FUCKING GUILD WARS n' stuff n' things

[dannyBstyle]

OK so, schild suggested (HE DID NOT MAKE ME, STFU SCHILD!!!! ) that I buy the GW Plat edition. And I've been playing it and loving it and stuff. But when schild tries to play, his Apple II Tandy Macintosh Colecovision Family Computer (Sapphire Edition '95) locks up at startup and dicks fill the screen. One of the things in that last sentence is imaginary, happy hunting!

Anyway, since schild is by law a little girl, he would not do research himself to try and remedy the problem, so I did the research for him as he berated me every time I suggested a solution. Looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong story shooooooooooooooooort -

We tried the following -
Updated GFX drivers, Mobo drivers, BIOS
Tried Omega Drivers
Tried older versions of Nvidia drivers
Disabled Sound Card and used onboard
Disabled 2nd core of CPU upon launch
raped a unicorn with a mango
Launched in Win2000 compatibility mode
bought a giant Vornado® fan and pointed it directly into his open computer
activated Speedfan to max out all internal fans
shit into my hand and threw it at a republican
used the shortcut command -image to load all content prior to game start
tried all possible configurations of image quality settings in Nvidia control panel
slapped my dick in his imaginary girlfriend's face
installed on a different hard drive
installed from DVD
installed from downloaded setup thing dealie from their website
made an offering of a virgin (Ookii) to the divine bullgod
disabled ALLLLLL unessential processes and services
disabled windows auto-restart and waited for blue screen. which, like a Thai Shemale, never came.

So. Still fucking does it. Locks up either on load or after 10 seconds of horribly stuttering through 4 or 5 fucking gorgeous frames of Old Ascalon.

I can't tell you how emotional last night was. We wept, we cheered, we spooned, we raged, we troubleshot, and I PLAYED GUILD WARS HA HA MOTHER FUCKER.

So help. Please help. Schild needs it, and I need someone to play with. He's got a core 2 duo and an 8600gts.

[Trippy]

Take your video card and put it in his computer.

[dannyBstyle]

he says my card has AIDS

[Trippy]

Okay, stick his video card in *your* computer.

[dannyBstyle]

but he has AIDS

[Trippy]

One of you has to suck it up.

How much RAM does his comp have? You could try loading up a bunch of crap and then trying to run the game. What are his virtual memory settings?

It could just be the game simply doesn't like his computer. I had a similiar problem, uh, 3 years ago -- the game would only run for like 10 minutes before crashing. Every time. No other game out of the literally hundreds I played on that computer ever had that sort of problem. The only solution I could find was to build another computer.

[schild]

E6600
2GB DDR2 800

And yea, building another computer has been something I've been looking at.

[Trippy]

It's possible either your RAM is messed up or parts of your hard drive and now corrupted thanks to your earlier errors. You could try loading stuff to fill up the first GB of RAM and then trying to run the game or you could run something like memtest for a few hours. Your swapfile or the game files themselves could also be sitting on bad sectors now.

[Phildo]

Ahahahahahahahaha, thread!  I laughed until I cried.  Thank you for this, DannyB!