Kevin Smith Unleashes Twitter Storm on Southwest Airlines

[Musashi]

It just seems to me after reading that crap that the fat cat is in denial.  Maybe he should consider that being tagged with the stigma of being Too Fat to Fly could be an impetus for him to, oh I dunno, take a fucking walk.  The energy he's using deflecting responsibility for this is probably a big part of why he's a fat fuck in the first place.  After all, if he were to lose some weight and use this opportunity to set an example, then the big bad stigma is reduced to a painful reminder not to eyeball that double-cheeseburger remorsefully - no longer a burden to carry for (woe-is-me) perpetuity.  I think Michelle Obama needs to weigh in on this.  Oh look.  A pun.

We can argue about how he may have been one sandwich under the limit, and he fit into his seat, and the ladies were already leaning away.  But that's a load of shit.  He knows it, too.  Also, doesn't he have a movie coming out?  Yea.  This has nothing to do with that.  If I were Southwest Airlines, I'd put a blog post out that said, 'Saying I'm not too fat, when I am in fact, really fucking fat is a Cop Out.'  Hit the fucking gym, douche bag.

[Lantyssa]

They are both at fault, neither wants to admit culpability, and both owe me for the time I've spent reading about this silly happenstance.

There.  Problems solved.

[Soln]

having had to watch some clip with Smith recently he doesn't seem that "fat".  Big, but not out the door, moo-moo obese.

also, he apparently has a new film coming out soon.  What a coincidence.

[dusematic]

They are both at fault, neither wants to admit culpability, and both owe me for the time I've spent reading about this silly happenstance.

There.  Problems solved.

No, Kevin Smith is at fault.  Isn't perpetually riding the fence and seeing everything through gray-colored glasses fucked out by now?  A morbidly obese rich white guy buys two tickets.  He then changes his mind and agrees to be put on standby as a convenience to him in order to change his itinerary from that which he originally contracted for.  He agreed to take the one seat.  He was too fat.  There was no way for them to know that he'd be too fat unless they are keeping files on all of their customers like fucking J. Edgar Hoover.  There. Now the problem is solved.

[dusematic]

having had to watch some clip with Smith recently he doesn't seem that "fat".  Big, but not out the door, moo-moo obese.

also, he apparently has a new film coming out soon.  What a coincidence.

http://cache-03.gawkerassets.com/assets/images/1/2008/11/Rogen_Kevin_Fat_Guys.flv.jpg

That's the definition of morbid obesity staring you in the face.

[Lakov_Sanite]

I think the point is not kevin smith fat but how much is 'too' fat.  By the airways own guidelines if he can put the armrests down and buckle his own belt, he's not too fat.  He says he can do this so the issue is that the pilot or flight attendant saw him and made some sort of judgement call based on what i can only assume is a policy of grabbing cash.

I'll say it again, airlines dont give a fuck if you are comfortable, removing fat people has nothing to do with YOU. Airline safety is also not infringed upon buy having a couple tubby people on a plane. The only reason for this is to have people buy two seats, nothing more.

[schild]

I think the point is not kevin smith fat but how much is 'too' fat.  By the airways own guidelines if he can put the armrests down and buckle his own belt, he's not too fat.  He says he can do this so the issue is that the pilot or flight attendant saw him and made some sort of judgement call based on what i can only assume is a policy of grabbing cash.

I'll say it again, airlines dont give a fuck if you are comfortable, removing fat people has nothing to do with YOU. Airline safety is also not infringed upon buy having a couple tubby people on a plane. The only reason for this is to have people buy two seats, nothing more.

I'm not buying this, sorry. I realize it's an easy extra empty seat sell, but frankly, it's a winner. Arguing against it is retarded as even fat people don't want to sit next to fat people.

[fuser]

A morbidly obese rich white guy buys two tickets.  He then changes his mind and agrees to be put on standby as a convenience to him in order to change his itinerary from that which he originally contracted for.  He agreed to take the one seat.  He was too fat.

I've heard so many variations about this now thanks for making it concise.

Just some clips from Southwest's Customer of size page.

What is the definitive gauge for a Customer of size?
The armrest is the definitive gauge for a Customer of size. It serves as the boundary between seats and measures 17 inches in width. Customers who are unable to lower both armrests and/or who compromise any portion of adjacent seating should proactively book the number of seats needed prior to travel.

How do I qualify for and request a refund of the additional seat purchase?
As long as the flight does not oversell (having more confirmed Customers waiting to board an aircraft than seats on the aircraft), we will refund the additional seat purchase after travel.

