Filter yourself some kick-ass vodka.

[Shockeye]

I don't know how I missed this last month, but I thought you all might be interested seeing as how most of you are raging drunks.

Our theory is that a simple brita water filter can be used to make bad vodka, into good. In our case this meant turning a Vladimir™, into a Ketel One™. At $11.09 for 1.75 liter (Ketel is 11.99 for the 350 ml), Vladimir is a steal. It is, however, painful to drink, has a repugnant aftertaste, posesses a bouquet reminiscent of rubbing alcohol. Our working theory was that these terrible qualities were caused by a lack of proper filtration, and that running our Vlad through a charcoal filter would remove some of the impurities causing these odors and flavors.

...

I was shocked. I’d expected the vodka to taste marginally better, but did not expect the great results we came up with that evening. Further tests need to be performed on other spirits, but preliminary findings should be sufficient to run a college student or two to the emergency room. That’s a joke kids, don’t drink more than you can handle and always stop when your cousin Marge starts looking attractive.
The filtered result was smooth and bore almost no aftertaste. For those of you who like the unique flavor of a Kettle One, Grey Goose, or other top shelf vodka, this is not a perfect substitute. However, this would be the perfect mixer vodka in my opinion. Try a blind taste test with your drunkard guests next time you throw a party and send us your results.
-Chris, Staff Scientician

[WayAbvPar]

Holy shit, that is a great idea! Might have to give that a try...but I bet buying a better brand of vodka is cheaper than buying a bunch of Brita filters.

[Big Gulp]

Holy shit, that is a great idea! Might have to give that a try...but I bet buying a better brand of vodka is cheaper than buying a bunch of Brita filters.

As a bourbon drinker I also doubt that this would do much to turn Old Crow into Maker's Mark.  With vodka you can remove impurities and still have vodka.  With bourbon you remove those impurities you're also probably removing a lot of taste from the charred barrels.

[WayAbvPar]

Agreed. The only reason I would do this is if I was going to use a vodka for mixing, like Bloody Marys, or something. Only a Philistine would filter bourbon!

[Azaroth]

What's probably happening here is that you're adding that BritaTM flavour to your vodka, as well as filtering out, yes, a bit of crap.

However, this is not distillation, and this does not turn low quality alcohol into high quality alcohol. It's crap into slightly less offensive crap.

You shouldn't be drinking crap in the first place. I'm not sure why people find it utterly offensive to spend an extra $10 on a bottle of liquor.

Bottom line, you're tricking yourself into thinking you're not quite as cheap as you are. That's fine I guess.

[Big Gulp]

You shouldn't be drinking crap in the first place. I'm not sure why people find it utterly offensive to spend an extra $10 on a bottle of liquor.

Because that $10 adds up quickly.  It's the reason I usually drink Jim Beam over better stuff like Maker's; it's at the right price point and it's good enough.

[Paelos]

You shouldn't be drinking crap in the first place. I'm not sure why people find it utterly offensive to spend an extra $10 on a bottle of liquor.

Because that $10 adds up quickly.  It's the reason I usually drink Jim Beam over better stuff like Maker's; it's at the right price point and it's good enough.

Bah, Knob Creek all the way, but make the bottle last by only drinking it for the first one or two drinks. Then you have that bottle of Jimmy sitting around for the afterglow.

[Big Gulp]

Bah, Knob Creek all the way, but make the bottle last by only drinking it for the first one or two drinks. Then you have that bottle of Jimmy sitting around for the afterglow.

Actually, truth be told, Wild Turkey is my favorite bourbon, but I won't drink it because it's a deceptive motherfucker.  I drink it like it's Beam and then pay the price with the resulting gigantic hangover.

[Shockeye]

Someone did the test with Sauza Gold tequila as well.

8:05pm. First off, a baseline: the unfiltered Sauza.

 Dear lord, I think they got it mixed up with Turpentine. No really, you don't understand. I think I blacked out and saw Hell. And not because the Tequila sent me there, no. I think my brain was trying to find something more pleasant to focus on.

8:07pm. The other end of the spectrum, the 5-filtered Tequila.

 Smooth is an understatement. It's like someone oiled your tongue and throat. Unfortunately it's still got a back-bite, but much better than you'd expect from Tequila.

8:13pm. 4-filtered.

 No difference from the 5-filtered. If anything, less back-bite. Perhaps there was something in the 5th shotglass.

8:19pm. 3-filtered.

 The quality has dropped. A lot. I think I went blind for a minute. Fuck science, I'm not going any further. I think at this point we can say that 4 is the magic number. And 3 is how many hours I'm going to spend gargling with Scope to wash this godawful flavor away.

So concludes chapter one of my experimentation with Brita and Alcohol. More to come later. Perhaps with that Albertson's brand Rum you can spot in the background of some of the pictures.

