Uhh... I just can't think up a headline for this.

[Shockeye]

Man Pulled From Women's Outhouse Tank
Teenager Reports Seeing Man's Face In Toilet

POSTED: 4:56 pm EDT June 28, 2005
UPDATED: 6:05 pm EDT June 28, 2005

ALBANY, N.H. -- A man is facing charges after police said they pulled him from a tank under a women's toilet that was filled with human waste.
   
Police said that Gary Moody, 45, was under a log cabin outhouse off the Kancamagas Highway in Albany.

"You can draw your own conclusions as to the conditions we encountered," said Capt. John Hebert, of the Carroll County Sheriff's Department.

Police said that they got a call from the parents of a teenage girl who said that when she went to use the facilities, she saw Moody's face staring back at her from the hole.

Moody was hosed off before police cuffed him.

"It's a very filthy environment, and before we put anybody in contact with him, we had to decontaminate him," Hebert said. "We treated him as if he were hazardous material."

Hikers using the outhouse on Tuesday said that the story was enough to make their stomachs turn.

"He just must be sick to put yourself in that muck. Disgusting," said Harriett Voysey, of New Jersey.

Police said they don't know how long Moody was in the tank, but they said the door to it was locked, which means he must have gone in through the toilet. They said they don't know why he was there.

"I started this business in 1980, and I have never in my career encountered anybody in this type of situation," Hebert said.

Police charged Moody with criminal trespass, and they said he could face more charges. He is out on bail and due back in court next month.

[WayAbvPar]

Headline-"Sick fuck in deep shit".

[Riggswolfe]

Um...ok. I can't think of a single thing to say.

[SurfD]

....... They said they don't know why he was there........

Say WHAT?   I mean, how fucking CLUELESS could you POSSIBLY be?

[Shockeye]

He Fell Into A Ring Of Mire
Man caught under women's latrine says he was hunting lost jewelry

JULY 6--The Maine man recently discovered hiding in a sewage-filled chamber below an outhouse told cops that he dropped his wedding ring into the women's room toilet and simply climbed in to retrieve it. Gary Moody, 45, was arrested after a "female entered the restroom and saw a man down in the 'vault' looking up at her." According to this fabulous investigative report--which was today released to TSG--Moody told cops that he was "changing his clothes" in a New Hampshire park's loo when the ring headed south. Moody claimed that he then "climbed down through the hole and when he was searching for the ring" someone else came into the room. Moody said he was embarrassed, so he tried to hide in the filthy space. Asked why he was in the women's bathroom in the first place, Moody replied that, "the men's room was busy." He did not have a handy explanation, however, for why he did not just tell a park ranger about the supposedly missing ring. Charged with misdemeanor disorderly conduct, Moody is scheduled for a July 19 appearance in District Court. We're aiming to get a cleaner copy of his mug shot (a crappy version of the image is on page five of the police report), since we know America wants to put a face on the begrimed bottom dweller. (7 pages)

[WayAbvPar]

Man caught under women's latrine says he was hunting lost jewelry

Yeah, he was trying to find rings. O-rings, I am guessing.

[Shockeye]

Man caught under women's latrine says he was hunting lost jewelry

Yeah, he was trying to find rings. O-rings, I am guessing.

That is so wrong. That's 1 demerit.

[SurfD]

We're aiming to get a cleaner copy of his mug shot (a crappy version of the image is on page five of the police report)....

Groan......