NHL Playoffs '09

[Azaroth]

I doubt it's a sweep, but it's probably a 5 gamer.

Nobody but Crosby showed up for this series. Nobody.

Letang is now injured, and Kunitz is going to be suspended for a crosscheck on Varlamov.

Pens will take one in Pittsburgh, but it'll be over soon.



Oh, hey. Malkin? Fuck you, you Russian cocksucker. You and Gonchar need to stop being a couple of heartless, gutless pukes.

Thanks.

[Azaroth]

The worst part is that despite NOBODY showing up besides Crosby, the Penguins have actually been the better team all series. Varlamov has just been... ridiculous, and the Pens defense has been flat out fucking awful.

[naum]

Oh, hey. Malkin? Fuck you, you Russian cocksucker. You and Gonchar need to stop being a couple of heartless, gutless pukes.

It seems Gonchar spent by 3rd period… …his conditioning might be suspect, it doesn't look like he has enough in the tank, at least for the minutes he's logging… …and Letang showing he not up to postseason game, injury means we'll see Boucher in his spot (who else can fill that role, Gogoloski who spent most of 2nd half in WBS…)?

In defense of Malkin, he's getting mauled by Caps D and F both as they painted big crosshairs on him and his linemates are not stepping up… …they need to juggle the lines to give him a little help, I'd move Staal onto his line and let one play winger…

And unlike v. Phi, they're not winning faceoffs, which really exposes their poor D.

[Miguel]

Varlamov has just been... ridiculous

Varlamov looks like fucking Spiderman out there.

[Azaroth]

The worst part about Varlamov is that without him, the Pens be playing the Rangers.

What really fucking irked me, though, is the driveling stupidity of the media afterward.

After the first period CBC had Ron Mclean, Mike Milbury and Kelly Hrudy sitting around showing how ridiculously long Ovechkin's shifts were, how he doesn't buy in to the team concept, how much he floats, doesn't play defense, just fires the puck all the time and et cetera.

Well, yeah. That's Alexander Ovechkin. Like, not trying to knock the guy.. thats' what he does. Are you guys watching him for the very first time?

The game continues, and he continues to be AO. Playing the exact, very same fucking way he always does. He gets some good setups and fires a few in. Two from the circle on the powerplay (one into an empty net), and one rushing down on a defenseman one on one, using him as a screen. Frankly, it was an awful goal by Fluery. But that's what Alex Oveckin does every game. He either one times from the circle on the powerplay or he rushes in and uses the defenseman as a screen for a shot.

Three of his 21 shots hit the back of the net and these fucking troglodytes are blowing him all night after the game. And the media is still fucking teabagging themselves voluntarily all over his nuts. Calling it his best game ever. "Nobody can stop him", etc. Barely a mentioning that, you know, Crosby (or whoever that dude is) got a hat trick too.

I'm sorry, but what was he doing any different than he did in the first half of the game? I mean, someone did do something different - but it was Marc-Andre Fleury.

I don't know. This shit is starting to feel like the WWE. It's brainless shlock from a bunch of fickle mushheads who are always all too ready to hop immediately on board with the current media darling regardless of the fact that they were bashing the shit out of him 20 minutes ago.

And for good measure, I'm going to mention the fucking diving. Not because there was diving, and not because it was AO that was flopping around and looking at refs all night. Hell, not even because he randomly grabbed his face and fell to the ice like he'd been hit with a flying icepick despite the fact that nothing came near his face, and not even because that drew a penalty from the laughably WWE-caliber NHL referees.

But because, if Crosby pulled that shit, the media would be tearing him a new asshole for about six years straight. When AO does it, nobody says shit. Not a fucking word.

I'm reasonably close to watching games on mute and turning the television off between periods and immediately afterward. These people are fucking idiots.

[naum]

The game continues, and he continues to be AO. Playing the exact, very same fucking way he always does. He gets some good setups and fires a few in. Two from the circle on the powerplay (one into an empty net), and one rushing down on a defenseman one on one, using him as a screen. Frankly, it was an awful goal by Fluery. But that's what Alex Oveckin does every game. He either one times from the circle on the powerplay or he rushes in and uses the defenseman as a screen for a shot.

I dunno, Fleury should have stopped all the AO goals scored. Yeah, they're hard shots but it sure looked to me like he had a good look. I don't think he was screened on the one…

Goal scorers always get the glory. So he loafs at the blue line, waiting for a pass. You know what? Pens should have a D + F both marking him, but Pens don't have anybody that can handle him 1v1. Maybe Staal can skate with him, and have Orpik/Gill take him from the dots in…

A challenge for Bylsma, but Pens skaters still have to execute and it doesn't look like they have personnel to address AO. Maybe things are better on home ice when they get last line change, we'll see…

MIA: Chris Kunitz, Jordan Staal, Petr Sykora…

[Azaroth]

MIA:

Kunitz, Staal, Sykora, Malkin, Fedotenko, Gonchar, Guerin, Kennedy, Talbot, uh... etc.

