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Author Topic: mother!  (Read 908 times)
schild
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on: September 15, 2017, 09:42:49 AM

I haven't seen this yet, but it sounds like Aronofsky wanted his Lars von Trier or Gaspar Noe moment. This movie has been very heavily spoiled for me.

I have no clue if it's as painful to watch as Irreversible or the more horrific parts of Requiem for a Dream, but it really sounds like he wasn't looking to make Pi again.
TheWalrus
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Reply #1 on: September 15, 2017, 11:32:34 AM

Will not watch this out of spite. The trailers don't even give me a hint as to what this shitshow is about, so I refuse to give them the satisfaction. Fuck this movie.

Paelos: Somebody find that post where I declared Seattle dead, because those fuckers are NFL cockroaches in the NFC.
HaemishM
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Reply #2 on: September 15, 2017, 03:28:13 PM

The trailers just make me think of try hard pretentious Oscar bait masquerading as horror, or some kind of Lynchian tone poem where everything involved is in love with the smell of their own farts, like Lost Highway.

schild
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Reply #3 on: September 15, 2017, 03:31:03 PM

The trailers don't even TOUCH on what the fuck is going on in this movie.
Amarr HM
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Reply #4 on: September 15, 2017, 04:09:26 PM

So it wasn't just me.

I'm going to escape, come back, wipe this place off the face of the Earth, obliterate it and you with it.
HaemishM
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Reply #5 on: September 15, 2017, 04:14:44 PM

I just read a spoiler article about this movie.


Trippy
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Reply #6 on: September 15, 2017, 04:28:22 PM

More like:


Khaldun
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Reply #7 on: September 15, 2017, 05:09:13 PM

As I understand it, it's essentially trying to make you nope-nope with overtly offensive art-house pretentiousness dialed up to 11, but I have to say I can't get past that to say, "Oh maybe there's something interesting happening on the back end of the hah-hah you thought this was pretentious" presentation. I suffered through three Peter Greenaway movies some time ago and that cured me forever of that kind of doubled schtick.
schild
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Reply #8 on: September 15, 2017, 05:35:49 PM

they snap a baby's neck

I"ve seen a Serbian film. The spoilers for mother! actually sound worse (in terms of pure awfulness).

Mildly Unpopular Opinion: A Serbian Film is actually a good piece of cinema. I do not believe mother! will be, and I love Aronofsky even though it's all been downhill since Pi.
Selby
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Reply #9 on: September 15, 2017, 08:17:40 PM

The other half wanted to go see this tonight.  She showed me the trailer.  In my limited opinion it made the movie look like Rosemary's Baby with other random strange shit going on. Since I can't imagine anyone remaking that and I walked away with zero clue as to what it's REALLY about, I vetoed it.  Reading what I've read here tonight makes me feel like I made the right choice.
schild
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Reply #10 on: September 15, 2017, 08:55:09 PM

I hope you saw it instead.
Khaldun
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Reply #11 on: September 16, 2017, 06:09:07 PM

Got an F from CinemaScore.
Der Helm
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Reply #12 on: September 17, 2017, 03:22:31 PM

Oh boy, I just read the wikipedia article. What a pretentious piece of shit.

"I've been done enough around here..."- Signe
schild
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Reply #13 on: September 18, 2017, 08:57:08 AM

HaemishM
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Reply #14 on: September 18, 2017, 09:41:31 AM

Goddamnit, that is probably better written than the entire movie and HOLY SHIT is this movie super pretentious.

Sir T
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Reply #15 on: September 18, 2017, 12:15:53 PM

Its been removed. DAMN YOU MOTHER!

"I think its pretty troubling when a backyard decoration comes out swinging harder against Nazis than the President of the United States." Stephen Colbert
schild
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Reply #16 on: September 18, 2017, 01:37:12 PM

Its been removed. DAMN YOU MOTHER!

Quote
"alright, so think about it like this.

Javier Bardem is god.

Jennifer Lawrence is mother earth.

The movie starts, she wakes up. Sheís like yo whereís this motherfucker at?

She goes outside and there ainít shit as far as you can see. No people, no houses, nothing, just grass and shit. This is the earth pre-human civilization.
he pops up behind her and sheís like what are you up to and heís like nothing, just working on some shit, itís nothing. But you know heís up to some shit. (By the way, heís a poet in the movie.) Sheís like ok, iím just gonna keep working on the house (which represents physical earth and is an extension of mother earth herself).

