schild
Administrator
Posts: 60345
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« Last Edit: July 23, 2013, 04:16:47 PM by Samwise »
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Salamok
Terracotta Army
Posts: 2803
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Good stuff but you posted 2 part 3's and tracking down part 4 on my mobile is too painful.
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Samwise
Moderator
Posts: 19223
sentient yeast infection
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I fixed the OP.  |
"I have not actually recommended many games, and I'll go on the record here saying my track record is probably best in the industry." - schild
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schild
Administrator
Posts: 60345
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My bad.
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Samwise
Moderator
Posts: 19223
sentient yeast infection
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Just finished reading.  |
"I have not actually recommended many games, and I'll go on the record here saying my track record is probably best in the industry." - schild
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Numtini
Terracotta Army
Posts: 7675
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Ok, I'll stop bitching about old lady perfume and keyboards covered in cheap hand lotion.
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If you can read this, you're on a board populated by misogynist assholes.
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Yegolev
Moderator
Posts: 24440
2/10 WOULD NOT INGEST
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Supposing this is even half true, I'm glad to have avoided workstation support. Seems a tad dramatized, though.
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Why am I homeless? Why do all you motherfuckers need homes is the real question.
They called it The Prayer, its answer was law
Mommy come back 'cause the water's all gone
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schild
Administrator
Posts: 60345
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Well, it is Australia. They have spiders the size of Jupiter out there, I hear.
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Trippy
Administrator
Posts: 23621
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True story. I worked in the computer department at the university bookstore while at school. One day somebody brought in a keyboard that had stopped working. Turns out their cat had peed on it.
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Fabricated
Moderator
Posts: 8978
~Living the Dream~
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shitthatneverhappened.txt
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"The world is populated in the main by people who should not exist." - George Bernard Shaw
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Merusk
Terracotta Army
Posts: 27449
Badge Whore
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Supposing this is even half true, I'm glad to have avoided workstation support. Seems a tad dramatized, though.
On reddit in the "Fuck Fat People" forum? Surely you jest! |
The past cannot be changed. The future is yet within your power.
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Yegolev
Moderator
Posts: 24440
2/10 WOULD NOT INGEST
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I've been reading made-up things on the internet for a long, long time.
I did work with someone that was very fat and disgusting. She was fat because she was disgusting, not the other way around. She had the record for dropping pagers into a toilet. Shit her pants at work once and didn't go home.
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Why am I homeless? Why do all you motherfuckers need homes is the real question.
They called it The Prayer, its answer was law
Mommy come back 'cause the water's all gone
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IainC
Developers
Posts: 6538
Wargaming.net
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Supposing this is even half true, I'm glad to have avoided workstation support. Seems a tad dramatized, though.
On reddit in the "Fuck Fat People" forum? Surely you jest! Fuck Fat People + BOFH = Redditporn |
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Hammond
Terracotta Army
Posts: 637
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Dear god if even half that story is true what a clusterfuck. I have done desktop / phone support for years and have never had to deal with something like that. Sure I get the typical stuck keyboard but my lord..
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Salamok
Terracotta Army
Posts: 2803
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When I was doing IT for small business I just made it a standard practice to chuck out the keyboard/mouse whenever we had employee churn, found enough of them that were truly disgusting to convince the boss that an extra $50 cost associated with hiring a new person wasn't unreasonable. Also, I have not been in an IT shop yet that was not swimming in extra keyboards (and usually mice), the story may be true and the subject may have been deserving of ridicule but this IT person was being a dick from the get go (probably justified by the 20 "URGENT" emails over the weekend opener).
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Kitsune
Terracotta Army
Posts: 2406
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That's where the story falls apart, though. The lazy, disability-abusing employee, worked up about not being able to work over the weekend? Why would a woman who wasn't working during the week go crazy about her computer on a weekend?
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Yegolev
Moderator
Posts: 24440
2/10 WOULD NOT INGEST
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Whoops, there you go thinking about plotlines in slapstick comedies.
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Why am I homeless? Why do all you motherfuckers need homes is the real question.
They called it The Prayer, its answer was law
Mommy come back 'cause the water's all gone
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Rasix
Moderator
Posts: 15024
I am the harbinger of your doom!
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Because she wanted it for personal use (likely doesn't have a home PC)? Procrastinated on something that could actually get her fired?
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-Rasix
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Fabricated
Moderator
Posts: 8978
~Living the Dream~
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I've seen myself:
-Computers/keyboards infested with bugs of all various types: Spiders, roaches, ants, etc
-Computers/keyboards/whole rooms covered in a gelatinous tar goo due to being in confined space with a user who is a heavy smoker. Not just discoloring; measurable, actual tar goo.
-Blue flames shoot out the back of a power supply upon powering the computer on due to cat hair/dust build up.
-Extremely high-end, very high volume document scanners explode due to mechanical malfunctions.
-Mouses with so much oil/dead skin buildup they look like they're covered in dry gravy.
-Keyboards that produce measurable piles of dust/crumbs/bugs/fingernail clippings upon being cleaned out.
Computers are disgusting, much like anything humans touch on a regular basis.
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"The world is populated in the main by people who should not exist." - George Bernard Shaw
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Numtini
Terracotta Army
Posts: 7675
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When I was doing IT for small business I just made it a standard practice to chuck out the keyboard/mouse whenever we had employee churn, found enough of them that were truly disgusting to convince the boss that an extra $50 cost associated with hiring a new person wasn't unreasonable I tend to view the keyboard and mouse as being attached to the employee. I usually don't replace them if they get a new PC unless they're worn or soiled. (Of course, part of that is that the included mouse and keyboard keep getting cheaper and cheaper and are rarely as good as the last generation--I've actually taken stuff out of the trash because after an hour with a chicklet they wanted their old KB back) But I think I've always tossed them if we get someone new. We have really ludicrously low turnover though. When I was at the dot.com you got what was there because we had 130% a year turnover. |
If you can read this, you're on a board populated by misogynist assholes.