Kunitz showed up for a few seconds at a couple points, actually. But that's about it.

It's been flat out Crosby vs. the Capitals.

Edit: I also completely agree that the goals, at least a couple of them, were pretty much on Fleury. That's kinda the point. Guy played the same way as when they were bashing him, but Fleury lets in a couple of relative softies and Ovechkin is suddenly Alex Ovchristchkin.

[Miguel]

The worst part about Varlamov is that without him, the Pens be playing the Rangers.

Yeah, but to be fair, the NHL playoff's have always been about the hot goalie.  Osgood, Hasek, Roy, just go down the list.

[Azaroth]

Yeah, but the frustrating part is that their goalie was Theodore. Out of nowhere comes this kid, completely randomly, that plays net like Jesus.

[naum]

Yeah, but the frustrating part is that their goalie was Theodore. Out of nowhere comes this kid, completely randomly, that plays net like Jesus.

Then after smoking the Pens, he'll revert back to below-average <-> above-average goalie in next series. Really hot goalies playing over their heads typically only lasts for a series. Sometimes two. Rarely can goalie alone power a team to a cup.

Though Capitals have some more ingredients. They just lack depth and experience. And the Penguins possess not much more in the experience department, just +1 season and a few castoffs with Cup signature engravings (Capitals have a few too, however, Fedorov comes to mind, but certainly I'm missing more, or am I?).

[Azaroth]

I dunno. I'd just be happy if someone would cover Ovechkin.

How can he constantly be wide-fucking-open?

[naum]

Not playoff related, but NHL breaking:

Blackberry Chief Bids for Coyotes
http://www.reuters.com/article/rbssTechMediaTelecomNews/idUSN0551773220090505

* Research in Motion co-CEO offers to buy Phoenix Coyotes

* Agrees to provide financing

* Offer conditional on team's relocation to Canada

SAN FRANCISCO, May 5 (Reuters) - Jim Balsillie, the co-chief executive of Canadian smartphone maker Research in Motion (RIM.TO), wants to import a hockey team up North.

Balsillie made a $212.5 million offer to buy the Phoenix Coyotes on Tuesday, following the team's bankruptcy filing. The offer is conditional on the team relocating to Southern Ontario, according to a statement.

Balsillie has also agreed to post debtor-in-possesion financing of $17 million.

In the statement, Balsillie said that the current team ownership asked he "table" an offer to buy the Coyotes, and that significant discussions resulted in an offer that is in the best interests of the franchise, the National Hockey League, and Canadian hockey fans.

NHL has been hostile to any Hamilton (or another Buffalo/Toronto area franchise that would encroach on the market of each), so I am curious if this will fly… …have not heard any more, but the local sports talk jocks are saying it's a done deal…

[Azaroth]

My theory on this is that Balsillie is in league with the NHL. He makes ridiculous offers constantly for teams that aren't worth a red cent and never actually GETS a franchise (four teams now?), thereby driving up the (at least publicly perceived) value of NHL franchises in general.

That said, a team near Toronto WOULD be profitable as fuck. It's just that the Leafs (and to a lesser extent, the Sabres) would never, ever allow it. They're suicide bomb the NHL offices before it happened.

[naum]

That said, a team near Toronto WOULD be profitable as fuck. It's just that the Leafs (and to a lesser extent, the Sabres) would never, ever allow it. They're suicide bomb the NHL offices before it happened.

I know that it would be popular and profitable. But /yes, Toronto (and Buffalo too) will put the kibosh on any proposed franchise there, as they see it cutting into their pie. Already, outside of the NY area teams (and back then Hartford too), Toronto and Buffalo are already at closest NHL distance.

[Mandrel]

I think they'd have better luck moving the team to Toronto proper, and hoping to divide the city a la Chicago with MLB.  If not, Vegas is constantly gunning for a major sports team. 

[Fordel]

There will never be another NHL team within the GTA. Ever.


Not while the fucking Leafs can pull in ten jillion dollars by simply EXISTING.

[Paelos]

I wonder how many times I have to watch the puck go in the net before they call it a goal? Apparently in Anaheim it doesn't matter that the whistle happened AFTER THE FUCKING PUCK CROSSED.

[Azaroth]

Intent to blow.

....


The whistle.



Regardless, Detroit just got royally screwed by.. well, like...

It's atrocious refereeing. It's... the NHL. I guess I can't be too surprised anymore.

