Attack of the Juiceheads

[HaemishM]

Read some of that shit if you care about sports or baseball.

So Barry Bonds had a press conference yesterday

Bonds is a fucking retard. I've always thought he was a good player, and a shitty speaker. He is now on my "fuck you, asshat" list. Why even bother with a press conference if all you are going to do is dodge the questions and attack the people asking them?

"I don't know what cheating is," he said. "I don't believe steroids can help your eye-hand coordination, technically hit a baseball. I just don't believe it. That's my opinion."

Yeah, Bonds and my opinion is that you are full of shit. No, it may not help you see the ball any better or know the game better. But it damn sure will make your batspeed faster. It damn sure will make your arms stronger so that a popout becomes a seeing eye single, or a long fly becomes a monster home run. If it isn't cheating, why not just admit you used them? Oh wait, because if you do, you'll be admitting to perjury, which means we can look forward to your evasions ALL SEASON LONG.

"I'm an adult and I take responsibility for what I do, but I'm not going to allow you guys to ruin my joy," Bonds said.

No, you don't actually. You try to say that other people have lied, so it's ok if you have, and that anything you might have used had no effect on you. If it wasn't going to have an effect, why exactly did you take it again? Do you think everyone is that fucking stupid?

"Because Babe Ruth is one of the greatest baseball players ever, and Babe Ruth ain't black, either," he said. "I'm black. Blacks, we go through a little more. ... I'm not a racist though, but I live in the real world. I'm fine with that."

Fuck you. No, really, FUCK YOU. Hank Aaron is black. You are treading on the hallowed ground of Hank Fucking Aaron, you classless piece of shit. The most revered record in baseball. It has nothing to do with Ruth being white, or you being black. It has to do with playing the goddamn game on a level playing field, you fucking tool. You aren't a racist, you are just claiming that other people don't want you to be considered as great a baseball player as Ruth because you are black and he is white. FUCK YOU.

He also said some shit about how the reporters should just forget the steroids issue and let MLB and Bud Selig and the Player's Union sort out the game and clean it up. We fucking tried that, jackass, for 10 years, and you self-interested jackasses did fuckall about it. Your time to clean it up yourselves has fucking run out.

[El Gallo]

"You've got to have some serious talent to have 53,000 people saying you suck" is my new motto.

[Mr_PeaCH]

He is now on my "fuck you, asshat" list.

Just now?  Welcome to the party.   

"... but I'm not going to allow you guys to ruin my joy," Bonds said.

Here's another baldfaced lie.  Bonds is incapable of experiencing "joy"; he'd have to have a soul first.


You didn't use it because the ESPN article didn't include the full transcript but there was a notable riff where he (Bonds) goes on where he's ripping on Canseco and he basically said that because he is categorically a better ballplayer than Canseco, he doesn't need to pay any attention to anything Canseco says or does; basically can't be bothered to look down and give him the time of day.  The stuff that comes out of this guys mouth straight from his ego... I can't begin to imagine what it must be like to be a teammate of his.

[Joe]

I hear he's all sugar and gumdrops until you ask to be first player in GT4.

[Paelos]

He compared the press to reruns of Sanford and Son. Again, because he's retarded.

I hate him. Really, he's one of the few people in the world on my list. However, the things that do it are complete and utter disregard for the truth in shameless self-promotion, denial of the most fundamental aspects of life, and disgracing yourself in a position of power. He had SO much potential to be a great human being and a great role model and he fucking tanked on every level.

I'm saying this now just in case he dies tomorrow. I'll piss all over his memorial thread. He failed as a human being.

[WayAbvPar]

Bonds is an lying, cheating arrogant douchebag of epic proportions. I fucking hate him and actually wish him great bodily harm. I pray that some spring training phenom with a rocket arm and little control drills him in his giant steroid-inflated head and he is unable to play again. God damn he fucking sucks.

[toma levine]

It's a damn good thing his father isn't alive to see the kind of disgrace he's become.