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Selby
Terracotta Army
Posts: 2963
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Dear god if even half that story is true what a clusterfuck.
I worked IT at a major university department. What they described was pretty close to what I experienced. Granted it was 2 people and neither were horridly fat, but one was extremely abusive and protected by the boss she was screwing and the other was filthy and extremely demanding on off hours. While I'm not going to say it was completely true with no embellishments, I'll give the benefit of the doubt the general storyline is rooted in a lot of truth. |
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Surlyboi
Terracotta Army
Posts: 10963
eat a bag of dicks
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The shit I've seen and heard from my public-facing colleagues makes me believe most of it. Embellished? No doubt, but I'm pretty sure the core of the story is pretty true.
And the stuff Fabricated mentioned? Yeah. We've seen far worse.
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Tuned in, immediately get to watch cringey Ubisoft talking head offering her deepest sympathies to the families impacted by the Orlando shooting while flanked by a man in a giraffe suit and some sort of "horrifically garish neon costumes through the ages" exhibit or something. We need to stop this fucking planet right now and sort some shit out. -Kail
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Slayerik
Terracotta Army
Posts: 4868
Victim: Sirius Maximus
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I'm an IT guy, and I've seen some pretty disgusting shit. Some of the BS parts of the story that ring out to me, as someone who in his younger days did quite a bit of it, is the part about fucking in bathroom...and leaving all the evidence. Maybe I have more common sense than these idiots, but bathrooms were avoided at all costs. Bottom of stairwells, comm closets, vacant offices, parking lots, the woods, etc...all ok. Bathrooms? Too public, and too often used by anyone. I used them a couple times, but they were lockable and in a very remote part of the building. Still scary as fuck exiting, not knowing what lies on the other side.
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"I have more qualifications than Jesus and earn more than this whole board put together. My ego is huge and my modesty non-existant." -Ironwood
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Surlyboi
Terracotta Army
Posts: 10963
eat a bag of dicks
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Meh. I just did it on my boss's desk.
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Tuned in, immediately get to watch cringey Ubisoft talking head offering her deepest sympathies to the families impacted by the Orlando shooting while flanked by a man in a giraffe suit and some sort of "horrifically garish neon costumes through the ages" exhibit or something. We need to stop this fucking planet right now and sort some shit out. -Kail
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Margalis
Terracotta Army
Posts: 12335
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-Keyboards that produce measurable piles of dust/crumbs/bugs/fingernail clippings upon being cleaned out.
Isn't this most keyboards? There's enough crumbs in my keyboard to feed a family of 4 for a week. |
vampirehipi23: I would enjoy a book written by a monkey and turned into a movie rather than this.
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Ingmar
Terracotta Army
Posts: 19280
Auto Assault Affectionado
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Most of the story sounds like bullshit to me. Kernels of truth, I've seen some gross offices in my days for sure, but I'm pretty sure most of that is about as true as your average Penthouse forum letter.
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The Transcendent One: AH... THE ROGUE CONSTRUCT.
Nordom: Sense of closure: imminent.
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Cyrrex
Terracotta Army
Posts: 10603
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Meh. I just did it on my boss's desk.
With your boss? You slut. Story feel completely apart from me when she admitted to licking something clean, can't remember what. I mean, a person might do that, but I don't think they'd tell you they did that. The sex scene also sounded super unrealistic. Two condoms and McD bag left behind? Nah. |
"...maybe if you cleaned the piss out of the sunny d bottles under your desks and returned em, you could upgrade you vid cards, fucken lusers.." - Grunk
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Surlyboi
Terracotta Army
Posts: 10963
eat a bag of dicks
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With my project manager. Whose pants the boss was also trying to get into. But he was in Hong Kong. His loss.
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Tuned in, immediately get to watch cringey Ubisoft talking head offering her deepest sympathies to the families impacted by the Orlando shooting while flanked by a man in a giraffe suit and some sort of "horrifically garish neon costumes through the ages" exhibit or something. We need to stop this fucking planet right now and sort some shit out. -Kail
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Trippy
Administrator
Posts: 23621
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Yegolev
Moderator
Posts: 24440
2/10 WOULD NOT INGEST
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Wow, #59 is me all day long. I guess I really am an engineer.
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Why am I homeless? Why do all you motherfuckers need homes is the real question.
They called it The Prayer, its answer was law
Mommy come back 'cause the water's all gone
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Samwise
Moderator
Posts: 19223
sentient yeast infection
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Wow, #59 is me all day long. I guess I really am an engineer.
That one spoke to me as well. Also 46. |
"I have not actually recommended many games, and I'll go on the record here saying my track record is probably best in the industry." - schild
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Ingmar
Terracotta Army
Posts: 19280
Auto Assault Affectionado
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#7 happened just this week! |
The Transcendent One: AH... THE ROGUE CONSTRUCT.
Nordom: Sense of closure: imminent.
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Father mike
Terracotta Army
Posts: 533
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I'm on crappy conference center wifi today, so it took forever for the page to load. I was beginning to think it was purposefully going to a 404 page, which would have been |
I would like to thank Vladimir Putin for ensuring that every member of the NPR news staff has had to say "Pussy Riot" on the air multiple times.
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Hammond
Terracotta Army
Posts: 637
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for some reason #40 really spoke to me
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