To get to Austin from Phoenix you have to take Interstate Cruel Mistress

[schild]

I can't really begin to describe this drive. Think of it as a mix of OLD Egypt and Concept Art for Fallout. It's a damned wasteland. Every last bit of highway is just brown. There's no real way to describe how completely and utterly barren it is. Every 50-100 miles, there's a handful of gas stations and rednecks chomping at the bit to get their hands on some city folk just so they can show off their accent. The road is littered with trash and the border patrol think it's high time for a lynching. We actually had to drive through the border checkpoint so they could look in the car and make sure we 'weren't too brown.' Or at least, that's the look the guy gave me when he was trying to figure out whether I was Mexican, Wexican, Jew, or Terrorist.

The food on the highway is nothing like a drive from Virginia into the deep south or even West Virginia. No White's Truck Stops on this route! Best hamburger in the world? It's about 1800 miles thataway. We only have overcooked hotdogs and moonpies. I hope you like calories, chubbs. I can't say I'd trust anyone along this particular stretch of land to cook raw meat correctly anyhow. Suffice it to say, I opted for moonpies.

Speaking of moonpies, if you're ever making this drive, I suggest getting a DC Converter, a toaster, and lots of cheese and bread. You do not want to have to stop to use the bathroom. I think the truck drivers chose the hot dogs over the moonpies. Fat, slovenly, drool-stained bastards. Oh, on the topic of animals; what in the nine hells? Dead deer on the side of the road? Frogs? Beetles the size of silver dollars? What the hell is this?

Needless to say, I did not like the first 700 miles (yea, we did 700 miles in like 10 hours. Woop. 70 steady the whole way cept El paso). It only rained for about 18 minutes but it was rain like I hadn't seen since the British Isles. It doesn't just Rain in Mexico and Texas, it's a free high-powered (god-powered?) car wash. I swear, they weren't drops, they were damned streams.

Anyway, we finally hit some remnant of civilization. The 'folks' here call it 'the mid-point.' That's fancy speak for halfway between El Paso and San Antonio. Considering that's only a 400 mile drive, I can't believe this many people stop here. Every hotel except for one was full. So what started as a $350 day turned into $150. Feel free to donate as the ONLY benefits I got out of this were a smoking room, a queen sized bed, and the ability to make this post.

Oh, right, and this post only got made because the fucking cable is out. THANKS TEXAS. Seriously, can we get to firebombing everything outside of Austin? Ugh. I'd rather be in Darfur.

[schild]

BTW, I didn't say to donate because I want the money. I would consider a firebombing a donation as well.

[lamaros]

So what started as a $350 day turned into $150.

Other way around, right?

[Paelos]

There's only one cool thing in West Texas, and that's Big Bend National Park.

I've driven similar distances in one day across basically the entire south, but never across West Texas because there's nothing that direction I would ever want to visit.

[schild]

So what started as a $350 day turned into $150.

Other way around, right?

I meant $350 turned into $500. Ugh.

Paelos, National Parks can eat me. That crap is for old folks and hippies. The only National Park I care about is the National Park of Concrete Jungle.

[FatuousTwat]

National Parks can eat me.

FUCKING KIDS! ARRRRRRRRRGH!

[Nerf]

God, I remember those bathrooms, I don't think I shit once from Dallas to Vegas, although I'm pretty sure I did on the way back.  I must have loaded up about 50 of those sani-seat covers over that shit, I almost emptied out the stall next to me after I ran out in mine.

God I hate truck stops.

Edit:

WELCOME TO TEXAS MOTHERFUCKER! YEEHAW!

[Selby]

I've done the California to Texas and back again drive multiple times along I-10.  It is a vast wasteland of pretty much empty nothing-ness.  If you were halfway between San Antonio and El Paso (Ozona?) I'd have said just keep on driving to Austin.  It's only another 5-6 hours of driving.

[Big Gulp]

Why even get a hotel?  Shit, I used to make the 20 hour drive from Colorado to Michigan (and back) in one fell swoop.  Don't stop for anything but gas.  When you buy gas buy some soda and piss in the empty bottles while driving.  If you get sleepy roll down the windows and turn up the stereo.

Hotels are for pussies.

[Oz]

my favorite part of texas is that everyone has a side arm.  its a little unsettling to see 3 rednecks with pistols and cowboy hats at the local green burrito. 

[schild]

Why even get a hotel?  Shit, I used to make the 20 hour drive from Colorado to Michigan (and back) in one fell swoop.  Don't stop for anything but gas.  When you buy gas buy some soda and piss in the empty bottles while driving.  If you get sleepy roll down the windows and turn up the stereo.