But that shit was fucked up. Lol.

[Paelos]

Usually the reffing doesn't bother me in hockey. It's nowhere near as bad as the NBA or NFL at times.

Still, the fucking puck was in the net. The whistle happened after the puck went in. They showed it with sound several times. I don't give a green god damn what the intent of the ref is, that's a goal.

EDIT: If that's a rule it's a shitty rule and it should go away. Just like the dumbass rule about reviewable plays after whistles in the NFL went away because of the clusterfuck call by Ed Hochuly on the Denver fumble.

[Bunk]

I think you guys may end up being wrong about the whole second team in TO thing. It will end up in court battles.

Well, that was a hell of a better game by the 'nucks last night. Kessler was a forechecking god. Three or four times he caused a turnover in the Hawks end in the middle of the ice on his own. Was fucking brilliant.

[Azaroth]

Intent to blow the whistle is an actual rule, yes.

Doesn't change the fact that the whistle shouldn't have been blown, or the fact that the puck was in the net before it was.

It was a goal.

[naum]

I think you guys may end up being wrong about the whole second team in TO thing. It will end up in court battles.

Yes, will be interesting. Looks like Moyes (the "until 5/5/09" owner of the Coyotes) blindsided the NHL with his bankruptcy + sale deal forging. And it seems Blackberry dude was rather savvy this time resorting to subterfuge instead of open bidding.

But the puck is in the NHL zone now — they need to find a set of owners in Arizona or Vegas or Portland or Oklahoma City or Winnipeg or ?.

And curious to see what my home city who plunked down lots of taxpayer dough to secure the Coyotes (and to build up the sports mega-mall that surrounds Coyote (and Cardinal) facilities) does in response too.

But it's a team that's never won a playoff series, hasn't even qualified for post-season in 7 years. And they've failed to market and grow fans long-term - see what I wrote on this months ago - http://azplace.net/index.php?itemid=985 

[WayAbvPar]

I think you guys may end up being wrong about the whole second team in TO thing. It will end up in court battles.

Well, that was a hell of a better game by the 'nucks last night. Kessler was a forechecking god. Three or four times he caused a turnover in the Hawks end in the middle of the ice on his own. Was fucking brilliant.

Mason Raymond has been quietly effective during the playoffs too- glad to see him get a goal (what a pass by Kes). If the Sedin line could get going I would feel a lot better.

[Paelos]

If Phoenix is going under, I can't help but think Atlanta is probably next. To go from a winning the division in 06-07 to coming in 28th and 27th over the last two years, that's lead them to have the second to last average attendence in the league behind even Phoenix.

[naum]

If Phoenix is going under, I can't help but think Atlanta is probably next. To go from a winning the division in 06-07 to coming in 28th and 27th over the last two years, that's lead them to have the second to last average attendence in the league behind even Phoenix.

It's only been recent few years that Phoenix did not pack 'em in. First few seasons in new arena saw lots of sellouts and even when playing in old America West Arena (with 3-5K seats eliminated or offering obstructed view) Coyotes always were a strong draw (but they were making the playoffs every season in them years).

The move west really split them off from East Valley fans though. For me, I'm a few exits down the 101 but for people in Chandler, Mesa, Gilbert, Tempe, and even S. Scottsdale (N. Scottsdale not too bad, as you can just ride 101 loop), it means an hour drive to get to the games. Couple that with the silly league scheduling that means a lot of the teams Valley transplants are interested in seeing (Rangers, Penguins, Blackhawks, Red Wings, Devils) rarely come to visit.

But, bigger, like I wrote in my articles, Coyotes always focused short-term, and never made strides to grow the sport in Arizona. With rollerblades and 300+ days of sunshine, a plethora of roller rinks (outside and indoor), they should have evangellizing hockey, sticking sticks and skates in every youth's possession, and promoting leagues, etc.… …instead of the token player meet and greet autograph sessions and an occasional plug for the handful of actual ice sheets that exist in the "Valley of the Sun".

[Azaroth]

Lol.

Game starts, immediate bounce off the boards out infront of the net which Ovechkin, of course, pots.

As if they need the bounces here.

Malkin, again, doing jack shit.

Gonchar, our number one defenseman, immediately coughs up the puck if anyone looks at him crosseyed.

Staal... well, sonofabitch. What an awful draft pick. Honestly, look at the top 5 that year and look at what we could have had aside from Eric's Brother. How can your best year be your fucking rookie season.

[Strazos]

At least now some of you know how it feels to be a PHL fan watching a national telecast involving either PIT or WSH.

Mike Milbury has no business being in a modern telecast. The asses on VS and NBC just harp on 1 or 2 of Bettman's beloved players.