[WayAbvPar]

Bah, Knob Creek all the way, but make the bottle last by only drinking it for the first one or two drinks. Then you have that bottle of Jimmy sitting around for the afterglow.

Actually, truth be told, Wild Turkey is my favorite bourbon, but I won't drink it because it's a deceptive motherfucker.  I drink it like it's Beam and then pay the price with the resulting gigantic hangover.

Jesus, I've had some hellacious hangovers from Wild Turkey. A bar we used to frequent would run outrageous specials on Wild Turkey on Thanksgiving night. My friends and I (about 6 of us) blew through 3 + bottles on Thanksgiving- there were only a few other people in the bar, and they weren't drinking Turkey. Fun, but I think I shaved a few years off my life (or added a few years onto my liver).

As for favorite bourbon, I love Booker Noe's and IW Harper (the latter of which is no longer available in my area for some weird reason). Maker's Mark and Knob Creek are also up there. I have a mini bottle of Basil Hayden's that I still haven't tried. Don't like Beam, and anything below that is undrinkable without mixing it- which is a capital offense, AFAIAC. Bourbon should be consumed neat or on the rocks.

[Shannow]

Heh you gotta read the article its fairly humourous.

Drinking copious amounts of bourbon whether it be Beam or the 'horrible crap under the sink cause we ran outa Beam' type has never given me hangovers...well ok thats a lie..never given me hangovers that I couldnt cope with.

Red wine though, crap, lets talk jackhammers on my head.

[Big Gulp]

Red wine though, crap, lets talk jackhammers on my head.

First time I ever got drunk at around 14 or so I had an older buddy of mine buy some booze for me.

Him:  "So what do you want?"

Me:  "Well, I don't like beer (remember, I was young).  How about the cheapest wine at the party store?"

Him:  "Boone's Farm it is!"

To this day I will not drink wine.  Even good wine.  Hate the stuff.  I think the nasty hangovers have to come from the sugar in wine.  You just don't get it as much from liquor, and it's always seemed to me that the higher quality the liquor the less the hangover.

[HaemishM]

Boone's is especially sugary, but the BF Sangria is decent with some slices of peach and plum in it.

If I'm going to drink Bourbon, my preference is for 10- or 12-year Old Charter. Mix it with Coke and a bit of ice, and you have luv in a glass.

[Big Gulp]

If I'm going to drink Bourbon, my preference is for 10- or 12-year Old Charter. Mix it with Coke and a bit of ice, and you have luv in a glass.

Why are you mixing good quality liquor?  You might as well piss in it while you're at it.  There's a reason bars have well liquor; it's because that's the cheap shit that you toss into a glass of Coke.

That's like I've seen people mix Glenlivet.  I'm not even a scotch drinker, and that's still fucking heresy to me.

[Samwise]

There is a very big difference between a mixed drink made with good liquor and a mixed drink made with bad liquor.  You might not be able to savor the flavor quite as thoroughly as you could drinking it straight, but it's not a complete waste, either.

Of course, YMMV based on the drink.  I wouldn't put good vodka into a Cosmo, but I wouldn't put cheap gin into a martini, either.

[Big Gulp]

I wouldn't put good vodka into a Cosmo

You are officially under suspicion.

[Dark Vengeance]

I understand what Samwise is getting at, but like with anything, there is a line you don't cross.

As a guy who drinks a lot of whiskey, I don't mix Crown Royal, and I won't mix Jameson (other than irish car bombs).

However, a lot of whiskey mixes overpower the flavor of the booze. OTOH, in Martinis, it's about enhancing the flavor of the liquor instead of covering it up.

Bring the noise.
Cheers............

[HaemishM]

I dig Old Charter and Coke. The good stuff just makes it better.

But if I'm going cheap, Kentucky Tavern gets the job done and takes the paint off the walls.

[CmdrSlack]

Wild Turkey was called the Kickin' Chicken where I went to college (Roll Tide!).

I will mix Beam.  I don't like Jack all that much, and beyond that, I prefer rocks or neat for my whiskey/bourbon/scotch.

A buddy of mine tried to mix some of my Johnny Walker Blue Label with a diet coke.

I almost gutted him with my ice tongs.

[Polysorbate80]

If I'm going to drink Bourbon, my preference is for 10- or 12-year Old Charter. Mix it with Coke and a bit of ice, and you have luv in a glass.

Why are you mixing good quality liquor?  You might as well piss in it while you're at it.  There's a reason bars have well liquor; it's because that's the cheap shit that you toss into a glass of Coke.

That's like I've seen people mix Glenlivet.  I'm not even a scotch drinker, and that's still fucking heresy to me.