All of a sudden, boom. Some dude arrives. This is adam.

Mother earth is like yo what the fuck is this, god? This is our shit, we built this, you canít just bring someone else in on our shit.

God is like, nah itís cool, trust me. Sheís like ok i guess.

All of a sudden, god & adam are super close. God is like yo adam, i made you and adam is like bro lol thatís dope, yo whatís that crystal thing? God is like you canít touch it, itís mine, i made that from the last time i destroyed everything. This is the forbidden fruit.

Then a little while later, mother earth walks in on adam puking in the toilet after a night of drinks with god and she sees heís got a nasty ass wound right on his ribs. This is adamís rib that god used to create eve.

Sure enough, next day, boom, eve is here. Mother earth is like yo wtf, thereís another one!? And god is like yeah, itís cool, just chill.

And eve is a conniving bitch too. Sheís like oh man, this is a nice place, show me around, sike, iím gonna go up here to this office and mother earth is like you can never go in there! This is the garden of eden.

Mother earth is like yo god, i told you i donít like these people, i want them out of here, this is my shit. And god is still like no iím telling you, itís cool, they got nowhere else to go.

Then one day, smash you hear some glass break and what do you know, itís that crystal. And who broke it? Fucking adam and eve of course. God runs in and is like wtf i told yall not to touch it, everybody get the fuck out. Then he boards the room up thus banishing adam and eve from the garden of eden.

Right when theyíre about to leave, all of a sudden their two sons come busting in the house. Thatís cain and abel.

Mother earth is like wtf, they have kids too!? And god is like itís cool, iíll take care of this.

Cain is like yo dad what the fuck youíre leaving everything in your will to abel, what about me? And abel is like you suck bro, iím dadís favorite. Cain is like shut the fuck up abel, iím gonna kill you and abel is like nah. God comes in and heís like cain, you need to chill bro. Cain is like okÖ sike, iím gonna kill this motherfucker and proceeds to bash his head in with a doorknob.

Cain takes off into the wilderness to become a restless wanderer. God and adam and eve take abel to the hospital.

Then god and adam and eve come back and tell mother earth that abelís dead then all these other people show up out of nowhere to mourn his death.

They start tearing shit up. Theyíre breaking shit left and right and thereís this one sink in the kitchen they keep sitting on. Mother earth is like yíall better get off that shit i swear to god and theyíre like nah and the sink breaks. Water starts spraying everywhere and mother earth is like yo everyone get the FUCK out of my house. This is the great flood. Everybody is gone.

Then god and mother earth start arguing. Sheís like why do you keep allowing people in our house and heís like this is my house too and these are my fans and they love my poetry. Sheís like oh yeah, you wanna create some shit? How about you fuck me for once (DAMN) and weíll create some beautiful shit. Heís like i got you.

They start making out on the stairs and then we cut to the next scene and theyíre in bed and sheís like iím pregnant. Heís like lol wat, we just fucked last night. And sheís like yeah but i know. Heís like dope, weíre gonna have a baby. This is the immaculate conception of jesus.

Heís all happy and sheís like cool, well iím gonna start cleaning up the apocalypse in the kitchen. Thatís called foreshadowing, kids.

So now we fast forward and mother earth is pregnant and sheís nesting for the baby and shit. While sheís doing that, god is like man iím feeling inspired and he starts writing again. Sheís like whatever, iím not gonna bother you then. Then heís like iím done and she reads it and sheís like itís beautiful. Then his publisher shows up (and itís kristen wiig wtf) and mother earth is like what the fuck is she doing here and god is like she read it and she loved it. And mother earth is like how the fuck did she read it already, we donít even have internet but god is like nah, chill.

Time to buckle up because this is where shit starts getting crazy.

Now all these people are showing up at the house and theyíre like god, we love your work. We idolize you, we just want you to touch us. This is the start of christianity (or really most religions).

Mother earth is like wtf, no god, donít let them in here but god is like nah, theyíre my fans, i gotta share my shit with them. But these fans are nuts and theyíre eating all of mother earthís food and ripping up the house and taking anything that may have been touched by god. But god is still like ahh, i love these people and they love me and it feels awesome. Mother earth is like wtf god, iím pregnant with your kid, thatís not enough for you?

But now these people are getting downright fucking nuts. Theyíre fighting over shit and killing each other. KRISTEN WIIG IS SHOOTING MOTHERFUCKERS EXECUTION STYLE IN THE BACK OF THE HEAD.

