Rohmulus, leader of the Skabine forces, would like to report that the team is
READY for the battle against the Necromantic team
Alive Not Dead.
The only perfect record left in the league is about to be
blemished broken.
Hostus Hostilius has finally stopped diddling the slave girls and joined the ranks for a game. To make up for lost time he has marked Benson the Hedge Knight for death.
Alive Not Dead, for all its bluster, isn't really that much of a team. Coach Llyse has got the league fooled. It's a four man show, and one of those men is now DEAD. Let me break it down for you:
First up, these Flesh Golems. Big and burly looking alright, but USELESS. "The Hound" has played 13 games and hasn't even knocked anyone out, let alone sent them to the stand with an injury. What a terror!
Granted Gregor has had a bit more luck, but it's still not much to write home about. The LINERAT has Benjamin managed to put away a kill an injury and a KO in THREE games, above Gregor's average in every way!
Then there are these Wights in their spiky armor with their fist clenching poses. Atarin the What? Cruel? Can you really say that about a man who has been in the hospital more often than his opponents? What's cruel is nuffle imposing two MVPs upon this waste of space!
Benson the Hedge Knight is something a bit more serious. With a couple of kills, a heap of touchdowns, some passes and a bit of a running game he is one of the stars of the side, on whom the rest of the team lean when their feeble efforts fall short. Unfortunately for him his number is about to come up. Remember, Hostus is on the case...
Zombies? Lets forget them entirely. Those slow shuffling bags of flesh wont be getting close enough to get anything but a mouth full of flies as the rats rush past. I don't know why Llyse has given the blighters Block, the best they can hope is to copy Rob and stick a boot in here and there when they hope the ref isn't looking.
As for the Ghouls... I can only pass on a message to Gui the Sad. Get your game face on Gui, because Rohmulus, chief maimer and
killer of the Skabine forces, is going to be living in Katze's shadow all game. Time for you to lift a finger and do some of the work that he has been carrying you through all season.
Now, a final point. About those Werewolves. Well. Hobbes died.
Calvin... well... Even I have to hold my breath and hope he has a bad game. The beast has done EVERYTHING. Two kills, 7 casualties, seven touchdowns... level four without ever being acknowledged for his hard work with a MVP tag... It is on his shoulders that the faint hopes of the team survive. Rest assured that The Rape of Skabine know this, have prepared for this, and will be waiting.
Coach Llyse is the favourite. He has won every game this season. He has some of the toughest and most experienced players in the league. But he has never defeated Coach Lamaros.
And he is not going to start now.
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