[Azaroth]

Oh, I've known that for some time. They suck the balls off of whoever is winning, and whoever is the current media darling.

Last two years, it's been OV. But before that, it was Crosby. And it was sickening each. and. every. time.

[Azaroth]

Although, to be ENTIRELY fair, Pierre Macguire was sucking the balls off of Richards that entire series.

Point is that, regardless, it's fucking sickening and annoying when it's done. It's also a mush headed way to broadcast a game. I expect better insight into what's going on in a game than "I BET SO AND SO'S BALLS TASTE GREAT".

[Paelos]

Dude, hockey's in the tank with popularity. They are trying to front the superstars so they can draw in fans. I'll more than admit I've watched games because OV is in there. Also, I hate the announcing quality, but that's what you get when your sport goes on strike and you sell off the TV rights to a 3rd rate network that does MMA and funnycar as it's other main draws.

[Azaroth]

Yeah, but I also hate that everything is so choreographed from the standpoint of "Here's what's good for the league, all of the media does it."

It makes it seems so... fake.

Either way, great outcomes tonight. Pens, then Canes. Awesome.

[naum]

Dude, hockey's in the tank with popularity. They are trying to front the superstars so they can draw in fans. I'll more than admit I've watched games because OV is in there. Also, I hate the announcing quality, but that's what you get when your sport goes on strike and you sell off the TV rights to a 3rd rate network that does MMA and funnycar as it's other main draws.

NBC has proven to be far worse. Of course, they only do a handful of games a season, so they have an excuse for their ineptness. Nor was ESPN that much better — I, for one, was thankful to be spared of Bill Clement (other than the hijinks of chugging everytime he uttered the word "torque"…).

And the whole notion of selling the superstars seems flawed to me. Instead, should be illustrating on how hockey embodies the elements of all the other major sports - power of football, skill of baseball, precision of golf, quickness of basketball, toughness of boxing, etc.… Or emphasizing the team play aspect - all 20 (or 15-18 come playoff time) are involved in the game, and each has a role to play, and if you loaded up with just *superstars*, your team would suck. The superstar focus obscures these elements and pegs hockey as a winter variant of basketball.

Best evangelism for the game is to get people to play it. They get an instant appreciation. Second best (and I have had opportunity to do this) is to show them the game at ice level — back when the Coyotes first moved to Phoenix, they held rookie camps at America West Arena (can't even recall what corporate moniker is on it now - US Airways?) and I worked next door — I brought workmates down for lunch and we went to ice level, sometimes just watching them do silly drills we did in peewee hockey — skating around pylons, puck passing, breakouts, etc.…, then I'd watch their jaws drop in awe as they got a closeup view of the speed and skill, whereas they came with preconceived notions of how it was a game for plodding oafs.

[Paelos]

I've brought several people to hockey games that have never watched the games before. Here are my conclusions from taking noobies:

- Going to games is always fun, but they don't like watching them on TV because they can't follow the puck.
- They don't understand play stoppages. Offsides is confusing at first.
- Everyone loves a good fight.
- Everyone loves a hard hit.
- People will not go to games if your team is sub-.500 after January.
- People don't pay much attention on the weekends while football is still going.
- People are more willing to get into hockey if they have someone knowledgable around them.
- People don't like the fact that the names are hard to pronounce.
- The playoffs are the BEST time to attract new fans.

[Azaroth]

See, maybe it's because I'm in Canada. But I have no desire to introduce people to my personal addiction. This trend of "Hockey is failing! We must help out good ship NHL Corporation!" is bullshit, imo. We're not fucking Jehovah's witnesses, and at least those dudes are going door to door advertising JESUS.

These fuckers make hockey games. I rikey. I don't give a fuck about their bottom line, and I'm not helping them out. They can eat my fucking ass with a side of potato salad, as I'm sure most if not all of them are rich old contemptible cocksuckers.

I understand that sometimes you want a friend or girlfriend to go to a hockey game or enjoy hockey with you or whatever. In that event, it's defensible to an extent and I get it. But this whole attitude that everyone needs to go door to door with crazy hats on to promote the NHL the last several years (promoted mostly by the media) is bullshit, imo.

[Paelos]

That attitude is exactly because you are from Canada. If people said similar stuff to me about baseball failing, I'd tell them to kiss my ass that it's our national past time and they need to get with the program.

The NHL from a Canadian viewpoint will be fine. I think it is failing hard in the South, and they need to start contracting the teams personally. Columbus, Atlanta, Nashville, Phoenix, and Florida should all be disbanded and have any actual talent reassigned. Also, they should get rid of the Islanders (who have been dead last in attendence 3/4 last years). Get the league to 24 teams with decent to great markets, make it 4 teams in every division, and call it a day.