Sheís like is it hot in here or is it just me? lol global warming.

Riot police show up, people start blowing shit up, all of a sudden people are locked in cages and shit is just going absolutely bananas.

While all of this is going on, mother earth is going into labor. Sheís crawling through the house trying to find god but she keeps running into crazier and crazier shit.

Finally god comes and heís like oh shit, letís get you somewhere safe and he drags her through the crowd and breaks open the doors to the garden of eden, takes her in there and barricades them inside.

Shit is still going nuts outside while sheís giving birth. Sheís screaming loud as fuck and then boom, baby pops out. God is like itís a boy (cuz itís jesus) and all of a sudden everything outside gets silent.

Mother earth is like why the fuck is it so quiet out there? God is like theyíre just waiting to see the baby. They brought us gifts and itís a bunch of fruit and blankets and shit.

Then god is like let me hold him. Mother earth is like no, i know what youíre up to. God is like thatís my kid, let me hold him and mother earth is like FUCK NO go away. Then they just go into an epic staredown. Theyíre staring at each other for like three days while she holds jesus. Apparently he didnít need to shit or pee or anything.

Then finally mother earth loses the staring contest and dozes off for literally like a second and wakes up and jesus is gone.

She runs outside and god is holding up jesus and the crowd is going nuts. She goes to grab jesus but itís too late, god already passed him into the crowd.

Jesus is being passed around and is unleashing three days worth of pee on the crowd. Iím not kidding, heís literally peeing into the crowd and they love it.

Mother earth is running through the crowd trying to catch her baby. Baby jesus is just crowdsurfing and pissing everywhere when all of a sudden HIS NECK FUCKING SNAPS.
THAT SHIT WAS FUCKING CRAZY.

Mother earth is like WTF YOU KILLED MY SON. and theyíre like weíre sorry but he died for us and they start FUCKING EATING BABY JESUS.

God is like no baby, it was an accident, we have to forgive them. Mother earth is like fuck all you motherfuckers and she runs to the basement. Sheís had it up to here with this shit.

She grabs a lighter and an axe and goes up to this big ass tank of oil and hits it with the axe and spills oil everywhere. God comes running down and heís like no donít do it, these are my people, i love you. And mother earth is like you donít love me, you only love that i love you. And she sets the fucking house on fire. The motherfucking apocalypse.

The whole house pretty much bursts into flames, everyone inside dies, the house explodes and you see mother earthís face literally burning as she sheds a tear.

Cut to the next scene, and thereís smug ass god standing there in perfect condition (you know, because heís god and nothing hurts him). He picks mother earth up out of the ashes and sheís barely breathing.

Sheís like iím dead and heís like wait i need one more thing. And sheís like motherfucker i gave you everything and now iím dying. Heís like i need your heart and sheís like ok i guess, i donít need it anymore. So he digs into her chest, pulls her heart out, she dies, then he squeezes her heart and it becomes that crystal thing that was the forbidden fruit.

Next scene, mother earth wakes up and sheís like yo, whereís this motherfucker at? But itís not jennifer lawrence. End of movie.

tl;dr god is a self-righteous prick and accidentally destroys earth but itís cool because he can just make another one. "
pxib
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Reply #17 on: September 18, 2017, 01:46:08 PM

HOLY SHIT is this movie super pretentious.
What part of "written, produced, and directed by Darren Aronofsky" don't you understand?

ďAll of humanity's problems stem from man's inability to sit quietly in a room alone.Ē - Pascal
HaemishM
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Reply #18 on: September 18, 2017, 02:50:53 PM

I like Arnofsky for the most part (though I couldn't make it 20 minutes into Black Swan). This, however, looks like he's taking lessons from Paul Anderson on how to be a pretentious toolbag.

pxib
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Reply #19 on: September 18, 2017, 05:35:32 PM

Hey I like Aronofsky, too, but the guy has always been a pretentious toolbag.

ďAll of humanity's problems stem from man's inability to sit quietly in a room alone.Ē - Pascal
Selby
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Reply #20 on: September 18, 2017, 08:39:47 PM

Well that sounds awful.
Raph
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Title delayed while we "find the fun."