Why isn’t this information on your tickets, referenced on the booking/reservations pages of your web site, or questioned by your Reservations Employees?
We estimate that the Customer of size policy affects far less than half a percent of our Customers, and ultimately, it is the responsibility of a Customer with a unique and unusual need to communicate with us upfront so that we may best serve him/her and all others onboard. We won’t know of an unusual need unless the Customer tells us.

I'll take all of this with a grain of salt as it's probably from a CMS that's being updated.

[Goreschach]

I'm not buying this, sorry. I realize it's an easy extra empty seat sell, but frankly, it's a winner. Arguing against it is retarded as even fat people don't want to sit next to fat people.

Actually, that's a good idea. Have a 'fat people' section on the plane. The fatties will be too busy arguing over who's crowding who to piss and moan about the airline.

[schild]

I'm not buying this, sorry. I realize it's an easy extra empty seat sell, but frankly, it's a winner. Arguing against it is retarded as even fat people don't want to sit next to fat people.

Actually, that's a good idea. Have a 'fat people' section on the plane. The fatties will be too buy arguing over who's crowding who to piss and moan about the airline.

Not a chance, they need to keep getting punished and demoralized so they fucking diet. I'm sorry I've become the fucking poster boy for how to diet, but I've dieted a total of 20 weeks my entire life (chopped in half over 2 years) and I've lost 120 fucking pounds. Fuck'em.

Edit: Note, you don't diet until you hit rock bottom - Kevin Smith has a hot wife for a fatass and is rich as sin, he'll never diet unless he breaks something. He might slash his gut open on a glass table though and that might prompt him. He carries his weight like he's in a sumo suit, it's just embarrassing.

[fuser]

Edit: Note, you don't diet until you hit rock bottom - Kevin Smith has a hot wife for a fatass and is rich as sin, he'll never diet unless he breaks something. He might slash his gut open on a glass table though and that might prompt him. He carries his weight like he's in a sumo suit, it's just embarrassing.

I think your bang on about this. He's in total denial about his weight, even from his last blog posting he admitted he's fat but still thinks SWA is totally in the fault. Talk about not being able to see the forest for the trees.

[LK]

Kevin Smith really let himself go if that's a recent photo of him. He used to be in the 200 region which was alright but he's easily pushing 300+ in that one.

[dusematic]

I think the point is not kevin smith fat but how much is 'too' fat.  By the airways own guidelines if he can put the armrests down and buckle his own belt, he's not too fat.  He says he can do this so the issue is that the pilot or flight attendant saw him and made some sort of judgement call based on what i can only assume is a policy of grabbing cash.

I'll say it again, airlines dont give a fuck if you are comfortable, removing fat people has nothing to do with YOU. Airline safety is also not infringed upon buy having a couple tubby people on a plane. The only reason for this is to have people buy two seats, nothing more.

1.  I'm sure Kevin Smith does indeed claim he can put his armrests down and buckle his seat belt. 

2.  I love the idea nowadays in our cultural zeitgeist that all judgment based policies are irredeemably flawed.  If it's not a black letter policy people like to assume it's somehow unfair.  Cute.

3.  In your world flight attendants are in on the take?  Part of a massive conspiracy to bilk honest folks like you and me out of our hard-earned money!

4.  Airlines DO give a fuck if you're comfortable.  See customer satisfaction and good business practices.

5.  Removing fat people has everything to do with me, and how much more comfortable I'll be not covered in a blubber blanket.

6.  Stop being a fat apologist.  99.9% of the time being obese just means you're lazy and intemperate.  We're not talking about carrying 30 extra pounds here.  We're talking about 100+.  It's fucking disgusting.

[Oban]

4.  Airlines DO give a fuck if you're comfortable.  See customer satisfaction and good business practices.

What airlines are you flying?

[dusematic]

Ha.  Coach is coach man.  Airlines are in trouble as it is.  You can't pay 100 dollars to fly across the country and expect to loll around eating grapes on a bearskin carpet.

[Oban]

Ha.  Coach is coach man.  Airlines are in trouble as it is.  You can't pay 100 dollars to fly across the country and expect to loll around eating grapes on a bearskin carpet.

Even in first class we do not get bearskin carpets and I am pretty sure lolling about will get you tied up with plastic handcuffs in five minutes or less on pretty much any airline.

[dusematic]

Is it literal day?  I'm guessing tomorrow's opposite day. 