Hotels are for pussies.

We probably could've, but we were running on empty really. For the last 72 hours I had only had about 5 hours of Good Sleep. This was necessary.

[Salamok]

looks like someone forgot to warn you, I take the north Route specifically to avoid the splendor that is west Texas, it would be a slight detour from Phoenix but probably worth it. 

[dusematic]

Why even get a hotel?  Shit, I used to make the 20 hour drive from Colorado to Michigan (and back) in one fell swoop.  Don't stop for anything but gas.  When you buy gas buy some soda and piss in the empty bottles while driving.  If you get sleepy roll down the windows and turn up the stereo.

Hotels are for pussies.

lol. EXTREME

[schild]

We have roughly 373 miles left to go today. We'll be able to knock that out right quick. Gonna pack up here shortly, don't burn the place down thx.

[Cyrrex]

We have roughly 373 miles left to go today. We'll be able to knock that out right quick. Gonna pack up here shortly, don't burn the place down thx.

Dude - less posting and more driving.

[Trippy]

Why even get a hotel?  Shit, I used to make the 20 hour drive from Colorado to Michigan (and back) in one fell swoop.  Don't stop for anything but gas.  When you buy gas buy some soda and piss in the empty bottles while driving.  If you get sleepy roll down the windows and turn up the stereo.

Hotels are for pussies.

We probably could've, but we were running on empty really. For the last 72 hours I had only had about 5 hours of Good Sleep. This was necessary.

Last time I had a major move I stayed up for 72 hours straight (not even naps). That was the longest I'd ever been up. I was actually hallucinating while driving -- the bushes and trees looked like animals. It was actually kind of cool since I knew what was going on.

[Trippy]

Gonna pack up here shortly, don't burn the place down thx.

Sure thing boss

[Salamok]

Why even get a hotel?  Shit, I used to make the 20 hour drive from Colorado to Michigan (and back) in one fell swoop.  Don't stop for anything but gas.  When you buy gas buy some soda and piss in the empty bottles while driving.  If you get sleepy roll down the windows and turn up the stereo.

Hotels are for pussies.

lol. EXTREME

lol reminds me of my last Austin to CA trip, made the wife drive it straight through in shifts.  Good times!  Everytime she piped up about my speeding I just said "oh good yer awake, your turn to drive." This method had her driving about 18 of the 26 hours.

I don't think she has forgiven me yet.

[Chimpy]

You should have sold your car and flown.

[Salamok]

went to edit and hit quote instead.   forum 1, Sal 0

[HaemishM]

Dude, it's TEXAS. What did you expect?

[Grand Design]

I once drove nine hours through Texas to San Antonio with an icechest full of beer to keep me awake.

[FatuousTwat]

So, have you said Yall or YEEEEHAW out loud yet? 

[stray]

People will wonder what the fuck you're up to if you say Yeehaw. In a city at least. All of the yeehaw shit is in the small towns, like Lubbock and Midland, and this oil pumped wasteland Schild is driving through atm. The rest of the cities are huge, badly planned, spread out urban areas. Lots of suburbia and city life. Square acreage wise, I don't think cities get any bigger.

The vibe you'll get from San Antonio is some weird amalgam of suburbia, military, and Tejano. You might be able to pull off a "AAAIIIHAIIIHAII" with a sombrero hat on here. Maybe. Austin's unofficial motto is "Keep Austin Weird". I mean, that city was the birthplace of Psychedelic music (Roky Erickson), not country. Houston is just packed and dirty as fuck. Something that can almost put Jersey to shame. Dallas has a proper skyline and big urban vibe, but I'd say it's the most Yeehaw of the bunch. Go there if you want to be an urban hick.

[Paelos]

Dallas is pretty urban hick. It's a common past-time in the richer areas to act like you're a redneck. I did not associate with these people much because they were idiots.

[murdoc]

This has nothing to do with Texas, but for 10 days everyone in Calgary says yahoo and wears cowboy hats and I HATEHATEHATEHATE it.

[rattran]

The drive across 10 or 10/20 is horrible from Phoenix.

17N to 40E is much better, mountains, indians, decent food, clean gas stations. Then you get to Texas and it all goes to shit. I always used to fill up at the last stop in New Mexico, then see if I could make it all the way to Oklahoma without stopping.

[Morat20]

Dude, it's TEXAS. What did you expect?

