Jane, get me off this crazy thiiiiiinnnnnngggggg!!

[shiznitz]

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1315518/Segway-owner-Jimi-Heselden-dies-riding-machines-cliff.html

The multi-millionaire owner of the Segway company died in a freak accident yesterday when he rode one of the high-tech two-wheel machines off a cliff and into a river.

Former miner Jimi Heselden, 62, plunged into the River Wharfe while riding around his West Yorkshire estate in Boston Spa on a rugged country version of the Segway.

[01101010]

Now I feel bad about myself because I laughed as I was reading the article and imagining how the event went down. 

[Hawkbit]

The universe will have its way.

[Chimpy]

Was he playing cliff-side segway polo?

[Paelos]

I laughed at the "rugged country version of the Segway."

Yeah, I can see a couple of rednecks packing their gear to the treestand on their All Terrain Segway.

[Lantyssa]

Hah.  A 4-wheeler is where it's at.  I doubt a Segway can do 30 down a caliche road.

[Sir T]

Well, the article makes it clear that he bought the sedgeway company last December, and didn't actually design it, so its a little less finny than it appears.

Kinda sad to be honest. Seems like a decent guy. Can't help wondering what exactly happened to cause the fall but I doubt anyone will ever know for sure.

[MuffinMan]

[Furiously]

The robot revolution has begun.

[Nebu]

I had this crazy image of a Segway with a Toyota emblem on the front of it when I first read the title. 

[Nerf]

I laughed at the "rugged country version of the Segway."

Yeah, I can see a couple of rednecks packing their gear to the treestand on their All Terrain Segway.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hh2nLWYnxkM

[Muffled]

I'm not sure how to think about what I just watched, Nerf.  Do we know how much they charge for one of those?

[HaemishM]

I know what to think. One word: No.

[Cadaverine]

How the hell are you supposed to ollie on that thing?

[Paelos]

How the hell are you supposed to ollie on that thing?

Carefully. With a M16 strapped to your back so the people that laugh at you think twice.

[Nerf]

How the hell are you supposed to ollie on that thing?

Carefully. With a M16 strapped to your back so the people that laugh at you think twice.

Letting going of the handlebars to shoot doesn't look like it would be a good thing, the answer is to mount your rifle onto it, and preferably something bigger than an M16 - maybe an M60 or a Mk19 grenade launcher.

[Muffled]

I would swear that I once saw Chuck Norris on my television riding a motorcycle with an Uzi duct-taped to each handlebar, gunning down some random goons as he drove around.  I can't recall anything else about it, and Google has failed me, but I remember it as being awesome and ridiculous in equal measure.

[Arthur_Parker]

Kinda sad to be honest. Seems like a decent guy. Can't help wondering what exactly happened to cause the fall but I doubt anyone will ever know for sure.

My father in law is good friends with someone who apparently knew him very well, he's very highly thought of in Leeds.

http://www.yorkshirepost.co.uk/news/Segway-millionaire-Jimi-Heselden-died.6554293.jp

Mr Heselden made his fortune when his Leeds-based firm Hesco Bastion developed the "blast wall" basket, which protect soldiers in Afghanistan and Iraq, as a replacement for traditional sandbags.

The former miner, who left school when he was 15, was known as much for his charity giving as he was for his massive fortune and tributes have poured in for him from various sectors.

The Leeds Community Foundation said he had donated £23 million to causes in his home city since 2008.

He was also closely linked to the Help For Heroes charity, which supports injured military personnel.

Mr Heselden was also applauded for bringing hundreds of jobs to the Leeds area with the revolutionary protection baskets made by his firm, Hesco Bastion, since 1990.

[Furiously]

I would swear that I once saw Chuck Norris on my television riding a motorcycle with an Uzi duct-taped to each handlebar, gunning down some random goons as he drove around.  I can't recall anything else about it, and Google has failed me, but I remember it as being awesome and ridiculous in equal measure.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Delta_Force_%28film%29

[Morat20]

I laughed at the "rugged country version of the Segway."

Yeah, I can see a couple of rednecks packing their gear to the treestand on their All Terrain Segway.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hh2nLWYnxkM

Once the rigger puts some guns on it, some armor, and drives it remotely -- it'd make a nice door knocker.

[Nerf]

We've already got remote-controlled machine guns mounted on tank treads, and they should be a hell of a lot cheaper to make.  I would imagine the expensive part of the segway/battle-segway that I listed is the lean-forward/back auto-stabilizing drive control system.  A way to move single troops around faster while not hampering their ability to return fire or limiting their vision could be helpful, though.

[WindupAtheist]

A way to move single troops around faster while not hampering their ability to return fire or limiting their vision could be helpful, though.

