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Topic: Dear Haemish: We Wish To Cause You Physical Harm (Read 14120 times)
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Furiously
Terracotta Army
Posts: 7199
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How did she look hot in the terminator is my question...
edit - damn you Jdub.
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Yegolev
Moderator
Posts: 24440
2/10 WOULD NOT INGEST
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Maybe Kingsley has become a scientologist.
He might get better parts if he was. |
Why am I homeless? Why do all you motherfuckers need homes is the real question.
They called it The Prayer, its answer was law
Mommy come back 'cause the water's all gone
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Shockeye
Staff Emeritus
Posts: 6668
Skinny-dippin' in a sea of Lee, I'd propose on bended knee...
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I always get Michael Madsen and that dude with the fake penis who beat up Heidi Fleiss confused.
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Signe
Terracotta Army
Posts: 18942
Muse.
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Nearly everyone loves Sean Connery but he's also proof that some people just can't say no. Maybe Ben Kingsley is the same way. I saw an interview once with Sean Connery and he said, as a defense, that he felt it was better to be working than looking for work. I suppose some people will take nearly anything if it's all that's on the table.
Silly people... why work if you don't have to? If I had as much money as Connery, I'd say no to everything.
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My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
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Riggswolfe
Terracotta Army
Posts: 8045
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Sean Connery has said no to lots of stuff. He turned down the part of Gandalf in Lord of the Rings for instance. Problem is, he either has no clue what will be a good movie or has the worst agent in the world. Next to Ben Kingsley's.
I have also seen the trailer Haemish. It was 5 minutes. Which was about 4 and a 1/2 minutes too long. Which is weird. I liked the actress in T3. I like Michael Madsen. This trailer made me want to pull my intestines out of my own anus and strangle myself with them.
Coming soon, Spiderman 3 by Uwe Boll.
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"We live in a country, where John Lennon takes six bullets in the chest, Yoko Ono was standing right next to him and not one fucking bullet! Explain that to me! Explain that to me, God! Explain it to me, God!" - Denis Leary summing up my feelings about the nature of the universe.
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NiX
Wiki Admin
Posts: 7770
Locomotive Pandamonium
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Coming soon, Spiderman 3 by Uwe Boll.
You filthy bastard! TAKE THAT BACK! |
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Abagadro
Terracotta Army
Posts: 12227
Possibly the only user with more posts in the Den than PC/Console Gaming.
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I'm just anxiously awaiting Dungeon Siege with bated breath.
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"As democracy is perfected, the office of president represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people. On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.”
-H.L. Mencken
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Polysorbate80
Terracotta Army
Posts: 2044
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The girl looks trailer park dumpy and not cool. She also looks like she is lost, not a viscious cold blooded killer. Did they even play the game before they raped it?
I was thinking "Alyson Hannigan with Down's Syndrome", myself |
“Why the fuck would you ... ?” is like 80% of the conversation with Poly — Chimpy
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WayAbvPar
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I'm just anxiously awaiting Dungeon Siege with bated breath.
Thank you for being the first person EVAR on the Internet to spell this correctly. Well, other than me =) |
When speaking of the MMOG industry, the glass may be half full, but it's full of urine. HaemishM
Always wear clean underwear because you never know when a Tory Government is going to fuck you.- Ironwood
Libertarians make fun of everyone because they can't see beyond the event horizons of their own assholes Surlyboi
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schild
Administrator
Posts: 60350
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I'm just anxiously awaiting Dungeon Siege with bated breath.
Thank you for being the first person EVAR on the Internet to spell this correctly. Well, other than me =) How the fuck else do you spell it? I've never seen anyone spell it wrong. |
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Signe
Terracotta Army
Posts: 18942
Muse.
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Most people say 'baited' breath. It's an old fisherman's joke... or muff divers joke... or something. I think.
Anyway, it's almost never spelled correctly.
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My Sig Image: hath rid itself of this mortal coil.
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Samwise
Moderator
Posts: 19323
sentient yeast infection
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Some of my other favorites are "bare with me for a second here" and "I'm going to pour over this and get back to you".
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Trippy
Administrator
Posts: 23657
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I'm just anxiously awaiting Dungeon Siege with bated breath.
I can sort of understand why Hollywood continues to give work to this guy -- with rentals and DVD sales these days even crappy low-budget movies can make at least some money for studios -- but why on earth would they allow this guy to direct a $60 million dollar movie? That's mind-boggling. |
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Arnold
Terracotta Army
Posts: 813
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Some of my other favorites are "bare with me for a second here" and "I'm going to pour over this and get back to you".
What about "galdang"? WTF? Or, "I don't want to hear any more of your dribble." |
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Furiously
Terracotta Army
Posts: 7199
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Loken signed up with him again?  ? |
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HaemishM
Staff Emeritus
Posts: 42666
the Confederate flag underneath the stone in my class ring
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I'm just anxiously awaiting Dungeon Siege with bated breath.
I can sort of understand why Hollywood continues to give work to this guy -- with rentals and DVD sales these days even crappy low-budget movies can make at least some money for studios -- but why on earth would they allow this guy to direct a $60 million dollar movie? That's mind-boggling. Ok, now THAT causes me physical pain. I LIKE Jason Statham, though he has been cast in some truly bad movies over here, and generally misused to the nth degree. But an UWE BOLL FLICK? BASED ON DUNGEON SIEGE, a derivative clone of a deriviative hack and slash game? GAHHHH FUCK ME! I eagerly await word that Dungeon Siege will be based in modern day San Francisco, and Statham will pack twin pistols of death that he carries on his pack mule name Paco. |
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Furiously
Terracotta Army
Posts: 7199
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Someday the limited edition Uwe Boll DVD director's cut collection of his films will go for big money on Ebay.
