you out when I was talking about going to YaoiCon. But then, that stuff is for girls.

The "biscuits and sausage" one is the one I was trying to hold back.

Yes, you probably missed Shockeye keeping his promise.

[HaemishM]

Considering Affleck's apparent proclivity for dropping his sack on Kevin Smith's shoulder while the latter is trying to direct, I'd be more inclined to say something about how she must like biscuits with her teabagging.

[Sobelius]

Considering Affleck's apparent proclivity for dropping his sack on Kevin Smith's shoulder while the latter is trying to direct...

Evidence please? With photos preferably? Kevin Smith is the shnitz when it comes to having fun with sexual identity and orientation ambiguity. And he's cute to boot. If only more men -- hetero and homo -- could just have a big old laugh at life the way he does.

[HaemishM]

Somewhere in this forum is a thread talking about Affleck's practical jokes with his testicles.

[schild]

In fact, he calls the maneuver a "Fruit Basket."

Btw, Sobelius, his ability to laugh at the world comes from his faith in god. While it's great he can laugh, I prefer laughing come from bleakness and apathy than the father, son, and holy ghost. That said, he's a cool cat.

[Jain Zar]

Smith is one of the few people who tries to be happy about his faith, which I can respect.

[Shockeye]

Ben and his fruit basket.

[Sobelius]

Is there something about KS deriving "happiness from his faith" that implies something I'm just missing? I'm not getting the point here.

[Sobelius]

Ben and his fruit basket.

Wow -- thanks for that enlightening thread. Now I understand the hobbit pr0n references, too.

I *love* the friendship of Sam and Frodo in LOTR. I love the genuine love these two people have for each other. I love that it has nothing to do with sex. I love that it is the kind of friendship that says I would lay down my life for you -- and that I can look you in the eye and without words experience tenderness and compassion and find joy and strength.  It requires a special level of trust and true intimacy that, unfortunately, most of us only experience when we are also romantically and sexually intimate with someone else.

<soapbox>
I am always saddened, though, when people just don't get that this kind of love between two people can exist non-sexually, whether it's two male friends, two female friends, or a male and female who are friends. It's love that transcends gender and dissipates all the other smoke we blow because this kind of love truly TERRIFIES us. It asks us to genuinely love someone else.
</soapbox>

(Edit: And yes -- I experienced a deep joy when Sam is holding Frodo close to him on the slopes of mount doom -- and couldn't help but cry -- and was also aware my mind and emotions wanted to sexualize the scene just to avoid the paradox of feeling joy and grief in the same moment in time.)

[stray]

Amen brother!

Or...

You go girl!

Whatever works...

You're right though.

[HaemishM]

You may be right, Sobelius, but I still felt the stirrings of "Please God, don't let them kiss" when I saw the scenes you were talking about.

[Sobelius]

You may be right, Sobelius, but I still felt the stirrings of "Please God, don't let them kiss" when I saw the scenes you were talking about.

No surprise. Most of us born in the US or Canada in the 20th century have grown up in a world of images and behavioral messages that say any time two people get as close as these two do in this scene, the instinctual association is sex and romance. And especially in film imagery -- the idea of the "silver screen" is almost synonymous with an image of a man and woman embracing, faces close to each other, and the inevitable kiss. I'd bet money that my male cousins in South America and Italy did not have this reaction. In my experience, they are far more comfortable with men being physically close as well as emotionally close -- I'm stereotyping here, I realize, but with the possible exception of Britain, most men anywhere else in the world do not have difficulty touching, looking at, being held by, or being physically close to, another man and/or associating this behavior with sex/sexuality/romance.

I do admire straight men who can admit their unease with the idea of homosexual acts -- of course they'd feel uneasy; it's not natural for *them*! -- yet don't get freaked out by the idea of sharing the world with men who are different from them.

side note: I shouldn't be too hard on the British -- after all, Virgin Airlines made one of my alltime favorite commercials for their first class sleeping service. If I can find a link to the commercial, I will post it.

[MrHat]

Thats a little deep for a thread about biscuits.

[Sobelius]

Actually it was a thread about these biscuits...

[MrHat]

whaaaaa?

[Mesozoic]

I now actually want to hotlink to that site.

[Sobelius]

I am still 100% not attracted to him....erm, her, whatever Garner is.

Hmmm...yeah...I guess the photo I posted above could be a really fierce drag queen...or not... :-D

[HaemishM]

I do admire straight men who can admit their unease with the idea of homosexual acts -- of course they'd feel uneasy; it's not natural for *them*! -- yet don't get freaked out by the idea of sharing the world with men who are different from them.

I'll be the first to defend "gay rights" or whatever it's being called these days, have no problem with homosexuals whatsoever. But that doesn't mean I want to see two burly lumberjacks snogging at the cinema.

Now two women? Commence the snogging. As a matter of fact, I think a camera should be mandatory whenever two hot women kiss.

[Strazos]

I am still 100% not attracted to him....erm, her, whatever Garner is.

Hmmm...yeah...I guess the photo I posted above could be a really fierce drag queen...or not... :-D

Photoshop is a thing of beauty.

[Shockeye]

[schild]

She has bewbies now! Maybe her and Courtney Cox can team in in Alias!

[HaemishM]

Whoa.

[AOFanboi]

I call to thee, Thread: Rise from your grave!

It seems Alias will be terminated in May.

Maybe "Mrs. Affleck" will do a Katie Holmes and substitute child rearing for acting jobs? Do I write that with hope in my words? Not sure.

Fan uses his artistic abilities for useless stuff.

[Shockeye]

Jennifer Garner reportedly delivers baby girl
Magazine says ‘Alias’ star, husband Ben Affleck to name daughter Violet

MSNBC News Services
Updated: 3:04 p.m. ET Dec. 1, 2005

‘Alias’ star Jennifer Garner gave birth to a baby girl Wednesday night, according to US Weekly. The 33-year-old actress and her husband, actor Ben Affleck, reportedly plan to name their daughter Violet.

Garner, whose due date was December 8, reportedly had the baby after labor was induced. According to a US Weekly source, Affleck, 33, attended the birth.

The celebrity couple were married June 29 on the Caribbean island of Turks and Caicos. Garner's 'Alias' co-star Victor Garber officiated at the sunset ceremony.

Representatives for Garner and Affleck were unavailable for comment.

What, no Harley Quinn, Pilot Inspektor, Banjo, Apple or Moxie Crimefighter? The kid actually has a chance to be respected by its peers instead of ridiculed day in and day out for a completely fucking stupid name? Kudos to Bennifer v2.0.

[schild]

Moxie Crimefighter is the best name ever, dorkus.

[Shockeye]

Moxie Crimefighter is the best name ever, dorkus.

Pilot Inspektor is pretty close to best ever especially since it's the name of Jason Lee's child and that child will be a Scientologist just like daddy. Thetans beware.