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Author Topic: Top Chef  (Read 37181 times)
voodoolily
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on: May 12, 2008, 10:42:40 PM

If this is already a thread, I couldn't find it.

Culinary Boner is hilare, also love Dale and his sexah lil' Napoleon complex, hate the fauxhawk fetal alcohol syndrome guy with pink skin. God, what is his annoying nickname? He looks like a fucking burn victim.

It's gonna be Dale, Andrew and FAS in the top three though.

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Margalis
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Reply #1 on: May 12, 2008, 11:05:39 PM

Is Andrew the spazzy one who appears to be on coke? The one who is basically Tweak from South Park made flesh?

Antonia could make it far, she's done really well.

Edit: Fixed numerous errors.
« Last Edit: May 13, 2008, 01:54:42 AM by Margalis »

vampirehipi23: I would enjoy a book written by a monkey and turned into a movie rather than this.
voodoolily
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Reply #2 on: May 12, 2008, 11:21:15 PM


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SuperPopTart
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I am damn cute for a stubby shortling.


Reply #3 on: May 12, 2008, 11:24:27 PM

Nah Antonia is too "nice" to be in the top. She seems like a competent cook but meh, she isn't professional enough or seems to have enough of an edge.


Richard - I like Blais, he's going to make it.

Dale - Dick, but really great skills.

And I'm kind of caught between Andrew and Stephanie. Stephanie is like a little old woman that will kick your ass if you come too close but Andrew is a doof. But he's got skills.


And Andrew is the one that kind of looks like Shaggy from Scooby Doo.



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schild
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Reply #4 on: May 12, 2008, 11:28:10 PM

Dale is not a dick. He's a fucking Chef.

And Blaise happens to have some skills to back up his masturbatory bullshit.

They're the only 2 that deserve to be in the finals, and Blaise will probably fuck up.

Everyone else is a hack and I don't want a repeat of Season 2 with that Elan bullshit.

In conclusion, he doesn't look like Shaggy.
voodoolily
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Reply #5 on: May 12, 2008, 11:38:39 PM

I refuse to call him "Blaze". He can cook, make no mistake, but he still looks like he literally bathes in hot duck fat. And not in a good way.

Andrew's tapioca caviar is tired, but the dude is a laugh a minute. Quality TV.

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SuperPopTart
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I am damn cute for a stubby shortling.


Reply #6 on: May 13, 2008, 12:05:13 AM

Dale is not a dick. He's a fucking Chef.

And Blaise happens to have some skills to back up his masturbatory bullshit.

They're the only 2 that deserve to be in the finals, and Blaise will probably fuck up.

Everyone else is a hack and I don't want a repeat of Season 2 with that Elan bullshit.

In conclusion, he doesn't look like Shaggy.

No no, Dale's a dick. There is no question about that. Anyone who punches a locker cause they hate losing gets put in the bottom of that category. When he rolled his eyes about Nikki the talentless hack not being able to make mayo by hand, THAT was him being a chef.

I do kinda agree about those two being the only two that really belong up there, though Andrew does have some skills and so does Stephanie, she's been in the top repeatedly.


I am Super, I am a Pop Tart.
schild
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Reply #7 on: May 13, 2008, 12:08:00 AM

Andrew is a shaky yutz who needs to stay on til the semi-finals for comedic value. Stephanie isn't even as good as that redhead who lost BADLY in season 1.
Margalis
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Reply #8 on: May 13, 2008, 01:57:58 AM

I can't hate Blaise too much. He seems like a genuinely good, if douchey and annoying, guy.

vampirehipi23: I would enjoy a book written by a monkey and turned into a movie rather than this.
Xerapis
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Reply #9 on: May 13, 2008, 02:55:04 AM

Every time I see Andrew, I think of Haemish.

Maybe there's some sort of counseling for that?

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Reply #10 on: May 13, 2008, 08:04:23 AM

I think I like Andrew the best.  Dale is a dick.  Pointy head man will probably win.

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HaemishM
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Reply #11 on: May 13, 2008, 11:31:33 AM

Every time I see Andrew, I think of Haemish.

Maybe there's some sort of counseling for that?

Unfortunately, you are correct, sir. I look a good bit like that fucker, and everytime he opens his gob I want to punch him directly in the junk. He makes me hate myself. I may even talk with the same frenetic pace with him. I really really hate him.

I think the final 4 will come down to Dale, Andrew, Stephanie and Blaze, with Blaze and Dale being the finalists. I long for the day when they jettison "Funny Hat Cockmouth" or FHC Spike. That fucker is just begging to get slapped.