West Texas is...empty. Nice place for windfarms, which is really taking off. But it's mostly empty -- remnants of oil land, ranch land, occasionally places where someone is managing to grow shit despite minimal water (it's dry out there. Panhandle is the same way).

East Texas -- along the border -- is worse, because it manages to combine the worst of the West Texas attitude with the casual racism of the deep south.

The cities aren't too bad. Austin, as noted, is weird. UT's there, there's a thriving tech industry, and there's a good indy music scene. Dallas is -- Dallas is old-style money, mostly, and you don't get more "White Flight" than some of it's north suburbs.

San Antonio isn't bad -- a lot more Mexican influence there, kind of a southwest city thing.

Houston is -- sprawled. REALLY sprawled. That's slowly starting to reverse (it's too fucking expensive to drive) but that'a s decades long project. A decent fine arts community (decent museums, opera, shows, that sort of thing). Good food, and suprisingly varied. It's dirty, though -- refineries along the east side, the port proper, and years of neglect cause problems. But as noted, the city is starting to gentrify and ever since Tom Delay got shitcanned, actual plans for transit have popped up. We may actually get our first real zoning around the airports (there's some lawsuit there) -- otherwise, Houson is COMPLETE unzoned.

Which has led to the Homeowner's Associations From Hell.

Lot of rednecks, though -- the Rodeo is held here, after all. Lots of immigrants, though, so the racists are having a hard time of it. Then again, White Flight was pretty big here and it hasn't ever totally left. City I live in had a sign warning blacks not to linger past sunset up until the 70s. Gone now, thank god.

But West Texas -- the area that Schlid drove through -- is just an empty wasteland. It's starting to boom -- I'm not kidding about wind power being huge there -- but right now, it's desolate.

[Salamok]

Dude, it's TEXAS. What did you expect?

West Texas is...empty. Nice place for windfarms, which is really taking off. But it's mostly empty -- remnants of oil land, ranch land, occasionally places where someone is managing to grow shit despite minimal water (it's dry out there. Panhandle is the same way).
...stuff...
But West Texas -- the area that Schlid drove through -- is just an empty wasteland. It's starting to boom -- I'm not kidding about wind power being huge there -- but right now, it's desolate.

You all are forgetting about all the telescopes! It's an amateur astronomer paradise in west Texas.  Seems like every 3rd house (aka every 15 miles) some guy is packing a scope large enough to require a building with a retractable dome.

[Morat20]

You all are forgetting about all the telescopes! It's an amateur astronomer paradise in west Texas.  Seems like every 3rd house (aka every 15 miles) some guy is packing a scope large enough to require a building with a retractable dome.

True, no light pollution. :). There's several decent observatories in Texas. McDonald's is a UT-affliate out in West Texas, and I think SFA and Sam Houston have one apiece.

Too low for the really great telescopes -- but real science is real science. :)

Of course, JSC is in Houston -- where astronauts are wrapping up training to go upgrade Hubble for the next decade. (Which, I admit, took some serious fighting. The shuttle schedule is tight, but Hubble is important).

[Fabricated]

I drove from Indiana to Sacramento California. Quit'cher bitchin'. Also yes there is not a goddamn thing in 70%+ of Texas. It's dirt and scrubbrush for all of eternity.

[stray]

70% of anywhere is nothing. Even New York has it's hicks. Only possible exception may be Cali...there's shit to do even in the deserts there.

[apocrypha]

Unh... sorry to interrupt this thread with complete randomness but if you scroll up to replies #24 and #25 you'll see that Paelos avatar is dancing almost but not quite in time with murdoc's avatars clapping and it's breaking my head!




Er... on-topic... hmmm.. OK, I've been to San Antonio once, I liked it! Except the downtown Holiday Inn we stayed in was the first genuinely roach-infested hotel I'd ever experienced O_o

[Murgos]

Only possible exception may be Cali...there's shit to do even in the deserts there.

Cali has plenty of hicks.  The entire 'Inland Empire' is pretty much nothing but shit kickers.

[Salamok]

weird thing about Texas is that even though it has a shitload of barren wasteland someone thinks it's worth something enough to own it.  Fun Texas fact #382 - Texas has the lowest percentage public property of any state (2% or so).

Of course I don't actually give enough of a crap to actually confirm this by checking the numbers in other states but I've heard it said a few times and considering the size and quantity of state parks in TX it feels like a true statement.

edit: guess I was wrong I did find this map covering federally owned land http://strangemaps.files.wordpress.com/2008/06/map-owns_the_west.jpg then again if you don't look at it in percentages but go by sheer land mass TX would win hands down.  Still not sure what the break down on state owned land would be.