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Topic: Have no fear, Uri Geller is here! (Read 2815 times)
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Shockeye
Staff Emeritus
Posts: 6668
Skinny-dippin' in a sea of Lee, I'd propose on bended knee...
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Psychic offers aid to cursed cityFrom correspondents in London March 09, 2005 From: Reuters SPOON-bending Israeli psychic Uri Geller has offered to single-handedly save a northern English city that many residents believe has been cursed. The people of the city of Carlisle on the Scottish border say the recent inscription on a large lump of polished granite of an ancient curse has brought down on their heads floods, pestilence and sporting humiliation. "I have offered to take the stone off their hands, put it in my garden and exorcise it," Geller told Reuters. "The Domesday book records an ancient healing centre in my village and all the ley lines converge on my garden." Carlisle councillor Jim Tootle insists that the "Cursing Stone" – inscribed with a 16th century curse against robbers, blackmailers and highwaymen – be destroyed or removed. Since its installation in 2001 in one of the city's museums, misfortune has plagued the city. Livestock herds were wiped out by foot-and-mouth disease, there has been a devastating flood, factories have closed, a boy was murdered in a local bakery and Carlisle United soccer team dropped a league. Geller was sanguine over how the residents of his small village of Sonning-on-Thames about an hour west of London would take the arrival of the curse if Carlisle council takes him up on his offer. "I believe the curse can be exorcised. I will use my pendulum and cleanse the stone of any evil forces. After that I would like to keep it in my garden. It is a work of art," he said. |
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MaceVanHoffen
Terracotta Army
Posts: 527
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The Scottish should really just stick to making Scotch, making beer, and invading the English. Things make a lot more sense when you're invading the English.
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WayAbvPar
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Hopefully James Randi will show up and piss on the lot of them.
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When speaking of the MMOG industry, the glass may be half full, but it's full of urine. HaemishM
Always wear clean underwear because you never know when a Tory Government is going to fuck you.- Ironwood
Libertarians make fun of everyone because they can't see beyond the event horizons of their own assholes Surlyboi
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Abagadro
Terracotta Army
Posts: 12227
Possibly the only user with more posts in the Den than PC/Console Gaming.
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They just need to sacrifice a male Bundy.
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"As democracy is perfected, the office of president represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people. On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.”
-H.L. Mencken
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Sky
Terracotta Army
Posts: 32117
I love my TV an' hug my TV an' call it 'George'.
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There is no spoon.
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Ironwood
Terracotta Army
Posts: 28240
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The Scottish should really just stick to making Scotch, making beer, and invading the English. Things make a lot more sense when you're invading the English.
Shut the fuck up you stupid wanker. Oh, and re-read it please, you douche. Note the interesting 'Northern English Town.' Now go and fuck yourself. You C*nt. (Ahhh, it's good to release your inner Scot sometime. And then get banned for it....) |
"Mr Soft Owl has Seen Some Shit." - Sun Tzu
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Paelos
Contributor
Posts: 27075
Error 404: Title not found.
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If we started banning Scots or people with Scottish tempers, we'd all be in the sin bin eventually.
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CPA, CFO, Sports Fan, Game when I have the time
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HaemishM
Staff Emeritus
Posts: 42666
the Confederate flag underneath the stone in my class ring
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If we started banning Scots-like behaviour, I'm sure I'd be the first merry kilt-waver shoved out the airlock. And that story must not have been written by a true Englishmen. Because if it had been, this would have been in bold letters, probably even in the headline. Carlisle United soccer team dropped a league. [/size] |
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MaceVanHoffen
Terracotta Army
Posts: 527
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The Scottish should really just stick to making Scotch, making beer, and invading the English. Things make a lot more sense when you're invading the English.
Shut the fuck up you stupid wanker. Oh, and re-read it please, you douche. Note the interesting 'Northern English Town.' Now go and fuck yourself. You C*nt. (Ahhh, it's good to release your inner Scot sometime. And then get banned for it....) LOL ... I totally thought Carlisle was in Scotland prior to reading the article, hence I zoned out on the location. You may now send the kilt-wearing hordes to descend upon me. |
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