Nebu
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Reply #12 on: May 13, 2008, 12:21:55 PM

I'm going with Dale and Richard in the finals.  I think Dale has the skills and Richard has the creativity.  They may just keep Lisa around because her attitude makes for good television.  Her and Dale in the finals would be drama +++

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schild
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Reply #13 on: May 13, 2008, 12:23:32 PM

I'm going with Dale and Richard in the finals.  I think Dale has the skills and Richard has the creativity.  They may just keep Lisa around because her attitude makes for good television.  Her and Dale in the finals would be drama +++

Drama is what left us with Season 2 The Shit Season instead of Top Chef.
Johny Cee
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Reply #14 on: May 13, 2008, 03:41:02 PM

Every time I see Andrew, I think of Haemish.

Maybe there's some sort of counseling for that?

Unfortunately, you are correct, sir. I look a good bit like that fucker, and everytime he opens his gob I want to punch him directly in the junk. He makes me hate myself. I may even talk with the same frenetic pace with him. I really really hate him.

I think the final 4 will come down to Dale, Andrew, Stephanie and Blaze, with Blaze and Dale being the finalists. I long for the day when they jettison "Funny Hat Cockmouth" or FHC Spike. That fucker is just begging to get slapped.

I swear to god,  I caught myself thinking "wow, how did Haemish have time to post while he was doing this?" a couple of times while watching Top Chef.

My locks for final four:

Richard Blaise is probably the guy to beat.  How many eliminations has he won now?  He's competant/knowledgable,  and is willing to put a new twist on whatever he does.  Everyone else has phoned it in a couple times at least.

Andrew seems to be pretty solid.  He has repeated a couple dishes/tricks (the crispy chicken, the faux-caviar), though, but he hasn't sank the depths of mediocrity some of the others have.  I give him credit for never being whiny or back-talking.

The other two slots go to some combination of:

Stephanie has done some good work.  I'd rate her higher if not for the fact that she constantly seems on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

Antonia has some skills.  I'm not sure if it's just the editing,  but she comes off poorly as a person some times.

Dale seems to be pretty solid,  but I'm pegging him for some kind of glorious meltdown.


Spike just needs to go away.  And he isn't that talented.

Lisa has done some good stuff,  but she has some kind of anti-charisma that is very off-putting.

SuperPopTart
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I am damn cute for a stubby shortling.


Reply #15 on: May 13, 2008, 08:03:12 PM

Dale will be on the far side of tomorrow soon, I think.

And poor Stephanie, she really does look crazy sometimes.. something about "Mr. Speed Artichoke Man" just kind of sat wrong with me.


On a side note, I think Andrew and Antonia have a "thing".

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voodoolily
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Reply #16 on: May 13, 2008, 09:05:36 PM

You're just saying that because Antonia is Italian/Mediterranean like you and Andrew looks like your husband.

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SuperPopTart
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I am damn cute for a stubby shortling.


Reply #17 on: May 13, 2008, 09:20:40 PM

I joined a convent very recently. I am married to Jesus.  evil


Oh, and NIX and I are running away together.

We are gonna pick up Signe on the way.

I am Super, I am a Pop Tart.
voodoolily
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Reply #18 on: May 13, 2008, 09:39:51 PM

Nix! That two-timing good for nothing sunnuva...

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Signe
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Reply #19 on: May 13, 2008, 09:44:27 PM

woo hoo!

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Abagadro
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Reply #20 on: May 13, 2008, 10:21:49 PM

Andrew is completely full of crap but you don't get to be Sous Chef at Le Cirque being a slouch in the kitchen. He seems like he isn't taking the show very seriously though. I love the description of Lisa as "charisma free zone." If I had to work in her kitchen I would kill myself. She's like one of those Warner Brothers cartoon characters that has a permanent rain cloud over their head.  Spike is worthless but at least he called Dale out on his shit this last episode. Dale can cook but is a complete bonehead. I think the final 3 will come down to Richard, Stephanie and Dale/Antonia depending on who has a meltdown in the penultimate show. I think the order of who gets the boot from here on out to set up a three way showdown will be:

Spike
Lisa
Andrew
Antonia/Dale


"As democracy is perfected, the office of president represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people. On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.

-H.L. Mencken
Margalis
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Reply #21 on: May 13, 2008, 10:44:52 PM

I kind of like Lisa and her attitude. Maybe because she reminds me of someone.

vampirehipi23: I would enjoy a book written by a monkey and turned into a movie rather than this.
NiX
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Reply #22 on: May 14, 2008, 08:29:50 AM

I need to stop sleeping. All the important stuff seems to happen then and now I'm in trouble. ACK!
HaemishM
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Reply #23 on: May 14, 2008, 11:06:43 AM

Spike has made it as far as he has by throwing other people under the bus. He seems to be the weakest chef on there.