[Cadaverine]

Kevin Smith really let himself go if that's a recent photo of him. He used to be in the 200 region which was alright but he's easily pushing 300+ in that one.

After seeing the video of Smith & Rogen, he's barely fitting in the chair he's in there, let alone an airplane seat.

That said, I weight 290 lbs, and didn't have any issues last year when I flew down to Orlando.  But I have actual muscle mass in there, rather than just being an amorphous blob.

[Soln]

wow full out moo-moo from that pic.  How come his face isn't a giant pumpkin?

[dusematic]

lol.  Beards are a fat guy's best friend.  But yeah I never did the fat guy face math before.  Nice point.

[Slyfeind]

YIKES. What is he doing to himself? He's "battled obesity" before, what did he do, just give up?

[Righ]

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20100215181413AAf6rUx

Particularly this answer:

I will stick to the facts just like you requested.

It's simple Science to determine Kevin Smith's weight. Here are my calculations:

SouthWest seat width is 17.25 inches. Kevin Smith requires two, so we can assume his waist is about 35 inches wide. He's more round than he is elliptical, so we estimate his body depth to be 35 inches. We already know he is 69 inches tall. This gives us a cylinder.

So calculating the volume of a cylinder we use the formula:

Volume = pi r2 h = 3.14 x 17.25 x 17.25 x 69 = ~64,470 cubic inches

Dividing by 1728 cubic inches per cubic foot = ~37.31 cubic feet

Now we multiply by the density of the human body 62.42796 pounds per cubic foot and we get:

2,328.6 pounds. Roughly.

No wonder they kicked him off that flight!
Source(s):
http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_is_the_formula_for_finding_the_volume_of_a_cylinder

http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_is_the_average_density_of_the_human_body

http://www.metric-conversions.org/volume/cubic-feet-to-cubic-inches.htm

[01101010]

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20100215181413AAf6rUx

Particularly this answer:

I will stick to the facts just like you requested.

It's simple Science to determine Kevin Smith's weight. Here are my calculations:

SouthWest seat width is 17.25 inches. Kevin Smith requires two, so we can assume his waist is about 35 inches wide. He's more round than he is elliptical, so we estimate his body depth to be 35 inches. We already know he is 69 inches tall. This gives us a cylinder.

So calculating the volume of a cylinder we use the formula:

Volume = pi r2 h = 3.14 x 17.25 x 17.25 x 69 = ~64,470 cubic inches

Dividing by 1728 cubic inches per cubic foot = ~37.31 cubic feet

Now we multiply by the density of the human body 62.42796 pounds per cubic foot and we get:

2,328.6 pounds. Roughly.

No wonder they kicked him off that flight!
Source(s):
http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_is_the_formula_for_finding_the_volume_of_a_cylinder

http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_is_the_average_density_of_the_human_body

http://www.metric-conversions.org/volume/cubic-feet-to-cubic-inches.htm

  That is fantastic.

[dusematic]

YIKES. What is he doing to himself? He's "battled obesity" before, what did he do, just give up?

Maybe it was a pyrrhic victory.

[dusematic]

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20100215181413AAf6rUx

Particularly this answer:

I will stick to the facts just like you requested.

It's simple Science to determine Kevin Smith's weight. Here are my calculations:

SouthWest seat width is 17.25 inches. Kevin Smith requires two, so we can assume his waist is about 35 inches wide. He's more round than he is elliptical, so we estimate his body depth to be 35 inches. We already know he is 69 inches tall. This gives us a cylinder.

So calculating the volume of a cylinder we use the formula:

Volume = pi r2 h = 3.14 x 17.25 x 17.25 x 69 = ~64,470 cubic inches

Dividing by 1728 cubic inches per cubic foot = ~37.31 cubic feet

Now we multiply by the density of the human body 62.42796 pounds per cubic foot and we get:

2,328.6 pounds. Roughly.

No wonder they kicked him off that flight!
Source(s):
http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_is_the_formula_for_finding_the_volume_of_a_cylinder

http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_is_the_average_density_of_the_human_body

http://www.metric-conversions.org/volume/cubic-feet-to-cubic-inches.htm

  That is fantastic.

It was almost fantastic.  35 inches is close to a normal waistline.  Kevin Smith is obviously over 50 inches.  It's also probably why he dresses like a 6th grader.


edit: i'm an idiot.  circumference nay equals width.

[Tale]

He's fat. I was fat once, not nearly as fat as him and there's nothing I hate more than sitting next to a fat fucker on a fucking airplane.

