Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
August 02, 2025, 10:14:50 AM

Login with username, password and session length

Search:     Advanced search
we're back, baby
*
Home Help Search Login Register
f13.net  |  f13.net General Forums  |  General Discussion  |  Serious Business  |  Topic: I'll carve off what I want and ride the rest home. 0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.
Pages: [1] Go Down Print
Author Topic: I'll carve off what I want and ride the rest home.  (Read 1611 times)
Shockeye
Staff Emeritus
Posts: 6668

Skinny-dippin' in a sea of Lee, I'd propose on bended knee...


WWW
on: March 31, 2005, 01:28:19 PM

Quote from: The Patriot News
Police save calf from backyard barbecue
Residents intended to eat it, chief says
Thursday, March 31, 2005
BY THEODORE DECKER
Of The Patriot-News

Harrisburg police collared a calf on Kittatinny Street yesterday, saving it from a date with a city family's dinner table, authorities say.

Harrisburg Bureau of Police Chief Charles G. Kellar said officers were called yesterday morning to the hardscrabble urban neighborhood in south Allison Hill for a report of a calf confined in a small, enclosed yard.

Neighbors complained that the animal had been mooing all night.

Police found the calf tethered in a back yard in the 1200 block of Kittatinny Street, awaiting slaughter by its owners, Kellar said.

Kellar said the family who lives in the home told police that they had bought the animal at an auction the day before.

"I guess they brought it home [Tuesday] in an SUV," he said. "They bought it to eat it."

Harrisburg spokesman Randy King said a city ordinance outlines the requirements someone must meet before keeping farm animals within city limits.

The ordinance prohibits keeping even one farm animal on less than roughly 1.5 acres of land.

One animal also would require a pen of at least 1,600 square feet that is at least 100 feet from any road or property line. Additional animals require more space, said King.

"There are few locations in the city that could satisfy the requirements of the ordinance," King said.

The tiny yard on Kittatinny Street clearly fell short of the requirements, so police took the calf into custody. The owners could be fined.

The animal's ultimate fate was not immediately clear. Kellar suspected it would end up in an environment more suitable for livestock than Kittatinny Street.

"It's a residential area," the chief said. "We certainly don't want people bringing cows home and butchering them in the back yard. That would also probably be a health issue."
HaemishM
Staff Emeritus
Posts: 42666

the Confederate flag underneath the stone in my class ring


WWW
Reply #1 on: April 01, 2005, 08:07:21 AM

What the fuck kind of backwoods redneck buys a LIVE FUCKING CALF to slaughter? I mean, shit, if you don't like grocery store meat, maybe you should visit a fucking butcher shop, where they can give you an entire side of beef for a lot less hassle. They'll even do the trimmings and all for you.

WayAbvPar
Moderator
Posts: 19270


Reply #2 on: April 01, 2005, 09:20:19 AM

But you can't shag a steak before you eat it. Well, I guess you could...

When speaking of the MMOG industry, the glass may be half full, but it's full of urine. HaemishM

Always wear clean underwear because you never know when a Tory Government is going to fuck you.- Ironwood

Libertarians make fun of everyone because they can't see beyond the event horizons of their own assholes Surlyboi
Furiously
Terracotta Army
Posts: 7199


WWW
Reply #3 on: April 01, 2005, 09:25:37 AM

You've never roasted a calf? It's good eats.

Pages: [1] Go Up Print 
f13.net  |  f13.net General Forums  |  General Discussion  |  Serious Business  |  Topic: I'll carve off what I want and ride the rest home.  
Jump to:  

Powered by SMF 1.1.10 | SMF © 2006-2009, Simple Machines LLC