See, I think Dale IS a dick, but he's a dick with cause most of the time, in the "I don't suffer fools lightly" kind of way. And now that I think about it, Andrew for as mouthy as he is, has probably been one of the most respectful when it comes to talking to the judges.

SuperPopTart
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I am damn cute for a stubby shortling.


Reply #24 on: May 14, 2008, 11:13:30 PM

Okay that's it. I call bullshit.

I am miffed.

 this guy looks legit DRILLING AND MANLINESS this guy looks legit


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Abagadro
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Reply #25 on: May 14, 2008, 11:39:20 PM

Well my predictions were their usual level of accuracy.  Ohhhhh, I see.

"As democracy is perfected, the office of president represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people. On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.

-H.L. Mencken
Margalis
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Reply #26 on: May 15, 2008, 12:46:54 AM

Lisa did bother me with her behavior. But Andrew let his ego get the better of him. Too many people are just "I do what I do yo!" even when what they do isn't related to what they're supposed to be doing at all.

vampirehipi23: I would enjoy a book written by a monkey and turned into a movie rather than this.
SuperPopTart
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I am damn cute for a stubby shortling.


Reply #27 on: May 15, 2008, 01:56:18 AM

But Spike is a moron. I wanna slap those damn hats off of his head.

I am glad he moved briefly to a pink bandana.


I am Super, I am a Pop Tart.
Xerapis
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Reply #28 on: May 15, 2008, 03:34:33 AM

Lisa is such a bitch.  Honestly.  Can't cook rice, can't cook shrimp?  Get the fuck out!

I'm gonna miss Haemish Andrew.

Hell, I would have loved to have seen them eliminate Spike AND Lisa.  Dumbass chicken salad with a tomato, lettuce, and piece of fucking bread on the side just to dick over everyone else.

Good thing I'm already gay, so I don't have to feel bad about getting worked up over this show ~evil grin~

..I want to see gamma rays. I want to hear x-rays. I want to...smell dark matter...and feel the solar wind of a supernova flowing over me...
schild
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Reply #29 on: May 15, 2008, 03:41:39 AM

Spike played the rules perfectly and stayed middle of the pack perfectly. That's all you have to do until the final 4.

Andrew had been fucking up a lot. Yea, he's funny, but he had to go.

Seeing Dale win was great as he makes everyone except Blaise look like amateur hour.

Lisa is barely fucking skating by. People just keep fucking up more than her. I do want to punch her right in the babymaker though.

I'm still calling Blaise and Dale in the finals unless the judges really feel the need to give women a pity vote. Neither of them are even in the same realm as those two. On that note, I'd really like to see a woman who can compete.

Nice to see my boy Sam again.
Xerapis
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Reply #30 on: May 15, 2008, 03:53:18 AM

Was it just me, or did it look like Sam has lost weight?

Blaze is starting to wear on me a little.  I'd rather see Dale VS Antonia.

..I want to see gamma rays. I want to hear x-rays. I want to...smell dark matter...and feel the solar wind of a supernova flowing over me...
SuperPopTart
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I am damn cute for a stubby shortling.


Reply #31 on: May 15, 2008, 04:05:31 AM

I think, after tonight I gotta go with Dale and Richard being in the final two. Lisa is going to fuck herself up and Antonia - meh, still think she isn't good enough.

I can't *wait* for Stephanie to self destruct. It's so coming. Very eerily..she reminds me of Rachel Ray..

I am Super, I am a Pop Tart.
schild
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Reply #32 on: May 15, 2008, 04:10:26 AM

Was it just me, or did it look like Sam has lost weight?

Blaze is starting to wear on me a little.  I'd rather see Dale VS Antonia.

The only reason Dale vs Antonia would EVER happen would be because Blaise forgot to clean a fish again or too many women complained that the show favors men. The former might happen. All depends on Restaurant Wars next week. I couldn't tell from the preview, but if Dale and Richard are on the same team, one of the girls are probably gone.

I'm gonna assume it's guys vs girls though because they seem to have evened it up on purpose.

-

And no, he got a haircut and shaved a bit nicer is all. (Sam, that is).
Xerapis
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Reply #33 on: May 15, 2008, 04:14:52 AM

I see.

Cause Korean TV is showing season 2 right now on the "gay" channel (not it's real name).

and Sam was looking much hotter in this episode compared to back then

I know Blaze flaming out isn't likely, but I can hope.  Oddly, I really liked him at the beginning.  He just got too annoying.  I don't have any complaints about his cooking ability, I'm being totally shallow here.

..I want to see gamma rays. I want to hear x-rays. I want to...smell dark matter...and feel the solar wind of a supernova flowing over me...
voodoolily
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Reply #34 on: May 15, 2008, 10:32:17 AM

It's on the "gay" channel in the US, too.


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The Legend of Zephyr - a different blog.
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