Because sometimes the cheap stuff is so goddamn awful it's undrinkable--case in point, cheap gin tastes like drinking a pine tree, no matter what you dump in it.  You're pretty much forced into decent stuff, even if you're making a mixed drink.

[geldonyetich]

Maybe it tastes better, but I gotta wonder what the alchohol does to the filter and how much of the filtered drink you end up with vrs dissolved filter content.

Eh, but it's my nature to be worried over nothing.

[schild]

Eh, but it's my nature to be worried over nothing.

When that happens (which is a lot), Just don't say anything. K?

Edit: omg. WoW suxx0...errr....spelling.

[geldonyetich]

That'd cut down on the ol' post count, but then that's prolly for the best.

[Der Helm]

What the hell is wrong with these people ...

The whole idea to "improve" cheap wodka to make it drinkable must have come from a college student (talk about cliche's, Ha!).

There is a reason it tastes like shit, it is bad for you. I have seen people drink stuff that is used to "take the paint off the walls", just for the kick of it. Never saw them again after the ambulance arrived though.

I wonder what will happen when this guys apply their theory to terpentine or stuff like that. Yummy.

Personaly, if I have to drink booze, I try to stay with the good stuff, simply because I can't afford to get totaly wasted with it.

[Joe]

I've heard about this before, but never really bothered to give it a shot. I have a Brita filter just sitting there, filtering water like a champ.

It looks like it's tequila and vodka filtering time. Separate filters, I imagine.

[Shockeye]

It looks like it's tequila and vodka filtering time. Separate filters, I imagine.

That's no fun. Sometimes you just get a hankerin' for some vodquila.

[Paelos]

Given my irish background and love of the drink, I'll give this a shot when I get back from the holiday festivities and report back my results with a lower class vodka.

[UD_Delt]

Since this is the most recent alcohol related thread I figured I'd share this here.

Use this form to sign up for Johnny Walker mailings:

http://www.appreciatethejourney.com/docs/refer/

I got an invite to a nice presentation on Johnny Walker Black about 2 months ago. You are invited into a conference room starting with appetizers and an open bar for about an hour. Then you listen to a presentation on the history and blending of Johnny Walker Black. Then you they walk you through a tasting. Starting with an initial taste of Johnny Black followed by sampling some of the single malts that go into it and ending with again tasting the Black. For a novice it was interesting to notice the change once you can actually identify some of the single malts in a blend.

And all that for the bargain price of free can't be beat...

[WindupAtheist]

Man, WTF is wrong with you people?  The best liquor on earth still tastes like rubbing alcohol mixed with cigar ashes.  Drink beer.

[Dark Vengeance]

Man, WTF is wrong with you people?  The best liquor on earth still tastes like rubbing alcohol mixed with cigar ashes.  Drink beer.

Pfft. Lightweight.

Real men drink to the point of chemical dependence.

Bring the noise.
Cheers.............

[Alkiera]

Man, WTF is wrong with you people?  The best liquor on earth still tastes like rubbing alcohol mixed with cigar ashes.  Drink beer.

Because urine is a superior flavor to rubbing alcohol?

Ethyl alcohol is a foul substance.  Only use substances containing it for cooking, where the alcohol promptly boils off.

Alkiera

[SirBruce]

Am I a wuss for admitting I still like wine coolers?

Bruce

[WindupAtheist]

Quiet, fursuiter.

Listen, liquor is something people probably thought was poison until they noticed the guy they were trying to kill was having more fun than they were.  Beer, on the other hand, is an actual beverage.  It can be enjoyed with a meal, and you don't have to mix it with fruit juice and Red Bull to make it tolerable.

Plus everytime I go near hard liquor, I end up drinking it like water, and puking all over the place the next day.  I mean I'll be sitting there chugging beer merrily and rambling on in a horrible Scottish accent, when someone sadistic will claim that I must therefore drink scotch.  A couple (admittedly smallish) drinking glasses of straight scotch later, I don't know what planet I'm on.  Bastards.

[Hanzii]

Quiet, fursuiter.

Listen, liquor is something people probably thought was poison until they noticed the guy they were trying to kill was having more fun than they were.  Beer, on the other hand, is an actual beverage.  It can be enjoyed with a meal, and you don't have to mix it with fruit juice and Red Bull to make it tolerable

Someone with that uneducated view on liquor shouldn't go about calling a furry, who likes coolers, any names.
Pot.kettle.black. And all that.
Rejoin this thread when your balls drop and your voice changes.

[WindupAtheist]

Someone with that uneducated view on liquor shouldn't go about calling a furry, who likes coolers, any names.
Pot.kettle.black. And all that.
Rejoin this thread when your balls drop and your voice changes.

You mean when it changes into a burned-out throaty rasp?  By the way, that wasn't your balls dropping, that was your liver trying to escape.