Today's "Torment schild" News

[Shockeye]

Whedon is "Wonder Woman's" Man
Dateline: Thursday, March 17, 2005

By: NEWS EDITOR
Source: Variety

It's official. Joss Whedon has been hired by Warner Bros. and Silver Pictures to write and direct the new "Wonder Woman" feature film.

Joel Silver and Leonard Goldberg will produce the film which is of course based on the DC Comics character created by William Moulton Marston.

No cast has been named yet.

[HaemishM]

Sweet. Other than Joel Silver being drawn to produce it. I think Whedon will do a good job.

[schild]

I don't give a shit about Wonder Woman or Joss Whedon. This is great since it gets both out of my hair.

[Fargull]

You have hair?  From all the bald avatars, I thought that was conveying something.

Woot, go Whedon.  Something else to look forward to on the movie front.

[schild]

Not only do I have hair, but I have hair that would look like John Stamos' if I'd ever grow it out.

[Paelos]

Not only do I have hair, but I have hair that would look like John Stamos' if I'd ever grow it out.

You lie, nobody can best teh STAMOS!

[schild]

My god, it's full of stars.

[MaceVanHoffen]

This thread is about to go to The Bad Place.  I will help it along, because helping is what I do.  I'm a helper.

[Abagadro]

It appears his hair is so incredible it generates its own electrical field.

[Signe]

[eldaec]

Now that's no good at all.

That's a domestic beard trimmer. For trimming weedy looking student beards.

Probably not much good beyond a goatee.

You'll be wanting a bigger calibre device for cutting into a mane like the one above.

[MaceVanHoffen]

Do not attempt to assuage your inner demons with such benign imagery.  Oh, you may struggle and resist.  But you cannot prevent the slow decay into vaguely homoerotic hair fetishism that this thread will become.  MUST become.

[Signe]

[schild]

Marijuana is not a drug. I used to suck dick for coke. Now that's an addiction. You ever suck some dick for marijuana?

[Shockeye]

Did someone say coke?

[schild]

Whoever did the photoshop really shouldn't have hit them with a shovel first.

[Signe]

I have no idea what any of this means or who the people in those last pics are... well, the one I posted was Mrs. Stamos...

Why am I so out of touch?  Why do I not recognise all these celebritiess like you people do?  I watch TV too, but you wouldn't know it by my confusion in these celeb threads!

I give up.  I will never be as cool as you lot.   

[schild]

I give up.  I will never be as cool as you lot.   

I don't care where you say you were living in the 80s. But since you haven't seen Full House, I would only believe it was a hole. 

[Shockeye]

I give up.  I will never be as cool as you lot.   

I don't care where you say you were living in the 80s. But since you haven't seen Full House, I would only believe it was a hole. 

Saddam was in a hole and I think even he had TV and a high celebrity recognition factor.

[Signe]

I don't care where you say you were living in the 80s. But since you haven't seen Full House, I would only believe it was a hole.

Saddam was in a hole and I think even he had TV and a high celebrity recognition factor.

Cheers.  I feel so much better now.

[Ironwood]

Love the Avatar signe.  Really.

[Signe]

I gave myself an award because my respect level is dipping worse than usual and I seem to be losing my street cred. 

Also, because I am always reminded of cheesy poofs when I play f13.

[Ironwood]

Actually, I applaud you for not knowing half the geeky shit that comes off in these forums.  Most of it slips neatly over my head too.

[Paelos]

Actually, I applaud you for not knowing half the geeky shit that comes off in these forums.  Most of it slips neatly over my head too.

For now. Soon, soon you will all be mired knee deep in the nerdery. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! 

[HaemishM]

I give up.  I will never be as cool as you lot.   

I don't care where you say you were living in the 80s. But since you haven't seen Full House, I would only believe it was a hole. 

Saddam was in a hole and I think even he had TV and a high celebrity recognition factor.

I betcha he could at least recognize Sean Penn.

[Signe]

I think I was just too busy in the 80s to watch kids tv.  I think I may have been mostly drunk or something. 

Now for some scary news:

The other day I made a mistake and clicked the wrong item when doing my grocery shopping.  Yesterday, the delivery man presented me with Grapples instead of grapes.  A grapple is a fruit that looks just like an apple and allegedly tastes like a grape.  It smells very perfumey.  I've never heard of this fruit before.  Things like this scare me.   :-( 

Evidently, it's a Frankenfruit.

[WayAbvPar]

To rerail this temporarily-
I wonder if Charisma Carpenter will get to play WW? She has the <ahem> attributes...

[HaemishM]

From what I've heard, the chick who plays Ray Romano's wife on "Everybody Loves Raymond" already has the part.

But we all know that if Lucy Lawless isn't doing it, they cast the wrong woman.

[WayAbvPar]

From what I've heard, the chick who plays Ray Romano's wife on "Everybody Loves Raymond" already has the part.

But we all know that if Lucy Lawless isn't doing it, they cast the wrong woman.

You are joking, right? She is like 5 feet tall! She is also lacking in the Wonders that put the wonder in Wonder Woman, I tell you.

[stray]

From what I've heard, the chick who plays Ray Romano's wife on "Everybody Loves Raymond" already has the part.

But we all know that if Lucy Lawless isn't doing it, they cast the wrong woman.

You are joking, right? She is like 5 feet tall! She is also lacking in the Wonders that put the wonder in Wonder Woman, I tell you.

Umm, actually, she's pretty "well endowed". That's about the only thing that makes me stop and watch Everybody Loves Raymond from time to time.

[schild]

From what I've heard, the chick who plays Ray Romano's wife on "Everybody Loves Raymond" already has the part.

But we all know that if Lucy Lawless isn't doing it, they cast the wrong woman.

You are joking, right? She is like 5 feet tall! She is also lacking in the Wonders that put the wonder in Wonder Woman, I tell you.

Umm, actually, she's pretty "well endowed".

He's talking about Lucy Lawless. Who is pretty well not endowed.



And ohmygodwhocares. This is Wonder Women we're talking about. Honestly, this movie can't not be flaming turds. It will be terrible, terrible, terrible. Not nearly as bad as Mystery Men though.

[HaemishM]

I can't find anything on it, but the wife seems to think that Constance Marie (George Lopez's wife on the George Lopez show) is going to be instead of Heaton. I don't know where I thought I saw the story about Heaton.

And yes, Heaton is stacked, Lucy is not that stacked, but Lawless just fits the part better than anyone, IMO. Now whether she'd do it, couldn't tell you.

[stray]

And ohmygodwhocares.

Good point.

[WayAbvPar]

I can't find anything on it, but the wife seems to think that Constance Marie (George Lopez's wife on the George Lopez show) is going to be instead of Heaton. I don't know where I thought I saw the story about Heaton.

And yes, Heaton is stacked, Lucy is not that stacked, but Lawless just fits the part better than anyone, IMO. Now whether she'd do it, couldn't tell you.

Heaton isn't really stacked- her boobs have just been inflated numerous times as she spits out kid after kid (she has like a half dozen). Those things would hit the floor the second any support was removed.

[HaemishM]

Thank God the Bra Industry?