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Abagadro
Terracotta Army
Posts: 12227
Possibly the only user with more posts in the Den than PC/Console Gaming.
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I don't think "Hollywood" gives him any money (DS doesn't have a distributor for this reason). He executive produces most of this crap, so he likely gets most of his money directly from investors, likely in Germany. For some reason Germany provides MONUMENTAL tax advantages for producing films through German companies. I think these movies are all gigantic tax shelters. EDIT: Here is an article about the German tax shelters and how Hollywood also uses them to generate profits: http://www.slate.com/id/2117309 |
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« Last Edit: July 01, 2005, 11:28:27 AM by Abagadro »
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"As democracy is perfected, the office of president represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people. On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.”
-H.L. Mencken
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Shockeye
Staff Emeritus
Posts: 6668
Skinny-dippin' in a sea of Lee, I'd propose on bended knee...
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tax outhouses
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HaemishM
Staff Emeritus
Posts: 42666
the Confederate flag underneath the stone in my class ring
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Goddamn. Uwe Boll is nothing but a tax-fraud scheme?
LE BRILLANT!
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Simond
Terracotta Army
Posts: 6742
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That's certainly the most plausible explaination I've heard.
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"You're really a good person, aren't you? So, there's no path for you to take here. Go home. This isn't a place for someone like you."
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Samwise
Moderator
Posts: 19323
sentient yeast infection
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"So, in order for the scheme to work, we'd have to find a sure fire flop..."  |
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TheWalrus
Terracotta Army
Posts: 4321
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Isn't that from House of the Dead?
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vanilla folders - MediumHigh
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Jeff Kelly
Terracotta Army
Posts: 6921
I'm an apathetic, hedonistic, utilitarian, nihilistic existentialist.
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For some reason Germany provides MONUMENTAL tax advantages for producing films through German companies. I think these movies are all gigantic tax shelters. EDIT: Here is an article about the German tax shelters and how Hollywood also uses them to generate profits: http://www.slate.com/id/2117309Yeah, that was one of the many stupid decisions of our administration. They wanted to boost the german movie business by providing tax cuts to movie projects and by creating a movie fund for those projects. The law involved was so badly made that subsequently every fucking hollywood studio got money out of this fund and was tax exempt in germany if they used some kind of german-based production company. Look at the poster of some hollywood blockbuster, there is a good chance that you'll find the logo of the "Deutsche Filmförderfond" (german movie fund) This won't work any longer however because the law got scarpped. We have a certain breed of totally stupid politicians, they have great ideas (or at least what they themselves deem great) but the laws they make are so buggy that you can hear most lawyers in germany cringe with frustration. |
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AOFanboi
Terracotta Army
Posts: 935
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"So, in order for the scheme to work, we'd have to find a sure fire flop..." Ach, das Ironi! Then again, apparently this little gem is among the most popular UMD titles. Sony fans are incomprehensible sometimes. |
Current: Mario Kart DS, Nintendogs
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Trippy
Administrator
Posts: 23657
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« Last Edit: July 02, 2005, 03:00:49 AM by Trippy »
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Teleku
Terracotta Army
Posts: 10516
https://i.imgur.com/mcj5kz7.png
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Off of the IMDB page for Dungeon Siege:
Burt Reynolds .... King Konreid
Now how could this movie possibly be bad?
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"My great-grandfather did not travel across four thousand miles of the Atlantic Ocean to see this nation overrun by immigrants. He did it because he killed a man back in Ireland. That's the rumor."
-Stephen Colbert
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schild
Administrator
Posts: 60350
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Burt Reynolds .... King Konreid
Now how could this movie possibly be bad?
Directed by
sb.exe
Uwe Boll It's on the internet. It seems IMDB knows Uwe Bolls true form. |
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AOFanboi
Terracotta Army
Posts: 935
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Burt Reynolds .... King Konreid
Now how could this movie possibly be bad?
Dungeons and Dragons had Jeremy "The Mission" Irons in it. Just mentioning. See you forgot your sarcasm green. Then again Irons does tend to end up in not exactly art fare most of the time. Okay, how about Raul Julia in Streetfighter? Bob Hoskins in Super Mario Brothers? Tom Hanks and Anne Francis in this little stinker? |
Current: Mario Kart DS, Nintendogs
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WindupAtheist
Army of One
Posts: 7028
Badicalthon
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The Time Machine wasn't that bad. I actually thought the Goth morlock king Irons played was kinda cool, and should have been used for more than ten minutes.
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"You're just a dick who quotes himself in his sig." -- Schild
"Yeah, it's pretty awesome." -- Me
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Samwise
Moderator
Posts: 19323
sentient yeast infection
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Or, "I don't want to hear any more of your dribble."
Another one: "sorted past". |
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WindupAtheist
Army of One
Posts: 7028
Badicalthon
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Oh, my biggest complaint about Time Machine: A twenty megaton bomb blows the moon into chunks? Look up gravitational binding energy, assholes!
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"You're just a dick who quotes himself in his sig." -- Schild
"Yeah, it's pretty awesome." -- Me
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