Having also lost my excess weight in the last few years, I agree. I hated being fat. The answer is to start moving and keep moving and never quit. I found that incredibly tough, so I sympathise with fat people, but there's only one way to make things easier. Being fat is a problem, not something to regard as "just how I am".

[schild]

Given the fact all it took was some hardcore dieting and not eating total shit like buffalo wings and such, no, I don't fucking sympathize with fatties.

[Arnold]

Given the fact all it took was some hardcore dieting and not eating total shit like buffalo wings and such, no, I don't fucking sympathize with fatties.

It's pretty amazing, but if you eat real food the fat will fall off.  So fucking fast it will seem like magic.  And real food tastes pretty damn good too.

Ditch the "Lean Cuisine" and all that other processed crap.  Get some basic, real food.  Meat, vegetables, etc.

[schild]

And real food tastes pretty damn good too.

I'm not 100% sure you and I are talking about real food. I call this the nonhuman diet.

It's really not that good for you, but it'll stop Mr. Smith from a fucking early death for sure.

[Tebonas]

I lost weight just by eating normal food three times a day instead of whatever comes my way in one huge orgy around noon and whatever I fancy in the evening.

But people are different. Which doesn't excuse Kevin Smith, because what I gather from his podcasts (which were better before he started smoking pot, I just heard a selfpitying tirade over one hour where he whined that Zack and Miri didn't do as good as he hoped so he had to get high for a few days and mourn himself) he just eats crap in large quantities and goes on a diet once in a while where he only drinks slimfast and shit. Dude should learn how to eat and be done with it.

[Morat20]

Best advice for losing weight -- or at the very least, if you live a sedentary lifestyle like us cubicle drones, maintaining yourself at 'chubby' rather than 'obese' -- is as follows:

1) Stop going to McDonalds. Same for Jack in the Box, Wendys, whatever. If it's fast-food burger place, it's like a giant fucking bucket of fat. Cut out anything fried. "Fried" should not be a regular part of your diet. That includes "french fries".
2) Stop drinking regular soft drinks, and seriously cut back on the booze. If you're going through more than a six-pack of beer a week, you're getting a lot of calories you're just ignoring. And you don't even want to KNOW how much fucking sugar you're getting with a few cans of Coke a day. Oh, and learn to love black coffee.

The average American will drop 10 to 15% of his/her body weight and stay at the lower weight, just from that. Manage to find some time to walk every day, or do 30 minutes of yoga, or even just take the stairs up to your office instead of the elevator and you'll lose more.

Too many empty calories from high-fructose corn syrup, too much fat. Best choice I EVER made was switching to diet soft drinks, and then cutting out fast food -- or switching to places that simply weren't so larded with fat as McDonald's.

[Quinton]

Oh, and learn to love black coffee.

I dislike coffee.  I also can't stand artificial sweeteners.  Recently, I discovered that I enjoy unsweetened ice tea (black, green, etc) which conveniently removes any need to drink soda for caffeine, and provides for an alternative to water when I want something with a bit of flavor.  This is a huge win.

[Morat20]

Oh, and learn to love black coffee.

I dislike coffee.  I also can't stand artificial sweeteners.  Recently, I discovered that I enjoy unsweetened ice tea (black, green, etc) which conveniently removes any need to drink soda for caffeine, and provides for an alternative to water when I want something with a bit of flavor.  This is a huge win.

It was more that while coffee isn't full of calories and fat, the sheer amount of creamer, sugar, milk and god knows what else people put into it ARE. I'm not a huge coffee fan, but I've seen enough of the creations from Starbucks and the like to wonder, at times, if milkshakes don't have less fat and sugar than someones whipped, foamed, stirred, sugared, pseudo-coffee creation.

[Merusk]

I've seen enough of the creations from Starbucks and the like to wonder, at times, if milkshakes don't have less fat and sugar than someones whipped, foamed, stirred, sugared, pseudo-coffee creation.

You got me curious so I went and looked.

A venti (24oz) Caramel Frappuccino w/ whipped cream is 500 calories.
A venti Iced Peppermint White chocolate Mocha - whip W/ 2% milk is 680

A 21oz vanilla shake from McDonalds is 740.
A large (no volume given for "Large" but I think it's 21) Chocolate Frosty  is 378
A Medium (no volume or ability to pick a different size) Chocolate Shake from Burger King is 650

For Comparison a Big Mac is 540 calories, a Quarter pounder is 510 and a Double Cheeseburger is 440.

 

[Mrbloodworth]

In this instance, he was better silent.