 

[Nerf]

A way to move single troops around faster while not hampering their ability to return fire or limiting their vision could be helpful, though.

 

Fuuuuuuck that, have you ever ridden a horse?

Goddamn evil bastards, and probably the least stable shooting platform one could envision, aside from maybe trying to return fire while swimming in oatmeal.

And please don't tell stories of guys making 200yd headshots on horseback with smoothbore blackpowder rifles - most military personnel don't even qualify as expert with their rifles, which requires you to consistently hit center of mass on a man-sized target from 100 to 500 yards with iron sights, much of the shooting in the prone position and relatively slow-fire.

I did the AQT at the end of a weekend rifle course and came about 2 hits shy of it myself, with a $1500 target rifle and optics.  It sounds a whole lot easier than it is.

[HaemishM]

The Mongols say HI! 

[Nerf]

The Mongols say HI! 

[Teleku]

You are aware that the Mongols hoped the wall and conquered all of China, right?

[Nerf]

You are aware that the Mongols hoped the wall and conquered all of China, right?

Motherfuckers, I once hoped for a pony and all I conquered was Portugal.  :(

[Hawkbit]

God damn Mongolians, stop tearing down my shitty wall!

[Cyrrex]

You are aware that the Mongols hoped the wall and conquered all of China, right?

Motherfuckers, I once hoped for a pony and all I conquered was Portugal.  :(

I lulled.

[Azazel]

And please don't tell stories of guys making 200yd headshots on horseback with smoothbore blackpowder rifles - most military personnel don't even qualify as expert with their rifles, which requires you to consistently hit center of mass on a man-sized target from 100 to 500 yards with iron sights, much of the shooting in the prone position and relatively slow-fire.

I did the AQT at the end of a weekend rifle course and came about 2 hits shy of it myself, with a $1500 target rifle and optics.  It sounds a whole lot easier than it is.

No offence, but this thread needs less of your nay-saying, and more Broughen. I can only imagine what he could do from horseback. Sorry, your post just reminded me of him, in an opposite-way.

[DraconianOne]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NOpOqgotJZc

He'd probably have scored more if he was on a Segway.

EDIT: Same guy, better video, no idea what the fuck they're saying: http://vimeo.com/8096033  - watch at 9:30 to see him riding and the target he's firing at.

[Nerf]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NOpOqgotJZc

He'd probably have scored more if he was on a Segway.

EDIT: Same guy, better video, no idea what the fuck they're saying: http://vimeo.com/8096033  - watch at 9:30 to see him riding and the target he's firing at.

While that was impressive to watch, if you look at the target his groups appear to be 24-30" or so while moving from ~50yards to ~15 yards.  If we go with the low group size and average the distance assuming 8 shots and 5 yards difference per shot (32.5 yards average distance), he's hitting at 72MOA (minutes of angle,1 MOA = 1" at 100 yards).

At 400 yards, if we ignore physics for a moment and assume the arrows will travel that far with the same speed and in a straight line, his arrows would group inside of a 288" circle, or 24 feet.

I think he should give the segway a try, because a 24 foot group means this guy can't even hit a parked car at ranges far less than we require our soldiers to make accurate center of mass shots at.

Also, fuck horses again, temperamental fucking beasts that will gladly stop in their tracks and throw your ass off because they saw a goddamn cricket in their path.  Add that into the logistics required to feed them and keep them healthy, the inherent tactical disadvantage at roaming the battlefield with your center of mass a solid 8-10' above ground, and the inability to quickly find effective cover if engaged, and horses are a horrible fucking idea.

[MahrinSkel]

Among the "odd" jobs I've worked at in my life was a stint as a ranch-hand.  I've "ridden fence" and other roaming tasks on both horses and on (old style three wheel) ATV's.  Even though nowhere near as safe or maneuverable as the modern four-wheelers, ATV's were *far* superior.  They didn't wander off while I was working on something, they didn't spontaneously jump or stop because they saw something they didn't like (like a mouse bolt from under a rock), and I didn't have to spend 30-45 minutes rubbing them down, cleaning them up, and feeding them when I was done.

Trying to shoot from the back of one?  Fuck that, unless they've specifically been trained to it, it's almost guaranteed they'd rear and bolt if a gun went off.

--Dave

[Merusk]

What we need is some sort of atv with an armored cockpit.. variable weapon mount points on the outside.. maybe let them rotate independently..   Oooh! And make them 20' tall to see over any obstacles!

 

[Nerf]

What we need is some sort of atv with an armored cockpit.. variable weapon mount points on the outside.. maybe let them rotate independently..   Oooh! And make them 20' tall to see over any obstacles!

 

I think I've just got the vehicle in mind:



If that doesn't work, I've got this badger idea floating around that should definitely nail it.