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Reply #21 on: September 19, 2017, 03:22:36 PM

Seems like every review of this I read has a different theory. Saw one yesterday that said it was about the ways in which women are exploited by society. Saw another which said it was about creativity and the price of fame.
Ironwood
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Reply #22 on: September 19, 2017, 03:36:21 PM

I've seen many that say 'this is shite'.


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schild
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Reply #23 on: September 19, 2017, 03:58:06 PM

Seems like every review of this I read has a different theory. Saw one yesterday that said it was about the ways in which women are exploited by society. Saw another which said it was about creativity and the price of fame.

it's the bible

it's not even a theory
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Reply #24 on: September 19, 2017, 04:08:32 PM

Its almost as if every since she complained about being under paid female actor she's been staring in progressively shittier movies.

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Ruvaldt
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Reply #25 on: September 19, 2017, 04:45:00 PM

Seems like every review of this I read has a different theory. Saw one yesterday that said it was about the ways in which women are exploited by society. Saw another which said it was about creativity and the price of fame.

it's the bible

it's not even a theory

Yeah, it's the bible.  

It's also about the creative process/creation of art, which Aronofsky is equating to godliness.  It's extremely heavy handed as an allegory for both of these things.  In fact, I'm tempted to not even call it allegory for the creation of art because Bardem's character is literally a poet creating a work of literature.  It's insufferably pretentious.

"For a long time now I have tried simply to write the best I can. Sometimes I have good luck and write better than I can." - Ernest Hemingway
Samwise
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Reply #26 on: September 19, 2017, 04:58:57 PM

It's *literally* the creation of art and *allegorically* the Biblical creation story.


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Soulflame
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Reply #27 on: September 19, 2017, 08:31:53 PM

Archer isn't wrong.

Well.  So far as I am aware.
Tale
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sıɥʇ ǝʞıן sʞןɐʇ


Reply #28 on: September 19, 2017, 09:14:44 PM

Seems like every review of this I read has a different theory. Saw one yesterday that said it was about the ways in which women are exploited by society. Saw another which said it was about creativity and the price of fame.

It's actually supposed to be about Earth/nature and our abuse of it, told with biblical allegories.

"The more we talk about less important things, the less we talk about more important things."
MahrinSkel
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Reply #29 on: September 19, 2017, 09:18:53 PM

It's supposed to be the director staring up his own butthole. Any deeper analysis is just joining him in admiring the view.

--Dave

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lamaros
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Reply #30 on: September 19, 2017, 10:02:17 PM

As I understand it, it's essentially trying to make you nope-nope with overtly offensive art-house pretentiousness dialed up to 11, but I have to say I can't get past that to say, "Oh maybe there's something interesting happening on the back end of the hah-hah you thought this was pretentious" presentation. I suffered through three Peter Greenaway movies some time ago and that cured me forever of that kind of doubled schtick.


The Draughtsman's Contract was alright.

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schild
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Reply #31 on: September 19, 2017, 10:10:08 PM

As I understand it, it's essentially trying to make you nope-nope with overtly offensive art-house pretentiousness dialed up to 11, but I have to say I can't get past that to say, "Oh maybe there's something interesting happening on the back end of the hah-hah you thought this was pretentious" presentation. I suffered through three Peter Greenaway movies some time ago and that cured me forever of that kind of doubled schtick.

The Draughtsman's Contract was alright.
The Falls is one of the best mockumentaries ever made, if not the best.
Soln
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the opportunity for evil is just delicious


Reply #32 on: September 19, 2017, 10:16:35 PM

As I understand it, it's essentially trying to make you nope-nope with overtly offensive art-house pretentiousness dialed up to 11, but I have to say I can't get past that to say, "Oh maybe there's something interesting happening on the back end of the hah-hah you thought this was pretentious" presentation. I suffered through three Peter Greenaway movies some time ago and that cured me forever of that kind of doubled schtick.

The Draughtsman's Contract was alright.
The Falls is one of the best mockumentaries ever made, if not the best.

I really liked Prospero's Books.  And Pi is the only Aranofsky I liked.
schild
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Reply #33 on: September 19, 2017, 10:48:14 PM

Pi is thus far the only Aronofsky movie that holds up to repeated viewings. And holy shit the soundtrack.
Sir T
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Reply #34 on: September 20, 2017, 12:16:49 PM

This is like staring at an Anus and saying "this is an allegory of free market capitalism."

"I think its pretty troubling when a backyard decoration comes out swinging harder against Nazis than the President of the United States." Stephen Colbert
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